[YA & Children's Lit] Requests for Readers

Please use this thread to find a reader for your novel! When posting, please remember to use the Template as listed in the sticky thread at the top of this forum! PLEASE read the guidelines before posting... not reading the guidelines results in unnecessary questions and the possibility your request will be ignored.

Please use the preview option when posting. At this time, there is no ability to edit, so what you post WILL stay as is.

Post your request here for your readers. It does not have to be for the novel you wrote for National Novel Writing Month. (If you are interested in something posted here DO NOT respond in this thread, send the poster a NaNoMail.)

Do NOT contact someone about reading their novel if you have no intention of providing feedback.

Copy and Paste Template:

Title:
Length, Draft and Language:
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words)
Sub Genre & Keywords:
Known Issues:

Critique Requested:
Critique Tolerance:

Experience & Goals:
Method of Communication:
Anything else? Disclaimers?

Title - (Skyways) On

Length, Draft and Language - About 45kish; First/Mid-Second Draft; English; First Person partial stream-of-consciousness

Brief Summary - Gabriel Reinhart has always had anxiety attacks. Because of these, he's never had many friends and copes with the loneliness by trying to escape through drugs, music, and maybe even death. Can a new girl, Megan, save him? Or will she cause more trouble? Can his best friends Prosper and Kayden protect him from his own mind? Or will he have to save himself?

Sub Genre & Keywords - Escape, teenagers, music, bands, guitar, piano, drugs, Xanax, Vicodin, alcohol, life, depression

Known Issues - A little bit of lost plot, perhaps some characters aren't focused on enough. Also a lot to do with me being highly inexperienced with drugs and alcohol (therefore inconsistent possibly), and the fact that I am not a guy and not positive on how the male mind works. Potential British spelling.

Critique Requested - I would like to know how the story is in general, the emotion and steam-of-consciousness, character development, and language used. I often write for British characters and am largely in the habit of it, so sometimes it sneaks into American characters' stories. In addition, I sometimes use a larger vocabulary than a normal teenager would, as my brother noted (though I'm a teenager myself), though I feel Gabey here is a little poetic. Just use your discretion

Critique Tolerance - Tell me the truth. Tear it apart. This is my baby--as is the main character--but it needs to grow up, and I need to let it go.

Experience & Goals - This is my third novel; someday I do hope to publish. In fact, this is the only one being set up for publishing

Method of Communication - Email is probably best; just NaNoMail me and I'll give it to you/email it to you. Other option suggestions welcome.

Anything else? Please excuse my product placement; I just don't want to approve of certain products so I want to be very clear they aren't there. This wasn't for NaNo. Strong language, suicide, drugs; Intended for a teenage audience, but not a weak one. Make no mistake, this is NOT NOT NOT a children's book. It is meant to bring up mental issues and teenage depression. It is meant to be a little gross and painful to read (not in the, er, Twilight way... more in the 1984-Miniluv way...not suggesting I'm Orwell at all, just to be clear, haha). My brother's one of the few people who has read and and said a few lines were really, really harsh, but that's the way it should be. In short, Gabe has a crazy little mind, so don't freak out if you look into it.

Thanks!

Title: Thief of Dreams

Length, Draft and Language: just over 50K words, in English

Brief Summary: at end of post

Sub Genre: Adventure, maybe Historical Fiction

Keywords: murder, intrigue, irony

Known Issues: I use a lot of alliteration, which some people find hard to deal with, and a lot of adverbs and adjectives.

Critique Requested: anything you feel you specialize in, I'll take all the help I can get

Critique Tolerance: tear it apart!

Experience & Goals: This is my first novel and I would like to submit it for publication, eventually

Method of Communication: E-mail is my preference, and I will send a copy in electronic format (please specify preference of format - .doc, .docx, .pdf, etc.)

Anything else? Disclaimers? Seriously, tear the thing apart, make it bleed and cry out in anguish please


SYNOPSIS:

Lady Catherine gives birth to a son, the product of an illicit rendezvous and her father orders the infant killed. A servant steals the baby away to raise it away from the nobility but is killed in the process. The baby is found and adopted by an inventor and his wife and raised as their own, as just another commoner. The truth of his heritage is discovered and his family flees to avoid being broken apart. The family is tricked into returning to their hometown where the parents are imprisoned.

The truth of the betrayal is discovered and the noble child decides to take up his rightful position as heir. As part of his new duties, he must travel the realm and mingle with the commoners under a presumed identity so he can become aware of the needs of the people. During one of his travels, he meets and falls in love with a beautiful girl. Around this time, a gang of bandits has heightened their threats to the peace, menacing travelers and hijacking merchant caravans.

The nobles hire hunters to track and find the leader of the bandits. During a botched robbery, the location of the bandit compound is discovered by a pair of fugitives. The bandit queen learns of this and sets a trap for the fugitives. The trap goes off wrong and innocent people are killed, leading to the bandit queen’s arrest and execution. It isn’t until the evidence that the sentence has been carried out is presented to the nobles that the young lord discovers the bandit queen is the woman he fell in love with.

Title: 80 Divisions
Length, Draft and Language: 54,300 words, First Draft, English
Brief Summary: It's at the end of the post. :D
Sub Genre & Keywords: Horror, Fantasy, Mythology...
Known Issues: Inconsistency errors

Critique Requested: Anything's fine.
Critique Tolerance: I don't care. :D

Experience & Goals: I don't have much experience. x3 I've written a lot of fanfiction, and have written a few other random things. I write like... every day. x3
Method of Communication: Email.


Brief Summary:
Nobody ever went farther than the first room. The house had a certain ominous feeling about it that made people turn around immediately. But what happens when three sophomores from the local high school make it past the first room? What is in this house?

Unfortunately, making it out with their soul intact will be more difficult than they thought. Inside the house is one of the most frequently used entrances to Hell, without dying, of course. Luckily, they've only got three divisions to get through. But when you're dealing with Hell, three divisions is sometimes too much. Another problem? The devil doesn't seem like too bad of a guy, despite the fact that he keeps all 'children' - or, anyone twenty-three or younger - near him, and the fact that he stabs people when he gets annoyed.

Communication is getting tough as well, when two of them don't know sign language and the other one is mute. And somewhat self-absorbed, and seems to always know the answer to everything. Not to mention the fact that he's the one that practically led them to Hell.

Somehow, they gain a guide that knows way too much about Hell to be normal. Oh, and did anyone mention the fact that he was a mass murderer when he was alive? No? Well, there's that too. Not to mention werewolves and a certain boy in Division 80 who can control you for up to three hours at a time.

Who's on their side? Have they been betrayed? Did they do something wrong, will they be able to get out? How many times can you die before it gets unhealthy?

Title: Deathwalker

Length, Draft and Language: Approx 108K, First Draft, in English

Brief Summary: Olivia's life comes to an abrupt end when a run-in with a mugger in the park leaves her with a bullet in her chest. She finds herself transported to an afterlife just as dangerous and unpredictable as the real world. It is an ever-changing universe that she soon realizes she has touched in her dreams - a universe where she can be killed just as easily as she was before.

But not everyone who dies is left in this afterlife. In fact, Olivia discovers that she is one of a few souls who has ended up there - along with Paul, an innate fighter and survivor who died over 800 years ago, and the rest of his little gang of departed souls. They are no closer to understanding their purpose in this afterlife than Olivia is. But, haunted by voices on the wind and the face of a ghostly child, Olivia may come to understand why she is there - and what she needs to do to escape it.


Sub Genre & Keywords - Speculative, Adventure, Romance

Known Issues - As far as the writing itself goes, I know it is a little too wordy, and I know I tend to fall back on cliches a little too much (just in the writing, not in terms of plot - so, cliches like 'the shock hit her like a sledgehammer' or 'ice blue eyes')

Critique Requested - Plot and Character, mostly, as general or in-depth as you want to go. Anything else that stick out to you.

Critique Tolerance - Any and all! I can take it :D

Experience & Goals - This is my fifth completed novel, and would like to publish eventually. It is likely, after getting some initial feedback, that I will rewrite.

Method of Communication - Email. Just NanoMail me for the my email.

Anything else? I'm mostly just looking for some general feedback; what did you like, what didn't you like, etc. If you have time for a more in-depth critique, that's great too :D

Title: Footsteps
Length, Draft and Language: 50,006, First Draft, English.
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words)
Michaela Fields is merely average. A high school sophomore living in a wealthy community with busy and rich parents dealing with average high school problems. Her boyfriend who broke up with her because of his parents, grades, the usual. Then, something happens that spins her life out of control; she gets pregnant, and the child is her ex's. Now she is forced to deal with a whole new set of problems. But when the unthinkable happens, the couple is completely unsure of how to cope. But she'll never be sure exactly whose footsteps anyone is going to follow...
Sub Genre & Keywords: Romance, Teenage Drama, Pregnancy
Known Issues: It's pretty cliche and slightly Mary Sue-ish...it's fairly crappy in general. :P

Critique Requested: Anything!
Critique Tolerance: Medium. Don't go too easy, but don't be ridiculously harsh.

Experience & Goals: This is my first novel. I'm definitely not publishing it anytime soon, but maybe some day.
Method of Communication: E-mail, Facebook, whatever.
Anything else? Disclaimers? Uh...there's some language. But there isn't like, twenty curses per page.

Title: Full Circle
Length, Draft and Language: 50131, Draft 1 (Straight out of NaNo :), Strong Language
Brief Summary:
Senior Year, a round of mini-golfing and a road trip to NYC turn out to be more than Annie bargained for. Her, Jacob & Kelsea have always been tight: Annie and Jacob work together at his family's cafe, Kels and Jacob have been dating since sophomore year, and Annie and Kels wound up best friends. But when Annie drinks a little too much, and sleeps with Jacob at a friend's party, their friendships fall apart.
Sub Genre & Keywords: Romance, YA
Known Issues: I write my paragraphs in circles during NaNo to boost word count, and it goes along with a previous NaNo, so some plotlines kind of appear of nowhere.
Critique Requested: Anything!
Critique Tolerance: Medium - I would love honest feedback on the plot, (I know there's some angles I just ought to get rid of) characters and writing ability.

Experience & Goals: High school student, 4 (won!) NaNos, and just self-publishing...I would like to get the kinks out before it goes on my (and possibly some friends') shelf.
Method of Communication: Email? Whatever works for you.
Anything else? Disclaimers? They are not the most well-behaved characters, so there is some language/sex/underage drinking. Its directed towards high school students.

I've also posted this in the horror/supernatural section since it fits there too but:
Title: Clockwork Spirit

Length, Draft and Language: A little over 50K, 1st draft, English.

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): Boe and his friends were orphans. In a not so distant future the food sources were becoming lower and more and more people were deciding to give up their children. That’s why when the twisted scientists Dr. Luis and Dr. Smith offered the attendant at the orphanage a bribe to skip the “adoption process” and simply take the children she accepted their offer. But now Boe and his friends were put into peril. The scientists were experimenting with replacing failing body parts of children with electronics but as they near their “deadline” they began to rush their work and replace parts that were previously working fine. Boe became afraid and attempted to escape but he has not factored in the variable of weather and died alone in a snowy forest. But Boe’s spirit was not gone, even from the world of the dead he acted as an outside observer and tried to change the fate of his friends. Meanwhile Dr. Luis and Smith became frantic at the loss of a test subject and Boe started hearing them talk of a “deadline” for their work. Were these two scientists working for something even larger?

Sub Genre & Keywords: It's a ghost story with some sci-fi aspects mainly for the YA age group.

Known Issues: Some plot holes/hard to describe logically things, too few paragraph breaks and confusing sentences + much more XD.

Critique Requested: I'd like to know of what you like and if there are any major issues in your mind though I am very sensitive about criticism.

Critique Tolerance: As I said before, I am VERY sensitive about criticism meaning I probably shouldn't even be posting here (I cry at many comments) so try not to be too harsh about it, just help me if there are some major issues, I know my writing style is very confusing at times but I like it like that.

Experience & Goals: This is the longest thing I've ever written, I am only 14 and before NaNoWriMo the most I'd ever written of a story was around 15K so I'm not too experienced.

Method of Communication: I'd prefer NaNoMail though will do e-mail if necessary.

Anything else? Disclaimers? My story has some swearing and a scene with a dissection of a child in it so if you are not comfortable with that type of thing do not read it. Also this is my NaNo story for this year so if you want to you can read the excerpt (which has been just editted slightly in what I have now) to see if you are interested.

Title: Chubby Running

Length, Draft and Language: 50k words, 1st Draft, English (a small portion is in Italian, but it's intentionally supposed to be not understandable to the reader and characters. If you do speak Italian, that would be a BIG bonus as I'd love to have someone correct my Italian grammar!)

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words):
Gretchen Strunk, 12, didn't ask to up and move to Italy at the start of middle school, but that's what happens to a military brat when the Air Force says so. But the Land of Pizza and Pasta proves to be a bad thing for an obese girl who's already self-conscious about her weight, and the kids at school have already come up with a list of unoriginal nicknames to make sure she never forgets it. To top it off, Gretchen's dad was deployed soon after their arrival in Italy, leaving this daddy's girl without her one big supporter.

On the suggestion of a trusted friend, Gretchen laces up a pair of running shoes and begins getting up early in the morning for secret runs. But will she ever be fast enough to outrun the bullies and insults? And what about that cute Italian boy and his xenophobic father? But when an international incident strikes the host town of this small military base, Gretchen will find that her troubles are just beginning...

Sub Genre & Keywords: Realistic YA Fiction

Known Issues: There are several abandoned plot lines that need to be reintegrated when I rewrite the second draft. The novel as a whole is too short, and the ending comes on VERY fast and needs to be expanded and paced better.

Critique Requested: Any and all feedback is welcome. I'd love it if a reader would call me out on bits that are inappropriate for the characters' age. Since I'm 26, I fully expect that there are some dated bits about my teenagers that are not accurate for someone in this day and time.

Critique Tolerance: High. I consider any and all criticism to be a gift, and would appreciate both the gentle and the harsh.

Experience & Goals: I've never published, but I would like to attempt to publish this novel after some cleanup. I've written a couple of other novels in the past and many short stories.

Method of Communication: NaNoMail for introductions, and then email. My novel is posted on Google Docs, and I can just send you the link and give you commenting privileges. :-)

Anything else? Disclaimers? If you don't have time to read my whole novel, I'd be ecstatic even if you just read a few pages and give me your thoughts. :-)

Title: Beware The Night

Length, Draft and Language: 72,000-odd words, English, first draft and unfinished

Brief Summary : Alice Newhall always knew she was extraordinary, but she didn't know about her powers until she started Ashyre Academy, a school for young teenagers coming into their powers. The school has a place in her past, as her long-deceased mother had once attended the prestigious school and grew into her own powers. Armed with the knowledge of fulfilling her curiosity, Alice will learn what she needs to come into her own powers. But danger lurks in the ancient corridors as a legacy dispute three generations in the making threatens to tear the student body apart. And with a single death comes a cryptic warning, to beware the night and all the remains hidden in the darkness.

Sub Genre & Keywords: supernatural teens, fantasy/mystery, cliques, power of friendship, death. There are no vampires and no supernatural creatures other than elemental-charged teens.

Known Issues: Tangents. My characters go off on them all of the time. I tried switching points of view from the main character (Alice) to another main character. I am also hopeless at judging the pace of a scene and know that it slows down significantly. I also haven't been a teenager in over a decade, so trying to step back into a girl's shoes is hard enough without the teenage issues. I'm hoping Alice is teenage-y enough!

Critique Requested: I would like a critique of the plot, as well as a critique of the characters, the tone and the pace of the novel itself. So: plot, storyline, pacing and characters. If you have any other comments, I am more than open to them.

Critique Tolerance: I would prefer constructive, but harsh would be adequate, too. If you hate it, tell me why you hate it. I'd prefer it be constructive other than "this sucks."

Experience & Goals: This is my first jump into a new genre and I am extremely nervous about sharing this with anyone. I have written NaNo for eight years now and only have one solid piece of finished work and that took two NaNos to write. I don't know if this will ever be published, but I'd certainly love someone else to look at it with fresh perspective.

Method of Communication: NaNoMail me. The draft is in Googledocs format, three chapter chunks at a time.

Anything Else? Disclaimers? : There is death in this book, as obviously there's a bit of a mystery.

Title: Anja

Length, Draft and Language: 23k words.. Its my rough draft. English. (Some Latin, but the English definition is given.)
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words)
Anja and Sven, even though they are adults and should be responsible, aren't very responsible at all, within a year after they got married, the pranks and troublemaking got worse. And it had to be because Sven wasn't always working out in the stables anymore, Or maybe because they just had more fun being torublemakers then being responsible, What ever the case may be, Anja's paren'ts were fed up with all of the mischeif, it needed to be stopped. As soon as possible, and that could only be achieved by sending them away, because they doubted they would even be able to get them to stop. After quite some thought, Queen Amelia and King Xavier decided that they would confine Anja and Sven to a cottage in the woods that was to be guarded by soldiers, which were to be the escorts for them if they wanted to leave as well. They liked it for the most part, aside from kissing the castle. It meant Anja could have a garden and Sven could do plenty of hunting. Though, they did wish that sometimes, just sometimes they could have a bit of freedom. They are Prince and Princess of Adenworth, afterall.

Sub Genre & Keywords: Fantasy, Witches,
Known Issues: Time period accuracy, It should be in Renaissance times, but not sure if it actually looks/sounds like it to the reader, its confusing, due to long nights without sleep trying to write it, it's also not in chapters.. I kinda.. got out of doing that, even tho in the beginning I meant to,

Critique Requested: I'd like critique of the plot and characters, really.. of all of it.
Critique Tolerance: Constructive, but also harsh. If you hate something, come out and say it, if something's confusing say it. Just say it. No matter how rude it could sound, it doesn't matter to me. I can deal with it. :)

Experience & Goals: This is my first NaNo, and It was a big step for me.. :) I'd like someone.. OTHER then fam to see it.. for once...
Method of Communication: NaNoMail me, Its on Yarny, so I may have to get your email to send it,
Anything else? Disclaimers? There is alot of fighting, and descriptive violence in the fighting, and many injuries. And having to deal with such.

I hope you'd like to read it, :)

Title: Next of Kin
Length, Draft and Language: just over 50k! Third-ish draft.
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): A teenage girl reads the journals of her estranged and recently deceased father, which change her relationship with him.
Sub Genre & Keywords: Contemporary, family


I'm looking for something really specific, and that is: a critiquer from Northern Ireland. The aforementioned father is a Belfast native, and although I've listened to many hours of Northern Irish people speaking, I would still like to have someone do a check for authenticity in his voice. Heck, you don't even have to read the whole book, just the parts "written" by him, which total somewhere from 20-25k.

Critique Tolerance: Considering I'm just looking for voice/dialect critique... infinite. :D

Experience & Goals: I've been writing seriously for about four years, and this is my fourth completed novel.

Method of Communication: Nano mail is fine initially, then email?

Anything else? Disclaimers?: YES, important: Hardly any of the book actually takes place in Belfast, and the Troubles are not much dealt with directly, but there is a lot about their effect on the characters. The book does not have a sectarian, religious, or political message. (Except maybe "war sucks." :P) I did my best to handle the issue with sincerity and compassion. All that said, I'm sure it will be upsetting to some readers due to the subject matter.

May be triggering on the issues of depression, suicide, PTSD, alcoholism, and violence.


If any Norn Irish folks can help me, I will be eternally grateful! I'm also more than happy to swap critiques!

Title: Sanity: Questionable
Length, Draft and Language: Around 51k, 1st draft, English (1st person with like one paragraph of 3rd person at the end)
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): Aiden is a sixteen-year-old girl who leads a fairly normal high school life, with one exception; almost every night, she travels to an alternate dimension to fight zombies. When she has a fight with her best friend and zombie-killing partner Meg, a series of events is set in motion that change her life forever.
Sub Genre & Keywords: zombies, romance, music
Known Issues: General grammar issues, discrepancies, "excitement" in the plot

Critique Requested: Pretty much the whole thing in general... mostly how the plot flows and stuff
Critique Tolerance: Constructive, but fairly harsh as well

Experience & Goals: This is my first year doing Nano, and although I've written a few poems in the past this is the first thing I've written with any sort of length to it. I plan on just doing that self-publishing thing, so I just want to improve my book for myself and a few of my close friends to enjoy.
Method of Communication: Nano at first, and then perhaps e-mail?
Anything else? Disclaimers?

There is a little bit of blood, but it's pretty mild.

Title: My Little Secret Coffeehouse
Length, Draft and Language: 20K, 1st, english
Brief Summary (not more than 300 words) Naomi thought she was just average. She had good grades and great friends and she loved music and performing. So one day when a mysterious box and envelope with a key and directions is dropped on her doorstep she decides to follow it and she ends up finding a pretty old building in the "secret" part of town. When her best friend, Hannah sees it, she has an idea to open up a secret coffeehouse- only for teenagers. And without thinking Naomi says yes, and with the help of Hannah and her two sisters, they start a coffee house. But soon the letters keep coming, and trying to deal with school, running your own coffee house, and keeping your overprotective parents from finding out may be enough to make Naomi break.
Sub Genre & Keywords:
Known Issues: some random tangents, grammar

Critique Requested: just generally plot, not grammar so much
Critique Tolerance: anything as long as its really critique

Experience & Goals: I've been writing for years, i hope to get something published
Method of Communication: internet, nano mail
Anything else? Disclaimers? nope, except it sucks

Title: Inane Verbiage




Length, Draft and Language: 51k+, first draft, English.

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words)

"All Latrina Vomere wanted to do was kill that pesky creature.

And then get on with her biology textbook and figure out just how the crap her ghost of a mother ever managed to conceive her.

And then read a little Latin, maybe find out why her father decided to name her after a toilet (as if that last name of hers wasn't already enough!), and then stare at her peridot necklace for another while, perhaps.

Although why, she honestly has no idea. It's not as if it's that pretty anyway.

And then that… insect just had to waltz so conceitedly into her life.

So now she's stuck with an infuriating jackass, a miser of a guardian, and a crazy Egyptian pharaoh (who was supposed to be long dead, dammit!) that wants to turn Earth into The Amazing Cat Planet of Ay.

And that necklace of hers? It might just be the key to saving them all."

Sub Genre & Keywords: Adventure, Fantasy and Humor. Or at least, that was what I planned for it to be.

Known Issues: rather awkward writing, lack of sub-plots and a couple of spelling mistakes I likely missed out when I was half-asleep and typing.





Critique Requested: writing style, mostly - and how the plot flows. not so much of the plot itself, really, because that itself needs fleshing out. a LOT of fleshing out. critique on characters would be good too, especially the main ones.

Critique Tolerance: as long as it is constructive, anything will do, really.




Experience & Goals: third year of nano - and still kinda stinky at it. i would say that i had the most fun writing this particular novel, though. goal-wise... well. almost everyone wishes they can get published somehow - and i'm no exception.

Method of Communication: nanomail first, then email.

Disclaimers: a lot of parentheses and dashes, a ridiculously-long epilogue - and there is absolutely no sub-plot. And overall ridiculousness. as well as the fact that i'm a terrible, terrible writer.

Title: For the Love of Valentino

Length, Draft and Language: 50,023; English

Brief Summary: at end of post

Sub Genre: Fantasy, Romance?

Keywords: queer, good vs. evil, teen

Known Issues: Verb tense is inconsistent throughout, I know.

Critique Requested: Plot. Specifically the fantasy plot. I may have focused too heavily on the romance aspect. Also, does it feel like a book 1? And any other critique (except typos, I have people on that).

Critique Tolerance: tear it apart!

Experience & Goals: This is my first novel and I would like to submit it for publication.

Method of Communication: E-mail is my preference, and I will send a copy in electronic format (please specify preference of format - .doc, .docx, .pdf, etc.)

Anything else? Disclaimers? Feedback on age appropriateness?


SYNOPSIS:

Valentino is a young teenage elf who has been enslaved. His master forces him into prostitution and assassinating, which he prides himself at being very good at. He yearns for a better life, specifically among the Khamnóirí, a group dedicated to serving the people, and protecting them from the evils that come every few hundred years, known as the Dark Siege.

When a "handsome Prince" from Rhaynland visits Valentino's town, the elf becomes determined to join him, in part because he is attracted, but also because he is intrigued by the "human noble." The prince promises to come back for the elf, and rescue him from his slavery.

Thus ensues Valentino's internal struggle, adventure, and more!

(I'll give a better synopsis if needed, I just hate giving things away.)

Title: Working Hunter

Length, Draft and Language: Around 54000-55000 words

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): Katie is a 16 year old high school junior that struggles with balancing her difficult family, school life and passion for riding horses. A car accident forces her to change her priorities and through her rehabilitation she learns to become a better friend and daughter while desperately struggling to regain her life with horses.

Sub Genre & Keywords: family, mental health, rehabilitation health, mild romance, horses

Known Issues: ending is perhaps too rushed, overly medical at times, too dark of a theme between katie's home life issues and rehabilitation. Did I develop the protagonist enough before her accident so that the reader can fully relate to her devastation? I would like to round out further the healing of the relationship between Katie and her parents. That is still something I would like to refine more.

Critique Requested: Construction - straight forward.
Critique Tolerance: I don't take things personally! Just tell me what you think and be direct!

Experience & Goals: No experience as a writer - this is my first attempt at a novel. I do not have a background in humanities - my background is purely medical but I have always, always wanted to write!

Method of Communication: nanomail and then email if you are still interested! I am extremely fast reader and definitely "have opinions" so I'm happy to swap. I would send my working draft as a .pdf.

Anything else? Disclaimers? I'm a little afraid I might be too old to relate fully to "kids these days" and that sometimes my desire to be "realistic" may bog down the plot line with too much detail that might bore a YA reader.

Thanks so much. Very excited about this - living out a dream I've had for a long time!

Oh, boy. Here I go...

Title: Moondance Rose (currently, unless I can think of something better)

Length, Draft and Language: 50,063 words including bonus scenes and features, about 47k without. First draft. English.

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): Jessa Kevlar was an average 14 year old girl, with good friends, good grades, and a good life. Then one stupid descision gets her in trouble with the law. Jessa is sent half way across the country to Kiska Ranch, a working ranch in Tentille, Montana, where juvenile delinquents go to make up for their past wrongs. On the same night that Jessa arrives, a horse is rescued and brought to Kiska Ranch. Pure white, but starved, neglected, and close to death, there seemed no hope for her. Jessa volunteered herself to rescue the horse, despite knowing the many challenges she would face. After that fateful night, things seemed to be going pretty well for Jessa. She made new friends, including daring Mila and rainbow-haired Emily. She learned to ride, something she found that she enjoyed. She worked hard, but had fun. Then one dark night, an escape gone terribly wrong threatens all that Jessa has, including her life.

Sub Genre & Keywords: Horses, Delinquents, Ranch, Adventure

Known Issues: Tenses (first and third), not a strong enough voice I think, but I'm not really sure...

Critique Requested: Everything- I want this to be... well, as perfect as possible.

Critique Tolerance: Lay it on me. It doesn't hurt my feeling, it only helps me.

Experience & Goals: First year doing NaNo, although I've been writing stories as soon as I could pick up a pencil.

Method of Communication: NaNoMail, if possible.

Anything else? Disclaimers?: I specificly put no actual swear words in this, so that it is appropriate for all audiences. Also, this is very fast-paced and adventurous. A *few* longer dialog parts, and no lengthy scenary descriptions.

Title: The Crazy Patient Unit

Length, Draft and Language: 50,174words, first, English.

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words):
Things aren’t exactly going as Na’ila planned them to. For starters, she didn’t plan to be offered deferred admission to her dream school, Southern California University. She also didn’t plan on, in a fit of frenzy brought on by her newly mangled five year plan, blowing all of her savings on a plan ticket to – of all places – Germany. And she definitely didn’t plan on living for four months with grandparents she hasn’t spoken to since before her milk teeth fell out. But this eighteen-year-old wannabe pre-med student is about to learn that life rarely goes as planned. Between changing bed pans, bathing old people, making cultural faux pas right and left, and landing her first boyfriend, Na’ila has her hands full – but then there’s a disaster at work, a major mystery involving filched pharmaceuticals, and a new best friend in danger of losing everything. Na’ila puts on her Big Girl Panties and get to work to solve the mystery, and learn a lot about life, love, and herself in the process.

Sub Genre & Keywords: YA Chick Lit Vein, Travel, coming of Age, Adventure

Known Issues: I don't know - but I want to make it awesome and submit it to agents!

Critique Requested: Everything - it's my dream to be properly published, so I want this to be amazing.

Critique Tolerance: Be as brutal as needed, just let's get this done. :)

Experience & Goals: I'e been writing stories for as long as I can remember and have several full-length manuscripts lying around and gathering cobwebs. I want that to end!

Method of Communication: NaNoMail or Email

Anything else? Disclaimers? This is meant for fans of Meg Cabot, Sophia Kinsella, etc. It has a point, but it's also meant to be mainstream and fun to read - please don't choose it if you're looking for dark fantasy or whatever.

Thanks so much!

Title: Elsbett & Robin Take On A-Nasty-Sia

Length, Draft and Language: 31,263 words, draft ten (at least), English

Brief Summary (not more than 300 words): Can two kids save their castle on their hill, its ill-tempered moat, and the mysterious Enchanted Forest around it? If you want to know, and are brave enough to hear of all their wild adventures and misadventures along the way, Elsbett & Robin Take on A-Nasty-Sia is the book for you! In the story, Elsbett and Robin live in a castle on the teetery-tottery-tip of a tall hill in a magic land where things are rarely as they seem. When their home is threatened, and their guardian, a kooky old Professor, is incapacitated, it is up to the two to save the day!

Sure, being a kid is hard. But try being a kid in a place where you seem to be the least magical of everyone. Welcome to Elsbett’s life. But when Elsbett and Robin unearth a plan to turn their castle into a luxury shopping resort, clear the Enchanted Forest, and turn their dragon, Lula, into nothing more than a glorified taxi—the audacity!—her magical abilities, or rather lack thereof, become the least of Elsbett’s concerns. Despite the obstacles that stand in their way, from living with the conniving plotter to being poisoned, Elsbett and Robin manage to save their home and loved ones. In the end, when she least expects it, Elsbett’s magical talent finally pops up and, as they say, ‘all is well that ends well’.

Sub Genre & Keywords: Middle Grade, Magic, Fantasy, Adventure

Known Issues: I don't know...I tried self-publishing, but haven't seen much success (and agents requested partials and fulls, but all ended up passing in the end)

Critique Requested: Everything!

Critique Tolerance: VERY high. You can say anything - just please make it constructive! I want this to be awesome.

Experience & Goals: I've been writing forever, I want to be properly published.

Method of Communication: NaNoMail or email

Anything else? Disclaimers? If you like books like those in 'A Series of Unfortunate Events,' please read this!