Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Display mode:
Who's online
There are currently 3255 users online.
About | Staff | Help | Terms & Conditions | Codes of Conduct | Privacy Policy
Copyright © 2012 The Office of Letters and Light :: All posted novel excerpts remain copyright their authors.
Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
I'm aware that they existed and that men partook of their offerings, but I don't know how common it was.
Would it have been unusual for an upper class male in the 1820s/30s to not have a mistress or engage in a sexual relationship? The character I have in mind is an unmarried academic in his mid-thirties. He's nearly obsessed with his job (because he loves SCIENCE) and is quite straitlaced in compensation for his brother's overly liberal behaviors.
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Where does the story take place? That might make some difference.
What is the MC's background? Has he been married in the past (losing an adored wife would be one thing that could propel a man into chastity)?
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Most of the story is set in England, in or near London, so I imagine there are plenty of opportunities for him to engage in such relationships. The character is involved with research at the Royal Institution.
He is unmarried, although he would like to be if he could find someone to put up with him, and devotes himself to bettering his mind through his work at the RI and expanding his library. He's more likely to spend his leisure time visiting Arthur (his friend) and Arthur's siblings/cousin than going to balls or dances. I think he's a bit eccentric, socially; awkward enough for things to seem a bit amiss, but not so much that he renders himself an outcast. He's that guy, the one at a party who is fairly nice, if a bit formal or awkward, but who LOVES talking about one thing and often forgets that no one else cares about that thing.
Uh, other than that he digs horses and boxing. Pugilism clubs ftw, though I can't imagine there would be many ladies there. He also likes sketching, learning foreign languages, long walks on the beach, and kittens.
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
well... a mistress would likely be someone from his social group - a wife/sister/cousin of an acquaintance, for instance. Maupassant has this wonderful book about mistresses/lovers in Paris (Bel-Ami), though English attitudes might have been quite different and your guy might have had to be more careful on how to get involved in such a relationship and how to keep it a secret. this would even depend on the exact decade, and morale of the time, so I can't really say, however I do think Maupassant gives a great insight into these kind of relationships.
And also, his brother might know a good brothel or two? Perhaps he gets introduced into that part of society through him? Prostitution is a very different thing from having a mistress though. A mistress would require some love-relationship or another, while prostitution is more of a "business transaction" (to put it very clinical...), so it depends what you envision your character to do, or to be capable of.
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Not all mistresses were love-relationships. They were more about mutual physical satisfaction than about love. Actually some of the women involved were very much like prostitutes in that they expected expensive gifts or favors as sort of a payment. The difference being that a mistress is exclusive to one man and a prostitute is not. Mistresses or courtesans could pick and choose the men with whom they got involved; prostitutes did not have that power.
Yes, it sounds like it would have been considered unusual if he did not have a woman of some kind. But it is possible to make it part of his character. You have described him as straight-laced. It could be a moral issue for him. Or he could have loved someone once who was denied him and is devoting himself to the memories. Or he could just not have time for relationship nonsense. There are men like that even today.
You can choose whatever works best for your character.
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Mostly I wanted to know what the expectations would have been for the time, and you've definitely helped answer my question. Thank you!
Re: Mistresses/prostitution in the 19th century
Coming late to this, but from what I know of the early ninteenth century, I don't think it would be considered odd for a man to not have a woman in his life. He might need a housekeeper to keep his socks in order, and more worldly friends might nudge him about getting laid, but I don't think it was a period in which a celibate bachelor would be considered particularly strange.