Suggest fillers in 48 hours!

I'm running out of padding. I don't have the time or energy to write new whole chapters of filler content, but little snippets, I can do. So, I'm gonna put this thread up for suggestions! They don't necessarily have to coincide with my story (don't click my name), so go crazy!

inb4usethedaremachine

Insert philosophy. At like, any given moment, when a character is talking about a certain belief or something, insert a bit of discourse on the topic.

Describe the apple of MC's eyes. Be extensive in talking about what they look like, down to the MC's feelings about the person.

I've been having my characters read Wikipedia articles. More word count then songs and there's something to fit no matter what the plot.

Watch any comedy show in the 70s, 80s or 90s! :D Try to insert some of the taglines/catchphrases of the show characters and try to put it in your novel.

Things like:

Rose: "You're not going to eat them [chocolate cookies], are you?"
Dorothy: "No, dear. We are going to some dumb country and use them as money."

Road trip!

Good Lord, I feel that 90% of what I've written is padding. XD

Make the characters talk to themselves, stream-of-consciousness style. Have them comment on everything. Describe works of art and architecture. Go wild with the purple prose. Recount history and past events.

Foot notes. Foot notes everywhere!

Don't report.
An example:
Last night, Timmy heard the rocks tapping on his window. He stopped writing, got up and went outside with a gun to protect his kids.
That's reporting.
This is how a novel should look like:
The incessant knocks on the window made Timmy misspell 'Hello.' The sound was rough and brisk, probably a pebble. Should he check it out? No, it might just be little boys, but they mess around with him during the time when the sky was blue, not when stars brighten the dark void above him.
His mind was made up. It was definitely nothing important, but he had to play safe. He put the ball pen cap on top of his pen. He got his good old Berretta from the the good old days in the army from the worn out cabinet. He cocked it, walked slowly and got ready to turn the knob next to the room of his innocent little angels.