Excerpt: Defense Mechanism

There are probably a lot more people I have no bothered to personally mention – sorry – you are just not worth the effort to write about. Everyone else in my life besides those mentioned were just passing faces that in all honesty I have no recollections of names to attach. But it is important for the rest of you to know that never did one of you pull something over on me. I saw you put those items in my locker and backpack. I heard you talk about me behind my back. I felt those paper planes hit me on the back of my head. Don’t for a second think any of you were sly or funny or even cunning.

The decision to end my life involves no second or third party.

For those who have read this – whether addressed to them or not – please try and understand. I am not a weak person who has merely given up on life. Rather I have speeded up the process of arriving to the after life. Every one will die eventually; I have just punched my ticket in before the due date. None of you will probably have any idea how hard it was to go through with this. I mean this in the literal sense. This was not a spur of the moment idea thought up doing a bad day. I had more than enough time to think about this, especially doing the time of cutting through my wrists. All I had was that stupid pink lady daisy razor. I killed myself with a pink razor decorated with plastic daisies. It took hours just break through the skin. Maybe drinking poison would have been easier or perhaps hanging myself from the ceiling fan would have a wiser choice. Too late now. Heh. Death by fruity razor, heck of a way to go.

I guess this is the part I say goodbye and just for dramatic effect I’ll say, until never again.