Self-doubt, and writing fictional worlds and emotional development

So recently I've been getting the idea that some of my novel ideas are not for me; I'm not fit to write them (sounds like I feel like delegating the work; this thread is not about that, no).

First I tried writing a parallel world fantasy-reality comedy. It felt increasingly like my worlds were flat, drab and incomplete. So, after some three or four months I dropped it, had a break and moved on to a different thing.

This time it was - actually still kind of is - another parallel reality thing. It starts in our universe with a very violent event. The protagonist, who is a teenager, observes this violent event... and then the plot goes on; with many other strange and upsetting events for this teenager. So I got stuck, I think, not being able, or being tired of trying to get into his head. Right now I've almost no idea how he would feel after all this stuff has happened to him.

So I'm just starting to think I'm bad writer material - it seems I'm bad with constructing virtual worlds, with human psychology - and these things seem pretty important for a writer. I'd even go as far as to say that most successful writers I know off start with them as their fortes, and only have to work on language... er... other things.

I won't deny any opinions that it might be completely unrelated depression (in fact, I was diagnosed with it this year). Or that everybody works at these skills and that I have to, too. Or that I just need to step away for a bit (although I haven't actually touched the novel for a couple of weeks now). Or that my problems are very complex and it's natural that they should take long to work out (but it's depressing to not write anything meanwhile).

But I can't help thinking that I may not be cut out for writing. I guess I'm not asking for reassurances, but for realistic honest answers. Preferably with historic precedent. Like, a great writer started out with flat worlds lacking detail and equally flat characters and how long it took him to get to vivacity.

Also, suggestions as to what I should do as I'm obviously in no shape to continue on this novel. Writing prompts? Although I fail to see how they would help me with complex worlds and long-term emotional development of characters.

I guess for all I've just written, I can't say I'm ready to give up on writing. It's like an integral part of my life, even though I sometimes ignore it for pretty long periods of time. It's like a mode of thinking about myself - "I'm a writer". I mean it gives meaning to my life...

Well, that last bit might be redundant. Enough has been said about it... well, historically. I guess I felt like a lyrical digression.

Well, first of all, I don't think you need a complete fantasy world to write a story. So what if the world that your characters live in is a drab place, covered in mud and fog, smelling of swamp waters and damp, rotting plants? It's their world and you must tell the story like that. What does your character hear? Smell? Does he/she get stung by bees and mosquitoes, bitten by fleas, shivered from when snow melted and trickled down his/her jacket?

Try changing the point of view for your characters. If your main character is in a first person, why not try rewriting it so that it is in a third person?

Most importantly, don't give up on writing. How long have you been writing? As for historic precedent, why don't you look back on one of your first pieces of writing and compare it to the last thing you've written? Congratulate yourself. You've improved from that time.

I consider myself to be self-apprenticing for writership for over 10 years. I'm afraid I destroyed my first pieces.

The fantasy world is not drab in literal sense. In fact, the fantasy world, in that sense in which I consider it drab, is a bit livelier than the reality. The real universe is less coherent with what I consider reality. You know, unintentionally. I'm afraid my characters don't get bitten by mosquitoes. I guess I kind of forgot that they existed (one of my major problems).

My character is in third person, but I want to have a consistent viewpoint, so I guess my mode is called third-person subjective.

Also, after a night of thought I came to an idea:

So, if writing is a learning process, and here attempted on my own, it is possible that I took on a challenge that is beyond my level. In this case it would seem reasonable that I should try to go back to a challenge of appropriate level. By that I mean restarting on a different story.

My argument against this is that accomplished writers don't seem to find writing easier from story to story. It could be that they continuously increase their challenge, although it doesn't seem like it.

This might not relate to your post at all, BUT I'm in more or less the same position. Writing is just one of those things I have been doing on again off again throughout my life, except that when I was in fifth grade I didn't worry about things like plot point, character development etc. etc. It's only now, when I worry about those things, that I start doubting that I'm cut out for this at all. Which is a pointless thought because I'll keep trying and I'll keep doing Nano and Screnzy either way.

Sometimes I wonder if all the big writers started out with things like character sheets. Did Arthur Conan Doyle pretend-interview Sherlock Holmes and asked him what his favourite fruit was or for his shoe size? Maybe. I don't know. There might not even be a way of knowing, but I just can't picture it.

But I digress. I can't give you any advice. Obsession works for me, personally. Getting so obsessed with something I want to do something similar.

Moving to NaNoWriMo Ate My Soul (it's not off topic if it's about writing!)