Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Molly_Cule — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 15:39:23 -0500

They're out there messing up the protagonist's world and you hate them for it. Which characters have had you screaming into the pages in outright disgust or just plain indignation?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Circe Marda — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 19:48:41 -0500

Dolores Umbridge. I have never screamed so much at a book as I have at Order of the Phoenix. I even ended up throwing my book across the room at one point. Also, Holden Caulfield. Not an antagonist, I know, but I read Catcher in the Rye all the way through and just hated him by the end. I just couldn't stand his over dramatic whining. There must be something wrong with me because everyone I met just loves Holden. I don't know, man.

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sweet_disposition — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 19:56:51 -0500

I came in here to say Holden Caulfield! Seriously, he's so annoying.

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Circe Marda — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:04:42 -0500

I feel like I should be your best friend just because I have never found anyone that agrees with me. Coming of age, my ass. Spoiled rotten little brat who takes everything for granted and thinks he's life is so tough. Hipster in training.

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Trethsparr — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:14:32 -0500

Joffrey Lannister of A Song of Ice and Fire.

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Trethsparr — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:14:58 -0500

Seconding the Umbridge, fo' sho.

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adorable fluffy kittens — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:16:33 -0500

Clare from The Time Traveler's Wife. Just... ergh. I wound up dropping the book on the ground and stomping on it, I was so frustrated with her. ...which, as it turns out, is a very unpopular opinion amongst my friends. Lolwhoops.

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SetsunaSakamoto — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:38:20 -0500

I agree with you! I hate Holden Caulfield too! He's so whiny and annoying. Not to mention I hated that book...

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SetsunaSakamoto — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:39:11 -0500

Does it HAVE to be a protagonist? Cause I'd love to punch Bella Swan in the face. Rose Tyler as well.

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Allura_Darkelf — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 20:43:16 -0500

Edward Cullen and Isabella Swan. Seriously, they get on my last nerve.

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Immortal Obscurity — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 21:33:19 -0500

1. Dolores Umbridge: I hated her sooooo much, that I just had to put the book down before I punched my sister (the closest person to me at the time) in the face... Turns out, she was feeling the exact same way. 2. Edward Cullen: Vampires are supposed to suck blood, not... Uh, never mind. 3. Bella Swan. The book didn't give the readers enough info on her personality... because she has none. 4. Emo dude from my main novel/ last year's NaNo. Marian, I like you... But please, stop writing crappy love-poetry and referring to yourself as the Emperor of Evil. Oh, and comparing your life to an MCR song is NOT cute- would it kill you to smile, and lay off the vodka, for once? (His answers: yes, and oh, hell, yes... in that order!) 5. Bryan Bianchi, from The Perfect Cut: All I know about you is that you cut yourself. That's all fine and well, except that you annoy me, have no personality, and are possibly the worst protagonist in a non-fantasy novel... Please tell your author that she half-assed it, and to do her research next time. - That's how I roll! Peace, El Veeb/I.O.

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Almira Torralba — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 21:36:35 -0500

Bella Swan and Edward Cullen take the cake for sure. I can't even get past a few pages of any of the Twilight books without screaming. As for Holden Caulfield, I understand him but I can just barely tolerate him. Maybe being a psych major has allowed me to retain some semblance of feeling for this sod. Other noteworthy characters: -Julien Sorel and Mathilde De La Mole from "Le Rouge et Noir". Bratty, overly entitled social climbers who love to manipulate the world around them -Thenardier from "Les Miserables". He's a heartless crook who doesn't mind stealing from everyone, doesn't care when his wife and two of his kids are dead, has no qualms about selling off his youngest children, etc....the list goes on. And while we are also on the topic of "Les Miserables", Felix Tholomyes also should be mentioned. This guy pretty much abandoned Fantine and Cosette in Paris...and Cosette was hardly even two years old! -Eustacia Vye from "Return of the Native". What a user. The other characters in this awful book aren't much better. -Anna Wynne from "A Venetian Affair". Actually the trouble is that she really existed, AND really did mess up her daughter's life as well as the lives of several other people connected to her.

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Sarcasmohjoy — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 23:13:59 -0500

Bella Swan is the whiniest little biotch. Umbridge. Bellatrix Lestrange Draco Malfoy (I wanted to punch him when he called Herm a mudblood!)

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jazzi-bear — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 23:26:30 -0500

Seconding Edward Cullen, because that is the only reasonable reaction to someone ripping the engine from his girlfriend's car. The. Only. One.

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Inkling Dreams — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 23:41:02 -0500

I third this! Edward is just a creepy, controlling, stalkerish freak. And Bella has about as much personality as the cardboard cutout I saw of her at the mall the other day. In fact, the cutout just may have more personality than the character.

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IsBreaLiomCaife — Thu, 20 Oct 2011 23:51:49 -0500

I'm a fourth on the Caulfield brat. I threw that book out a third story window and spent the entire assignment to read it wishing he'd commit suicide and that the rest would be a very, very detailed description of his funeral.

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walker13 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 00:26:51 -0500

Yeah, that car engine part scene had me biting my nails. Mark Oshiro (the Mark Reads guy) was right when he said that he honestly expected that car part to end up in her forehead. Frickin' creepy.

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walker13 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 00:31:57 -0500

Stupid-face Umbridge. It takes me two to three times longer to get through Order of the Phoenix when I read the series; I keep putting it down due to rage issues. *drops certain profanity terms* Ugh. Never hated a character that much. I even prefer Voldemort; at least he's *outright* evil. Definitely chiming in on the Edward/Bella hate. Edward's a stalker, Bella's a whiner, and Jacob got character-raped halfway through so I can't even like him in the beginning parts of the series. The fact that ANY of these people are supposed to be looked up to is absolutely terrifying to me.

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Argentum — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 00:34:33 -0500

Renesmee annoyed me WAY more than either Bella or Edward. Never thought I could hate a baby, but... she's the ultimate Mary Sue, imho-- perfectly beautiful, incredibly talented, with all the benefits of vampirism and none of the drawbacks, loved by everyone around her, selfless, smarter than adults even as a baby, etc. etc., plus the entire plot of Breaking Dawn part deux is basically Bad Guys wanting to destroy the obviously harmless Renesmee for no reason, then getting won over, as well. Deep breath. Okay, other than the entire cast of Twilight, I wouldn't mind punching: - Rachel White from Emily Giffin's Something Borrowed -- worst. friend. ever. - Tess of the d'Urbervilles from Thomas Hardy's eponymous novel -- spent the first 54 chapters wanting to slap the fatalistic passivity out of this pure woman - John Perkins in his autobiography Confessions of an Economic Hitman -- self-absorbed prick - Jaenelle from Anne Bishop's Black Jewels series -- supposedly the lead FMC, but as far as I could tell the only thing Jaenelle did was get raped, and then sort of think people to death with powers that she did not work for and did nothing to deserve, apart from being born female and Witch. Tess of the d'Urbervilles in a world that was at least overflowing with sexy, plot-driving men. (Okay, maybe I'm just jealous that Daemon loved Jaenelle.) This is getting long, so I'll stop. Looks like most of mine ARE the protagonists-- wish they would quit messing up the world of all the decent supporting characters :)

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boysloveboys — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 03:31:50 -0500

Both, pretty much word for word. I also threw OotP across the room. LOL No one else I run into seems to share the same burning hate I have for Holden Caulfield and Catcher in the Rye. I remember we were all hyped up to read it back in high school and I turned out to be the only one who wanted to reach into the book and straight up murder that moron. Ah, just talking about this is making my blood effing boil. D<

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boysloveboys — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 03:32:34 -0500

SERIOUSLY! I would've liked the book a little bit if it ended that way.

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Eunoia — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 04:56:18 -0500

I had to read Mini Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella last year (I had to attempt reading it a few times before I finally forced myself to) and I wanted to strangle Becky Brandon. I hate shopping and I'm pretty stingy with money so I was expecting to hate the book, but this Becky character, oh dear, she has no sense at all. The plot is she's throwing a surprise party for her husband while a financial crisis is going on yet she still wants to splash out and stuff. Plus, she can't even look after her own daughter who she spoils. HATEHATEHATE. There must be other characters but that's all I can think of right now.

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popsprocket — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 06:01:13 -0500

Egwene al'Vere from The Wheel of Time. Seriously. She is the biggest bitch. Everyone else that came into power from their humble beginnings have been good about it but she's just living up to the reputation of her position. When the last book gets released I seriously hope some takes her down at least 10 pegs. She's NOT the most powerful person in the world (in more ways than one) and needs to be taught a god damned lesson. How can you be the only character that started out level headed and then went BACKWARDS through character development. Shits me off it does.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

1000J50 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 07:39:30 -0500

huh... I always thought that was sort of the point of Holden Caulfield- that he was a generic annoying teenager who was just as silly and hypocritical as the adults he was criticizing. Definitely a punchable character though.

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ptrst — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 08:55:38 -0500

I'd much rather call the police. Abusive jerkface.

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Circe Marda — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 09:12:23 -0500

I think it was the original purpose and I can appreciate that, but it seems so overdone. And maybe it's just me, but it also seems like other readers put Holden on a pedestal, like he's the epitome of teenage rebellion and insight and all that and they should all aspire to be like him. Honestly, I couldn't even see the irony in the character because the entire book annoyed me as a whole.

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Unwritten — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 09:26:23 -0500

Edward Cullen. Because, really. Umbridge. I swear, my blood pressure went up with every little "hem-hem" she made. Mr. Rochester. I was fine with him until it turned out he had his wife locked up in the attic.

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Almira Torralba — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 09:35:07 -0500

Mr. Rochester is bad. But I think Mrs. Reed is so much worse. Oh and adding to previous list, a character I forgot: Eragon. What an entitled, know-it-all, and DANGEROUS man. I lost all sympathy for him in the second book.

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paperpages — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 10:01:37 -0500

Hilly Holbrook. But I think Minny's 'terrible awful' was a much more appropriate and altogether satisfying punishment.

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Kaleidoscope27 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 10:07:12 -0500

I recently downloaded a free book on my Kindle and badly wanted to smack the two main female characters heads together. Over and over again. They were so freakin' irritating!

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Ashton_Lee — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 10:13:55 -0500

Cersei Lannister. Her POV annoys me to death and I just want Jaime to come and strangle her already. Or whatever. Stannis could give her to R'hllor.

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hootowl — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 11:38:38 -0500

Umbridge annoyed me, but Harry was worse. I barely made it through the book. Maybe it's because I don't remember being an angsty teenager.

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hootowl — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 11:41:52 -0500

second that!

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hootowl — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 11:46:31 -0500

I read the first Twilight novel and half of the second before I decided enough was enough. I'd never get back those eight hours. Fortunately, I was reading them at work (on breaks of course!) so my precious off hours weren't ruined. I loathe the Twilight series. I can't think of any characters that haven't already been mentioned though I think I'm the only one who couldn't stand Harry Potter in the Order of the Phoenix. Umbridge was annoying, but she was supposed to be. She was perfectly loathsome.

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Demagis — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 11:48:29 -0500

So. Many. But Leesha from The Warded Man by Peter V Brett is probably the most recent ones I want to strangle to death. She's amazing at everything and everyone loves her, even the god-damn villain. It's infuriating. It's a shame, because other than that the series is fairly solid.

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jjsigford — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 11:48:40 -0500

Well, I was planning on reading this book but now maybe I won't. Also, I almost through the last Harry Potter book out a third story window, but then I realized that it was not mine and my friend would slaughter me if I did.

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Hype — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:04:04 -0500

I would punch almost every character in Twilight right in the face. Twice.

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Hype — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:42:57 -0500

Quentin Coldwater. I pretty much want to punch all of the main characters of The Magicians in the face. Snobby, whiney, and thoughtless bunch of brats, seriously.

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SetsunaSakamoto — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:43:01 -0500

I'm going to have to completely disagree with you on that one... While I do think he was bratty in the beginning and he tended to try to do things he obviously couldn't for the sake of looking cool or impressing Arya, he's gotten a lot better. He now realises that he doesn't know everything and he probably never will, no matter how old he gets. He's developed a deeply ingrained appreciation for the value of life, which is something that most never achieve. And of course he's dangerous, he's got a dragon that he never asked for. He's been FORCED to become dangerous, originally against his will. Now he's fighting for the sake of helping everyone because he actually CAN do something about it. That's much better than sitting back and letting it happen.

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SetsunaSakamoto — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:44:48 -0500

Oh no, I couldn't stand him either. I found him to be extremely annoying. And emo. "Why won't anyone tell me anything? Whine, complain, blah blah blah..." He couldn't just sit down and think. "You know... They're keeping information from me because they don't want me to die. I think that's a good reason."

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Elyndra — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:50:15 -0500

I completely agree, I always have to struggle through most of the book. (It gets a bit better towards the end.) Maybe it’s because I never really was the angry teenager that I have a hard time associating with it, but I always feel like telling him to grow up and just deal with it.

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jillains — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 13:39:57 -0500

Finny from A Separate Peace by John Knowles. I had to read that book in High School. My classmates and I routinely called it A Separate Piece of Crap. I hated Finny's arrogance and wanted to punch him (especially at the beginning of the book).

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Circe Marda — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 13:53:18 -0500

I agree. Harry was extremely annoying in the fifth book. After I got past the Umbridge hate, I started to find that Harry was just the epitome of angsty teenage brat. In some ways, it was perfect: he went through that phase. But to see him be more mature in the fourth book than the fifth was irritating.

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just ashley — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 13:54:19 -0500

OMG I feel the same way too. If a book could become physical living being like in the movie "The pagemaster" I would punch the living daylights out of the 4th book.

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boysloveboys — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 14:10:58 -0500

This is a big reason why I hate him, actually. When our class finished the book I was thoroughly disgusted by what a jackass he was and yet everyone else had stars in their eyes. I was like, are you f---ing kidding me?

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Allura_Darkelf — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 15:06:22 -0500

If this were an Authors you would most like to punch in the face forum, I would say Stephanie Meyer for ruining vampires for the next century or so.

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akizakura — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 15:59:51 -0500

Harry drove me nuts in the seventh book. It took me a long time to get through because the first half of the book, he was just obnoxious. But I s'pose wondering in the woods being hunted would make anyone cranky...

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bohemiangrl316 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 16:06:27 -0500

I agree! Actually...every single Lannister except Tyrion. I love Tyrion.

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Sam M — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 16:11:15 -0500

Scarlett O'Hara. She manipulates people and ruins the lives of everyone around her for her own selfish goals. She's not a strong female lead, she's a spoiled brat.

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thatollie — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:02:26 -0500

I have always wanted to punch Tom Sawyer in the face.

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fictionalboyfriend — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 18:08:01 -0500

Hamlet. Judge all you like.

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J.Kievsky — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 20:53:22 -0500

Your post made me laugh so hard, that was my reaction exactly. Every time he would go on and on about how he should kill himself I was screaming at him in my head, "So stop whining and DO IT ALREADY"

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J.Kievsky — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:05:28 -0500

Besides Holden Caulfield, I would also like to nominate Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights. I don't remember why, exactly, it was so many years ago, but every time I see the book on the shelf my hands ball into fists and I get angry at someone who is a) not real, b) a jerkface, c) totally not worth the energy expended on so much hatred.

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inkinmyblood — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:16:14 -0500

Bella Swan. Because...well, I believe the text speaks for itself. "I only realized I was sobbing when Alice...pulled me into her lap." -Bella Swan "What's this moisture? OMG I'm melting! Oh, crying. Right." Never before have I seen a character more bewildered by her own body. She's hardly conscious through most of the series, I swear.

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WileJ — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:38:57 -0500

Ellie from Isla Bick's Ashes ... actually, all of them from the book, but Ellie specifically. Agreed with all the Twilight characters, but I'll blame that on the writing of the books being terrible. Gale from Hunger Games, specifically in Mockingjay And Jace (though this would be a bad idea, but he drives me insane in a bad way) from Mortal Instruments. Ooh, finally Susan from the Narnia books. She's such a Debbie Downer all the time.

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WileJ — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:39:52 -0500

How about all of them from the book? I still can't figure out why so many people actually like the book. I had to read it twice in high school and it was torture all the way through. Heathcliff is dreadful.

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Unwritten — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:47:48 -0500

I can't believe I forgot about Mrs. Reed! That woman is horrible. >_<

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Skunktail17 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:49:47 -0500

REALLY! What a whiner! I can't either imagine how anyone could even like him, let alone idolize him! Your life sucks because you got kicked out of boarding school? Go do something about it! Don't just get drunk and wander around complaining about it! I had such high hopes too. I read it right after I quit high school (to homeschool), so I thought I'd really identify with it. WRONG.

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Skunktail17 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:55:09 -0500

Maybe that's why I never liked Renesmee. And the fact that her name sucks. I enjoyed the first three Twilight books when I read them (for some reason that I do not understand now), but I've always disliked Breaking Dawn.

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Skunktail17 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 21:57:10 -0500

Oh my gosh yes. I only saw the movie, but it was so good I want to read the book.

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walker13 — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 23:21:55 -0500

I also love that Bella has apparently never heard of adblock software or even Google. (I adore the Mark Reads Twilight recaps. Only real reason I completed the series.)

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Almira Torralba — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 23:34:24 -0500

I still can't quite forgive him for what happened to Elva. Poor child. Hope Paolini finds a way of fixing that issue.

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Almira Torralba — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 23:36:12 -0500

I remember my high school friends screaming at Hamlet, "Just KILL Claudius already!!" And boy I howled triumphantly when during a production of Hamlet, during the "Get Thee to A Nunnery" scene, Hamlet was really hassling Ophelia and she drew a knife on him.

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flowerdrumsong — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 05:56:44 -0500

Lizzie Bennet anyone? Mostly in part two of the novel. She was just clueless yet thought she was so smart and observant. I'm all for female independence as well, but a lot of the things that came of her mouth were downright mean, worse than some of the quips from Mr. Darcy. Luckily, she DID grow up and lose some of that haughtiness.

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Tale Spinner — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 08:13:35 -0500

For me, Heathcliff AND Catherine Linton (the first Catherine). She was such a spoiled, selfish, self-centered thing. John Thorpe, too, from Northanger Abbey.

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Almira Torralba — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 09:04:41 -0500

Lizzie can be caustic, but her mother is downright embarrassing, Mr. Collins is obsequious, Lady Catherine is a horror, and Wickham is worthy of a place in "Top Cads of Classical Literature". As much as I love "Pride and Prejudice", I cringe at half the cast.

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Hype — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 09:12:50 -0500

I hate Gale in Mockingjay, ugh.

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sardonica — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 09:19:47 -0500

Sebastian Dangerfield from The Ginger Man. FFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU I've never encountered a worse character in all the hundreds of other books I've read.

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paperpages — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 13:19:48 -0500

Do it! It is excellent. I read the book first and was very pleased with the movie adaptation. Just the amazingness of her POV shifts alone...wow. And the way the voice changes when she switches from the maids to Skeeter. It's an incredible study in writing technique as well as an absolutely wonderful story.

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subtlemelodrama — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 14:30:59 -0500

Romeo, from Romeo and Juliet. Yeah, him. Spoiled little rich kid, and he's fickle too. Idiot.

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KatrinasForest — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 16:29:37 -0500

Eragon. Especially in the last scene of the first book when he goes all whiny because he's got a scar on his back and he's not perfect anymore. Me: "You think your back looks bad? You should see what I'm about to do your face!" Eragon: *too distracted about his scar to notice reality* I never hated Renesmee -- it wasn't her fault she only existed as a plot device. And she never narrated, which already put her way ahead of Bella in my book.

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Trethsparr — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 17:33:07 -0500

Tyrion is boss. :)

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Trethsparr — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 17:33:36 -0500

Word.

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fictionalboyfriend — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 00:29:59 -0500

...that's amazing. I wish I'd been there to see it.

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S.A. Hollow — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 00:38:58 -0500

Linden from the Thomas Covenant series. *shudder* Ugh, I just can't stand her!

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britthatsit — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 01:35:43 -0500

I second that. Every time I got to a scene with him in it I just wanted someone to beat his face to a bloody pulp - good writing, ftw!

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Inoru no Hoshi — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 03:06:49 -0500

Hm, she is a spoiled, scheming, manipulating brat - that's the nature of a girl who literally has her every whim catered to before disaster - in this case, the Civil War - strikes. For all that, though, I have to argue that she is strong - just not necessarily mature. The only out and out spoiling of anyone's life I can think of is when she marries Frank Kennedy, who was engaged to her sister, Suellen. And even that was done with more a mind to taking care of her family the only way she knew how: money for the necessities, and a strong, stubborn will to hold everyone together and make it work. So - spoiled, yes, very much so, and she clings to it as a state of familiarity in the midst of everything else and really, honestly, does not realize how much she's screwed up (most tellingly, in my mind, her marriage with Rhett) by outright refusing to grow until the end of the novel, when Melanie dies. (It doesn't help anything that gentlemen were raised to pamper their ladies - even Rhett, for all his scallawag nature, definitely indulged Scarlett to ridiculous degrees, and he had the most spine out of all the main males mentioned in the novel.) In the end, I have to say that Scarlett was very human and did her best, which may not live up to everyone else's concept of "doing one's best".

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Beccah — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 06:34:20 -0500

100% agreed on Joffrey! Never before have I wanted to slap somebody so much!

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PaigeResig — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 11:27:55 -0500

I would agree with that!! I would punch her for making vampires sparkly and whiney and I would totally punch Isabella Swan straight in the nose. And then kick her shins.

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Trina — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 12:09:43 -0500

ALL of the characters from Jane Eyre! I loathe that book and cannot even look at it without shuddering. Prospero in The Tempest. I mean, really. Uncle Andrew in The Magician's Nephew Ichabod Crane

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OwlyCreature — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 12:32:27 -0500

Always loathed the twerp. Glad someone else feels the same!

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Katsuno_Hitomi — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 12:32:36 -0500

I think the only Twilight character I don't want to punch is Bella's dad, Charlie.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

OwlyCreature — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 12:34:03 -0500

Jadis, the White Witch from the Chronicles of Narnia. I cannot describe the white-hot fury the creature induces even now, rereading the books as an adult.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

OwlyCreature — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 12:38:30 -0500

Uncle Andrew was a yucky creepy old man. But he seems to have become a kinder, gentler and wiser person in his old age... Really, I always found him too ridiculous to punch-- the whole being planted and caged and crawling around muttering about brandy thing was a very fitting punishment I thought. It had the added benefit of being entirely his own doing as well. The Lion knew best, as usual :)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 16:08:42 -0500

When I saw the title of this thread, Holden was the first to come to mind. And HARRY too! From book 5 on I hated him so much. I guess it really is the whiny teenager problem.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 16:09:08 -0500

Seconded!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 16:13:25 -0500

There is another problem I have that makes me hate a LOT of lit fic characters: class consciousness. Basically anyone rich, white, and usually male makes me want to kill them. Every Updike character, every Bret Easton Ellis character, every Salinger character. They are all whiny, obnoxious, egotistical alcoholics, who unsurprisingly treat each other like crap and think their superior intellect will somehow redeem them. But it doesn't. Also every Dickens character is either an unlikable brat or a total monster. Usually the Austen characters, while surrounded by the trappings of the rich, are saved for me by their wit and that they are usually in a pretty precarious financial position. I know it's weird.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

kcde — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 19:28:03 -0500

Oh, God, I remember reading one of the Shopaholic books and just wanting to throw it across the room. SO ANNOYING.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

kcde — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 19:29:23 -0500

After reading through all the responses, am I the only one who totally LOVED Umbridge? I mean, she's so terrible and awful and evil and IT'S AMAZING.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Chaotic_Disillusion — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 20:17:29 -0500

Always Holden Caulfield. Every moment of that book and every moment since. You are not alone, I share your fiery loathing.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Rubyfruit — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 23:32:41 -0500

The entire cast of Left Behind. Especially Rayford Steele and Cameron "Buck" Williams. The former for being creepy, and the latter for having a stupid nickname that he insists that everyone calls him. And both their names sound like porn names, which is the only awesome thing about this series. That and the unintentional homoerotic subtext coming from a book written by two Evangelical Christians. But yeah, the entire cast, protagonists for being completely horrible people, the antagonist for being overwhelmingly underwhelming, and the background characters for acting like no one would if the world they knew suddenly went topsy-turvy on them in the form of all the children in the world disappearing.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Phantos — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 00:04:59 -0500

Joining the Holden Caulfield HATE club! Everyone's always all "Oh, Catcher in the Rye is so good, it's such a classic, everyone should read it, blah blah blah." Screw that. If I didn't respect books so much, I'd have burned the damn thing when I was done.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

martianlunatic — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 00:55:55 -0500

lol I loved Umbridge too, as a bad guy -- I mean, I wanted to punch her in the face, but that's kind of the point of her character, isn't it?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Allura_Darkelf — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 01:26:08 -0500

I think she may have gotten her fairy tale creatures confused. I think she meant "fairy" not "vampire". Or better yet, mermaid.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

braids — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 04:07:27 -0500

Katniss' mother at the end of Mockingjay. Seriously. I wanted to punch Mrs. Everdeen into oblivion.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Almira Torralba — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 04:19:22 -0500

Oh yes. A friend of my father said it was a 'feminist moment' in Shakespearean theater.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Trina — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 07:29:19 -0500

Uncle Andrew was ridiculous, but he creeped me out so much as a kid....I had nightmares about him. The original drawings of him, too, were so well done, they made him seem like a spider. He scared me much more than Jadis, though. Much more.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

firebird_ysa — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:09:40 -0500

I couldn't finish it because he annoyed me so much.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

firebird_ysa — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:11:11 -0500

I always thought Renesmee sounded like a genital disease you needed a cream for.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

OwlyCreature — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:35:34 -0500

Haha! He does look like a spider in the Baynes illustrations! A mop-top spider in an ill-fitting jacket....

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

firebird_ysa — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 10:47:18 -0500

I've spent YEARS trying to remember what that movie was! I saw it when I was little, but no-one else would believe me it's real, or has heard of it! THANK YOU!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

firebird_ysa — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 11:00:24 -0500

Ginny Weasley... I alternated between feeling sorry she didn't get the author-love that the rest of her family did, and get developed in the same manner, and getting really pissed off by the way she kept sauntering in, being sassy, and wandering off again to make us think she was cool. It really wound me up. She was created for one purpose, you knew that from damn near the start, and she never really became much more than that.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

hootowl — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:10:40 -0500

i thought she was perfectly horrible. she was the villain in the book after all.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

callistos_angel — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:31:58 -0500

Seconding Bella for sure.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

callistos_angel — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:35:35 -0500

I... I think I love you. I wanted to beat the everliving crap out of her...

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

callistos_angel — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:36:37 -0500

I have to add my own character to this. Rebecca Ann Hague - Written to be a whiny little bitch but MY GOD is she ever so much worse than I expected. I hate her so much I plan to murder her brutally in the next ST:NOVA book.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

braids — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 20:25:05 -0500

I think I love you for agreeing with me! I've never really ranted about it because everyone was so up in arms about Gale, but at least his ending made sense. Mrs. Everdeen made me want to stab my eyes, rip out my hair and scream until my ears bled.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Sam M — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 22:19:53 -0500

It's been a while since I read it, but isn't she responsible for Frank's death, too? She ends up having the KKK fight for her honor after she purpously puts herself in danger and he dies, while Ashley is seriously injured. Then she obsesses over Ashley, leading to a scandal and huge fight between his sister and wife. Being oblivious to the possible consequences of your actions and doing whatever you want doesn't make you strong, it makes you stupid. Being strong would be if she maturely weighed the possible outcomes and then did what was necessary with the least amount of damage. She just does whatever she wants without any thought of what could happen, and then afterwards..."oops." And those are just the big things, nevermind all the stupid things she does day-to-day.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

C. Heidt — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 23:11:35 -0500

I am a Twilight hater. I know this is pretty much as cliche as being a Twilight lover, but there you have it. So pretty much anyone in that series. And yes, I have read the entire thing because I felt that I couldn't properly judge it unless I did. Other than that, and I might catch some hate for this, Katniss Everdeen. She went from being a BAMF to being a complete basket case. Yes, I KNOW she went through a lot, but she went through a lot and DIDN'T become a basket case, too, and I guess I feel like she just kind of gave up. And we didn't even get to see that transformation. It just happened between two books. So Katniss, yeah. There are probably more, but that's all that came to mind right away.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Arisajr — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:15:24 -0500

No I felt that way too, all the characters in that book sort of bothered me there was a scene of perfection about the characters which I didn't line

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Arisajr — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:16:02 -0500

YES

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Arisajr — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:19:42 -0500

Yes. His so annoying. I once got kicked out of an English class cause I dared to say that I thought it wasn't love but lust, what a thought lust. Uch that whole play annoys me especially the way it was taught in my high school

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Arisajr — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:21:37 -0500

going to put it out there marius from les miserables. he is such an annoying character. I mean he is just so annoying to the point where i really want to punish him

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

OwlyCreature — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 00:53:01 -0500

They're a bit more receptive in college to ideas on love vs. lust. I got good marks on an essay slamming whatsisface from Camile, the selfish abusive jerk. Romeo and Juliet has some lovely writing, ideas and characters in it. I just can't stand the central adolescent angst of the story... just imagine what a little patience and communication might have wrought!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Almira Torralba — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 01:39:17 -0500

I don't blame you. I still have a hard time stomaching some of the stuff he did. But I chalk it up to his being generally clueless, aimless and a bit of a brat. Can't help it considering the way he was raised.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Pashleyy — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 01:41:01 -0500

Allie and Noah from The Notebook. No, in fact, ALL of Nicolas Spark's novels. I really just kind of want to curb-stomp him into the ground. That's not too graphic, is it?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

just ashley — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 03:09:35 -0500

Welcome. I always have to bring up IMDB so people wont think I am crazy.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Eunoia — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:11:32 -0500

I know! And there's a series?! HOW, IT'S SO ANNOYING.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

DaxBenny — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:55:04 -0500

So much Twilight hate. I didn't hate the character. Actually that ended up being accidentally brilliant on Meyers part, it provided a completely blank vessel for the reader to put themselves in, hence why every tween girl loved it. That said I didn't make it in the book more than a chapter because I couldn't stand her writing. And I can't believe I'm the only one who's wanted to punch Harry Potter. Seriously in a few of the middle books he does a stint as a whiny emo kid ungrateful for everything. Welcome to puberty, get over it you can do magic and you're famous. Katniss in The Hunger Games, but I think that's how the character is written. I like the books but characters are so hateable. On second thought that might actually contribute to why I like the books. Overall I'd say I dislike protagonists more than antagonists.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:57:11 -0500

You're not the only one! There are some folks upthread who agree, the comments are just nested under others I think.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

DaxBenny — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 10:58:01 -0500

[quote=Hype] I hate Gale in Mockingjay, ugh. [/quote] I actually liked Gale. I knew how that whole aspect of the story was going to go but I thought he was an enjoyable character all the way through until the last chapter/epilogue.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

DaxBenny — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 11:03:04 -0500

[quote=hootowl] i thought she was perfectly horrible. she was the villain in the book after all. [/quote] I literally was thinking of the exact phrase "perfectly horrible." She is, shes just the most spiteful, vile, cruel, woman who happens to be shrouded in pink frills and kittens.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Kiara_ — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 11:45:41 -0500

Mia Thermopolis I liked her in the movies but in the books? I just wanted to smack her in the face and than strangle her! Annoyed the hell out of me! I couldn't even finish the series even though I usually like Meg Cabot's style... And of course: Bella and Edward. Never figured out why they are so popular. Yet. I still have time 'cause I'm young... Just in my twenties, right guys? ;]

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Inoru no Hoshi — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 12:57:00 -0500

The fight between Melly and Honey Wilkes is as much Honey's fault for being a snide, gossipy bitch as it is Scarlett's fault for clinging to a teenage crush that's largely unrequited and one of the last things that's been a constant factor in her life for years. People do similar things all the time - like I said, she's very human, and very much a product of her times and upbringing. As for Frank's death-- I would not lable that as Scarlett's fault. She didn't ask him to go after the squatters that were going to rob - and possibly do worse - her. She was, in fact, very much in shock over the whole thing and just wanted him to comfort her, IIRC. (I'm not sure where our copy of the book is, so I can't go double check this, sorry!) It was his decision, born out of his upbringing that a lady, especially one's wife, ought to be protected and defended. That he chose to do so in the way he did led to his death. Simple as that. (He could have, if he'd swallowed his pride, gone to the Army still occupying Atlanta. Or ignored it. Any number of things that just did not cross is mind due to the combination of upbringing and the social atmosphere of the era.) Ultimately, yes, she probably shouldn't have tried to go to the mill she was, IIRC, coming back from. Are you going to fault her for wanting to check up on her business? For not knowing how bad the situation re: squatters was? (There is, incidentally, pretty much no way she would have known. She's not (at this point) connected with the Yankees (specifically the Army) or the societal circles that might have known, and if the men in her life had been aware of it, they would not have discussed it with her present. That is a fact of the era.)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Safira — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:17:28 -0500

Ohmigaw, please tell me there is footage of this somewhere on the internet! I love it when actors subvert scenes with small actions!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Safira — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:21:46 -0500

Nope, not weird. I feel that way too. In fact, I refuse to read Hemingway because his privilege oozes through ever word of every scene and character.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Safira — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:24:36 -0500

Seriously! KATNISS FINALLY NEEDS YOU AND YOU ABANDON HER FOREVER! Aaaaaaauuuugh! My mother (who does NOT read dystopia, but ate up HG anyway) and I ranted about her for HOURS.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hael — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:27:49 -0500

*cackle* That was about my reaction. My vampire novel I have been working on for eight years is now unsellable, because it has "good" vampires... and thus everyone is going to think Twilight. Ok, just because my vampires are on the humans' side doesn't mean they won't eat them the second they have a chance!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Safira — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:42:16 -0500

I'll join you. Sparks' relationships are all pretty unhealthy.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Allura_Darkelf — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 16:45:34 -0500

A lot of people are having that problem now. My English prof couldn't publish anything because of her.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

JGHarris — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:16:11 -0500

It's funny, when I read Wuthering Heights I get so mad and realize that I genuinely dislike most of the characters in it, but at the end of the day it's one of my favourite books. Maybe I'm a masochist. Anyway, I'd like to add Linton Heathcliff to the list of 'Characters from Wuthering Heights Who Piss Me Off'. I mean, I know he's just a kid and he's sick and his situation is messed up, but dammit if I didn't want to introduce him to the back of my hand on more than one occasion.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

JGHarris — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:29:52 -0500

I agree with this, although even he started to grind my gears in the last book. If I had a child and thought that they were into something weird, I'd want the damn details. I thought his whole TMI act was a bit off-putting.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Kandiman — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:30:03 -0500

Harry Potter. Seriously, lock us in a room and all the magic in the world couldn't save him. there are a few of the Scarpetta books where, depending who's being the biggest ass ths time around, I could happily punch Marino or Benton.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Knight of Disorder — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:51:52 -0500

Any main character that saves the world without any support system. For that matter any main character that somehow in the course of a week single handed attempts to take down some major portion of the government, get's caught and locked in some super secure facility just to escape through the air ducts and succeed in taking down said portion of the government. I really want to punch in the face the main character that DIES and then suddenly due to some strange magic or science comes back to life.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hobbit Missa — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 17:54:47 -0500

Sansa Stark in the Game of Thrones. I came to like her a bit more later in the series, but I love Arya and just thinking that she should punch her big sis in the nose. Also every Lannister except Tyrion. Shae. I hate her for betraying Tyrion. (sorry if that was a spoiler to anyone). Anyone who ever messes with my dwarf. Because he's just freakin' awesome!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Jhinnua — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 19:06:36 -0500

I don't remember this book at all... but if I remember correctly, I totally agree. XD

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Aaviela — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 08:32:27 -0500

Tess? Meh. Angel, on the other hand, whoooo boy would I do lots and lots and lots of punching. I think he's one of my absolute most loathed characters of all time.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Ellen G — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 08:57:45 -0500

Don't get me wrong, I loved Katniss in HG. But every book after that made me want to punch her and Peeta. So yeah. Gale ftw <3

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Ellen G — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 09:01:03 -0500

Umbridge. Fudge. Lupin in the last book (SO NOT IN-CHARACTER FOR HIM GRRR). Bella. /end obvious answers

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

MysteriousFlower — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 10:52:32 -0500

Ronald Weasley. I swear to God that lad was purely created to irritate me. I have never seen a more immature, selfish, unintelligent, underdeveloped and jealous character in my whole life!!!! Ok, done with the Ron hate but I swear his character in the Harry Potter books (as well as the movies) is hard to like.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

True Blue Fool — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 11:51:12 -0500

Definitely Edward Cullen. In fact, that's how I describe the books to anyone who asks: I want to punch Edward Cullen in the face.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

fairyydust — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 11:53:28 -0500

Thenardier ftw. He was a huge jackass. I could barely even read the scene where he's basically stealing from Valjean.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

fairyydust — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 11:56:31 -0500

I don't have a problem with Mr. Rochester...I mean...you have to consider the time. His wife is clearly absolutely CRAZY, and divorce was out of the question. It was keep her locked up or, obviously, be murdered in his sleep... Mrs. Reed should be shot, however. That woman disgusts me.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

fairyydust — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 12:01:31 -0500

I think the whole point of the novel, and why many people love it, is that the characters are all so horrible, that their only redeeming qualities is the depth of their love for eachother? Particularly Heathcliff and Cathy. That's just me, though.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

fairyydust — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 12:19:08 -0500

I actually found Ron really well-developed? He's the youngest son, but not the youngest of the family, and pretty much never gets any undivided attention, nor does he get to do anything his brothers haven't done first...to me, his jealousy and occasional selfishness made sense, especially as after being the neglected son for years (imagine being born after Fred and George?), he goes on to become best friends with somebody who will ALWAYS upstage him and have the focus taken away from him, even by his own parents. I think people often forget that the oldest these characters are in the books are seventeen/eighteen, and at that point it would still make sense that Ron is not fully mature...most people aren't until at least twenty-one, and even then I have my doubts. Anyways, I just felt the need to defend him because he's my favourite. You are, of course, entitled to your opinion. 8D

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 13:55:49 -0500

And for trying to convince girls that the truest love is always with controlling abusive jerks. Who will still make you wait until marriage for sex.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

monquito — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 14:04:10 -0500

Daisy Buchanan (Scarlett O'Hara reminded me!) but then, they both fit in with my rich white privilege point from before.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

thatollie — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 17:20:12 -0500

The only Lannister I found properly smackable was Joffrey. However, I found the Baratheon brothers (Stannis, Robert and Renly) were begging for a punch in the face.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hobbit Missa — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 18:26:57 -0500

That's true. I despise Robert and Renly. Honestly, I don't really blame Cersei for wanting him dead. Stannis is a bit psycho, but I think he really is attempting to do the right, just thing most of the time; his mind is muddled by the Red Woman. I only want to punch Jaime Lannister because of what he did in Game of Thrones. I'm almost done the 4th book now and I kind of love him by this point in time.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Allura_Darkelf — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 18:27:09 -0500

Oh, yeah. I forgot that part.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

tony stark — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 18:31:57 -0500

Ramsay Bolton for what he did in A Dance with Dragons. Mostly because what he did really messed up my favourite character in A Song of Ice and Fire.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

trinagirl98 — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 19:06:28 -0500

Well...A good chunk of the characters in Twilight...Especially Bella...but like some have said, i kind of have to blame that on the Stephenie (or however she spells it) Like, I knew from the first chapter of Twilight that she couldn't really write that well, but she created an interesting story, so ok, I'll bite. But by the time I got halfway through Eclipse, i was so pissed at Bella. Everyone was trying to save her life and she whined through the whole damn book. Still pisses me off. And Breaking Dawn...that book...I threw that book against the wall. Wasted a whole day of my winter vacation reading that book and basically, nothing happened. That kind of build up and...it was like a tease. the blue balls of reading. UGH! Stephenie ruined it for me...and I had no problem with Katniss through Hunger Games and Catching Fire, but MockingJay...again, I have to blame the author. Like i expected BS from Stephenie by the time i got to Breaking Dawn, but Suzanne...WHY!?!?!?!? Why did she ruin that whole damn series for me in that one crap book? Like I got to the end of the book and was like "WHAT THE FRESH HELL WAS THAT?!?!?"

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Slussen — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 03:35:41 -0500

This. Dolores Umbridge is, in my opinion, the most vile character ever written.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

.edtastic — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 05:21:33 -0500

Can I add -- Any main character that has no decency to just die already? I may be a character killer lover, but a lot of books I read, I kind of felt would have been better if they just died. Harry Potter - yeah, better dead. Bella - Yeah, better if she became a vampire rather than sulk about it for three books. I saw Water for Elephants and while I loved it, I don't think I'd ever read the book because I wanted his lover to die. Just die already. I have a tendency to love villains, honestly but I just wish that sometimes heroes would make their sacrifices and die. It's like the huge villain monologue - you get frustrated and annoyed by it, because they should just annihilate them already. I hope not to make this mistake. I have an anti-hero I have tried very hard to make hate-able and I hope no one likes him and wants to punch him in his oversize, moisturised face because I've done my job!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

KatrinasForest — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 11:38:57 -0500

I totally forgot about Sansa. I'm only just starting the second book, but I think Katelyn needs a punch in the face slightly more than her daughter right now.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hobbit Missa — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 12:02:55 -0500

I *love* Catelyn! It seems like everything she does is motivated solely by what she believes will help her children. She's not trying to scheme and plot how to take power for herself, but how to protect her children and bring them all home. *sniff* most of her chapters make me cry. But, yeah, she could use a slap to the face to help her think a bit more sanely.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hëradïn — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 14:43:19 -0500

I want to give theon grayjoy a good punch in the face and then walk up to ROOSE FUCKING BOLTON and throttle that motherfucker! red wedding indeed...

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hëradïn — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 14:54:42 -0500

renly is kind of a dick, joff needs a good beating and cersei is a cunt. I HATE the late walder frey and roose bolton, the men of lighting lord's band are starting to get on my nerves and the crow's eye is being a dick. all need a good ass kicking and some need to bullet in the head.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Hobbit Missa — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 15:44:24 -0500

The Red Wedding made me smack my older brother for even getting me into the Song of Ice and Fire series. It was bad enough at the end of Game of Thrones, but that...that was horridly unforgivable. Every Frey should die.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

olivertwisted — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 22:49:06 -0500

Ron Weasley. I was furious when I finished Deathly Hollows and lost basically every secondary character I loved, but that little twerp survived. And then he ended up with Hermione. Die, Weasley, die.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

sarahlucielle — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 22:55:33 -0500

Oh god I hate that little shit.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

shuriken7 — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 23:37:23 -0500

Max from Maximum Ride. She was such a self-centered little punk. I read the first two books because my little sister was all about them and I wanted to know what's up... but sheesh, that girl annoyed me to no end.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Ostenski — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 05:25:06 -0500

If you don't wanna punch your protagonist in the face you've screwed it up! I mean, you want to punch YOURSELF in the face, right? Of course. Everybody does. It'd be silly not to. So...

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Countess — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 06:18:00 -0500

And Sansa. >_> Because everything she did and her naive view of the world while the rest is going to hell just... Someone needed to give her a good beating.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Cayris — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 11:43:17 -0500

I wanted to punch Tybalt in the face in Romeo and Juilet, but only because he killed Mercutio and I love Marcutio. "A plague on both your houses!"

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Cayris — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 11:43:53 -0500

Mercutio*

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

candicebeever — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 13:46:14 -0500

Thank goodness someone mentioned Katniss. She didn't deserve either guy by the end of it. I wanted to punch her since Book 2.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Oranbega — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 17:25:21 -0500

Tyler Durden, just to see what would happen. Bartleby, the scrivner...um... and... probably Tyrion Lanister actually, because everyone is neglecting the anticipate the unbelievable comeback he would have. (Tyrion is hands-down my favorite character in Song though, to clarify)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

braids — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 02:26:23 -0500

We should be friends! I suffered in silence because I had no one to rant about it with. She was just... ugh, who does that, seriously? Especially considering all that Katniss had done for her. If Suzanne Collins wanted us to show sympathy for her because she lost her husband, she failed miserably in the end.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

jtselliott — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 03:00:10 -0500

I hated Larry for the first half of the Stand, but I loved him by the end. Outside of that... I don't know. I can't really think of any specific characters I hated. I can think of books, and by extension characters, that I hated - like Robinson Crusoe - but as far as characters that I personally disliked, eh.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

s13jshaffer — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 08:32:32 -0500

Hermione Granger. Insufferable bitch. Oh, and Piggy from Lord of the Flies...for pretty much the same reason as Hermione, I guess.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

crlast — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:35:52 -0500

Rose? What about Donna? She ALMOST made me quit watching the series.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

crlast — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:36:59 -0500

How about just punching the author for subjecting the world to the Twilight series?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

crlast — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:44:31 -0500

My sis bought the first Twilight book and we have one use for it at our house: bug-squisher.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Lunacy — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:47:23 -0500

Bella Swan in Twilight. Seriously, she MUST be the most annoying character ever. Ginny Weasley. [insert keysmash] :D

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

1-800-AQKHAN — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 15:29:37 -0500

Frank Wrinharten the OSS/CIA contact from Mother Night, never gives a burn notice or tells Campbell he's being cut off. Only to show up right before his exicution to say, "eh you're free to go." I know that's exactly how the charcter is intended to make you feel, and I love that book very much for pulling It off perfectly.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

bjpeat — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 22:01:51 -0500

All of Clive Cussler's SHAMELESS self-insertions. Which get more and more unbelievable and annoying the closer you get towards the present timewise. My heroes are freezing to death in a blizzard in Antarctica? I'll drive up in a snow cat and rescue them! Oh, my hero just got buried under half a mountain in a landslide? I'll drive up in my motor home, dig him out, give him a meal and a bath and a new set of clothes in his size before telling him vital information and driving him wherever he needs to go (even though we're still perfect strangers who don't recognize each other, despite the fact we've met at least 15 times before this). Twilight: like, everyone. Stalker jerks who break into your house to watch you sleep, idiot girls who find it romantic, 200-year-olds who think redoing high school a million times is fun.... HP: Snape, in at least the 1st 4 books. Lockhart. Umbridge. Malfoy-- and I must admit that when Hermione punched him, I was cheering my heart out! Wormtail, at least three times. I would have gladly punched him for slobbering all over me and just to make him shut up in the Shrieking Shack. And I'd be sorely tempted to, if not punch, well, accidently trip Sluggy. Oh, and all of the Death Eaters. And of course, Voldie. Catcher / Hayden Caulfield: literally one of only two books I can think of that I couldn't even force myself to finish, and it's all his fault. Whiny, spoiled, potty-mouthed brat. Eragon books: Elva. I go back and forth between feeling extreme pity for her and wanting to turn her over my knee for being a snot who uses the guilt and pain of her life to manipulate people, get what she wants, and get away with doing things she shouldn't be able to get away with. Narnia: Uncle Andrew, because he messes around with a bunch of stuff that he doesn't understand. Jadis, because she's the biggest spoiled brat ever-- destroying her entire world just so she can say she won the war? What's the point of winning if there's nothing left?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Redenzione — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 22:48:57 -0500

Jon Snow from ASOIAF. Seriously.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

starlitdown — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 23:44:26 -0500

So glad to see all the punching desires for the Twilight characters. They are so terrible. Edward is so "perfect" that he's completely awful as a character. "I might hurt you if I stay with you, so instead I will hurt you by leaving you." "Oh you don't wanna do these things? Well I'm gonna make you do them anyway because you're feelings/desires don't matter to me." "I am the man, bow down to me you subservient wench!"Not only all that, the writing is worse than my amateur garbage. Of course Bella has no personality. She is a shell for every lonely or bored woman out there to slip into so they can pretend everyone wants them and loves them too. It's disgustingly pathetic. I seriously lose respect for some one when they say they liked that series. Which, I admit, is wrong and way too judgmental of me. But it happens anyway. Thus the motivation for my novel! Besides them, and Umbridge from HP... Kahlan from The Sword of Truth series. By the time I hit Soul of the Fire or whatever it's called, I had to stop reading the series. When she was getting all mad at the main character for the wives crap I literally contemplated lighting the book on fire. Soul of the Fire indeed...

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

poi_son_joy — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 02:44:24 -0500

Starscream. If he weren't a giant robot. :| Seriously, Screamer, I LOVE YOU, but you make my knuckles itch.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

raptures_revenge — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 03:34:41 -0500

The Mary Sues and Gary Stus in everything Stephanie Meyer craps out. If I could erase them from existence, I would in a heartbeat. They're underdeveloped as hell and...ugh. Twilight ruined vampires for me for a long time. I had to re-read and re-watch Hellsing (ALUCARD FTW...seriously, he would beat the crap out of Cullen.) numerous times to rediscover my love for the supernatural. Dolores Umbridge is another one. Kudos to the person who said that. Until Cullen and the rest of Meyer's fucked-up fantasy gang, I'd never hated a character so much. And stepping into the world of anime for a moment, Kurosaki Ichigo and Inoue Orihime. I'd been fine with Ichigo for a while despite being outrageously OP, but when he killed Ulquiorra with the mother of all dues ex machina moves, that did it. And Orihime. She is everything I hate about women in anime and in literature: a big-breasted bimbo, except she's a ginger, rather than a blond. She has no real purpose and I can't even begin to explain how badly disappointed I've been that she hasn't died where it would've been most appropriate.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

raptures_revenge — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 03:37:16 -0500

Everything about Twilight ruined everything for me. I love vampire and werewolf folklore, and look what she did to that. Ugh.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

ghost.writer042 — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 04:09:46 -0500

Umbridge is at the top of my "Punch me!" list, followed by Melanie and Ashley Wilkes from Gone With the Wind, the entire cast (spare possibly Jacob until that abomination Renesme was born) of Twilight, and for some reason Prince Prospero from Poe's The Masque of the Red Death. Something about that character just made me want to make him hurt when I read the short story. Also, Percy Weasley, Gilderoy Lockhart, and Peter Pettigrew round out my list of characters that ought to be maimed list.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

allywa — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 04:27:48 -0500

I forgot his name, but the main character in The Perks of Being A Wallflower. Everyone's like, "omg it's such a good book, '& i swear, in that moment, we were infinite~'" and I'm just like, no. You're boring. And I hate you. OH, and Alaska in Looking for Alaska. Another book that got so much hype that just made me feel worse after reading it. I wouldn't punch Bella Swan- I'd beat her with a bat <3 I also don't see why everyone is hating on Ginny. :/

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Pugz — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 09:48:15 -0500

[quote=shuriken7] Max from Maximum Ride. She was such a self-centered little punk. I read the first two books because my little sister was all about them and I wanted to know what's up... but sheesh, that girl annoyed me to no end. [/quote] She's gotten worse since. I LOVED the punk in her, but she's gone from that to whiny little teen in the space of two books. Can I punch James Patterson and his ghost writer for that? My god, since that crap-fest of book 4 I have not been amused; then there's the whole 'Angel's evil - no she's not - oh wait, she is'. Don't even get me started with Daniel X and I won't even touch Witch and Wizard; their bad guy is called 'The One Who is The One'. Geez! I will also join in the Twilight staking fest! And I'll Astrid from 'Gone' to my list; she's a stuck up cow.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

pritchardry — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 11:31:25 -0500

Robert Langdon, you obnoxious Gary Stu. Screw you, screw your stupid made-up field with its failed etymology (pro-tip, Mr. Brown, grab a dictionary and look up 'semiotics'), your creepy romance-novel descriptions, but most of all for every idiotic half-baked Discovery special and verbal desecration of history I've had to hear about for the past eleven years. I never realized a fictional entity could actually make me angry. SO FULL OF HATE

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

DreamwalkerKita — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 15:01:45 -0500

Oh god, thank you. I absolutely LOATHED Gale in Mockingjay (wasn't much of a fan of his for the other two books, either...)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

DreamwalkerKita — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 15:04:35 -0500

I moreso wanted to punch Fang, since he turned into a giant douchenozzle. I'm kind of hoping he dies in the last book.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Adaptation — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 15:24:44 -0500

The only one I wouldn't run over with a combine is Charlie.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Adaptation — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 15:31:27 -0500

Elva makes me rage. And I totally agree about Clive Cussler's self-insertion. I can't believe his editor lets him get away with that. I guess it's because he has like a thousand books and they sell really well, but goddamn. I love Cussler, I really do, but that part needs to go.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Adaptation — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 15:35:20 -0500

I find that when I want to punch characters, it's either because they're very well written or they're very, very badly written. In addition to the others mentioned up here, Anne Boleyn in The Other Boleyn Girl makes me rage. She's such a selfish bitch. I just kept wishing they would behead her already.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

LizStaley — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:53:17 -0500

C3PO from Star Wars. Also, Grand Admiral Thrawn. Definitely Delores Umbridge- I HATED HER! And I despise Raistlin, from the Dragonlance series. I wanted to destroy him more and more with every page. It got to the point where I just couldn't finish the books my friend loaned me because I couldn't take him as a main character any more.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

LizStaley — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 20:02:02 -0500

Oh HOW could I forget Screamer? I laugh during the original animated movie when he gets what's coming to him.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

StormoftheCentury — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 20:03:30 -0500

I thought that was the point.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

StormoftheCentury — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 20:04:11 -0500

I can't hate Dolores Umbridge. She was created to be hated, and I always find myself liking those out of sheer spite.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:20:05 -0500

I agree with this one

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:23:58 -0500

The mother from White Oleander. She makes me think of my mother in law, straight up. Actually... All the foster mothers, too. Theyre just evil :/ Also, Umbridge. All the twilight haters, ever read Mark Reads Twilight? Its over on MarkReads.net. AWESOME

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:26:54 -0500

Id say Marla Singer, except shes not real either....

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:27:40 -0500

Yes! Thank you. Everyone is all Ginny hate and Im alone wanting to knock down Hermione.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:30:02 -0500

I've been through PTSD with similar symptoms, so I could tolerate it. I became Anti Katniss with the epilogue and Peeta Hater when she only had kids because he hounded her. Both need to be knocked out.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:31:24 -0500

Ill join. Triple curbstomping.... As long as there isnt a fourth it shouldn't be too graphic

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:33:54 -0500

I think a lot of people end up not hating Harry once it comes out he was a horocrux. Like, no shit he was such a whiny bitch. I agree with Katniss though. I think that was the authors intention, honestly. I dislike protagonist too :)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

aliviagrace — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 11:16:36 -0500

Woah, woah. We're punching ASoIaF characters and nobody wants to take out Ramsay Bolton? I guess he probably deserves a more violent end than that, but I think he's the most despicable villain the series has seen this far. Oh my gosh he makes me squirm with Righteous Hatred. And honestly? I loved Tyrion and Daenrys for the first three books and missed them terribly in the fourth, but book five makes me think that both of them--well, Dany especially--could use a nice punch in the face. And I agree that the brotherhood without banners are getting kind of annoying, and Crow's Eye needs a kick in the balls more than anything. Yeah, now that I think about it I'd probably go batshit on half of the whole cast.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

melbelle0418 — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 11:40:13 -0500

The cat from the hunger games... that thing is a bitch! And Fluer Delacour - she bugs me a lot

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

amandapearl2 — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 14:08:58 -0500

I 100% agree with Joffrey Baratheon/Lannister. He was such a little bitch little bitch. I also agree with Sansa, at least in Game of Thrones. So stupid, why would she pick Joffrey over her sister and father? I mean sure, Arya could be a little shit sometimes, but seriously. Also, let's talk about Lysa Tully for a minute. Holy god, I hated her so much. I'm not a huge fan of Little Finger, but you go you.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

welshficwitch — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 15:42:50 -0500

Bella Swan, because i was sick of her by the time she was an ungrateful little cow about her dad buying her a car...A CAR! and didn't make even make it to the introduction of the cullens because i loathed her that much...and i weep for humanity that people want to be like her... frodo...controversial i know, but i used to skip his bits when i read lotr because he never stopped freaking moaning... ce'nedra in the eddings belgariad series...*mimes throttling* both romeo and juliet...repeatedly... tess of the d'urbevilles...the guy who raped her...and the guy who claimed to love her... and sally in Thud! by pratchett...don't no one mess with angua! *grins*

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

PockyPuck — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:38:49 -0500

So very much yes. Tyrion is fantastic, but I wanted to strangle darling Joffrey with his undropped testicles. The rest of them were nearly as bad. Although Jaime did kind of turn out to be the sort of bastard I can't help liking for his audacity, damn him.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

PockyPuck — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:40:51 -0500

Thirding. How the hell did a nice, likable, reasonable man like that end up in that series?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

PockyPuck — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:42:21 -0500

Oh, I don't know about mermaid. The original mermaid legends were a lot closer to the sirens, after all. They had better teeth than Ms. Meyer's sparkly preteen-bait.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Solana Nyx — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 13:53:42 -0500

-Joffrey and viserys from a song of ice and fire series -holden definitely -president snow from hunger games trilogy -wormtounge from the lord of the rings -thenardier from les miserables -kyle from host -eldest from across the universe -reuter from the professor and many many more

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Tyjet — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 14:39:08 -0500

I'd hate to sound like a hater but.. has anyone else read the Daniel X books by James Patterson? Mr. Patterson is a great writer, but the Daniel X character can really be annoying. By the description of his powers, he should be able to just conjure up a plasma cannon and blast all his enemies into micro-dust. All through the book he describes all the cool stuff he can do with his powers, but when the bad guy shows up, he gets his butt whooped. Again.. I don't want to sound like a hater. Also, if i can side step the subject into Graphic Novel characters I'd like to punch, I would say Sasuke from Naruto. He is such a chump! My clan was wronged, so I'm going to destroy an entire village full of people to satisfy my revenge. Really?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Writing_Ninja — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:54:20 -0500

I agree with Sasuke. And sometimes Naruto and Sakura for still thinking Sasuke is worth saving. I only excused Naruto and Sakura because they were kids when it all went to heck. Sasuke..... I mean really. Who in their right mind would think that it was normal for a kid to be so full of revenge? Gosh. But I still like the naruto series. I also don't like Harry Potter and Ginny. I use to love those books but by the 5th one, I threw it out. It was too whiny for my tastes. I also didn't like how the adults were always "Well they are dead, but they still love you. By the way, we are sending you back to an abusive family because muggles can protect you easier against a dark lord who murders hundreds of people." Ginny seems like such a flat character too me. The romance didn't make since. The Twilight characters I did not like at all. It worries me when I see married adult women gushing about how great that book is. That romance was so shallow and creepy. In the Percy Jackson books, I kinda wanted to punch the greek gods for being morons with their kids. Especially the adults who kept saying "Well something bad is going to happen but we can't tell you."

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Writing_Ninja — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 16:13:40 -0500

That was the most hilarious thing I have read recently. It's so true.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

lingfeng — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 16:28:53 -0500

Joffrey Baratheon, Viserys, and Lysa Arryn from the Song of Ice and Fire series are at the very top of my list. Good lord, the amount of times I had to remind myself that yelling at a book does nothing while reading the first couple books of that series.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

stinkyllamaface — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 17:21:20 -0500

We're gonna go a little old school and say Anna Karenina. Seriously. SPOILER ALERT I was glad she threw herself under the train. All I could think was that it was about dang time.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

stinkyllamaface — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 17:25:49 -0500

Yes! This! Not only did I feel like Brown just looked up all this stuff on Wikipedia and then put it in a horrible book, every time the word "symbology" was mentioned, I thought of this scene from Boondock Saints: Detective Dolly: So what's the symbology there? Smecker: Symbology? Now that Duffy has relinquished his "King Bonehead" crown, I see we have an heir to the throne! I'm sure the word you were looking for was "symbolism." What is the ssss-himbolism there?

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

OwlyCreature — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:37:11 -0500

Yes! Wormtounge! I can't believe I'd forgotten how vile he is. And then you end up pitying him on top of it all because he is such a sad slimy loser. Yuck.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Stalebreath — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 19:01:22 -0500

St. John Rivers from Jane Eyre.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

NyssaM — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 04:29:40 -0500

No I'm sorry, if anyone in the P&P world needs a smackdown its Lydia Bennent! Hate her. My friend once remarked that if anyone needed a "sassy gay friend" it was Lydia, to which another friend responded with: Lydia does not deserve a "SGF" and i heartily agree

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

ALynnL07 — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 11:16:58 -0500

- Another punching for Sasuke from Naruto (he's one of the reasons I stopped reading) - Aizen from Bleach (EVERYTHING is according to his plan. EVERYTHING. Even this very typing of me wanting to punch him is according to his plan. ._.) - Pride from FMA, not because he's an overly bad character, but just because I personally don't like him. - Syaoran from Tsubasa, because he just suddenly snapped for no good reason. - Eragon. ._. Do I have to elaborate on a reason why? - Kiyomi Takada of Death Note. She's just so stuck-up.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

TeaLights — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 11:45:05 -0500

I love this thread. It is a joy to read. I agree whole heartedly about UMBRIDGE. I think the only time I ever became ACTUALLY and PHYSICALLY angry at a character was reading OotP's Umbridge. What. A. Stinker. Holden as well, never enjoyed reading that book. Also, Mrs. Bennet and Lydia Bennet from Pride and Prejudice. I HATE Mrs. Bennet's dramatics, and Lydia is so childishly arrogant and ignorant that it annoys the HELL out of me. Double punch. Also, Denethor from LOTR. He's in Return of the King, and is so stupid he doesn't notice that Faramir is alive when he goes to torch him, among EVERYTHING ELSE HE DOES. WHAT A DUNGBAT. Punch out. Twilight people as well, of course. =)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Käreitär — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 14:31:27 -0500

Make it almost every single female character from the series. I'm a female and feel really sorry for Rand being around so many nagging hags.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 15:16:34 -0500

By accident. Books 2 and 3 werent supposed to happen. When an arc about Jacob was called for she used Charlie more for fluffing words than anything. It is mentioned in the New Moon interview on her blog, I believe. She also babbles she not anti-feminism she is anti-human.... Its odd and she gets creepy :/

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

CoffeeAndClovers — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 16:32:36 -0500

Since the thread seems to be on an Anime kick atm Misa Amane. How she is with Light Yagami, you'd think she's an alternative universe version of sexy over caffeinated Bella Swan.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Lilac_Lady — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 17:01:55 -0500

Victor Frankenstein. 'Nuff said.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

blue_eyes_1990 — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 16:19:33 -0600

Umbridge I also hated Bellatrix after she killed Sirius, he was my favorite! It kind of annoyed me in one of the books when Harry would have a theory or suspicion of Malfoy (I think it was Half Blood Prince) and Hermione and other characters kept disbelieving him and saying he was just being suspicious and Malfoy wasnt up to anything, and it turned out he was definetly up to something, killing Dumbledore

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

golfgal08 — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 15:07:04 -0600

I'm joining the people who'd like to punch Hamlet in the face, as well as Romeo and Juliet. Hamlet, especially though, was the most whiny character I've ever come across. And a couple I haven't seen mentioned yet: Qui-Gon Jinn for that douche move he pulled on Obi-Wan at the end of Phantom Menace (otherwise I liked him as a character); Anakin Skywalker (not to be confused with Darth Vader, mind you); and one of the most-hated characters in existence before Twilight came along, Jar-Jar Binks.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Erosaf — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 04:42:16 -0600

Dolores umbridge indeed. Hated her. And Sam Uley!! Stuck up alpha that one! Doesn't need to be so uptight!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Angryman — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 17:42:32 -0600

Leon is definitely the guy I would love to punch in the face. The enigmatic twit won't even let ME know what he's up to. But if I ever had the chance to punch him in the face... I would let it slip by. He scares me.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Earthsick — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 01:40:30 -0600

From the books I actually read: Claude from Twelve. Apart from being an awful book already, this character is the worst of all. I mean.I don't want to spoiler anything but asldfajsdklfjdklfj gosh, what he does in the story is already super flat and awful but the end ... guys, please don't ever read this book.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Angryman — Tue, 31 Jan 2012 15:56:10 -0600

Sorry, a bit of a rant about one of my characters.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Rubyfruit — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 12:24:05 -0600

Actually, I kind of want to punch every character that Tim LaHaye has ever written. All of them. Why? Because I feel wrong about wanting to punch Elsie Dinsmore of the Elsie Dinsmore series, because she's friggin' eight years old and that series started long, long ago, so I'm slightly more forgiving, even though Elsie is such a failure as a character that she even fails at being a Mary Sue, and all the non-Christian characters are horrible people for no other reason than not being Christian. Anyone written by Tim LaHaye deserves at least one punch in the face, and almost all of them are adults, so I don't feel guilty at all for saying that! They all sound exactly the same and even his Evil Sinner Nonchristians are ridiculously conservative-acting, and their only crime is questioning the Perfect Main Characters. Also, anyone from Bill Meyer's Forbidden Doors series. From what I remember it was Goosebumps for kids who weren't allowed to read it and all the non-Christians were dumber than bricks, and even a couple of the main chara Furthermore, the entire premise of an obscure graphic novel/manga-style work called Serenity deserves to be taken 'round back and shot. The most popular kids at school? In the [i]Bible study group?[/i] Really?! Unless it was a Christian school, and this wasn't, it wasn't likely to happen. In fact, I think that the Bible study kids were either roundly ignored, or picked on just the same as the other assortment of outcasts deemed "uncool". You can probably tell that I have an enormous grudge against works written by and for Evangelical Christians, but that's because I was subjected to a lot of it when I was younger, and the thing I remember most is that that all the characters tended to sound the same, the writing was awful, and it was often the only thing approved by my parents back in those days.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Rubyfruit — Sat, 11 Feb 2012 21:40:55 -0600

*and even a couple of the main characters were the same way. Stupid lack of edit key.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Earthsick — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 06:19:10 -0600

Funny, how hardcore Christians are allowed to write crap like that, but when it comes to Harry Potter or His Dark Materials, religious people throw a big fit.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Rubyfruit — Thu, 16 Feb 2012 06:17:39 -0600

Strange that I couldn't get into either series, Harry Potter because it kind of bored me my first attempt at reading it, and the latter for the same reason. You see, hardcore Christians have what is pretty much a captive audience, so of course they can get away with writing things that could be called "crap" under even the most generous definition. It's not like their audience is willing to know, or even can know, that there's better stuff out there. And let it be said, I have no ill will toward Christianity, just the mindset that it's okay to write complete garbage, again, even with people willing to be generous and make as many allowances as possible, as long as the audience has no way of reading anything else, either willingly or non.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

thecandiedmango — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 21:48:30 -0600

Agreed. Wuthering Heights is an all-around awful story.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Iasila — Thu, 01 Mar 2012 09:50:09 -0600

I read Catcher in the Rye twice. The first time was in 9th grade when I was a 4.0 student, popular in the band, had friends etc, and while things were tough I was optimistic and essentially looked down on people with internal issues. Why didn't they just get off their asses and do something about it? He bugged the crap out of me, and I was constantly yelling at him in my head. Two years later, I read it again, and I cried. I WAS Holden. The things he said and did made perfect sense. I wanted to meet him over a glass of malt and talk to him about all the phonies of the world. Haters gonna hate, but I'll say this: never again will I judge something I can't understand.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

nevillegirl — Thu, 15 Mar 2012 11:35:43 -0500

[quote=Circe Marda] Dolores Umbridge. I have never screamed so much at a book as I have at Order of the Phoenix. I even ended up throwing my book across the room at one point. Also, Holden Caulfield. Not an antagonist, I know, but I read Catcher in the Rye all the way through and just hated him by the end. I just couldn't stand his over dramatic whining. There must be something wrong with me because everyone I met just loves Holden. I don't know, man. [/quote] I really, really, really like Bellatrix, but I hate Umbridge! :) I guess it's because Bellatrix at least is awesome in an evil, terrifying way, and Umbridge is just. Annoying!!!!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Thunder_Petal — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 11:04:00 -0500

Bella from Twilight. Actually...pretty much any character from those books. Vampires belong to the horror genre, not the romance. (or maybe I just heavily dislike poorly written 'romance' (aka. "iloveyoubella." "iloveyoutooedward...butilovejacobtoo. omgwhatislife. i'msounprettyandunpopular"). Ginny Weasley. I have an irrational hate of her. Not because she (((SPOILER))) marries Harry in the epilogue, but because she goes from an awkward preteen, to teen slapper, to 'all-knowledgeable-and-too-well-rounded-perfect-love-interest'. And Harry being in a relationship with her is weird. She's his best friend's LITTLE SISTER. Creepy. Also Louis from Interview with a Vampire. But it'd be more of a 'shut up and stop whining, but I loves ya anyway' sort of punch.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

UnicornEmma — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 05:57:52 -0500

I liked Quentin for a while, but eventually grew to dislike him. Eliot was the main reason I got through that book, I loved him.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

UnicornEmma — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 06:06:27 -0500

I agree! Gale was one of my favorite characters in that series, through all the books.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

UnicornEmma — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 06:09:01 -0500

This. <3

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

UnicornEmma — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 06:11:32 -0500

Lupin's my favorite character in HP, and he so deserved a punch in the face for the whole 'I want to run away and be a kid again!' stunt. Not because I hated him, no, but because I love him. That's why he needed to be punched super hard. Oh, goodness, so hard.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Sayaren — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 11:33:04 -0500

Farmer from Tamora Pierce's book mastiff. I hate him more than I have EVER hated a fictional character in my life. He just swoops in and somehow manages to get Beka. F*** that.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Sayaren — Sun, 29 Apr 2012 11:37:30 -0500

I still want to punch Syaoran. I also want to punch CLAMP for that ridiculously complicated explanation for why he did it and for making my brain hurt while I read the last 4 volumes or so.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

shaunchattey — Tue, 01 May 2012 02:28:42 -0500

Why do you all pick on Holden! I love him in a depressing and Russian sort of way. Maybe because he reminds me of myself. Wait that means you all hate me too? I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU PEOPLE quit hating on me! (and Holden!)

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Beastfire — Fri, 04 May 2012 13:03:24 -0500

If there's any character at all that I'd love to kick the crap out of, it'd be Pip from "Great Expectations". It's been years since I'd been forced to read it for English class, and all I remember about this character is some degree of whining, an attempt on his life (that, I fully admit, I cheered for), and said attempt being unsuccessful. Also, Robert Jordan from Hemingway's "For Whom The Bell Tolls". I couldn't connect with him at all, and double slaps to the author for ALWAYS using the guy's first and last name. I'd have gone for a drinking game, taking a shot of something whenever Robert Jordan's full name was used, but that'd get someone killed within the first 25 pages, I'm sure.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Lady Ebonique — Sat, 05 May 2012 21:18:09 -0500

Oh, I'm gonna get a kick in the pants for this but. . .Frodo from LOTRs. Now before you hit me let me say that I LOVE LOTRs with all of my heart and most of the time I love Frodo (although Faramir is my fav), but he gets a bit too whiny for me in the third book. "The Ring is mine!" rubbish! Gollum deserves a seat on the throw-a-ball-and-the-man-falls-into-the-tank-of-water-game at the fair. Oh, and Yoreth from the Houses of Healing needs to be introduced to the new cure for overactive tongue wagging: ducktape! I absolutely detest Gale from THG. Grr! *SPOILER* Let's drop a bomb on your sister and see if you'll love me afterwards! Gag. Henry in the Red Badge of Courage. I'm not even going start because if I did I'd never finish. *Punches the living daylights out of him* Mr. Collins from Pride and Prejudice and also Mr. Willoughby from Sense and Sensibility. I LOVE Colonel Brandon! Ahem!! Back on topic. . .um. . .what was I talking about? Oh yes! One more. . .Roxanne from Cyrano de Bergerac. Falling in love with Christian for his beauty before she even spoke two words to him? Ugh! Poor Cyrano for falling for someone like her!

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

AltoidStorm — Wed, 16 May 2012 14:35:04 -0500

Wowza, there is a lot of character hate in this forum. I find it really hard to hate characters, as I know their purpose was to get a rise out of me and I LOVE them for it.... But as per the topic, characters I would like to punch in the face: Lydia from Pride & Prejudice Angela from Angela's Ashes Anything in Twilight, including the author Denethor in LOTR among many others lol

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Harlow — Thu, 17 May 2012 19:43:50 -0500

OKAY! -Eragon. Everything about him just pisses me off. He acts like such a blowhard when he goes from that to 'scared little boy' and he pisses me right off. -Isabella Swan and Edward Cullen. Wow, a book glorifying a relationship based on abuse. Disgusting. Bella needs a backbone and Edward needs a shrink and a restraining order. -Ashley Wilkes. Dude, either STAY WITH MELLY OR DON'T. Yes, I'm screaming at my book. -Hermione Granger. Get over yourself. -Katniss Everdeen. I never thought of her as being a BAMF. I saw her more as a lazy character for an author that wanted to write an 'action girl' and ended up failing in the end - and wanted for people to give her cookies for it.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

Harlow — Thu, 17 May 2012 19:55:53 -0500

I disagree with this strongly. (Yes, and I know that this is old) I agree with the part of wanting to slap her in the face (there are MANY times where I want to do just that), but she was actually an incredibly strong female lead, and for me, is one of the standards in terms of female leads. Mature doesn't always equal strong. You have to consider that Scarlett is a woman who grew up in a position where modern ideas of maturity was not expected of her. She's also the result of an atmosphere that was incredible sheltered and based on beauty, getting men, having money and pretty dresses and having things handed to you on a silver platter. Spoiled would be the least of her worries. All of the O'Hara daughters with the exception of Careen were spoiled. I daresay Suellen was more spoiled than Scarlett - she was ready to sell her family OUT if it meant that she could be at or above Scarlett's level. Scarlett had a business head that was unlike any woman of that book, and especially for the era, and it shows growth in that she goes from being a spoiled woman who is expected to be useless and simply run a household like Ellen, to being a spoiled woman who is willing to throw everyone underneath the bus to provide for herself and hers. She also demonstrates that she's capable of legitimate affection when she gives birth to Bonnie, and grieves like crazy when Bonnie dies, even though she neglected Wade and Ella. Also read it from this angle - Scarlett is a woman that shows signs of a personality disorder. (Specifically Narcissistic) She's going to think about things in terms of herself. She wants to be a lady who people dote on and speak well of, just like her mother. She wants to be the woman that is the center of attention for the county. She wants to have Ashley's attention but she doesn't like how he doesn't fall in line because he's in love with Melanie. She wants to be able to run a business and save Tara so that she eventually have that fantasy of being the great lady. She wants for people to comfort her and fall all over her after the Shantytown incident. She wants to make people envious *of her* when she gets married, and has Rhett buy her a massive rock so that she can shove it in people's faces. She wants to make people even more envious when she builds the house on Peachtree street. She is perfectly incapable of thinking about anyone but herself, even to the end. That's how a person with a personality disorder like hers views the world. Scarlett O'Hara, actually, is one of the most human and flawed characters around. It's actually those flaws that makes her one of the strongest female characters in literary history.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

jordan-leeann — Sat, 19 May 2012 19:24:16 -0500

Harry Potter. I have a tendency to hate protagonists in stories anyway - compared to basically everyone else surrounding them the protagonist usually comes off as terribly annoying - but Harry Potter is a special breed of annoying. Alaska Young from Looking for Alaska. For someone who has guys falling at feet everywhere she goes, she's remarkably silly, moody, and all around irritating. She's exactly the kind of person I loathed when I was in high school, yet high school kids in this book admire her for those exact traits that generally piss people off. (The book itself is absolutely incredible though. One of my favorites eternally.) Jimmy Cross from The Things They Carried. He disturbed me greatly. The feelings he had for Martha were not normal. I don't know about you guys, but when I have a crush on someone I don't feel the urge to "breathe in their blood and be smothered." And the newest addition to the list...Shuya Nanahara from Battle Royale. Oooh, let's create a Marty Stu of epic proportions and have him be the protagonist! And all the girls in the story will be hopelessly in love with him because he's a "rocker"! And let's not give characters entirely more interesting and likable than he is more than one chapter - a chapter in which they are brutally murdered - in order to focus on Shuya even more than we already do! Woo! (Barf.) ...strangely, all of these books listed are some of my favorites. Weird how that happens.

Re: Characters you would most like to punch in the face

UnicornEmma — Sun, 20 May 2012 03:49:47 -0500

To be fair, if I remember correctly, it wasn't so much, "Let's drop a bomb on your sister and see if you'll love me afterwards!" as it was, "Hey, you should love me! I'm going to do the best I can to help the world, damn, that bomb landed on your sister, guess I messed that up too much, didn't I?" I mean, he said he knew he had no chance with Katniss after the Prim thing, didn't he? Or did I imagine that?