Talents Too Cool For Most Other People
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Copyright © 2012 The Office of Letters and Light :: All posted novel excerpts remain copyright their authors.
Talents Too Cool For Most Other People
Welcome to a thread where your amazing (If not a little strange) talents can be appreciated. Just feel free to share and ask questions about other people. Just don't put people down and make sure to share some of your own.
And feel free to come back and share more on other occasions!
So I'll start:
I can purr. As in, like a cat
I'm excellent at hiding in suitcases
I can hit a high F#
I can touch my tongue to my nose
I can sing the alphabet backwards
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I can also sing the alphabet backwards! I can also say or write sdrawkcab without much trouble.
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I hide in suitcases too!!! lol one of the requirements of any new case I get is that I must be able to fit inside it, so I can hide and jump out at people XD
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I can sing with an accent, but I can't talk with one.
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That's awesome! Which accents? I can't sing with one and when I talk, my British accent usually ends up somewhere between there and Australia.
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I tend to lean towards Irish. I mostly mimic the artist I'm listening to, but I find myself listening to a lot of Irish songs and bands. Celtic Thunder, Gaelic Storm, The Irish Descendants... yeah, I should have listened to these groups more often when I was in high school choir.
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Oh, and being a naturally tenor, I can sing in a slightly higher octave, or a much deeper one.
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I can mimic cat and sheep noises; with the sheep, I can also make the necessary octave adjustment so that I can convince a ewe that it is her lamb making the noise. Which is a little cruel, I'll warrant.
All the joints in my fingers can bend backwards as well as forwards.
I can sing the Blackadder theme tune from season 1, and know what the Knights who until recently said Ni actually say.
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I quote The Book of Armaments, Chapter 2, Verses 9 to 21. And silly walk.
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I know what they say too--the Spamalot version, at least. What's the original?
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I apologize for any typos, and if I have the saint's name wrong. Here it goes:
"And Saint Etalot raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'O, Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, for with it thou mayst blow thy enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats, and li-"
"Skip a bit, brother."
"And the Lord spake, saying, 'First, shalt thou take out the holy pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out! Once the number three, being the third number be reached, then lobeth thou thy holy hand grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being not in My sight, shalt snuff it.'"
Amen.
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Always thought it was Saint Attila and thy foe who being naughty in my sight etc. Myself I love this quote and my secret desire is to read it in church instead of the normal lectionary reading!
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A friend of mine asked my if I was a packet of Taco Bell hot sauce, what my packet would say. I told him I'd have that whole quote on my packet.
Yes, this should be read in church. And Bishop On The Landing should be reenacted in church. As far as songs go, go nuts and go with Ina-Gadda-Da-Vida.
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I can make incredibly good monkey noises.
I can twist my feet around so they're heel-to-toe (it's kind of hard to explain but it makes people yelp).
I can eat ridiculous quantities of chilli.
I'm 30 and look 15. I think it might actually be a superpower...
I can print pictures off my computer onto ANYTHING: clothes, metal, foil, ribbon, surgical tape, leather, plastic....
I have been told by a specialist doctor that I have possibly the world's fastest digestive tract! Yep, super guts.
There's a million more. Sometimes I wish I could have just ONE talent that's actually useful. Oh well...
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I have perfect pitch. I can do a realistic Gollum impersonation. I too can say the alphabet backwards. I can recite the names of all the books of the Bible in order. Hm...
I might be back with more. ;)
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No, I can't do a perfect Gollum. That said, I can do a perfect Gollum on steroids.
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I can watch a cartoon, and know who voiced the characters.
I can listen to 1-2 seconds of a song and know which one it is.
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I still know how to read (and fold) a paper map.
I can keep a Fiddlestick going for at least 2 minutes. (If you don't know what a Fiddlestick is I guess you are just not cool enough!)
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High five for the map thing! My mom has started getting directions off MapQuest for all our trips, but until recently we used paper maps for road trips, and she still shows me some routes on paper maps, so as the navigator I have plenty of practice reading and folding them. :)
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I can read paper maps and navigate with a compass!
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I have a prenatural talent for finding the worse possible liqure.
Not counting swim trunks, costumes and bathrobes, I haven't worn any sort of bottom half covering but cargo pants for 14 years.
I can type faster with my left or right hand only than the average person can type with both.
I can return cans faster than anyone I know, and have mastered the kata of using a aluminum/plastic and glass bottle return machine simultaneously.
And the thing closest to a superpower: I can navigate through support line's IVR and first level of tech support faster than anyone else I know.
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Oh, here's another one. I can construct sentences in the second person informal. And I can do it properly.
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I have what I call a "flexibility magic trick": I can link my hands behind my back (one elbow up, one down) and then twist my arms so that my hands are clasped in front of me, without ever losing contact between my hands.
I can continue typing while someone is talking to me without losing track of either (can't talk while typing without getting messed up, though).
I believe Romeo and Juliet is a black comedy, not a tragedy, and successfully got my Shakespeare class to debate this for half an hour. Does that count?
I have an awesome memory, so good that at least one person in my graduating class (of around 40 people, for reference) thought I actually had a photographic memory--without me even trying to give this impression.
I can and usually do use my silverware the European way. (Too cool for most Americans, at least.)
I intuitively understand English grammar. I hate it, but I understand it.
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I can read a paper map and fold it, and know how to acolyte in a Lutheran church service which has Communion and a spur-of-the-moment baptism. (It was in two languages--Arabic and English and I had no idea what I was doing most of the time.), how to sing the Psalms, clap during classical concerts, read classic Latin (not Middle Ages Latin because its grammar is bonkers) and almost always understand it, to teach myself almost anything using only library books, paper, and either a pen or a pencil. (Homeschooled.) and how to strip and burn palm branches for ashes to use on Ash Wednesday (today). :P
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I knit, I make my own yarn. Yup, I have a wheel, like in Rumpelstiltskin.
I juggle scarves, balls, rings, and clubs, and am learning contact juggling like in the labyrinth. I'm also learning ping pong juggling.
There's other things I do, but I have to go be a paramedic student now.
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I can, with my right hand, write forwards, mirrored and upside down. With both hands at the same time I can write forward with one and backwards with the other. I like taking notes this way in public because people STARE...
:P
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I am not ambidextrous enough to even attempt writing backwards with my left hand. That said, I can read mirrored, sideways, upside down, or any angle you want to put the writing at with only a slight delay compared to reading right-side up. I can also read Spanish out loud at a natural pace with minimal mistakes (though I probably won't understand it at that pace) and can speak Spanish well enough to leave messages for my mom in it and speak it with one of the counselors I've seen.
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I can read from all angles and in mirrors too! And I can read Spanish and Italian fairly well, even if I have NO idea what I'm saying, because I studied linguistics and they're phonetic languages. Once you know the pronunciations, you know how any worrd is spelled or pronounced. My Italian teacher used to tell people to stop asking how to spell things: It's spelt exactly how it sounds! And is pronounced exactly as it's written! Not like english with its knives and hiccoughs and throughs and other oddities.
:)
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For some words in Spanish you do have to ask how it's spelled, because "h" is silent and there are multiple letters that will make the "s" sound in any given situation. And fortunately, in the US we spell it hiccups. Isn't that much neater?
Also: The tough coughs as he ploughs through the dough. That's a pretty good demonstration of how ridiculous English is.
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Yeah, but there's rules that govern them!
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Sorry! I'm not arguing.. Just realised that I sound argumentative. I just have flu today so my brain is all... Meh. Anyway, you probably know more about it than me. In Italian, there's various pronunciations of certain letters but they're strictly governed so you can't ever really get it wrong once you know the rule! :)
As for English, I read this a long time ago:
I take it you already know,
Of tough and bough and cough and dough.
Others may stumble, but not you,
On hiccough, thorough, laugh and through.
Well done! And now you wish, perhaps,
To learn of less familiar traps. Beware of heard, a dreadful word,
That looks like beard and sounds like bird.
And dead - it’s said like bed, not bead,
For goodness’ sake, don’t call it ‘deed’!
Watch out for meat and great and threat,
(They rhyme with suite and straight and debt). A moth is not a moth in mother,
Nor both in bother, broth in brother.
And here is not a match for there,
Nor dear and fear for bear and pear.
And then there’s dose and rose and lose –
Just look them up – and goose and choose.
And cork and work and card and ward,
And font and front and word and sword. And do and go and thwart and cart –
Come, come, I’ve hardly made a start! A dreadful language? Why man alive!
I’d mastered it when I was five.
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Oh, yeah, forgot about those things in Spanish. And if I remember correctly, the letter G can make both the G sound and the H sound. Then again, it's been so long since I took Spanish, and I only did so well.
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Yay for phonetic languages! I will say, though, that Spanish and Italian words are NOT always spelled how they sound. Ll in Spanish for some reason makes a Y sound, and Ci in Italian is a Ch sound.
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The mirrored writing! I thought no one else did this! This totally made my day!
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I have observed some talents that either aren't very cool or are too cool for me to try and learn. Just today I saw a champion snot flicker - perfect shooting from 10 feet away from the wastebasket. Made me forget what I was there to see him about and return to my own cubicle. Then there was the champion desk drummer - enters some data into the PC and does a finger press roll while waiting for the screen to come back. Sometimes it sounds like Wipeout, but most of the time it doesn't. Finally there is the guy with 3 keyboards and several screens. But that might not be a talent since there is no evidence he ever does anything useful.
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I know all the words to all the Starkid productions after only watching them twice (except MAMD, I'm on Act 2, watching it for he first time)
I'm kind of a primate freak, and know all sorts of random facts about them
I can sing with a British accent too!
I can play the viola, which I guess isn't too weird, but not many people even know what a viola is
I can also quote the Big Bang Theory, especially the episodes that are on all the time on TBS
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I can also do the splits while standing up
I get the hiccups at least twice a day. Sometimes it's more of a curse though.
I can pick things up with my toes.
I can play piano behind my back.
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Hey, someone else who has flexible toes!
It just occurred to me that I've been speaking in quotes a lot recently.
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Adding to the list of people who can pick things up with their toes. :D
And I THINK in quotes and modified quotes a lot, complete with the voices of the characters who said them.
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Personally, I think it's strange that some people CAN'T pick things up with their toes. It's just like picking things up with your fingers (sans thumbs), only it's your feet, not your hands.
"You just got sarge'd!" -Sarge, Red vs. Blue
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I can pick things up with my toes! I can also spread my toes apart really far. It creeps people out. LOL
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I can wiggle my pinky toe without moving any others!
Can you do that?
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Now THAT is talent.
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I can't. However, I can cross my pinky toe over the toe next to it, and cross my big toe over or under my longest toe.
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Ooo! Yay! I found other people who have movable toes! My cousin thinks I'm crazy 'cause everytime I see him I pinch his leg with my toes. For some reason he finds that odd... *shrugs* :D
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First, some background information:
In the grade school I went to, they had "puzzle maps": a bunch of wooden puzzle pieces in the shapes of countries that may or may not exist any more (ahem, Yugoslavia) that you had to put together in the shape of the continents.
Anyway, if I close my eyes and someone hands me one of those puzzle pieces, I can feel its edges and tell them what country it is with 100% accuracy. I can do the same thing with US states. Even Wyoming and Colorado, because the puzzle pieces had little pegs where the capital was located, so I could identify them based on whether it was Denver in the center or Cheyenne in the corner.
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I feel a little dumb now, I don't really have actual talents...^^
I just can pick stuff up with my toes (and will do so because I'm to lazy to bend over). And wiggle my ears, which amuses people. And bend my left arm (broken when I was a child) to a weird angle, which freaks people out. I have fun with both^^
And apparently (or so I'm told), I have mad language skills. I know grammar most people have never even heard of, I know words they would happily erase from the dictionary, and in language classes at school I usually got bored after a few lessons because I was tired of repeating everything for the umpteenth time when some people still didn't get it. Then I would start reading the textbook, and when I was finished with that, I resorted to staring out of the window while the rest of the class talked about how to properly introduce yourself (shouldn't you know that after an hour or so?!)...
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I think one talent we all forgot was the ability to do Nanowrimo and retain sanity (Or most of it).
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Sanity?! What would we do with something as useless as that?!