bullied at school

hey im being bullied at school and i dont know what to do about it. any ideas??

You need to find an adult. Talk to a teacher, the school counselor, the principal, your parents... keep talking until someone listens. Most schools have a zero-tolerance bullying policy, and they take it seriously. GEt help from adults... immediately.

What Dragonchilde said. Talking to adults DOES help. I speak from personal experience when I say this.

Also, please remember that you're not alone. You've got a support system there for you to lean on--parents, teachers, principals, trusted adults. Let them help you.

Best of luck!

I agree with the others.

Talk to someone, preferably an adult. Especially one with the authority to do something about it.

I should have done this as a kid and I regret that I didn't. I still have issues related to this, and I'm now in my fifties.

Do whatever it takes to get it stopped.

Bullying needs to be stopped!

Wish you well!

If I might add something to this, yes, go to an adult and make sure the adult . . . follows up!

This is important because bullying is different than when most of us were young. When I was kid you could talk to an adult or (using my methodology) "convince" the bully to stop (up hill, both ways, in the snow, you know). Bully's then only picked on those they thought were weaker than them so when you demonstrated otherwise, they stepped away.

These days, bully's are FAR more cowardly then they used to be and have a support structure of even worse cowards. Kids like yourself don't have to deal with just one person who, when "put in their place" lost their friends' support. Now, their friends "gang up" on the victim.

What I'm saying is that when you talk to an adult, make sure they understand the full situation and FOLLOW UP to make sure the bullying stops from all sides. Don't let that adult with authority take the easy way out, make them stand up to end bullying instead of just saying, "don't do that" and walking away.

I'll be thinking of you, best wishes.

I agree with Webgoji. The problem today is that "tell an adult" is technically true but FAR too simplified.

The worst bullies are the popular ones with the network of friends who support them and who the teachers think are cool.

I'm going to say something unpopular here, but if the adults really can't do anything (no witnesses, no proof, kid has too good of a reputation, too many friends and thus repercussions if you DO tell an adult, et cetera)-then you need to confront the bully and stand up for yourself.

This has happened to me before. I faced that sort of a bully. There was no way an adult could do anything about it. If any other kid had known that I had told an adult anything (and it would have gotten out somehow) then the bully's group of much stronger, burlier friends would have beaten me up. So I had to stand up to a kid. I'm afraid to say that we got into a fight, but the kid shook my hand afterward and we went our separate ways. He never bothered me again.

I know that people are going to be up in arms about this post, but there really are times when you have to do that. It sucks, but sometimes that's just the way it is.

One thing, though-NEVER start a fight or throw the first punch. Ever. ONLY stand up for yourself. Don't make it physical unless they make it physical first. I can't stress this enough. Standing up for yourself is about not taking his crap anymore. If he's not giving you crap, don't give him a reason to.

Agreeing with everyone else here - talk to your parents, and then to the principal/or a teacher, someone in a position of power. You don't have to suck it up and take the bullying.

And you should totally stand up for yourself when you're being bullied. I'm not saying that you don't already, and I don't know what type of bullying you're being subjected to (verbal, physical, etc.) but don't just take it. Tell them to knock it off, and leave you alone. They might not stop, but it's worth a try, if you tell them to go away whenever they're messing with you. Look the bully (not sure if it's a group thing, if it is, this applies to the 'main' bully) straight in the eye, and tell them to stop.

Good luck :)

I agree that talking to an adult is a good plan, certainly if the bullying gets physical, but be aware that not all adults will be understanding and supportive. Adults can be as clueless as teenagers about difficult matters such as bullying. It's not like that they magically get all the answers when they turn 21. If you can't find anyone who will listen, perhaps you can find support from a website like www.bullying.org

But it is also important to empower yourself. Feeling dependent on any other person - including adults - can make you feel even more insecure.

First: realize that there is nothing wrong with you, no matter what others say. You are a unique, valuable human being. You are OK the way you are.

Second: realize that people who bully and put down other people feel very insecure deep inside. They often pick on people who are very much more self-confident. Self-confidence doesn't mean putting on a big show about how great you are. It means staying true to yourself, doing the things you believe are right and good, however humble.

Third: while it is certainly a tough lesson, and no fun at all, feeling rejected is one of the main reasons why many of the greatest writers turned to writing. In the final analysis, all of us experience times when we feel utterly alone in the world. It is a great pain, but this same pain has produced wonderful fiction. The bullying should certainly be stopped, it is unacceptable, but while it lasts, realizing that some good can come out of it can help to make you feel stronger.

Fourth: turn your attention to people and activities that make you feel good about yourself. Bullying can draw your attention away from those good things because it is so annoying and painful. The only answer is to keep focussing your attention on the good things over and over again. It helps to build a shield against all the angry words and put downs.

Fifth: realize that you are not alone. Others have already written that they have been bullied too. So was I. I feel your pain, which is why I am writing this. I don't want you to be bullied and hope that it stops soon.

Definitely definitely remember that you are not alone! We (your fellow Wrimos) are supporting you 110%!!

Umm, yeah. I skimmed a bit of the advice here and there, and will respectfully disagree. First of all, I'd like specifics on what is going on. There are a lot of different things under the "bullied" umbrella, and there are a lot of different responces to them. Also, you're in the states right? I don't know much about nonamerican legal systems, so if you're from somewhere cool, my advice will be a lot more shaky.

Heh, you kids and your fancy profiles...shoulda thought of that before I posted. Australia eh? Other than it's harder to get a gun there than it is in NYC my knowledge of your legal system is basically nonexistent. Either way, let me know the specifics of what's going on and I can still have something to say...I'll just talk about cops and lawyers a lot less.