Socially awkward writers?

This is not the same as the introverted writer thread.

I just want to see how many of us socially awkward people are here. The ones who would love to be out going and friendly but have no idea how to start conversations or meet people. Those who tend to say the wrong thing at the the wrong time because they didn't know. Those who have lot's of acquaintances but few friends.

Those who have no social skills.

I proudly stand up and say I am part of this group. I hope I'm not alone.

I don't know how to talk to people I don't know already.

I haven't had to make friends since Elementary school, and the art has been lost on me in the intervening time. So college is a bit hard. Luckily, my roommate this year is one that I was friends with back in highschool, so it works out.

However, I have no connections in my college except for him and my girlfriend, both of whom I brought over to college. This results in rather lonely weekends, when both of them go home and I do not.

Oh, I... I wouldn't know anything about that...

I am one, too! When I was young (under 12 years old), I used to be very outgoing and had lots of friends. Then migrate across the ocean... and everything changed.

Now I am 21 (few days for 22), socially awkward, no social skills... It's been so long since my childhood, so I had forgotten that I was not always introverted as I thought.

Now I'm kind of hermit, but I think it was for "self defense". Now I got used to living this way and not bother me too much... But participating in forums and stuff like that, I think that might help. Especially in threads where we are "safe."

Haruka

I love this thread already :) I always feel extremely awkward around people, and they seem to pick up on that. It's gotten to the point where I'm shy on the internet. But! All I want to do is make friends like a seven year old. It's a bit of an issue.

Is it possible to be a socially awkward extrovert? I'm very friendly and out going, but I'm just so darn... well, crazy, that I have a hard time keeping friends. I mean, I make "friends" through work-- those customers who come in and are nice to me, especially nice to me, because they like seeing me. But as for keeping friends, poohy! It just doesn't happen. Some time after a manic episode and my "friends" run for the hills, talking smack about me, of which I hear about, and then discontinue the friendship.

As for internet friends, I've even cut them off, friends I've had from RPing a decade ago, I thought were my real friends-- even the ones I've visited in real life... I found out they had little interest in my well being. So there you have it.

I am socially awkward. If it were for my fiance and his charisma, I doubt I'd ever see another living soul in a social setting.

I was... odd when I was a child. My mom taught me to not follow the crowd, so I didn't. I had difficulty making friends, because everyone I grew up with already knew I was strange and any new kids were warned off from me pretty quickly. I did make friends, but most of them were as weird as I was, so I didn't learn all that much in terms of social interaction.

I've gotten better over the years, but I still feel awkward and out of place in most social situations where I don't know anyone or know very few people. I went to my region's kickoff party and was almost tempted to run away because it was so awkward in the beginning.

I'm a socially awkard introverted writer. High school was marked by all the dumb things I said and did at the wrong time, to the wrong people. College wasn't much better.

Once I get to know someone, I can carry on a conversation with them but it's the starting the conversation in the first place to get to know them that I fail at.

I can relate to everyone in this thread so much I don't even... blah, words.

There was, apparently, a time in my life when I was gregarious, unembarrassed, and talkative. Somewhere between then and high school, that version of me took a backseat and gave way to the version that could begin a conversation and could maybe even hold up her end of it, but only just. But that version of me seems to have taken a backseat and given way to yet a third version: the one who will spout factual information on command (need directions? I'm your woman) but beyond that cannot be induced to say a single word.

Honestly. I want to talk to people - but I don't know how. The conversation either stalls because I don't know what to say and the other person is clearly uncomfortable, or the conversation never begins because I can't bring myself to lift my voice.

I AM DRIVING MYSELF MAD.

To some posts I feel so related.

A few weeks ago, I came to University and I realized, how bad I am at making social interactions and speaking with people. I just sit there, trying not to look scared and end up looking scary to the others -.-
Actually I'm the nicest person on earth... They just won't notice!

Omg, I just had a 'IM NOT THE ONLY ONE!' euphoric moment.
Oh well, I'm not as bad as I used to be because I was very shy and was afraid of doing anything I hadn't done at least four times before. But still, I have such a hard time making friends I just don't know what on earth is wrong with me. I talk to people, I just never see them outside school or work. And it's not like I mind... Well sometimes I do because my best friend lives on the other side of the country (so doing something fun on a regular base is not really possible) but most of the time I'm fine as it is to be honest.

I'm not sure if I belong here or not, although I definitely understand how it is to feel too shy to comment! I've gotten better at commenting on here, but I don't post on any other sites, really.

My problem isn't that I say the wrong things at the wrong time - it's that I'm so afraid of saying the wrong thing that I end up not saying anything. People think I'm rude because I don't talk to them, but I only don't talk because I'm afraid and often can't think of a single thing to say anyway.

My whole life, the only friends I have are those who started talking to me first. I can talk when (usually), but I can't talk first. The only reason I have a boyfriend is because someone else set us up and then he texted me. If he and I had had to get to know each other in person instead of online, I don't think we'd be dating. We never would have made it past the first month if he weren't socially awkward, too.

I agree that being socially awkward and introverted are different. I wish I could talk to people, but I have so many issues with that. Sometimes it's mostly okay (I can, but I mostly just respond with a few words), sometimes it's, like, crippling and I just can't go up to someone and talk. I hate it.

I am probably the most socially awkward person in my state. If there was a choice between staying in my house all day every day for the rest of my life or winning a million dollars, I would happily give the money away. Being around people makes me so uncomfortable and I start to fidget. Going to get my kids from school every day pretty much gives me a panic attack! I think that's why I like writing so much. I can live vicariously through my characters. I guess that makes all my characters Mary Sue's...

Hello! I'm a fairly awkward writer. I'm not as bad as I used to be, because I can introduce myself and try to start a conversation now and the 'flee madly' line is now further away when I'm around people I don't know. I can't be comfortable unless there's at least one person I know or I'm in a place I know really well. Like, say, the NaNo forums, which lead to write-ins... I went to my first last year, and now I'm looking forward to this year's. I don't speak often. I guess I creep people out sometimes because of that. I never was very good at talking to people, but once I was introduced to instant messaging, forums, and texting I got a little better. I'm still petrified of going up to people, but I can force myself to do it.

I started writing because I was so much clearer and just, well, better when I wrote rather than letting myself trip over my tongue and end up saying things in the most awkward, stupid ways. And I had plenty of stories that deserved to be either written or drawn out, as I am an artist also. I just love to see them filling pages and being passed around and enjoyed.

I agree that introverted and social awkward are two different things, however one does not necessarily exclude the other. I am introverted and social awkward. I think I have become introverted because that is easier and then I got used to it. But I love the few times I am with friends and I would really like to experience that more often. Getting to know new people is very hard for me and it takes a very long time. With some people it's easier than with others, but most people take things too fast for me and don't give me time to catch up. So I kind of give up when I feel left behind, and walk away for myself, pretending for others and myself that it is what I want.

This is me. I have only a couple of IRL friends, neither of them writers.

I was surprised how easily I've found writing buddies here, which makes me feel bad I hadn't discovered NaNoWriMo fives years ago when I started college.

I'm definitely an introvert. And I used to be socially awkward, but then I came to the realization that nothing has to be awkward unless I make it so. I am who I am and I say what I want to say, and if someone else thinks that I'm awkward it's on them. This goes for silence too... pauses in conversation don't bother me, and if other people call them "awkward silences" that's their problem for not being comfortable with a good healthy silence!

I agree that social awkward is not the same as introverted. My parents are both introverted, yet they are great at talking in public and socializing. So while I am trying hard to get better at talking to people (eek!) and getting over the awkwardness, I will never be anything but introverted. That said, I don't think I'll ever be truly comfortable talking to people or initiating conversation, like I was as a little kid. Oh how I miss those days. Alas, my brain self-censors too much.

Me! I'm socially awkward. I didn't move across an ocean, but I found in elementary school I got along better (easier?) with my classmates, but when I got to middle school, things happened to me and I started withdrawing. I have moved a lot, and I simply think that the social ability button is somewhere hidden, deactivated and/or lost. I just... can't. I don't know how. I want to make friends on a face-to-face level, but I can't seem to. I never know what to say. I'm strange.

Oh well... I make friends better online I think.