Mythfits: 101 Reasons to Become a Barbarian Hero
an excerpt

Eric groaned inwardly. As much as he hated life at the Wizards Collegium, there was nothing in the world that could match his hatred for the weekly luncheons he was forced to attend. Grizelda wasn’t bad company at all, but when Eric’s father and she were together, it was like putting a cat and a dog together and telling them to play nice.
“I can walk myself, you know,” Eric grumbled as his father tugged him along relentlessly. The old man paid no heed, however, and continued to drag Eric down the many flights of stairs, out across the entrance hall, and into the courtyard where the luncheon was to be held.
Grizelda was already there and waiting for them. She smirked when she saw Eric being pulled along by his father, but as soon as Eric’s father reached the table, the smirk was gone.
“Ulrich,” she said blandly.
“Grizelda,” he replied in a bored tone.
Eric slumped into his seat and willed himself to disappear.
“Nice weather we’re having,” Grizelda commented, pouring herself a cup of tea from the silver pitcher on the table.
“Indeed,” Ulrich agreed, helping himself to the first cup.
Eric stared blankly at a spot on the table, wondering if it were physically possible for him to sink into the ground.
“Have a cup of tea, boy,” Grizelda told Eric, offering him a cup.
“My name is Eric,” Eric mumbled, taking the cup.
“Be polite, boy,” Ulrich snapped.
“Thanks,” Eric sighed, taking a sip.
“How are your students doing?” Grizelda asked, turning her attention back to Ulrich.
“Not bad, not bad,” Ulrich replied. “And yours?”
“Twits, the lot of them,” Grizelda sighed. “As always. I have no hope.”
“Of course,” Ulrich said, nodding. “They’re gels. What do you expect out of a bunch of fluff-headed gels?”
“Fluff-headed gels, are they?” Grizelda said icily, narrowing her eyes. “Better than your lot of boys with hair for brains.”
“Are you insulting my students, madam?” Ulrich asked coldly.
“Not at all, sir,” Grizelda replied. “I am merely stating the facts.”
“The facts, madam, are that any of my boys could best any of your gels in any area you wished to test them.”
Eric clutched his cup tightly and tried to ignore the conversation.
“Ulrich,” Grizelda replied smoothly, “I hesitate to suggest that your students are less than adept, but I do believe any of mine could best yours at any challenge you proposed.”
“Grizelda,” Ulrich said, forcing himself to smile, “I would remind that it was Woden who hung himself by the Pool of Knowledge near the uttermost depths of the underworld, and thus discovered the runes, creating runic magic as we know it today.”
“That’s what you’d like to think, you pompous old windbag,” Grizelda snorted. “I’ll have you know it was Rowena, a witch of great standing, who travelled to the Pool of Knowledge and gazed at it until it revealed its secrets to her.”
“My dear woman, you are most mistaken,” Ulrich replied mildly. “It was indeed Woden, and he did indeed hang himself. It is so written within the runes. Eric agrees with me, don’t you, boy?”
“Er…what? Oh, um. Well. I think it’s rather grisly, isn’t it?” Eric replied, grimacing. “I mean, some bloke hanging himself just for a few letters? You don’t think he made them up?”
Grizelda’s lips twitched with an amused smile as Ulrich stared at the young man. “Blasphemy! Woden was a great wizard, and you, boy, are not worthy to even mention his name!”
“That’s a bit harsh,” Grizelda smiled. “I quite agree. Only a man would think it necessary to hang himself in order to learn a new alphabet. Rowena was a proper woman. She knew how to get what she wanted.”
“Oh yes, I can see your point,” Ulrich snapped. “Only a woman would think it reasonable to sit and stare at a pond for hours on end!”
“She learned the Witch’s Way,” Grizelda replied. “That which you wizards call the runic alphabet is nothing more than a funny way of writing down what you want. Rowena learned that such illusions are not necessary.”
“Woden was a spell caster of great renown!”
“Rowena was a witch.” Grizelda took a long sip of her tea, gazing at Ulrich over the rim of her cup as if daring him to continue.
“Woden founded the Wizards Collegium on the teaching of runic spell casting!” Ulrich sputtered.
“And Rowena founded the Witches Collegium on the teaching of witchcraft.”
“Your school isn’t even a proper school! Gels running around picking herbs, brewing them into strange potions and elixirs… It’s unnatural!”