Similies/Metaphors that should be shot at dawn http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945 S.Berry I didn't see anything like this any where, and I always enjoy seeing what weird similies/metaphors people come up with. You know how it is. It's late and you're frantically trying to catch up/get ahead/met your goal and the next thing you know, you're comparing clouds to elephants in white taffeta tutus. (I just did this.) What similies/metaphors have you written that you want to take out into the woods and shoot at dawn? I was trying to describe a scene in excessive detail a little while ago because I can't figure out what to have happen next. My first try: It was a clear summer’s morning at precisely fifteen minutes before eleven in the morning and puffy white clouds danced in the sky like mildly intoxicated white elephants wearing taffeta tutus. I actually kinda like this, though I doubt it's staying in in December. I decided to try again and failed even more, though it *is* more words: It was fifteen minutes to eleven in the morning. It was a perfect summer’s day with a sky like you’d find on a post card your Aunt Gertrude would send you from one of those perfect vacation destinations to write ‘Having a wonderful time. Wish you were here’, just to show off the fact she had the disposable income to take a vacation while you had to work four jobs just to afford to pay the rent of an apartment cock roaches would turn up their noses at, if cock roaches *had* noses that is. *Do* roaches have noses? Not that that would save this similie, but now I'm wondering. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 23:37:23 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_514784 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_514784 demonic_rose hahaha i love it! my metaphors are way lamer or probably dont make much sense! Sat, 05 Nov 2011 23:39:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_514821 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_514821 HeraldMage Ugh yes. I usually come up with odd metaphors/similes when I'm non-NaNoing, but this one... this one beats them all with a wooden spoon. And it's the first sentence in my novel -headdesk- "Shelly was in the process of leaning heavily in my arms to plant a couple of lovey dovey kisses to my blushing cheeks when the sound of static turns the entire school into one giant living ear." Uggghhhhh. It's hideousssssss. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 00:34:56 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_515593 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_515593 Stasisesque Someone's been watching Fantasia. :D Sun, 06 Nov 2011 01:10:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_515966 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_515966 S.Berry Surprisingly, no, I've never seen that. I did watch Dumbo about 20 years ago, though. Wasn't thinking about it at the time, however. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 01:54:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516369 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516369 S.Berry I kinda like it. It's very descriptive. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 01:55:56 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516385 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516385 Viola Alfiere "I held a package out like a woman does her dead baby" Just... no... "She started stabbing the man like she was cutting up a melon for lunch, but frantically and without order" So basically nothing like cutting up a melon at all. :/ Sun, 06 Nov 2011 09:21:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_523695 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_523695 XXRegretXX I actually laughed out loud at the second one. XD Sun, 06 Nov 2011 09:48:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524317 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524317 Lady_Indis_Dress My own late-night pathetic invention: ...flopping like a druken fish. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 09:55:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524469 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524469 Spam286 Yesterday I got so stuck looking for a simile that eventually I ended up with this just so I could get on with it. "The sun had just risen above the eastern wall of the city, peeking between two of its grand towers like a fucking simile." That probably won't make the cut when it comes time to edit. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:15:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524893 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524893 Skyrius Pfffft. That. Is. Beautiful. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:19:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524972 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_524972 Varaline Hersh Best. Similie. Ever. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:27:35 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525179 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525179 HecticZ "I fumble and crash around clumsily when it comes to stuff like that, like a drunk ballerina on crack." Possibly my favourite line. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:33:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525346 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525346 SarahNicole Those are both priceless. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:36:15 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525403 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525403 S.Berry I kinda like the first one, in an omg I shouldn't laugh sort of way. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:37:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525435 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525435 Generalist They can be lots of fun when you warp them and the characters are aware of the warping. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:37:57 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525441 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525441 S.Berry That is awesome. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:38:27 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525448 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525448 Tigerlover I was trying to explain my MC's face when she was explaining to her friend that her phone's battery had died, last week, and her friend knew that. “The battery died. Like last week.” She stated, with a face like a cat when you wake them up by poking them for no reason. ^ As you can see. It did not go well. This is why I don't use similes that often. &gt;_&lt; Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:51:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525782 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_525782 HeraldMage Every time I read it, I imagine everyone turning into a huge ear... not good when it's supposed to be serious. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 11:00:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_526012 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_526012 Stratadrake Not a simile/metaphor per se, but... [quote]He seemed to be smiling, knowing well how both sides referred to the other as equally damned.[/quote] This was me desparately trying to avoid using the ever-so-cliche phrase "it takes one to know one". Sun, 06 Nov 2011 12:21:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_528215 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_528215 Uboa The tenement, with its crippling size, felt like it was a hippopotamus, standing tall and intimidating in the middle of its dreary swamp, the bird perched on top of its back was the building's large, red roof, and the muddy runs of water and decaying plant were the sad little Americans, living and walking among this great hippo constantly but never paying attention to it, as if it wasn't an amazing, extraordinary sight that deserves complete attention. I... What? Sun, 06 Nov 2011 12:35:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_528581 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_528581 nerrdygrrl15 The sky-bus station stands directly in the middle of the space station- gleaming silver and gold towers loom above, April feeling quite like an ant in a flight suit surrounded by enormous blades of metallic grass. Whaaat. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:19:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_529824 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_529824 TheGildedFox This is not technically a simile or metaphor, but it makes me laugh. In describing an obscenely fancy, ornately carved/painted piano (in contrast to the simple piano that my FMC has) this came out: "There were so many cherubs on this piano, I thought there must not be any left in heaven." I don't know why, it just makes me laugh. Its cheesy, but I'm fond of it. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:25:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_530028 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_530028 S.Berry In my first nano, I described a character who was crying hard and trying not to, as 'sniffling like an anteater on crack'. Which somehow turned into five hundred words of backstory on the anteater. His name was Ant-ony. Right in the middle of an incredibly serious scene. I ought to dig out my second 2007 novel. That one was one long nanoism (I finished the first one and it was quite serious and fried my brain), chock full of bad similies/metaphors. One of my favorites is, "Sally dropped into the chair the way a feather doesn't." I was trying to avoid the cliche of 'dropped like a rock'. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:55:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_530847 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_530847 CaveatLector You are now my favourite person in the whole world. Except Douglas Adams, who wrote that "the ship hung in the air in much the same way that bricks don't." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 14:05:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_531149 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_531149 StaticMud "Keena watched the body burning in the fire, like a war hero of an ant, burned under a magnifying glass by God, but more epic like if it was burned by Nelson Mandela, and definitely more epic than an ant under a magnifying glass. You know what, scratch that. The body burned like a dead person enveloped in caressing fabric that covered and consumed his body like the flaming tongues of a thousand rolls of tissue paper. Or maybe the body burned like the eternal torch that rests on the top of the tallest mountain, forever a beacon of hope to the world around it, which would work if there were mountains, or if the fire would burn that high up, or if the people in the world were actually thoughtful enough to know that it meant hope but they can't because they're on the pills! You know what? Just forget it." I knew that was getting out of hand as I wrote it . . . but I couldn't stop. And it's in the middle of the saddest, most beautiful, most serious, most important scene of the whole novel. . . That's not going to make the cut in December. . . Sun, 06 Nov 2011 14:28:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_531774 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_531774 AnnieDayNow Having a head-slapping moment with a hangover: [Quote}If her head didn't feel like it was going to crumble to the ground like a dessicated taco shell, she would have smacked her forehead. [/Quote] Okay... Um, yeah. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 15:25:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_533332 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_533332 Fractured_Chaos Jada groaned, sank deeper in her lonely corner booth, and watched the crowded dance floor. It looked like a breathing, writhing, living creature that Jada didn’t want to get too close to for fear it would swallow her up and she’d never see the light of day again. Ouch. just.... ouch. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:20:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_534758 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_534758 AmayaLee "She made a frustrated sound that was akin to jungle cat trying to claw it's way up a tree to eat an irritating baboon." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:21:46 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_534790 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_534790 S.Berry Thanks. This makes my day. Douglas Adams is an amazing writer. No one can top him. If it's not a law, it should be. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:33:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535114 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535114 S.Berry Oh wow. This is awesome. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:35:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535175 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535175 S.Berry I had a day or two like that years ago when I did drink. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:36:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535194 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535194 haphazard "The idea of something as squishy as her brother being hit with something as fast and blunt-force-trauma-causing as a car was not a very pleasant thought." That's actually like, not a simile at all, is it... Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:40:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535304 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535304 CaveatLector It is, it's just very few people who know about this law. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:56:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535774 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535774 Taekwondodo For your entertainment: [quote]I had dissolved from the contemplation of the mystery woman, one that possibly didn’t even exist except from in my brain, to a critical examination of my work in less time than it would take someone who could do something really fast to do that really fast thing, really fast. [/quote] Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:56:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535775 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_535775 Emz_Sophie "He said, smiling like the Cheshire cat." This wouldn't be weird, except later on I realized that this is right before he murders a kitten... Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:00:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_535883 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_535883 midniteshadow Kylie’s eyes lit up like the nose of the patient in the Operation board game. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:07:54 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536091 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536091 Jennifermwcg And off they went, running through the partially crowded streets like a mouse does when it's trying to escape a cat or fox or whatever other animal a mouse might be eaten by. Beautiful, right? :/ Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:09:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536140 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536140 Emz_Sophie Haha awesome! Loved that game. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:10:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536147 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536147 StaticMud "He sat, stoically watching the last of the embers die out like Nelson Mandela might watch steel harden, but of course, I cannot come up with a good reason why he'd be watching steel harden in the first place which means that I've let yet another similie run away with me." *facepalm* Why does Nelson Mandela always manage to get himself in there? Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:13:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536239 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536239 Varaline Hersh Am I going to be hated when I say I have no idea whatsoever who Nelson Mandela is? Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:22:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536474 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_536474 Amelia217 Yeah, I'm seeing the giant ear, too. But leave it for the rewrite in December. I'm sure you'll find a way to say it better. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:31:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536745 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536745 Amelia217 I was testing out a smart phone at a sprint store when I read that. I laughed so much I had to wipe my eyes. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:33:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536793 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536793 Amelia217 I second this. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:34:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536813 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536813 Amelia217 At least that one's chocking up word count. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:36:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536870 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536870 Amelia217 I like that one. Better than "there were a lot of cherubs." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:37:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536915 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536915 Amelia217 That could work if it's a mosh pit, I suppose. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:40:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536993 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_536993 StaticMud No. Just Google him. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:46:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_537151 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_537151 franticfanatic The glass raining down like glitter falling during a pride parade. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:01:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_537541 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_537541 Umbellifera I like it! Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:07:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_537725 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_537725 1-plus-i "“For how long?” Rose asked, a note of worry sounding in her voice. She seemed to have grown smaller since their arrival, but in a good way, as flower becomes fruit." I have some vague idea of what I was going for there, but no. Just no. The whole paragraph deserves to be shot at dawn, or perhaps earlier. I didn't even notice the connection between 'Rose' and 'flower'... Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:22:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538121 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538121 flounce Oh God. I deleted the line, but, I recall comparing my MC to a drop of sweat that drips down the back and into the butt crack of an overweight man on a hot day. ??? I'm not sure where I was going with that. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:30:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538345 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538345 AnnieDayNow I love it! Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:34:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_538445 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_538445 flounce I found the sentence that I changed it to. "Marlon was the plaque between the teeth of humanity." I really hate Marlon. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:44:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538743 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_538743 Alix T. Dumb similes make things awesome. :) Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:45:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_538792 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_538792 3FSAEDR I have so many similies/metaphors I'm going to have problems in editing, because I'm going to need a forklift to get those puppies out! (Oh my now I'm even posting in figuritive Language!) Sun, 06 Nov 2011 22:19:35 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_543822 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_543822 isabel ahaha it's wonderful :D Sun, 06 Nov 2011 23:38:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544738 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544738 S.Berry Oh, lord. This is awesome, like something that is really awesome doing something really, really awesome. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 23:52:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544889 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544889 S.Berry I really like both of them, especially the second one. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:03:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545010 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545010 evil.mastermind I just choked on my ice cream Dx These should come with a warning. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:09:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545053 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545053 mutewitness What are these things you all speak of? Similies, Metaphors, being descriptive? Never heard of it. Hmm...after reading these, I think I better not quit my day job, and move onto writing television episodes, a play or something that involves A LOT of dialogue. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:17:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545142 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545142 S.Berry Here's another one hot off the presses: Lisa was supposed to do it, but she was up ‘til all hours sowing her wild oats like she's being paid by the bushel and drinking like a fish with clogged gills, so I have to do her work and mine, too. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:22:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545175 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545175 auberonbaker That's just perfect *laughs* Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:26:49 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545224 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545224 JesilynSmith Thirded. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:51:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545470 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545470 tajavioletta You guys, I just woke my boyfriend up with my laughing. I love this thread *so much*. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 01:00:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545538 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545538 fifi-the-fighter-pilot "Her presence would have been a blasphemy, like propping your foot up on the plinth of the David to tie a shoelace. " w a t Mon, 07 Nov 2011 01:01:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545548 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545548 SaintRyan "I was met with a startled gaze; eyes of a doe who'd watched as her buck was struck by a large truck delivering venison to a small ma-and-pa diner off of interstate 7 though I would hesitate to recommend the venison because I found it less than fresh and instead enjoyed a french dip as the au jus had a deeply hidden ingredient which sang loudly upon the pallet but was wholly unidentifiable and the bread was baked fresh and still warm from the large oven, the iced tea which I'd also consumed was very bitter and the sugar I'd added had done little to assuage this barrage on my taste buds but it did wonders for the cotton which had at the time overtaken the lining of my mouth." Not from my NaNo... but my first novel. I actually like it, because it's so ridiculous and out there. It's in the middle of a fairly tense scene too... Mon, 07 Nov 2011 01:05:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545576 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545576 S.Berry I love this. A deer being hit by a truck delivering venison... and not even good venison. This amuses me greatly. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 01:30:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545756 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_545756 CaveatLector ... I know the Nelson Mandela problem. I really do. In my old school, this happened so often that my friends and I ended up joking that Nelson Mandela was the answer to everything. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 02:40:46 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_546322 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_546322 lialle Holy crap that made my night! Mon, 07 Nov 2011 02:51:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546403 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546403 KamikazeNovElist I actually quite like that one. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 03:07:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546523 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546523 KamikazeNovElist It has a classic ring to it; very reminiscent of what what would read in a book of "Quotable Notables". I could imaging the man in your avatar having said it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 03:16:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546587 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_546587 Star-Gidget-chan [quote=AmayaLee] "She made a frustrated sound that was akin to jungle cat trying to claw it's way up a tree to eat an irritating baboon." [/quote] I totally loved it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:14:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_548587 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_548587 Star-Gidget-chan Not mine, my best friend wrote: When Rachel saw the Frisbee coming towards her, way too up her head, she started jumping like a penguin in flying classes. Of course the penguin had more chances of flying than her of catching the damn thing. I just thought it was brilliant. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:17:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_548620 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_548620 candle.city [quote]Even so, their carefree smiles echo like thunder in Silk’s eyes.[/quote] Ngak. Echoing in her eyes? It kind of makes me want to curl up into a ball and never touch a keyboard again. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:21:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_548674 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_548674 FreakierThanThou The venison one seems a little Douglas Adams to me. "Lacey smiled so politely that she thought her fake smile might drop off and start applauding Bendito's stupid responses from the floor." WTF? And another smile one, although this one I like better: "Isaac gave her a smile that was bigger than his ego." I have no idea what's up with me and smiles today. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:48:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549097 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549097 evil.mastermind That sounds like me when my PE class decides they want to play Ultimate Frisbee. XD That is awesome. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:59:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549237 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549237 auberonbaker That is just amazing. I am crying with laughter! I especially love this: [quote]like the flaming tongues of a thousand rolls of tissue paper.[/quote] Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:02:31 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_549281 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_549281 Sunerun This made me lol Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:03:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_549304 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_549304 auberonbaker [quote]I turned back to him, the warmth of his presence like a hearth at which I could thaw my aching, broken body.[/quote] [quote]His blood tasted like iron and fireworks[/quote] They're not hilarious, but they're heavy and overworked enough to warrant a mention I think LOL. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:05:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549343 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549343 taivasblue "Your teacher is here, present and accounted for...as for..." He looked at the students as if they were aliens and they were expecting a speech on why they should spare Earth from being plowed over in their interational space highway building project. Typos kept, so rational. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:10:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549433 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549433 SaintRyan Thank you! Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:21:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549571 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_549571 Gazoinks Just wrote this gem: [quote]He walked through the unchanging forest of life as the sun beat down on him like an abusive father with a baseball bat.[/quote] *Sigh* Mon, 07 Nov 2011 08:18:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550176 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550176 Kjesta First one really cracked me up, that's brilliant! Mon, 07 Nov 2011 08:39:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550264 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550264 JesilynSmith heavy and overworked or not, I really like the second one. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 08:50:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550469 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_550469 Dragonwings Please, please save the elephants wearing taffeta tutus. XD That's just awesome! Mon, 07 Nov 2011 08:59:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_550677 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_550677 AnnieDayNow Poetic, even. :) Mon, 07 Nov 2011 10:36:01 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_552547 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_552547 rosiedoodle I LOVE this. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 10:47:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_552793 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_552793 the-lonely-angel These are both hilarious. Thank you for bringing humor back into my cold, wordless November day. Brilliant. xD Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:35:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553906 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553906 Mungolian "She was like buried treasure that no one had ever drawn a map to." Ugh. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:39:01 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_553985 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_553985 andifadoubledeckerbus this is truly a beautiful sentence and you should feel proud of yourself. (even though it's sort of weird because i also have a character named marlon.) Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:43:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_554069 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_554069 lost4wards that is some kind of literary genius. You must preserve it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 11:44:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554092 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554092 Ad Nauseam I'm way behind schedule, but I already have several of these. Also, this thread has made me giggle multiple times in an intense university library. "She stepped into the room as if the floor had insulted her grandfather. " "The door fell into place and locked behind the inspector with the gravitas of a ceremonial beheading. " "While it could be argued that a certain amount of ingrained class resentment was part of modern life, like tartar buildup and hypocrisy, Tony liked rich people well enough. They reminded him of kids or well-meaning colonialists." (This is the future, by the way - I guess I'm pessimistic about developments in dental hygiene.) Mon, 07 Nov 2011 12:05:31 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554583 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554583 S.Berry I'm not sure which of these I like best... They're all so good. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 12:13:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554775 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554775 S.Berry Here's another one from my 2007 second novel. I just reread it, as we're having bad weather and my mother is driving me to distraction about it and I can't concentrate to write. I managed to wrestle my composure back into place. It was like fighting an alligator on steroids after he’s bitten one of your arms off, but I prevailed. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 12:16:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554858 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_554858 xxCoFxx [quote=S.Berry] It was a clear summer’s morning at precisely fifteen minutes before eleven in the morning and puffy white clouds danced in the sky like mildly intoxicated white elephants wearing taffeta tutus. [/quote] I love this simile haha! I say keep it... Mon, 07 Nov 2011 12:18:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554921 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554921 freakydarkstuff [quote=AmayaLee] "She made a frustrated sound that was akin to jungle cat trying to claw it's way up a tree to eat an irritating baboon." [/quote] Made me LOL so much! I always wondered how to describe that noise!! :P x Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:04:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_556086 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_556086 freakydarkstuff Not a particularly funny or originality but here is mine: I wanted this man to stop hovering around me like flies around pig s**t. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:14:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_556322 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_556322 TheGildedFox Well, that's perfect then. Thank you! I probably will keep it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 15:12:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_559301 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_559301 Blueflare I like that one - I can totally imagine what that would look like, and really, that is the entire point of a metaphor. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 15:25:32 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_559601 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_559601 Mungolian Never one for alarm clocks, Ethan jumped out of bed when it blared in his ear like angels announcing the apocalypse. I actually kinda like it, but the alliteration is iffy. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:26:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561011 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561011 S.Berry I came up with this one a little bit ago. I was trying to avoid being cliche. Still, I was nervous as a canary in an old fashioned mine shaft. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:31:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561128 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561128 S.Berry I like this. Very descriptive. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 16:32:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561147 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_561147 S.Berry “And you harbor guilt like it’s Jewish and you’re hiding it from the Nazis,” Eric said dryly. Then the characters spend the rest of the scene arguing about how offensive it is. I tried a dozen times to change it, but Eric was stubbornly insistant that's what he wanted to say Mon, 07 Nov 2011 23:45:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_570182 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_570182 Sunerun 'Caroline didn’t know what to say, she liked the way she looked, but that feeling was quickly diminishing, as if her tanks of self confidence had been punctured and they were leaking all over the floor.' Eww. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 05:40:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_572995 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_572995 Rubyfruit Posting one I did in the Nanoisms thread: [quote]Her long, black hair was curled tightly, forming two shoulder-length ponytails at each side of her head which bore a striking resemblance to a pair of drills[/quote] For context, I'm attempting to describe a character's hairstyle, which does resemble drills, as seen here: http://sonohara.donmai.us/data/sample/sample-20d750a29ef3ea219cc1aba21a0ee555.jpg Tue, 08 Nov 2011 05:45:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_573047 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_573047 supersinger473 Sediment shifted across the ground like sediment shifting across the ground Tue, 08 Nov 2011 05:46:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_573065 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_573065 Yume Nezumi I just keep looking at that and laughing over and over and over...... Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:28:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574512 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574512 MusingRandomly I'm in a full science library on campus, and you just made me snort. That is an amazing simile. KEEP IT. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:32:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574598 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574598 Yume Nezumi So I read that as "when I DIDN'T drink", as in, that day or two was the only time you didn't drink..... &gt;.&lt; Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:33:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574608 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574608 qwertz [quote]A crack like the shot of an authentic flintlock pistol from sixteen twenty six, fired with a little too much powder in the pan but thankfully none spilled, using a sparker made from a piece of well tempered stone from the particular cave located on Rathlin Island (off the coast of Northern Ireland), echoed through the bar to mark the opening of orders for food.[/quote] This is meant to be someone Apparating into a bar. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:35:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574644 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574644 MusingRandomly Not particularly funny, but this is my FMC describing how she's stomping away from the MMC "Until, that is, she realized that she sounded like a herd of elephants stamping across the savanna away from a pride of lions trying to hunt them down." Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:37:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574670 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574670 TheGildedFox And that sounds exactly like something he would say. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:37:58 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574680 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574680 MusingRandomly You need to archive this somewhere if you're going to cut it out. It's too beautiful to do otherwise. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:41:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574740 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_574740 Yume Nezumi "There was a noise like something dangerous that's not a gun" Yes, but what the hell IS it? Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:45:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574797 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574797 MusingRandomly I actually really like that. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:48:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_574859 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_574859 MusingRandomly o.O That sounds a little intense. And painful. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:49:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_574868 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_574868 MusingRandomly Bombs and grenades, what? 8D Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:51:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574908 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574908 DreZhakari This happens to me way too much when I get to an eating scene in a write-up. T_T Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:54:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574966 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_574966 nahald [quote=Ad Nauseam] "She stepped into the room as if the floor had insulted her grandfather. " [/quote] ROFL Tue, 08 Nov 2011 08:27:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575556 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575556 nahald [quote=S.Berry] Still, I was nervous as a canary in an old fashioned mine shaft. [/quote] Is it wrong that I actually quite like this one? Tue, 08 Nov 2011 08:29:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575589 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575589 Yume Nezumi I wish it was that simple. XD More like an invisible force from an unknown assailant... cause I haven't decided who/what the assailant is yet. x.x Tue, 08 Nov 2011 08:49:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575994 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_575994 Late_Papers That. Is. Glorious. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 09:40:35 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_576889 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_576889 Late_Papers This thread makes me wish my nano was more ridiculous, because all of these are wonderfully awful. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 09:45:32 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_576982 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_576982 S.Berry No, it just means there's one sentence I might not have to edit in December. Thanks. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 10:01:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577298 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577298 S.Berry More from me. Had to get up ridiculously early (for me, not the rest of humanity) for a minor family emergency (everything's fine now, though) with barely any sleep. But hey, these helped me get over 50k. My earliest time yet. She wasn’t fat by any means, but she didn’t look like the salad section was the first place she looked at on a menu either. I'm not sure, but I think I might let this one live until afternoon. Not exactly a simile or metaphor, but close enough. The next thing I knew, I was laying on top of her, kissing her like there was a panel of judges sitting in the corner and I was out of the competition if I didn’t get a perfect score -- and the French judge hated me. Nothing like out of date, out of season Olypmics comparisons for an early morning mercy killing. You stare at me like my breasts have the cure to cancer written on them in small print when you think I don't notice. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 10:22:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577666 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577666 Iago Grey I suppose this counts as a simile: During the discovering of the sodden boots, Alf had woken up and had spent a good five minutes laughing as Rhys dragged on the boots despondently and squelched around the doorway, trying to shake the feeling that there were a pair of eels eating his feet. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 10:26:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577750 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_577750 MusingRandomly So the force is strong with this one? Tue, 08 Nov 2011 11:54:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_579579 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_579579 MusingRandomly How do you stomp like that and are there lessons? Tue, 08 Nov 2011 12:05:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_579804 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_579804 Yume Nezumi Very much so. I wish I knew who this one was. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 18:57:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_588757 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_588757 Late_Papers Laufey had been waiting for the little liar to dig himself into his game of treachery deep enough that someone else finally fell into the hole and caught him tied in the strings of his own lies, like a bird caught in a Shelob’s web. Don’t ask how the Jotun king knows about Shelob. He’s a big Tolkien fan. Even though Tolkien doesn’t exist in his universe. His favorite character is the witch king. He thinks he’s a really swell guy. He also likes Denethor, but only the movie version. But he doesn’t like the whole killing himself over his disappointment of a child, though. Laufey thinks that’s dumb. He prefers to ignore that and assume Denethor was shot by the orcs in the battle or something. This is so completely ridiculous. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 21:16:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_591663 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_591663 Anba I love this thread. [quote]He stared at the glass as if I'd handed him a dead toddler.[/quote] Wait. WHAT? (Yeah, I really wrote that. I just can't believe it myself ...) [quote]»You're kinda cute. Not that way cute, more like a sad, clumsy, little puppy which is looking for its mommy and doesn't know she's already dead.«[/quote] Yeah, thanks for the compliment. NaNo seems to bring out my creepy side. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 13:22:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_603948 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_603948 S.Berry Her biceps were harder than calculus after a bottle of tequila. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 22:37:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_613983 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_613983 Acte From 2010! "He ripped into his premium grade gas station burger like a butcher who’d been living with a funny vegetarian aunt for the weekend. " Thu, 10 Nov 2011 01:50:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_615633 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_615633 CaveatLector I just read this in Wheatley's voice. This only made it funnier. Thu, 10 Nov 2011 02:36:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_615926 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_615926 RedAndy54 This was one I penned on my first day of NaNoing: "His face was a mixture of trepidation and shame, as if he'd been caught rifling through an underwear drawer that wasn't his." Thu, 10 Nov 2011 05:21:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_617173 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_617173 hknamida "The chafing of the bags against her knees was not an inconvenience. It was the sweet caress of loyalty." What? I don't even— Thu, 10 Nov 2011 08:10:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619153 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619153 hknamida I think that one is pretty good, though I suppose it depends on the context. Thu, 10 Nov 2011 08:11:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619166 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619166 freakydarkstuff I would remember that sight for the rest of my life, the flames dancing behind his eyes, the sadist look of pleasure at the forefront as he lapped up the fear radiating from me like the heat radiates from the flame. How many times can I write a form of "radiate" in a sentence?? Only way I couldve made it worse was to put "the fear radiating from me like the heat radiates from the radiator." *facepalm* Thu, 10 Nov 2011 08:24:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619379 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_619379 S.Berry She had just enough junk in her trunk to give her nice curves without her ass looking like two loaves of bread jostling for space in her pants. Loaves. Of. Bread. In her pants. Yeah. Definitely being taken out and shot at dawn. Fri, 11 Nov 2011 01:17:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_635631 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_635631 smithk654 I actually know an Eric who say things just like this... Eerie... Fri, 11 Nov 2011 06:26:47 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_637938 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_637938 S.Berry There was a guy in a gorilla suit on stage, holding up signs and dancing around like a guy in a gorilla suit doing a very bad King Kong impression. Definite simile fail. Clara came running out looking madder than a cat tossed in a barrel of water. If you've never seen this, believe me, it's really, really, really mad. It *was* a guy -- a bald guy who was fifty if he was a day wearing clunky black rimmed glasses and sporting a hefty five o’clock shadow and sweating like he’d run a marathon to get to the whore house first. Fri, 11 Nov 2011 13:11:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_644245 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_644245 FreakierThanThou Here's one of mine. (Note: This is translated from Spanish, Basil is ten and has just given a name to a Blu, which is an alien that doesn't have a name pronounceable to humans and Peligro is Spanish for Danger.) "Peligro," said the Blu in a tone that sounded like he was testing out the name as someone would taste a strange dish that had appeared in a restaurant instead of what they had actually ordered. "Yes, I like that. Peligro." "Peli?" suggested Kalina. "That sounds more like a name." "Peli," said Peligro in the same tone. Now along with the strange dish, a drink had arrived, with large bubbles, a bizarre color, which smelled like a dead rat. He was suspicious, but the unidentified food had been so good that he wanted to at least taste this drink to give it the benefit of the doubt. That started okay, but it sort of got away from me. Fri, 18 Nov 2011 04:55:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_752303 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_752303 Oregon_Rain Here's a sentence that won't remain in the final cut: Before long the level of awkwardness reached a jr. high dance status and Jim would break his side window and use the shards for gouging out his eyes, the mid-sized car pulled into a slot in a parking lot next to a large truck driven by a woman whose greatest transportation bulk is her fat children and the groceries needed to sustain their pudgy lives and a Jeep with enough traction to sustain itself on different terrain, like pavements or that darker, newly serviced pavement. I just really like describing children with "pudgy little lives." Sun, 20 Nov 2011 01:38:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_777143 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_777143 Maybedeadcats "Tom ignored the messages from Jennifer, because he had dealt with quite enough teenage girl drama for the day. At least, he though Emma Evans was a teenage girl. She certainly looked like one, despite the fact that she acted like a ninety year old woman who suffered from simultaneous hemorrhoids and irritable bowel syndrome." Someone's a little grumpy, aren't they? Sun, 20 Nov 2011 06:27:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_778727 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_778727 H This isn't from my NaNo, but my friend has a tendency to write that things "Come out like new born babies." I'm afraid it'll show up in my novel... Sun, 20 Nov 2011 08:07:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_779307 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_779307 Lippytoes Oh, this is amazing. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 14:31:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_783492 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_783492 Lady_Indis_Dress ROFL! Would you consider keeping that in? Sun, 20 Nov 2011 15:52:27 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784476 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784476 Lady_Indis_Dress I'm actually really liking most of these. They're funny and they kind of make sense. Are you sure this isn't just pure genius on your part? Sun, 20 Nov 2011 15:53:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784489 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784489 abscg613 Love your Icon :) Sun, 20 Nov 2011 15:54:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_784497 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_784497 Lady_Indis_Dress I once deliberately wrote a bad piece of fiction (for laughs) that included this phrase: "The crowd parted like a crowd of people who part." Sun, 20 Nov 2011 15:56:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784526 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_784526 ReadySetWrite This thread is making my day. I have never had to stifle so many giggles at once. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:29:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786394 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786394 ReadySetWrite You know it needs to be shot at dawn when you need a simile to describe a simile :D Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:37:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_786500 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_786500 ClassicMoon The mechanic suddenly felt a since of guilt wrap around him like a smothering blanket. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:37:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786504 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786504 S.Berry Sure. I'll think about it. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:46:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786617 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786617 buhbyebirdie I don't know exactly what the hell I'm going for here but I find it pleasantly baroque and plan to use it to make sure my beta readers are still paying attention: He couldn't shake the feeling that something beautiful and precious was being eroded away with every second she was in her debutante costume. Her natural state, he suspected, was deep in the ocean luring sailors to their deaths among the reefs and collecting pirate treasure. He wondered if Will would ever appreciate this amazing thing he had a hand in killing. <em>Did the Visigoths ever appreciate the majesty of Rome?</em> Yes, that's right, I just compared an unfortunate engagement to the sack of Rome in 410. You're welcome, posterity. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:47:01 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786620 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786620 S.Berry If you want to think I'm a genius, I'm good with that. Sure, let's go with that. Thanks. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:49:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786650 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786650 S.Berry I like this. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 18:49:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786663 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_786663 Lady_Indis_Dress You're very welcome! Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:23:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_787132 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_787132 S.Berry Here's some more from me: There was a shot and she grabbed at her shoulder, swearing like a sailor denied leave for the tenth time in a row. She was madder than a sack full of wet cats I’d be so deep in the bottle that even the Chilean miner rescuers couldn’t pull me out. Syd said, looking like she didn’t know whether to cry or commit murder. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:42:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_788126 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_788126 abscg613 People separated into groups, and though the plaza became noisy again, it wasn't at the level of fifteen firecrackers inside a tank which was revving through a heavy-metal concert, as it had been before. Can we say terrrrrrible anyone? but don't worry *as if you were* no cuts cuz I am SOS far behind :P Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:44:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_788149 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_788149 Oregon_Rain Thanks. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 22:24:54 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_789117 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_789117 drummergirl325 From last year's novel: [quote] It was amazing how college students tended to congregate around a guy with a guitar, like ravenous pigeons descending on a single discarded french fry at an outdoor restaurant. [/quote] Sun, 20 Nov 2011 22:40:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_789219 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_789219 Syri_Rey4711 I love this. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:37:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789539 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789539 mandiiminx [quote=Spam286] "The sun had just risen above the eastern wall of the city, peeking between two of its grand towers like a fucking simile." [/quote] LOL. Put it in adopt a line. I would adopt it. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:47:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_789613 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_789613 mandiiminx [quote=Stratadrake] Not a simile/metaphor per se, but... [quote]He seemed to be smiling, knowing well how both sides referred to the other as equally damned.[/quote] [/quote] I like it :) Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:48:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_789619 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_789619 mandiiminx Well they do look like drills! I'd probably say, 'Attached to either side of her head like two spirally... somethings'. Much better, right? ... Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:57:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789690 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789690 mandiiminx You're a sick and twisted individual ... Be my best friend?? :D Sun, 20 Nov 2011 23:59:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789701 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789701 mandiiminx I should add something like this to my novel, but replace 'after a bottle of tequila' with 'if you are Mandi'. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 00:00:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789706 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_789706 wildchloe That is beautiful and I kind of want to steal it. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 02:04:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_790248 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_790248 Lady_Indis_Dress I really like these. I'm sticking with the idea that you are a genius and you just don't realize it. :o) Mon, 21 Nov 2011 06:18:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_791319 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_791319 FreakierThanThou I love yours, drummergirl. It's so true. One of mine: "She laughed like laughter was reverse food and she had to get it out of her body to survive." Admittedly, the narrator is an alien in this scene. I'm not sure if that's an excuse or not. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 10:28:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_793269 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_793269 .ethereal. I may as well face it, this novel is going nowhere XD [quote]It was a dark and stormy night, like a scene from a horror movie when ominous music plays as the hero cautiously makes his way to the abandoned house on top of the hill and the bare black branches creak softly in the slight wind that suddenly gives way to a raging thunderstorm as a bolt of lightning comes down from the sky to strike the house. Yes, it was definitely like that.[/quote] It...got away from me a bit. *grins sheepishly* At least it's words... Mon, 21 Nov 2011 10:43:08 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_793432 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_793432 Diminished7th The ice dragon that had been imprisoned in the snow globe looked at Charlotte and hissed rudely. Then it flapped its small, bat-like wings and leapt off of Blayze’s hand to resume zipping around the car like a mosquito full of helium. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 12:50:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_794867 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_794867 Alias Cyborg "puffy clouds like dandelion haeds blowing away or sleek white cats dancing in sleek white poofs undergoing metamorphosis." EPIC FAIL. I'm keeping it though. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 13:08:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_795049 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_795049 S.Berry Can I quote you on that? I know a couple of folks who might disagree. Thanks. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:10:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801390 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801390 S.Berry No, I don't think it's terrible. I like it. It's very descriptive. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:11:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801397 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801397 S.Berry Here's a couple more of mine: I was happier than a cannibal candle maker at a Weight Watcher’s convention. Don't worry if you don't get that one at first. It's a very cerebral sort of bad. She scrambled up the ladder as nimbly as something that’s really nimble, like a monkey leaping over a candle stick. Simile fail followed by slightly less simile fail. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:15:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801416 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801416 Alias Cyborg YOUR ICON IS EVIL!!! EVIL, I TELL YOU!!! EVIL!!! Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:26:47 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_801496 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_801496 Alias Cyborg Can I steal the Clara one but with a different name? I know, I know, this isn't the adoption society, but THAT SIMILE IS PURE GENIUS!!! Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:32:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801530 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_801530 Alias Cyborg "clouds like white cotton candy if such a thing even existed Calder did not know if it did." Sad. I am not sure if this will make the cut. Mon, 21 Nov 2011 22:39:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_801572 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_801572 Viola Alfiere My mom kicked me out of the room because I couldn't stop giggling at some of these. (sorry if that's rude) Here's some more bad ones of mine: "Taro lay in a heap right in front of the door like dirty laundry, but bleeding dirty laundry. " "Blood squirted from his wound like tomato juice springing from a squeezed juice box. " "An operator answered the phone, her voice crackling over in a *sound’s equivalent of a picture* of calmness." "A look like the men had just discovered that they were married to the same woman who also happened to be a vegetarian alien crossed their faces." The worst part is that these are all from the same day of writing! :( Tue, 22 Nov 2011 09:06:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_804930 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_804930 Lalina2005 This thread made me laugh so hard that I decided to rifle through my story to add in... and discoverd I have an unnatural aversion to similes and metaphors! I tell you, none could be found! WTH?? 0_o Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:17:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805566 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805566 Alias Cyborg "Dancing like angelic fairys in totally melodramatic movements to an odd beat of time" and this is in a SONG!!!! probably it'll get cut in december, but it is a lot of words so I am keepping it. Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:26:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805650 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805650 Alias Cyborg KEEP THE LAST ONE! KEEP THE LAST ONE! KEEP THE LAST ONE! It is genius! Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:28:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805669 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805669 Lady_Indis_Dress Well I think you're a genius at unique description writing. I can't really vouch for your brilliance in other areas of life. Still, yes, feel free to quote me. :o) Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:55:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_805940 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_805940 Lady_Indis_Dress I think the dandelion heads part is really good actually. Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:56:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_805952 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_805952 KazeTaco So, I was trying to make metaphors that didn't sound so frilly, and THIS came out: [quote]...the strange concoction writhing like disturbed cornstarch.[/quote] What? I mean, yes disturbed cornstarch is really FREAKY if you see it but-- would the average person know that? Would people just think that I spent too much time in the laundry? I mean, I... couldn't I have mentioned dark tendrils or something? CORNSTARCH?! Tue, 22 Nov 2011 10:59:47 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805988 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_805988 pageleaf This is...actually kind of a fantastic simile. :D I guess it all depends on what your novel's tone is, but if it's supposed to have a humorous narrative style, then this is kind of perfect. :D Tue, 22 Nov 2011 11:05:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_806034 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_806034 S.Berry Sure, I don't mind. I don't think I can copyright the reactions of wet cats or barrels of water anyway. Though wouldn't it be awesome if you could? Tue, 22 Nov 2011 18:11:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_811161 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_811161 S.Berry I'd say I was brilliant at just about everything, but that would sound conceited. Conceit isn't one of my character flaws. Tue, 22 Nov 2011 18:22:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_811304 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_811304 Julia Caesaris I don't use similies or metaphors that much, but I did manage to produce this today: Brown eyes crinkled up into little bows, the woman said, grinning... Interestingly enough, it's not really possible to make your eyes into bow shapes. Just doesn't happen. And since we already know she's grinning... Tue, 22 Nov 2011 19:44:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_812387 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_812387 SweetJuly I've seen cornstarch move when you drop water into it, so I get it. And I really like this one. It should stay in. *thumbsup* Tue, 22 Nov 2011 20:33:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813055 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813055 SweetJuly I really like how you continue the weird little metaphor. It's cool. Please keep it! Tue, 22 Nov 2011 20:36:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_813101 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_813101 SweetJuly "The [concrete] swam up even to the bases of the trees and clung there like locks of stiff hair, lapping at the bark." ...huh...? Tue, 22 Nov 2011 20:44:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813229 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813229 ClassicMoon Michael wondered if it was towards him for betraying them, or towards Thethetedu for the lies he was spouting like a volcano..... His voice came through and made Michael’s stomach feel as though someone had taken a match to it. eek, these are terrible. &lt;_&lt; Tue, 22 Nov 2011 21:30:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813837 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_813837 JessieBlue743 I like this one too, it makes sense to me. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 00:16:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_815320 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_815320 Lady_Indis_Dress That is delightfully nonsensical! I dare you to leave it in, with the "...huh...?" included. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 06:40:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_817449 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_817449 Lippytoes [quote]I dare you to leave it in, with the "...huh...?" included.[/quote] Haha, this! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 13:33:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_821849 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_821849 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames "My name in dragon would be incredibly difficult for a human to pronounce. It sounds rather like a goat and a cat tap dancing in a horse driven cart, on a steamboat full of explosives." Ok... my book takes place in a world where they have not invented steamboats. There is probably not tap dancing either. Sometimes, my writing gets away from me. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 15:54:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823431 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823431 Lady_Indis_Dress I would pay money to see a goat and a cat tap-dancing in a horse-driven cart on a steamboat full of explosives! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:15:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823664 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823664 Alias Cyborg The "EPIC FAIL" was more referencing the part about sleek white cats danceing in sleek white poofs undergoing metamorphasis. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:21:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_823742 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_823742 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames I do sometimes wonder what it sounds like... Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:29:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823810 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823810 Zoey2070 'Smoke started coming out of the ruins of the house, and I could clearly see every room of the house, like I was viewing it from a helicopter and the roof being peeled off like the skin of a potato.' If it's on fire, and there's smoke, you can't really see every room clearly, and if you're on a ground, it's not going to look like you're viewing it from a helicopter, and potato skins don't usually come off like that. On the plus side, it enabled me to go onto a 150 word monologue about potatoes. You know, while you're watching your senile's mother's old house burn with her inside. And that 150 word monologue was followed by 'okay, back on topic.' And then a five hundred word rant about how time travel can't work. I don't have very many similies or metaphors. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:31:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823836 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823836 Axael "High stacks of books floated to the ceiling like clouds, dispensing their knowledge like rain to the eager mouths of the students opening their brains on the carpet below." KILL IT. KILL IT WITH FIRE. D: Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:34:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823861 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823861 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames Oh no... another one. It wasn't meant to be a simile, but it was. "I was sleep-deprived and sorely in need of a good meal, because last night’s dinner had tasted like dirt. Actually, dirt probably had much more flavor, but the little flavor it did have was like dirt. It was as though the meal had been grown from dirt or something. It tasted like some sort of weird grain. And rice. Plain rice. Yechh. That’s probably what it was." i can't believe that this morning I wanted to add more simile, before I saw this thread. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:34:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823863 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_823863 Lady_Indis_Dress I'm so worn out I can't even tell if this is terrible or genius: "...eyes of gray and green like soft moss on northern curtain walls." Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:06:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_824174 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_824174 Lalina2005 I found a simile!! I don't know if I want to shoot it at dawn so much as give it a violent shake... 'What was even stranger still was the fact that even though the circumstances were odd at best, he found himself being charmed by her smile. As if they were in the middle of some social place like a bar, instead of where they were now.' Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:38:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_824573 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_824573 ReadySetWrite I just wrote one! My first one ever! (at least in this book. I seem to be simile/metaphore allergic) “Oh, right, sorry,” said Jazz, wrenching her attention back like an elephant reluctant to go to the vet. That would be very hard indeed, to wrench an elephant to the vet... Wed, 23 Nov 2011 18:45:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_825389 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_825389 serena_catchingfireflies "Homes were interspersed throughout, clinging to the trees like a bees nest to a branch. " wait.... aren't branches parts of trees? And theres some sort of grammar fail in there too... Wed, 23 Nov 2011 20:05:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_826152 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_826152 serena_catchingfireflies [quote=ReadySetWrite] That would be very hard indeed, to wrench an elephant to the vet... [/quote] I had to laugh at this... Wed, 23 Nov 2011 20:05:49 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_826164 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_826164 KythingToWrite Go Douglas! That whole scene where Arthur and Ford are watching the cricket match and Slartibartfast appears (in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, I think) is full of wonderful similes. And, of course, tea. Douglas Adams is the first person in the universe to accurately describe the true power of tea. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 12:13:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_832296 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_832296 SweetJuly Wow, I've never been dared before! Okay, just for you guys. I'll add in the "huh" because that's kind of in-character for my narrator anyway. Plus, that's one more word. :D Thu, 24 Nov 2011 19:41:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_836097 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_836097 PenMaster [quote=Spam286] Yesterday I got so stuck looking for a simile that eventually I ended up with this just so I could get on with it. "The sun had just risen above the eastern wall of the city, peeking between two of its grand towers like a fucking simile." That probably won't make the cut when it comes time to edit. [/quote] Duuuuuude I burst out laughing at that so much I scared a family member xD I'd keep that one tucked away just in case. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 20:52:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_836821 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_836821 KythingToWrite Here are some I produced incredibly late at night yesterday: "“The map is glowing?” said Mark, curiouslty filing him up helium in an inflated balloon like the lead one that the Mythbuters were making on TV today in the evening. Yes, I was watching it when I was supposed to be writing. I only watched for five minutes though! I’ve watched that episode around fifteen time s I think. I shall not correct that because it gives me one more word. " I've not changed anything, I swear. Even the spelling mistakes have been left in. This resulted in a 100-word rant on how I need either sleep or caffeine and how there's no Pepsi in the house and how it's too late to make tea. It was then followed by, "Okay, back to work now!" “What do you think?” asked Rita, speaking for the first time. All eyes turned to her like they do the TV at the end of the boring comericail when that hot actor appears on screen again." Disregarding the fact that I can't even spell 'commercial' correctly, where did that hot actor come from? WHERE? I don't even want to know. Rita smiled, her wide, carefree, smile that made her already normally deep dimples stand out like craters on the moon, epecially if they were flourescent pink craters on a pitch-black moon (erm kind of a bit unusual and sort of weird but never mind on with the quest story scene blah blah blah). Again, nothing changed, Looking back, it's more than unusual. It seems kind of like a disco moon... Make of that what you will, fellow wrimos. I have concluded that I do not write well when I am sleep-deprived. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 22:37:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837617 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837617 Paper Novas I don't use similies or metaphors much but I have written some pretty funny stuff, especially when I'm low on sleep. For example: "After a while we had all gotten hungry enough to chance eating someone." (Yes I did mean something not someone, but somehow my characters ended up turning into canibals for about 30 minutes before I decided to read over my work and found the typo xD) "I didn't hesitate before handing over my hand, which she grabbed in her hand, handing her other hand for me to take in my other hand." (Wow the things I write when I'm sleep deprived.) Thu, 24 Nov 2011 22:48:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837727 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837727 S.Berry I like these. And that lead balloon was awesome. I want to be a Mythbuster when I grow up. (Yes, I know I'm already grown up. Don't spoil the dream.) Thu, 24 Nov 2011 23:07:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837828 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837828 S.Berry Yay for accidental cannibalism! And I think, possibly, that it spread with all the exchanging hands. Eating your own hand is too creepy and wrong even for a cannibal. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 23:09:46 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837845 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837845 S.Berry “But me trying to write fiction is like handing a monkey a typewriter: you might get the odd interesting sentence, but only completely by accident," Gail said cheerfully. What makes this more amusing is that Gail is supposed to be a brilliant singer-songwriter. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 23:15:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837870 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837870 mayaah Hey, I know I have a lot of awful analogies in my novel, but I'm kind of too lazy to find them all, so here's a list of the Worst Analogies Ever Written in a High School Essay instead: -Her eyes were like two brown circles with big black dots in the center. -The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon. -McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup. -Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze. -He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree. -Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph. -John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met. You can find more here: http://www.etni.org.il/farside/analogies.htm Thu, 24 Nov 2011 23:34:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837981 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_837981 Julie Randolph Stop that, dammit! You're going to wake my children. *snort* Fri, 25 Nov 2011 01:52:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_838553 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_838553 S.Berry Ooh! Thanks for the link. I'll have to check that out. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 02:36:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_838735 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_838735 S.Berry Here's another couple of mine I just wrote, and I think this is a sign I need to stop writing for the night and go to bed. These are both about the same guy, once in narration and once in dialogue. I'm so tired I'm not even sure if the first one makes any sense. He was about as useful as pissing on a grease fire, and about as dangerous to the world around him due to sheer incompetence. The manager is about as useful as a bikini in a hurricane. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 02:38:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_838749 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_838749 Lady_Indis_Dress Songs are rather different from books. I write both, so I can tell you that line actually works (if she's trying to write a book, that is). I still think you're secretly brilliant. I love your similies. Let's hear it for monkeys with typewriters! Fri, 25 Nov 2011 05:36:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839425 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839425 Lady_Indis_Dress I love that link. Hadn't seen the brick wall one before. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 05:37:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839430 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839430 Lady_Indis_Dress I'm not sure if the first one makes sense either. But the second one is awesome! Fri, 25 Nov 2011 05:38:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839438 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_839438 S.Berry I write both, too. Completely different skill sets in actual practice, but if you haven't tried to write both, it doesn't seem like it should be. Well, okay, I more write poetry than actual songs. I have no musical ability whatsoever. My cousin does the musical parts. Gail was saying she'd tried to write prose and it didn't work at all. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 11:33:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_842098 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_842098 S.Berry I just woke up, so my brain isn't quite working yet, but I think the idea was liquid just makes grease fires worse and out of control grease fires are really dangerous. Or something. Yeah... I think that one needs to be shot. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 11:37:52 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_842137 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_842137 Luminosity.of.a.Shadow "[...]thick, soft carpets that would have made a sheep weep for envy. " ...I'm not sure if I like it or want to weep for stupid. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 12:03:32 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842390 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842390 Lady_Indis_Dress I like it. Particularly good if it's wool carpet. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 12:52:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842817 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842817 polkadotsandpunch My MC on finding old chewing gum in her pocket: "It was finely coated in what appeared to be the stuff boys had between their toes." Fri, 25 Nov 2011 12:59:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842879 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_842879 ElliMelody "My world was crushed like orange juice." My MC describing her feelings when she finds out all of her friends ended up in the hospital in critical condition when her sister was showing the same symptoms. Sat, 26 Nov 2011 13:33:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_854268 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_854268 ReadySetWrite The beds on the train that my three MCs are taking. And it turned out that the beds were not very comfortable. That might be putting it gently. The beds were about as comfortable as sleeping on a pile of loaded weapons. Not very comfortable to begin with, but then you have to worry about whether or not they would go off. The beds were bunk beds, and every time Jazz moved, they would groan like they were about to collapse. This did not make for a peaceful night’s sleep. Sat, 26 Nov 2011 13:49:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_854444 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_854444 Anoulie Ohne nachzudenken, richte sie sich auf – das Wasser rann an ihrem Körper herunter wie ein schaumiger Fluss – und küsste ihn sanft auf den Mund. (If this is worded weirdly, it's because it's a literal translation from German. The girl is currently in a bath tub.) Without thinking, she straightened up - the water ran down her body like a foamy waterfall - and kissed him softly on the lips. Water that is like... water? And also foamy? Oh dear. I changed it to river, but it still sucks. *highlights in a to-be-edited color* Sat, 26 Nov 2011 22:35:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_859893 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_859893 Anoulie Whoops. Kept the original German. Don't worry about it. Sat, 26 Nov 2011 22:35:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_859897 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_859897 Anba Haha, thanks a lot ... I guess! :D Sat, 26 Nov 2011 23:20:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_860205 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_860205 ReadySetWrite It was a tall, muscular man with a bushy beard and way of staring at you until you were reduced to a small, weak, pile of pudding. Despite all this, he still didn’t have the guts to try and escape Um what? No, no, no, and NO!! How did that even sneak into there? People being reduced to pudding? I mean, I suppose if you reduced a human like you do in cooking it would be smaller and thicker, but still no. NO! This thread has been too quiet. Start posting some more things! Sun, 27 Nov 2011 18:26:17 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_869178 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_869178 Lady_Indis_Dress Here. Very tired and just wrote this: Jacqueline stopped and stared at him as if he had just sprouted wings and a dorsal fin. Sun, 27 Nov 2011 20:28:57 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_870511 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_870511 S.Berry That would certainly make *me* stop and stare. I like it. Sun, 27 Nov 2011 22:07:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_871650 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_871650 Attraversi My MC on playing guitar late at night because she couldn't sleep. As she begun to play she felt herself calm, it was as if each note was a soldier that fought back the evil thoughts that threatened to invade her mind. Sun, 27 Nov 2011 22:59:24 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_872111 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_872111 S.Berry I love this. One of my MCs is a musician and I really wish I'd thought of this. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 00:30:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_872600 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_872600 Lady_Indis_Dress I do too in a general sense but use of the term "dorsal fin" didn't start until more than 300 years after the story I'm writing. I cannot for the life of me think of a good alternative. Horns would be too cliche. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 06:00:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_873940 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_873940 FreakierThanThou "Oh, I'm sorry," Isaac retorted, in a voice less sincere than he was short. Yeah... I've never established him as tall before. Also that sentence... ugh. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 13:47:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_878078 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_878078 S.Berry That is a problem. No, horns wouldn't sound right. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:18:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881447 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881447 Lady_Indis_Dress LOL. I didn't need to know his height to find that funny. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:48:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881871 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881871 StaticMud "His manner had an sense of superiority to it like he believed that he was talking to some intoxicated, homeless pond scum that had managed to get into the spaces in the wavy-patterned tread on the bottoms of his impeccably polished leather shoes and he was just waiting, and looking forward to, the moment he could scrape it off on the door mat at the entrance to his luxury palace." Oh . . . the one that got away . . . Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:54:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881939 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_881939 liadan_celt "Miranda was as pale as her sister, but had golden-brown hair (like good toast, the General had always thought) and brown eyes." Tue, 29 Nov 2011 14:02:58 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_890757 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_890757 TKcloud9 The gravity's off in the ship, and my MC has awoken on the ceiling. "She launched herself at the bed, and instead of hitting the gravity field and "falling" on the mattress, she bounced right off again and slammed onto the ceiling, spread - eagled as a pole - axed falcon." What? Seriously? Tue, 29 Nov 2011 20:46:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_895726 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_895726 Lightshow She was beginning to think that she didn't want to understand it. That the truth was worse than not knowing, but events had been set into motion and now there was no way to stop them. It was like a boulder rolling downhill toward a fragile, straw hut with no way to stop it. Or like a game she had played online as a child where you had to direct a snowball that was rolling downhill, picking up more and more speed and growing bigger and bigger as it picked up objects and animals until it became an enormous, rolling, mass of snow and odds and ends. The game that she was referring to exists on Neopets. I think I have offically reached the so-tired-that-I'm-getting-loopy phase. Tue, 29 Nov 2011 20:49:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_895776 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_895776 S.Berry I was pretty sure the woman’s cracker was on the South Pole and her cheese was on the North Pole. She just had that crazy, dead serial killer look about her. A shot rang out, making me wince, and she loosened her hold to clutch at her shoulder, swearing like a longshoreman who’d just stubbed his toe. I wanted to see her, just when I was looking less like six week old death. I was pale, shaky, and sweating like a monsoon. These two were one right after the other. She's having a drug reaction to the anti nausea medicine she was given for a concussion after tussling with the above nutcase. Shortly thereafter is the scene in my excerpt. I was more nervous than a lamp lighter in an munitions cache. (fire works factory? Dynamite factory?) This was my last sentence the other day. I think I was falling asleep. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 00:36:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_897768 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_897768 rachum_05 I almost lost it laughing, and then I had to interrupt my best friend's precious Nano-ing time to share it with her, and she ALSO cracked up. This one's my favorite, for sure! Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:11:49 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_897957 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_897957 rachum_05 I think it's beautiful! But I am also worn out. So take my adoration with a grain of salt! Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:29:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_898032 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=5#forum_thread_comment_898032 rachum_05 The first one is PURE. GENIUS. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:34:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898052 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898052 rachum_05 "She liked his voice. It was somehow smooth and rough at the same time, like butter with sand in it." ....Um, say what now? Wed, 30 Nov 2011 01:35:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898055 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898055 S.Berry Thanks. Although I just realized I left out a word. I meant 'dead eyed'. A dead serial killer probably doesn't look that crazy. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 03:23:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898506 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898506 tajavioletta Tension mounts like a stallion humping the sun. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 04:06:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898709 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_898709 Lady_Indis_Dress Love these. Especially the first two and the last one. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 06:20:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_899586 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_899586 S.Berry Thanks. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 13:01:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_903965 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_903965 Lady_Indis_Dress I think this is wonderful actually. It makes you stop and think about what butter would be like with sand in it. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 16:52:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_907798 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_907798 ReadySetWrite I love this. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 17:53:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_908675 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_908675 Lollem I have so much love for this one. I can't stop laughing. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 18:03:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_908815 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_908815 DanielleM Tears. Can't breathe. Going to wake the baby, I'm laughing so hard. Help. Wed, 30 Nov 2011 20:07:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_910540 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_910540 DanielleM Me too! Thu, 01 Dec 2011 08:37:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_915434 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=2#forum_thread_comment_915434 DanielleM I love all of these! Especially the first one. Thu, 01 Dec 2011 08:38:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_915439 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_915439 DanielleM Oooh.. here are mine: "She looked like a haunted house display gone wrong." which, considering this is in reference to finding a dead body in the bushes, I think is ok. "People started looking at Katie funny, like she was a black cloud, wondering what she was doing to make people flee suddenly and unhappily." Pretty sure that has a misplaced modifier. "It looked just like Law and Order." in reference to the police station interrogation room "The only people that remember seeing you are a group of guys who were golfing and said they saw you hightailing it out of there, pushing a baby carriage like your rear-end was on fire." random hyphen "If I find one iota of evidence that you and Violet didn't get along, if you kicked her dog or ran over her toe or knocked a leaf off her favorite tree, I'm going to be all over you like white on rice. Right now you smell guilty to me and my nose is never wrong." i really wanted to think of something better, less cliched, than "white on rice" but i had no time. Anyone have any suggestions? "And yet, when she needed to do something like say no thanks to Angelina's beef lasagna, she felt like a cat had crawled into her mouth and grabbed ahold of her tongue." "Being late was like her own personal plague." "It was a shabby office on the second floor of a rickety office building that looked like a motel with its outside stairs and doors lined up next to each other like motel rooms." just yuck. "His eyes were dark, black even, and his mouth looked like it didn't know what a smile was. " "Everyone else was deserting Zach like rats off a drowning ship, but not Katie." cliche again. "It was like hugging a very slender, well dressed twig." "It was like it had a giant blinking red bulls eye on it that said "Target acquired. The scarf is inside the bag." "You looked like you were biting a giant lemon when you told her to have a nice time shopping." "She spends like she's trying to stock up for the second coming." whew... and that's only in the first half of my novel! Thu, 01 Dec 2011 09:01:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_915589 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_915589 Lady_Indis_Dress Some of these are good. The well-dressed twig is nice. The white on rice one...like fur on a polar bear? Like rain on Seattle? Like foam on a pint of Guiness? Like snow on the north pole? Like mold on a month-old cheeseburger? Thu, 01 Dec 2011 11:59:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_916890 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_916890 Lady_Indis_Dress Last night I wrote: "James felt as useful as a blind sight hound." Thu, 01 Dec 2011 12:00:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_916897 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_916897 Tetrinity I have a few odd ones here and there, but these two are probably my most... interesting. I'm fairly sure they were both written in the middle of the night, which would explain a lot. "Against the mostly poor quality cars and murky skyscrapers surrounding us we stood out like an elephant at a funeral." While I don't doubt the validity of the simile... what the hell was running through my mind here? "This girl was to conversation like an 18 oz sirloin steak was to a vegan's birthday party." This was the first thing to come to mind in an attempt to describe an awkward situation. Yeah, I dunno. To put them in context, these are in a mostly serious cyberpunk novel. I say "mostly" because later in the novel I introduced an extremely sarcastic character who makes me laugh every time I read any section including him. Both of the similies above were before this character's introduction, though, so I really have no excuse. All that being said, I'll probably end up keeping both of them. Fri, 02 Dec 2011 05:01:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_921965 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_921965 Tetrinity I like "being late was like her own personal plague" a lot, though I'd probably have removed the "like" and made it a metaphor. My first idea for a replacement to "white on rice" was "strawberry sauce on ice cream", closely followed by "syrup on pancakes". I should probably quit trying to come up with similies and get lunch. Fri, 02 Dec 2011 05:06:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_921979 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_921979 PenGryphon2007 I LOVE this one, and picturing it made me laugh. xD Fri, 02 Dec 2011 11:29:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_923495 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_923495 DanielleM Thanks! I looove all your ideas. I especially like rain on Seattle! Fri, 02 Dec 2011 15:04:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_924505 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_924505 Labyrinth Rose "His voice grating my ears like a... Cheese grater..." Fri, 02 Dec 2011 15:19:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_924571 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_924571 Lady_Indis_Dress A cheese grater being used on one's ears would really hurt! So in a way, that's actually clever. Fri, 02 Dec 2011 17:10:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_925051 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_925051 Stratadrake Back in the Nanoisms thread, Annafiassa <a href="http://nanowrimo.org/en/forum_comments/661235" rel="nofollow">posted</a> possibly the only simile that can rival Douglas Adams: [quote]Silently, stealthily, the giant spider descended from the treetops like a falling rock. [/quote] Fri, 02 Dec 2011 21:17:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_926433 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_926433 Stratadrake Wow, that one is wrong (and thus funny) on so many levels.... Fri, 02 Dec 2011 21:22:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_926456 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_926456 Geesafaire I don't knnow if this is genious or stupd (or even if it's technically a metaphor), but this is what happens when I go more than 20 words without dialogue. The Menagerie was a wondrous place, more massive than any zoo in the world, where animals from different time periods frolicked together in a way not often seen outside cheap, plastic dinosaurs from the ninety-nine cent store. Frankly, it had always bothered Kat that the toy designers would haphazardly put mammoths, triceratops, and stegosauruses in one playset, with no thought to the scientific inaccuracies. But here in the Menagerie, a wooly rhinoceros family gladly shared a their spacious paddock with a herd of quaggas, and Kat had to wonder if maybe the toy designers weren't on to something. Sat, 03 Dec 2011 06:09:46 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_927344 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_927344 Tetrinity Oh my... I love this so much. It works great! Sun, 04 Dec 2011 06:17:52 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_931494 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_931494 Laura E. Andrews Very hilarious :D Sun, 04 Dec 2011 08:29:52 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_931755 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_931755 Laura E. Andrews [quote/]Gaelrin felt as though he were being kept on the edge of a cliff of suspense."[quote] Sun, 04 Dec 2011 08:52:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_931814 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_931814 Laura E. Andrews Oh, edit button, where art thou? Sun, 04 Dec 2011 08:52:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_931816 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_931816 Geesafaire Yay! Sun, 04 Dec 2011 11:05:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_932235 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_932235 DatKatzuu YOUR ICON IS AWESOME. Yay for Takarazuka! &lt;3 Mon, 05 Dec 2011 09:34:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_936907 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_936907 AnnieDayNow She gave Sheppard a look that turned his insides to frozen pudding. frozen... pudding? Really? Mon, 19 Dec 2011 19:18:24 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_986381 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_986381 Lady_Indis_Dress That one's good. Tue, 20 Dec 2011 13:28:01 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_988328 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_988328 Lady_Indis_Dress Now I'm thinking of freezing pudding to see what it looks like. LOL Tue, 20 Dec 2011 13:28:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_988331 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_988331 Raquelin [quote=Spam286] Yesterday I got so stuck looking for a simile that eventually I ended up with this just so I could get on with it. "The sun had just risen above the eastern wall of the city, peeking between two of its grand towers like a fucking simile." That probably won't make the cut when it comes time to edit. [/quote] Do. Not. Cut. That. Thu, 22 Dec 2011 11:20:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_993959 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_993959 Raquelin [quote=Anba] I love this thread. [quote]He stared at the glass as if I'd handed him a dead toddler.[/quote] Wait. WHAT? (Yeah, I really wrote that. I just can't believe it myself ...) [quote]»You're kinda cute. Not that way cute, more like a sad, clumsy, little puppy which is looking for its mommy and doesn't know she's already dead.«[/quote] Yeah, thanks for the compliment. NaNo seems to bring out my creepy side. [/quote] I love these. Keep them. I love tragic-puppy comparisons! Thu, 22 Dec 2011 11:30:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_993983 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_993983 Raquelin [quote=buhbyebirdie] I don't know exactly what the hell I'm going for here but I find it pleasantly baroque and plan to use it to make sure my beta readers are still paying attention: He couldn't shake the feeling that something beautiful and precious was being eroded away with every second she was in her debutante costume. Her natural state, he suspected, was deep in the ocean luring sailors to their deaths among the reefs and collecting pirate treasure. He wondered if Will would ever appreciate this amazing thing he had a hand in killing. <em>Did the Visigoths ever appreciate the majesty of Rome?</em> Yes, that's right, I just compared an unfortunate engagement to the sack of Rome in 410. You're welcome, posterity. [/quote] And I can only applaud. Thu, 22 Dec 2011 11:33:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_993989 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_993989 ObiKimono [quote]The wind stirred them a little, and they wavered like dead fruits in the darkness. [/quote] Talking about LANTERNS. Where this came from I have no idea whatsoever. [quote]The building loomed over the empty street like a whale over a paper cutout.[/quote] ...me and similes are like dog poop and Christmas lights. Thu, 22 Dec 2011 14:45:01 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994379 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994379 Meli's Abstract Tree Theory Lol, I've done that before. It's sort of like those fudge popsicles. Thu, 22 Dec 2011 15:21:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994502 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994502 Lady_Indis_Dress The dead fruits cracked me up. Puzzled by the whale though. Thu, 22 Dec 2011 17:18:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994863 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_994863 ObiKimono You're not as confused as I am. But when I wrote it, it was past two a.m., and I was beyond caring. I had this thing for a while where I tried to come up with original comparisons and I guess I took it a little too far.... Fri, 23 Dec 2011 03:21:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_995866 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_995866 Ink_Stained_Midnight "Tobias triumphantly crawled out of the crevice like Boba Fett rising from the Sarlacc pit in that scene of Return of the Jedi that George Lucas never added in, because much like Tobias, Boba obviously escaped." I don't even know anymore... Fri, 23 Dec 2011 17:23:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_996962 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_996962 FreakierThanThou Haha, loving the Star Wars tangent. [quote] The entire planet was shrouded in a deep fog as thick as blindness. [/quote] What. Wed, 28 Dec 2011 15:44:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007306 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007306 Lady_Indis_Dress That's good too! Wed, 28 Dec 2011 16:08:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007362 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007362 Lady_Indis_Dress Never thought of blindness as having a thickness. That might actually be brilliant. Wed, 28 Dec 2011 16:09:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007364 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1007364 Angryman I think Robot Chicken had that take on Boba Fett. Wed, 28 Dec 2011 23:20:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1008400 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1008400 Geesafaire Now, keep in mind that while it may be related to pudgy little wombats and fuzzy-wuzzy koalas, the marsupial lion was an immense carnivore. It was, more or less, a killing machine that carried around smaller killing machines inside it. A matryoshka of death. Sun, 15 Jan 2012 14:30:52 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1062655 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1062655 Steampunk avi8or Matroshka of death. That's amazing. Marsupial lion? I won't even ask. I wrote this little gem. [quote] Her eyes were glassy like glass. [/quote] Sun, 15 Jan 2012 17:43:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1063138 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1063138 Geesafaire That's a nice one. Marsupial lions actually existed, and they were awesome: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thylacoleo Mon, 16 Jan 2012 12:53:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1064995 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1064995 Steampunk avi8or That's so cool! The name and the image remind me of the thylacine, which is also extinct. :( Mon, 16 Jan 2012 18:01:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1066113 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1066113 Earthsick I'm actually pretty envious since my English writing skills are not good enough yet to come up with things like ... most of the stuff in this thread. xD Gwah. I need to write/read more! Fri, 20 Jan 2012 02:47:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1075975 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1075975 LEwolfwriter Your icon is genius. <em>Evil</em> genius. Fri, 20 Jan 2012 13:38:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1077070 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1077070 MissAngelAdorer Here's one: "She shrugged one shoulder, her round lips closing and opening like those of a fish." This wouldn't be so bad if it hadn't come out of nowhere since the character isn't usally described like that. I'd post more but I haven't used that many metaphors in this novel, which is probably a good thing. Sat, 21 Jan 2012 12:58:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1079329 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1079329 MissAngelAdorer Oh wait, here's another one: "Sometimes, there was even a rash involved. With the creamy color of my skin and the red blotches I would look like a badly drawn human-shaped checkerboard." Just like the narrator, Eloise, I worry for my sanity. Sat, 21 Jan 2012 13:57:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1079454 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1079454 .Aurelia. [quote]His eyes were dull and glazed over, like a doughnut.[/quote] Um, excuse me, like a what now? The character is about to kill himself, and I'm comparing his eyes to.... doughnuts. Wed, 01 Feb 2012 18:52:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1108653 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1108653 Kitiwriter this is one strange thing I can't even at the moment. But it's not getting cut. "You're as nosy as an aardvark, I gotta tell you." Thu, 02 Feb 2012 20:36:32 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1111565 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1111565 Kitiwriter [quote=.Aurelia.] [quote]His eyes were dull and glazed over, like a doughnut.[/quote] Um, excuse me, like a what now? The character is about to kill himself, and I'm comparing his eyes to.... doughnuts. [/quote] Well, doughnuts are tasty... Thu, 02 Feb 2012 20:38:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1111569 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1111569 ElliMelody [quote]For the first time, his eyes turn towards me. They dart up and down like flying lettuce.[/quote] Yeh... anyone got a good simile/metaphor for fast-moving green eyes? I've tried geckos, lizards, praying mantises, and flying lettuce, but none seem to work... Sun, 05 Feb 2012 17:33:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1118495 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1118495 Hannah17 Here's one of mine. "The waves broke upon the shore like magic breaking upon the brow of a tiny baby unicorn infant that had rainbow sparkles in its beard." I don't even know what happened there. Sun, 05 Feb 2012 20:27:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1118951 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1118951 VeganMacAndCheese [quote=H] This isn't from my NaNo, but my friend has a tendency to write that things "Come out like new born babies." I'm afraid it'll show up in my novel... [/quote] o.o I ALWAYS say "I'm gonna make like a baby and head out" :'P Mon, 06 Feb 2012 10:49:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_1119947 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=4#forum_thread_comment_1119947 firelight_cinderbrick [quote] Dylan stood up. It felt like he hadn't stood up in a long time. It was as if he was lying on that beach from the day time began. [/quote] Screw it, I'm just going to go ahead and fetch my shotgun and shoot it now. Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:15:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1126060 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1126060 lionhuntermo I have a character named Dylan in a post-apocalypse story, who always carries around a shot gun. The group of survivors are in LA, and are constantly at the beach. Uh...?? Fri, 10 Feb 2012 16:44:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1129734 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1129734 Geesafaire I've got two from my short story about a time traveling Hercules… [quote]After his little tryst with Pasiphaë, the Cretan bull went all deadbeat dad and refuse to get a job and support Pasiphaë and the Minotaur, opting instead to smash walls and generally terrorize Crete.[/quote] Yes, because the Cretan bull was really a deadbeat dad… [quote]Taking a page from Hercules, I, ah… "wowed her with my impressive ability" in exchange for the Spanx. If you know what I mean. And I don't mean I bested her in a game of Pictionary.[/quote] This is from the modern Girdle of Hippolyta labor. Overlooking the fact that I've corrupted the magical girdle into Spanx, when did Herc become so… pervy? Sat, 11 Feb 2012 08:47:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1131387 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1131387 Rubyfruit [quote]She plodded up the long stairway, her arms hanging as limply as a cafeteria lettuce leaf off of a plastic fork.[/quote] I don't even know anymore. Sat, 11 Feb 2012 09:36:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1131478 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1131478 Yirggzmb Want to know something scary? I knew what game you were talking about before you ever mentioned Neopets. *highfive* Sat, 11 Feb 2012 12:50:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_1131720 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=6#forum_thread_comment_1131720 firelight_cinderbrick Whoa. Coincidence or what? Well my character is a minor won't really be on that beach for more than two chapters and it's a fantasy book, so it's pretty far off. Sun, 12 Feb 2012 04:28:49 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1133494 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1133494 Lady_Indis_Dress This probably sucks, but how about emerald elevators? Or maybe you could try a green bird (there have to be some green birds in the world) The flying lettuce cracked me up. Wed, 15 Feb 2012 10:12:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141690 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141690 Lady_Indis_Dress Those deadbeat dads can be so bull-headed about their responisbilities. LOL So Herc's been taking lessons from guys at modern bars I guess. I like the Pictionary bit though. Wed, 15 Feb 2012 10:13:23 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141691 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141691 Lady_Indis_Dress If you drop the fork part I think it's perfect. I've had those lettuce leaves. They are very limp. It's a great simile really. Wed, 15 Feb 2012 10:14:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141692 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1141692 Rubyfruit The person who is plodding up the stairway is in high school, where limp cafeteria lettuce leaves are common. At least, that was my experience, and I was in college. Thu, 16 Feb 2012 10:28:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1144233 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1144233 SilentWalrus "Overall, I improved with practice. If my throws were points on a scatterplot, the line of best fit would have had a positive slope." Or maybe I should just shoot my math textbook. Fri, 17 Feb 2012 11:38:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1147338 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1147338 Lady_Indis_Dress Oh! That sounds like way too much studying! LOL Fri, 17 Feb 2012 15:13:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1147812 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1147812 StaticMud "You should have stayed with them. They're all at home by now," The dictator told her, watching her across the table with his elbows on the table and his hands folded together, like a condescending hipster artist from France who wears all black and stands around judging everyone's art as being inferior to his own or like a therapist curiously studying his patient with more interest in studying the human psyche then actually helping them. Thu, 23 Feb 2012 10:22:31 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1164499 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1164499 ElliMelody [quote] Cali’s body felt warm just thinking about, although her turtleneck was still dampened with melted snow and clung to her skin like plastic wrap. [/quote] This is good in a horrible way.... Fri, 24 Feb 2012 13:50:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1167795 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1167795 lionhuntermo "And on his shoulder was a sort of Celtic Knot, a star inside a four-leaf clover shape, or maybe four interlocked tear drops." I was tired and rambling… Not exactly a metaphor, but... Sat, 25 Feb 2012 20:29:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1171133 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1171133 lionhuntermo Trying to come up with something creative. But I'm sick and over--tired. Still don't have anything. [quote]I turned my attention to my ham-on-wheat sandwich, my cheeks lighting up like nobody’s business. (Oh my God, really? No.) I turned my attention to my ham-on-wheat sandwich, my cheeks lighting up like firetrucks. (What? Firetrucks aren't florescent. Try again.) I turned my attention to my ham-on-wheat sandwich, my cheeks lighting up like Rudolph's nose whenever he told a lie. (What the...)[/quote] Tue, 28 Feb 2012 18:53:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1178023 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=7#forum_thread_comment_1178023 Black_roses I'm not sure if this is horrible or creative. [quote]The words were like grapefruit in my mouth, bitter and cold.[/quote] I think I'm going to go with horrible. Sun, 18 Mar 2012 10:21:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1220607 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1220607 writergirl31 This thread is hilarious. Thanks everyone for brightening up a bad day ;) Here are my lamest ones: His eyes look like a bar of chocolate that’s been left in the sun too long. "No, Scott. I'm not coming with you," I say, trying to sound all tough and bitter, but instead sounding like a high-pitched hamster running in his cage. (even worse, Scott is about to kidnap her, so it's a really serious, action packed scene. Awful) (and this is later, when he's strangling her and she's trying to push his hands off her neck). It's like a fly trying to pull its fragile wing out from under a huge stone bolder. My heart feels heavy, like a giant has pressed his knee into my chest and is crushing my body with his weight. The silence is awkward, hanging above like dark clouds that threaten rain. You expect the sky to start gushing with water, but the clouds just get darker and darker until you wish the storm would just start already. (I have no idea what I was trying to say here. I should had just said, the silence was awkward) I hear the smile in his voice, because his words sound like they've been laying out in the sun all day. (all I can picture are sunburnt words. Not what I was going for) He looks like he swallowed a fly. (OK, I kinda like that one, for some reason. Also, I compare a lot of things to flies...) I'm glad I found this thread. It's nice to know I'm not the only who writes weird sentences :) Mon, 19 Mar 2012 12:29:38 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1224024 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1224024 Geesafaire I just wrote this conversation... -_- "That's Mrs. O'Leary's cow!" she cried out in delight, clapping her hands in glee like a four-year-old who'd just been told she may have ice cream for breakfast. Jack looked at her in the disapproving way a mother would look at a father who had just told their four-year-old she could have ice cream for breakfast. "Keep it down, will you?" Sun, 25 Mar 2012 09:14:43 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1237430 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1237430 writergirl31 I just laughed. That is awesome :p Sun, 25 Mar 2012 11:23:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1237602 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1237602 Lady_Indis_Dress "The silence is awkward, hanging above like dark clouds that threaten rain." That on its own is actually really good. Fri, 30 Mar 2012 19:15:06 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1249865 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1249865 Geesafaire Even Jack, who had been trained to not get drawn into the lives of people from foreign times, found his hard shell dissolving like a Cadbury Mini-Egg in the pocket of a hyperactive toddler. My only excuse is it was Easter... Mon, 09 Apr 2012 08:44:11 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1275511 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1275511 ElliMelody "Like a sea monster that had woken from its deep sleep, ready to burn down a village." ...sea monsters don't usually burn villages...Nice try though, Rori. Wed, 11 Apr 2012 18:01:08 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1282103 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1282103 SweetJuly I LOVE THIS. &lt;3 Wed, 25 Apr 2012 15:27:46 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1319857 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1319857 Tearless Sadly, I've deleted it since November, but I remember I once compared my character's appearance (he's extremely pale, has bright red-dyed hair, and was at the time covered in blood) to a Canadian flag. For some reason it was the first red and white thing that came to mind, despite my not being Canadian, and I must have needed momentum too much to think of a better one. Thu, 03 May 2012 19:34:57 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1340991 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1340991 Becca Jayne Aterum stepped forward and all around them the dead fled while the darkness danced around his form him eager puppies. Because puppies and the soul sucking darkness that surrounds the god of death totally go together. *facepalm* Sat, 05 May 2012 04:02:56 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1344315 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1344315 Becca Jayne on the very next page after Aterum has resurrected my MC; he slept like the dead Sat, 05 May 2012 04:20:11 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1344338 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1344338 thejustkat [quote]She was generally considered a chatterbox, and now her mind was as empty of words as a Mensa convention is of humility. [/quote] ...Actually I kinda like it. It stays. =P Tue, 08 May 2012 16:35:25 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1353817 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1353817 ElliMelody [quote] I found my own eyes watching the performance his eyes were putting on. [/quote] As she is describing this, she is falling in love with the character whose eyes were apparently putting on a show. And all I can imagine is a pair of eyes doing the Charleston.... [quote]His eyes were hard like emeralds. [/quote] Not sure if genius or ridiculous.....Its describing a look this guy was giving her that was basically yelling at her without words. (Like that look your mom gives you when you say a little too loudly that she used to hit you when you were a child. Wait, what?) Oh, and this is the same guy with the performing eyeballs. [quote] Chive's head snapped toward me so quickly, I expected it would roll right off from the force.[/quote] Ow. [quote]Every touch felt like the first; unexpected and warm, yet cold like setting shocked by a lightning bolt.[/quote] Is that cold? And how can it be both cold and hot? (Granted, every time someone touches the character, she feels sparks through her body because it activates a power she has.) Oh yeah, the one touching her? Performing eyeball guy..... (Earlier/later. Yeah, its earlier chronologically, but I wrote it later.) [quote]She asked after a while, setting her brush down in frustration as her hair began to rise up in all directions as if [/quote] I caught myself here. Why? As you can probably guess, I was once again about to write "as if she were shocked by lightning." Because that went so well last time. Tue, 08 May 2012 20:08:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1354378 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1354378 Kenouni Renashin This. I love this. Win. Mon, 21 May 2012 06:39:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1386666 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1386666 thejustkat These two I came up with in conversation. I don't know whether to be proud or alarmed.... Postage Meters are like pandas, you can only rent them. At a different time I said that tribbles were like Pringles, in that you can't have just one. ;D Mon, 21 May 2012 17:51:25 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1388329 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/nanowrimo-ate-my-soul/threads/26945?page=8#forum_thread_comment_1388329