And now you're on a train http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915 Ginaxx So, brief background: My MFC has just run away from her home (*ahem* castle) and in the process, she frees an indentured servant (MMC). (Note: She’s not a princess, but she is of noble birth.) I originally had them traveling on foot the entire time, but I decided instead to stick the two of them on a train together, thus only having to walk a tiny bit. Also, they hate each other. My question is, what exactly should happen during the time when they’re on the train? Right now, all I have is arguments, my MMC continuingly reading the paper in order to ignore her, and some government officials (dunno what they’re called, guards maybe?) searching the train for them. I’m also considering some discussions that will lead into a little about their personal lives/pasts. So, what would you do if you were stuck on a train with someone you hate? Or, what would you, as a reader, like to see happen? Thank you :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 13:10:53 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117574 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117574 maggiep Well, my first thought is-why do they hate each other? Leading to, if she hates him, why did she free him? Is this a "they will end up together but they're fighting it" story line? Getting a little bit more background may help figure out what happens on the train(does he rescue her from the officials, does she give him a good slapping for sarcasm ;) ....kinda things) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 13:17:12 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117582 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117582 Ginaxx Long story short, she doesn’t like his personality (snarky, disrespectful, sarcastic, ect) or the way he treats her (and others) as “equals” (she’s a bit pretentious, can you tell? xD). And he dislikes her because she’s the main reason he got locked up in the castle as a servant. Maybe “she frees him” isn’t the right terms. I mean, she does, but he talks her into it, and she’s not happy about it at all, but agrees nonetheless. The more I think about it the more difficult it is to explain -_- And as for their feelings towards each other relationship wise, there’s really nothing there at this point. She’s technically engaged. He could never imagine being with someone like her. The do grow more fond of each other throughout the story (in an ‘I’m-not-about-to-murder-you’ type of way), and he has some feelings for her by the end, but I haven’t decided if she is going to return them yet (maybe book two?). She will defiantly be slapping him for sarcasm :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 13:30:10 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117596 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117596 Dennis Dunjinman Move to another car, unless the tickets forced them to be in the same car. Or just ride it out in the dining car and drown sorrows in frosty chocolate and fairy cakes. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 13:42:19 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117610 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117610 Ginaxx Considered car-hopping, but the ticket requires them to be in the same one. Chocolate and faerie cake sounds delicious :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 13:47:13 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117616 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117616 maggiep Reading your first post, I got the feeling he is on the sarcastic side, and she is a bit pretentious. Lol, I like that description-"I'm not going to murder you" type of way :) I think I would like to see how it goes if they had to ride it out together. As a reader, I like those tension filled scenes. Even without words, if the descriptions of their facial expressions and body language is done right, it can make for a great scene, and give a little insight into the people. I remember watching Anastasia as a kid(the cartoon version), and one of my favorite scenes is when she and Dimitri have to be in a train car together. They did not like each other at all, but it was fun to watch the sarcasm and insults fly. Idk if you've ever seen that movie, but it kinda reminds me of that. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 14:09:22 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117656 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117656 Ginaxx I haven't seen that movie in so long, but that could really be helpful! Time to Netflix it Thank you for your help :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 14:44:26 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117769 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117769 maggiep You're welcome :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 14:46:14 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117776 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117776 Ginaxx Just looked up the scene on Youtube, and it was perfect! Exactly like how my characters act! Sun, 05 Feb 2012 15:21:25 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117872 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117872 Crimmins They could do what I do when I'm on a train; they could 'people watch'? I find it interesting and fun to watch how people interact with one-another. It could be a good way for the characters to show their personality and to open up towards each other? Sun, 05 Feb 2012 15:46:35 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117934 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1117934 Kayla Rain I'm not sure how exactly *you* want the plot to unravel, but if she's run away and taken a servant with her, and there are guards going around the train, my first thought was this - when the train reaches its next stop, one of them could leave their seats for something to eat/washroom/whatnot, and run back to the other with news that a guard has spotted them and is informing the others OR the person who left might not return, and the other has to go looking for him/her and realizes he/she has been taken by one of the guards (maybe sees him/her being dragged away through the window) and has to decide what to do. If the girl is taken away, perhaps the guy goes after her because he feels indebted, and if it's the other way around, perhaps she goes after him because he has some connection to people and she needs him to get away? And while one goes after the other, it could get them to where they needed to go anyways. And if you decide to do something like the first idea, where whoever left comes back, perhaps they could leave the train and end up having to hitch hike or something? They could also perhaps meet an orphan or something. I don't know. I'm in the mood to read something about orphans tonight. Or maybe another girl/guy who has run away? Like someone who had run from the castle a while before, and they run into them? I hope I helped ! :) Sun, 05 Feb 2012 18:00:49 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118305 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118305 Kayla Rain This all reminds me of some Paper Mario game I played, where Mario is on a train and the game wouldn't let me leave until I solved I mystery ... I think the cook's stew had disappeared and I had to figure out who took it... so basically like that Agatha Christie novel. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 18:05:30 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118316 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118316 maggiep I'm glad it helped. That scene always makes me laugh, especially when she accidently slaps/hits him in the nose, starts apologizing then realizes it's him. "Oh it's just you." Lol, love that part. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 22:00:45 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118868 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1118868 Ginaxx This. :D I love your ideas for them getting caught by the guards. Basically I've decided that the girl is going to get taken, because it would be so much more interesting than if he got taken ("story of my life." poor kid.) So they're either going to get recognized by one of the guards, or arrested for not having train tickets. Probably both xD Thank you soo much!! Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:30:22 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1120444 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1120444 Kayla Rain Oh haha, you're quite welcome! :D Mon, 06 Feb 2012 18:06:53 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1120531 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1120531 WritingGeek97 Pointedly ignoring each other, like how cats act around each other sometimes. Maybe saying somebody is on the other person's side of the seat. Kicking each other. Calling each other names which are barely polite. The scene in <em>The Importance of Being Earnest</em> where the two girls are talking together over tea might help. (You can watch the whole part here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-rzDkwZIt4, and that scene is near the end. But you should watch the whole thing because it's a good story.) Maybe somebody could want to read part of the newspaper and the other won't give it up. Tue, 07 Feb 2012 21:56:02 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1123471 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1123471 Ginaxx I can see this happening during, say, a dinner scene (or something similar). Thanks :) Wed, 08 Feb 2012 14:17:56 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1124391 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1124391 Ginaxx So pretty much just acting really immature? Sounds like fun! Thank you for the ideas (and I'll be sure to watch the video later!) :D Wed, 08 Feb 2012 14:18:56 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1124397 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1124397 firelight_cinderbrick I guess they could sit far away from each other and pretend the other person didn't exist. Or unless they have to sit beside each other just not talk. Thu, 09 Feb 2012 04:15:23 -0600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1125856 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/fantasy/threads/49915?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1125856