Your amazing quotes http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798 MoonPuppy1316 Here is a thread for amazing quotes from your novel. They can be inspirational, funny, or just whatever. They can be from things that come from the noveling process. Here are some of mine so far: "Now, being out of high school, Roland had a “successful” job that suited his ‘jump right in’ attitude. (Or at least that’s what the police chief said, it sounded a lot like crap to him.) " Me: "What are other fruits that can be eaten for breakfast besides Apples and Oranges?" A friend (whom I forgot was deathly allergic to fruit: "What, are you trying to kill me?!" Me: "No... I'm writing a novel." What are your awesome nuggets of wisdom? Tue, 01 Nov 2011 05:38:07 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_350089 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_350089 ObiKimono [quote]Even Kensington felt a little more awake as he watched, feeling the small prickles on his skin at the sound of it, breathing the smell of burning flesh, seeing the hideous look of the man being tortured. Or maybe it was the electricity travelling through the air that made the hairs on his arms stand up.[/quote] *cough* Does liking this make me a sadist? Tue, 01 Nov 2011 05:58:18 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_350511 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_350511 finchgeam Mine favorite so far.... I turned my chair around for a while without speaking. Why? Because I just love dramatic entrances. “With those words she had me, I was already interested in this case. The password is murder that’s what I always say … ” I thought to myself. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 07:04:38 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352105 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352105 Whitefairy24601 This is a great idea! One or two of mine: In her delight romantic tales of long ago, Faye followed the example of many heartbroken women and cut her hair short to display the hurt she was feeling. To her disdain however, the teacher quit and was replaced before he could ever see the honor bestowed to him. Aaaaand also: and what a difference there could be in adjectives for light skin. Faye’s was called porcelain, Laney’s pasty That's it for now!! Tue, 01 Nov 2011 07:20:09 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352450 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352450 flamento My favourite so far has to be the first line. "This is the tale of that secret, and how it effected the lives of eight men, one woman, a child, and a very nice piano." At once and the same time, it explains everything and nothing. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 07:28:12 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352663 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352663 Whitefairy24601 Wow. I kind of want to read this. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 07:35:28 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352844 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_352844 rachum_05 Me too! And it's slightly Douglas Adams-esque. I love his work! Tue, 01 Nov 2011 13:08:15 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_360739 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_360739 IFangirlLunaLovegood The second one is beautifully written! Good job! Tue, 01 Nov 2011 13:22:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_361320 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_361320 J_S_C “I want to hate you now more than ever,” I tell him. “Oh, I want to hate you. I don’t forgive you for what you did to me or the things that you said to me. I don’t even understand it, or why you did it. Even with all that, I don’t hate you even though I really want to.” --JSC Tue, 01 Nov 2011 13:24:04 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_361388 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_361388 MoonPuppy1316 Gavin couldn’t help but find it hilariously ironic that this man picked possibly the scrawniest guy in the room to claim was his black belt karate champion cousin. I'm beginning to love Gavin a little bit XD He's fun to pick on. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 14:00:28 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_362692 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_362692 Mistress_of_Magic Considering all the background noise, it was a miracle she managed to hear her cell phone ring. “Faye.” “Hey, Faye,” came a cheerful, raspy voice from the other end of the line. Megan rolled her eyes at the familiar greeting. “That was old the first time you said it years ago,” she informed him tartly. “It’s bypassed ancient and gone into fossilization by this point.” -She's at an airport, in case anybody was wondering. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 17:44:23 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_370683 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_370683 Blueocean Where the Great rulers of old once waged diplomatic battle against their weaker opponents, owls now hunted mice. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 17:59:08 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371226 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371226 crazygirl9310 [quote]Not commit suicide?” Chris offered helpfully. “Ngh.” Of course that’d be the only thing his parents approved of. [/quote] hehe, my favorite part of today's writing. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 18:05:03 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371441 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371441 s.m.keene Blueocean, that's really nice! Great parallel drawn. Lots of quick wit in this thread! Here's the paragraph that I'm most pleased with from my own writing so far: "They came to a room with navy carpet, plush leather armchairs, and a rich, mahogany mantle atop an ornate fireplace. This was the den. Along the mantle rested portraits of numerous historical figures in all fields. A young Niels Bohr stared sternly off into the aether while his companion, Abraham Lincoln, smiled cheekily in the same direction. The breast of John D. Rockefeller swelled proudly, while Franklin D. Roosevelt calmly reminded the room that even the most generous tycoon can't ensure a nation's welfare by himself. Gandhi, Charlemagne, Beethoven, Voltaire, and others all stood guard, plucked out of time and dropped in this den to inspire and challenge." Tue, 01 Nov 2011 18:15:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371772 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_371772 AlyRuth My favorite quote so far about my MC and his best friend: "The tribe always looked at the two as lovers, although they had only acted on it a handful of times. They saw themselves, first and foremost, as survival partners and, secondly, as lovers. " Second favorite from my MC's grandmother about our generation: "“They ate meat without a single thought toward the animal that gave its life for it,” Kiko's grandmother had told him, “They filled their stomachs with the lives of others and thanked only their own gold and silver for it, which their society worshiped like gods.”" Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:09:22 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_373690 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_373690 ETphonehome Paragraph. This particular couple's been married for thirty years, and they just barely escaped after they were caught committing a burglary. :) He sighed. “That was a close one.” She looked at him in disbelief. “Close? You’re jesting. That’s all you’ve got to say about that?” He soothed, “It’s just my shoulder, Kati. It’s not even my sword arm. I’ll be completely fine.” She swallowed to hide the tears that threatened to come – she wasn’t going to cry! She didn’t cry! She was the tough one! “It was just your shoulder this time! You know as well as I am that next time it’ll be your thick skull, or your foolish heart!” He reached out to her and took her hand – she allowed him to pull her close. “Oh, Little Green-Eyes, don’t call my heart foolish. It had the sense to pick you, didn’t it?” Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:13:58 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_373821 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_373821 Aerlinn Woah. I love this. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:24:54 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374186 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374186 PoetryByPoet It was as if I had never existed. And so was the truth. I had never existed and yet I existed. How cruel is the fate of those who oppose the Gods we do not believe in. not sure, might rewrite this one. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:27:29 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374265 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374265 PoetryByPoet Another one would be: . Yet then we had humans who loved others, loved beasts, plants and the Earth. Gaia, they called her. Unknowingly reaching out for a name long lost in this vile purgatory. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:31:27 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374390 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374390 ShonnaRose '“Ha! You really want to help those pathetic humans!” the demon exclaimed, his voice shaking the earth around them. “You are a much higher creature than that! Would you really lower yourself to help them!” “Of course,” the dragon replied, it’s voice as gentle as the rain around them. “Humans may be foolish and pathetic, but that is how they are supposed to be. Humans become greedy and allow hatred into their hearts, because they don’t know any better. All they can think about is how to do things easier and faster. We should pity them and help them whenever we can. It’s our duty as surperior beings to do so. That’s our purpose in this world.” “That’s a load of crap, and you know it,” the demon replied, it’s red eyes glowing bright. “Helping humans is useless, because they’ll never change. Once you save these, they will just go back to being the same greedy creatures they have always been! What a foolish waste of time! You are just like them! Soft and weak! What a pathetic creature you have become, my friend!” “Humans can change,” the dragon replied. “They have that ability to change their lives around in an instant. They also have something you will never have! A heart!” The dragon snarled, bearing its fangs at the demon. The time for talk was over, and it had done no good. This demon had himself snared into a deep hatred that he will never escape from. Not even death would save his soul now. His death, however, would save the lives of the humans, who were watching this exchange with eyes wide in wondermeant.' This is my favorite part of the story right here so far. It's a little rough right now, but it is just the first draft. It'll probably be a whole lot better when I go back to edit it. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:33:17 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374448 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374448 ijorissen "Some people are born awesome, and I'm obviously not one of them. So I'll just go sit in the corner over there, with my dunce cap on, and you can go cure cancer and solve world hunger. Come find me later, when you're not busy running a half marathon, and do me the favor of explaining your accomplishments in great detail, because even though I'm not your unemployed mother, I'd like to live vicariously through you, too. I want to call you an asshole, but that would make me a goddamn liar, because you're so fucking considerate. " Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:40:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374720 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374720 PoetryByPoet [quote=crazygirl9310] [quote]Not commit suicide?” Chris offered helpfully. “Ngh.” Of course that’d be the only thing his parents approved of. [/quote] hehe, my favorite part of today's writing. [/quote] Nice one! Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:48:05 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374939 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_374939 Ryan Lohner "The emperor’s palace dwarfs all around it, with a sparkling façade of white marble, and is the product of decades of labor. It was commissioned by Emperor Job I, who saw the building as the legacy he would leave behind as his family continued to rule forever. The result was horrific labors by uncountable slaves, and many deaths from disease and starvation as Job insisted on putting as much money as possible into the palace. The day it was completed, he proudly walked up the stairs and into the main front door to observe the fruits of others’ labor, where he was promptly killed by a loose ceiling tile. That night, the emperor’s family were all murdered as they slept, and their bodies displayed so many wounds from such a large array of implements that there was no way to tell what had actually killed them. No arrests were ever made, and the throne passed to a new family who had been waiting for just such an opportunity." This is just the second paragraph, by the way. If a story's going to be dark, you'd best get people prepared soon. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 19:52:29 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_375074 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_375074 SkidPuppet "At first I was shocked at her answer, given the long-sleeved, tea-length dress she was wearing, but then as I attempted to hold the door open that she had just held for me, I realized that she could probably kill me with her bare hands and use my corpse as a bench-press weight." Now that I'm actually writing the novel my MMC is getting way girlier and my FMC is getting way manlier than their descriptions in the outline. I'm kind of enjoying it. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 20:33:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_376559 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_376559 Rosebug [quote=ETphonehome] Paragraph. This particular couple's been married for thirty years, and they just barely escaped after they were caught committing a burglary. :) He sighed. “That was a close one.” She looked at him in disbelief. “Close? You’re jesting. That’s all you’ve got to say about that?” He soothed, “It’s just my shoulder, Kati. It’s not even my sword arm. I’ll be completely fine.” She swallowed to hide the tears that threatened to come – she wasn’t going to cry! She didn’t cry! She was the tough one! “It was just your shoulder this time! You know as well as I am that next time it’ll be your thick skull, or your foolish heart!” He reached out to her and took her hand – she allowed him to pull her close. “Oh, Little Green-Eyes, don’t call my heart foolish. It had the sense to pick you, didn’t it?” [/quote] Where's the 'like' button? Even if I don't count myself a romantic, I love that line. It's perfect, and seems to really crystallize their relationship, though I may just be reading into it too much. :) Tue, 01 Nov 2011 21:37:23 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_378773 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_378773 Kalyndie Just wrote this one and I am immensely proud of it, although that might be the late hour talking. "His eyes were a little too cold, and something about the hand that he extended to her put her in mind of machinery, as if by reaching out and taking hold of it, she could feel the wires underneath his skin, pulsing like veins." Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:12:36 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_379284 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_379284 edonil2 Two paragraphs for me...a character who's turned into one creepy lady. “What am I supposed to do with you, Colonel?” she asked absently, and he recognized her voice instantly. He could see blood dripping off her right hand, and shivered. What kind of person wasn’t bothered with blood covering their hand? She stepped over to him, and pulled up a chair with her gauntleted left hand. “Let’s try something different, shall we? I’ll ask questions about you, and you’ll answer them. No military intelligence, nothing that will betray anyone. Just a conversation. Much better than me continuing along in the vein of the past few days, isn’t it?” Her smile held genuine warmth that was present in her eyes, and he found himself more disturbed than if she’d been cold and harsh with him. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:22:22 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379551 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379551 Gambit508 ""Hello officer, how are you today? Protecting the city and stuff, good, you do that” Tobias glanced at the grim face of the man. “You seem…what’s the word, when you’re all frowny face” “Angry?” The man grumbled in question as Tobias shook his head, putting his finger to his face in confusion. “No, not angry. Less of a frowny face” “Upset?” “No…not upset, a longer word. Starts with an fff sound” Tobias accentuated the sound with odd hand gestures, causing the guard to back away a bit as Tobias leaned in. “Sir, I believe you mean frustrated.” The guard said as he glared at Tobias, who snapped with a look of sheer glee on his face. “Yes, frustrated, thank you my dear sir. You must have been a scholar before you joined this rubbish guard”" I have odd love for this bit of conversation Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:26:56 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379667 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379667 lieish by far my favorite! No matter how much duct tape you put on a window, the window still shakes in an earthquake. And she put a hell of a lot of duct tape on that window. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:34:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379838 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379838 lieish will someone please put a like button on these forums? i want to use it. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:35:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379853 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379853 minstrelwarlock I do that sometimes... I'm terrible at thinking of words (I know, right? I'm supposed to be a writer, so what the heck is going on?) although I get the feeling that with Tobias it's not so much an occasional quirk as a personality trait. Here's one of mine, which is cut from a longer piece of dialogue. "Why must you worry about why, when you are only ten years into being a what?" Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:36:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379862 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379862 BrendaGonet This is from my first chapter :D I LOVE this part. The beast rubbed against a tree intentionally creatting a rustling sound. When the girl’s head popped up and her feet became planted in the ground, he knew the game was on. The scent of her blood had already begun to change from the sweet scent of pleasentry, to the rich aroma of adrenaline. The rustling from the trees had Mckenzie on high alert. She stopped and searched the tree line as best as she could, but without any added light, she knew she had little chance of seeing a thing. Just walk quicker, it’s just an animal. It was an animal, just not any animal she had ever considered to possibly be in the middle of a park in Massachucetes. The beast watched as her steps quickened, and her eyes would shift from the tree line where he waited to the walk in front of her. He followed along, hidden in the darkness, making sure to continue to create just enough noise to let her know he was still there, but not enough for her to run...yet. It has to be an animal. It has to be an animal. Animals are not scary. It’s probably a racoon or something. Racoons are nocturnal, so are possums. That’s it, nothing to be frightened of. Just another few steps and I will be in the light, then another 5 minutes and I’m out of the park. Just a few more minutes. Mckenzie’s thoughts were wrought with worry and frantically trying to explain away the noise that seemed to be following her. She wanted to beleive anything except the truth, she was in danger. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:38:42 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379908 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379908 Sarcastic_R_Us "This couldn’t really be happening. It had to all be a bad dream. Something fantastical, right out of a storybook. That thought made him chuckle. Could anything be considered fantastical in a world of superpowers? Unicorns. Unicorns were fantastical." I'm trying to decide if this passage is a pro or a con to writing at one o'clock in the morning. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:39:08 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379915 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379915 BrendaGonet please ignore the horrid spelling...I haven't run a spell check. Oh and the thoughts are supposed to be in italics. Tue, 01 Nov 2011 22:41:37 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379982 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_379982 Melrudin It's not amazing, but I don't normally write outside of NaNo so I was quite proud of this. Marina glanced at her unlikely guide who was striding along purposefully with a huge grin planted firmly on her face. “So. Where are we going?” “Up. Up and up and up and up.” She said with such certainty that it seemed to warrant no response. “Lead the way then.” Marina rolled her eyes, throwing her hands up in resignation. This was not going quite as she had planned. They walked on in silence, though Elspenella always seemed on the verge of saying something and with her constant looking and nodding at just about everyone and everything they passed, she somehow managed to seem like she was giving a detailed explanation of everything in the tower despite never opening her mouth. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 02:06:50 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_383425 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_383425 sariaru "You know, the Garou tongue simply didn't sound quite right on the human tongue. It was a lot like trying to sing with a potato in your mouth after eight beers. Just...not a pretty sight." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 02:45:24 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_383894 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_383894 Obscurite_Asile Everyones is so good. It's not amazing but this made me laugh. “Easy. The blood I drink is absorbed into my cells while the sperm is sent to my testicles. When I want to have sex they are stimulated, I have an erection and well,” he chuckled, “You know the rest.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 04:55:06 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_385910 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_385910 lithle My first paragraph, which I'm unusually happy with. Later, Alissa wouldn't be able to pinpoint the exact moment she began to lose her mind. She would blame Michigan for that. She was in the habit of blaming it for most things. Newly arrived, she was so mired in her own sense of loss that the first little glitches in reality didn't sink in. Everything was strange. Everything hurt. If the colors seemed faded, if she kept finding herself incapable of breathing, wasn't that to be expected? Wed, 02 Nov 2011 07:19:06 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_388915 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_388915 KayOS This lovely little exchange made me smile: “So, what did I miss in Snoozology?” Alright, I know, it was a bad pun. Cut me some slack though: I was really tired. Megan shrugged. “Just some basic stuff. Zygotes, gametes… the same things we’ve been working on since Monday, really.” “Zebras and goatees?” The sad thing was, I was only half – joking. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 07:50:53 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_389738 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_389738 Inganorway Awww! Love that! Wed, 02 Nov 2011 08:05:25 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_390104 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_390104 Whitefairy24601 This is really good!!! And I have a Faye as well. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 08:07:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_390158 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_390158 Whitefairy24601 My latest paragraph: Laney didn’t get why people always complained about trees being bare in winter. They weren’t, it just wasn’t always leaves that always hung on them. Rather, millions of delicate white flakes clung on, like lovers knowing they would have to soon part. When the snow melted away the trees would forget of its friend’s existence and branches would live on as the snow melted into heartbroken tears. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 08:08:48 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_390203 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_390203 Inganorway I already posted my favourite bit in another thread, but oh well, here it comes again. Sorry it you've already read it: “I don’t know, Reece, he didn’t seem very interested the last time he was here.” Marion, the evil bitch, seemed determined to bring him back to reality. Reality bad. Fantasy good. “Yeah, I still don’t know what went wrong there. I literally spent two whole days bent over. Bending over the information stand as he passed, bending over the computer, dropping so many pens he must have thought I’d lost all power in my fingers, and bending over the ice machine on his floor on every break just on the off chance he would stop by so I could say hi. Maybe he’s married, or in the closet, or he doesn’t like my cologne.” “Desperation, by Calvin Klein,” Marion deadpanned. “Fuck you. At one point he was coming into the lounge just as I was getting some tea so I did a forward flip to get the cup, dropped the tea bag, bent over to get it, and finished off with a half bend to get the milk. Why has the man not fallen in love with me yet? I don’t get his problem. I mean, what does he not understand about my ass in his face every time he passes?” “Maybe he’s straight?” “Be gone, devil-woman, I will not listen to your heresy. He shall be mine! I have a new strategy, this time I will dazzle him with my wit and charm.” “Bent over, you’ll be talking out of your ass. You already are, come to think of it.” “Why am I talking to you again?” “Beats me, I just asked what time it was.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 08:15:44 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_390401 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_390401 fictionalboyfriend I have an unreasonable amount of love for this one. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 12:58:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_399046 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_399046 fictionalboyfriend "Of course, dear Reader, whoever said that it was not possible to build a ship which could fly to the moon had obviously never made the acquaintance of my father. Such a statement was, to him, nothing short of a challenge. And, seeing as he was rather the top air-ship engineer and designer of our era, the Crown saw fit to commission him as part of the team assembled to create the ship which would pierce the heavens and spit in the eye of God. Naturally, this made us rather unpopular." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 13:01:51 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_399169 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_399169 iymcool So far I have fallen in love with this statement a pries said to my main character: "The only true separation between the world and us is not both the wall and preordained laws, it is the stones alone. Stones and paper bind us here, as well as fear of a power that we ourselves have created. " Wed, 02 Nov 2011 14:39:58 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_402383 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_402383 brandnewriot3 My MC is called Faye, we should start a club. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 14:48:47 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_402705 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_402705 Replica616 "They called him the phantom of darkness. He thought that was ridiculous." It makes a lot more sense in context. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 14:50:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_402753 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_402753 Silenia [quote] My actions were led by what I saw and in return, what I saw was heavily influenced by my actions. [/quote] Wed, 02 Nov 2011 14:59:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403081 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403081 Silenia Seems like I somehow deleted everything outside my quote. Anyway, what I wanted to say was that, whether it makes sense or not, I like that quote, Replica. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 15:00:52 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403143 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403143 spooks101 my main character has something of an evil Spirit who annoys them periodically. Heres her reaction when the spirit appears again. "Just so you know, I've not missed you." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 15:20:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403865 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_403865 schmiss "Her hair was the orange-red of melted iron, tucked behind her, pieces coming loose and dancing about her face, sparks of blistering heat in the evening wind. A quizzical look on her strong-jawed face. She puckered her lips, thinking, and Sady was struck by the way her strong overbite made her look quite… carnivorous." [Yeah, she's evil, if that wasn't obvious. I'm not crazy about the "melted iron" bit, I'll replace that when I'm editing with something less awkward sounding that gets the same image across, but I like the rest of it.] Wed, 02 Nov 2011 15:35:00 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_404411 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_404411 Karsten I love this! Really dark and vivid. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 15:59:04 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_405301 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_405301 InClaraVoce (So far everything's very dull and my writing style has regressed to where it was about three years ago, but I actually like this sentence:) Sarek had promised her that marrying a Vulcan did not mean giving up her humanity or her selfhood, and it did not; nevertheless, outworlders called her Mrs. Sarek, and it bothered her. (Other than that, nothing good. It'll get better once we get some more humans into the picture.) Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:09:13 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_405715 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_405715 bbedlam "Cat picked up her burger and took a big, satisfying bite. Burger juice dripped down her chin. "This is better than sex," she said, softly so Bobbi wouldn't hear her. "It is sex on a bun. With bacon." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:23:55 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_406256 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_406256 DeliciousAmbiguity These two kind of go together, as they concern the same character: "Being the assistant of the Wicked Witch of the West Coast meant she was mostly ignored as she gathered her belongings and pulled on her light winter coat." + "Perhaps her horrid appearance was why Lucy had let her leave without so much as a fuss…it was unlikely, since that would mean that there was a heart buried somewhere under the crushed dreams, kicked puppies and pile of candy stolen from unsuspecting toddlers." This is from a phone conversation between my main character, Jana, and her best friend, Heather. I've come to positively adore Heather, even though she started out as one of my most minor character: “Get out of work early?” “Zeus, I wish!” Jana shook her head, smiling. “I can’t believe you haven’t quit doing that yet.” “What? I’ll cycle through the gods all I want. When I die, Ra-willing, I want to have all my bases covered, thank you very much.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:39:12 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_406853 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_406853 embyquinn I just broke the 1k word barrier! And here, for your approval, is a quick quote from the first chapter of my first novel in, oh, TWENTY YEARS... "Other than the occasional stop for gas, Naomi had no reason to venture off the interstate from Birmingham to Conchelle. Upstate Alabama held no interest for her. The gentle foothills blanketed with pine trees and interwoven with green-blue ribbons of water looked beautiful from the view of the highway, but that was the beginning and end of its attractions. She hadn't expected to see her home state again, from behind the wheel of her van or otherwise. She'd managed to escape, and she'd sworn never to look back. "God, or Fate, obviously had other plans. Certainly there had to be some esoteric guiding force, some omniscient intelligence whose covert machinations had driven her relentlessly along a prearranged path, closing off any avenue of escape as efficiently as a sheepdog herding a stray lamb. Morally, physically, and socially, she was obligated to do the very thing she had sworn was unthinkable. "She was going home because, quite simply, she had been left with no other choice." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:41:46 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_406962 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_406962 DeliciousAmbiguity Pro...unicorns are always a pro. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:46:11 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_407108 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_407108 MynaOphelia "The world ended in the standard way, although I was still a little pissed I didn't get to see it." First line, too. :) Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:48:30 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_407182 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_407182 Random da Shea Introducing my main character goes like this: &gt;&gt;The theft started it. It’s true the thief was hungry. True also he was clumsy. He reached for bread and when he found a snarling dog instead, he made a mistake and bit it. &lt;&gt;Rabbits did not take sides in the wars of men.&lt; Wed, 02 Nov 2011 17:44:35 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409300 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409300 Random da Shea *face/palm* The rabbit thing is an entirely separate part. Somehow... that happened. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 17:45:56 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409357 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409357 MouseyCat [quote]You're not sure whether you're actually really mad at Karkat or whether you're really just really mad at yourself for being sort of mad at Karkat, but you're mad about <em>something</em> and you need to destroy things but you don't want them to be shins so you're going to play fetch with yourself.[/quote] I think this is my favorite sentence just because of how it flows. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 18:00:48 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409952 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_409952 Jessari Not much in my current work that I find particularly witty or well-written. I'm going for quantity over quality this month, and doing some major polishing and refining in December. This is the only line that I feel is shareable at this point: "Big Louie," he protested, waving a spatula in the air. "You must call me Big Louie, Miss Katherine. I do not stand on ceremony, and neither do I sit upon it." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 18:03:30 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_410051 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_410051 Dreamer15 This is between a thug and a demon in the form of a human: “What are you?” Alexander’s throat shrank around the words, breaking them down the middle. “That doesn’t matter,” he said. “Not anymore, at least.” He went as still as a pillar, staring into Alexander’s eyes for a thousand eternities. Lightning flashed behind those dark eyes, cracking and rebounding within the irises. Then, slabs of clouds moved in, crowding the edges. A brittle, angry smile twisted his face. “But I know what you are. Surprising really. But I guess even someone with weak faith can still believe.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 18:55:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_411930 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_411930 hailtherandom Scene I wrote today at school: Adam laughed too. “Either way,” he said, “I brought this for you. Just to be safe.” He took her hand in his and put something small and metal into it. Alix held it up to the light. It was a small pendant on a chain. A gold figure glinted off of the surface as the pendant twisted from side to side. "It’s a Saint Christopher pendant,” said Adam, “if you’ve never seen one before. He’s the patron saint of traveling. To protect you on your travels. I took it with me when I left home seven years ago. I wear it every day. I want you to take it to Venice. You can give it back when you come home in one piece.” Alix felt a knot of guilt mixed with gratitude form in her stomach. “It’s beautiful, Adam. Thank you, so much.” [...] Adam nodded, seemingly at a loss for words. He took the pendant from Alix’s hand and turned the circle of metal over to reveal four words engraved in the back. St. Christopher Protect Me. “Saint Christopher protect you, Alix,” he said, almost forced. “Come back to us, yeah?” “Yeah,” Alix whispered, her voice catching in her throat. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 19:17:01 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412639 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412639 Arlecchina "It is never advisable to chronicle a great tale while drunk." My narrator's best line so far. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 19:18:00 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412671 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412671 DalanieBeach The scene I just wrote: The pain came from the scratchy canvas bags I was being thrust onto, and the hunger came from my burning, empty stomach. My mind filled me in on the vital details of who I was while I lay in shock on the floor of the wagon. I was fourteen, my name was Anna Marie, the year was 1946, and I was being thrown into this wagon because I was being arrested for housing a Jew in my home. Whew, that’s enough to make you wanna click your heels together and crawl back under the rainbow. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 19:18:16 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412678 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_412678 Willow. That's an awesome first line. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 20:12:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_414598 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_414598 Willow. My favorite so far, not sure how great it is but I like it anyways. And I have to say there are a lot of really great quotes here. They stole the air from my lungs. The happiness from my mind. Movement from every bone and muscle in my body. They took my father from me. Angela lay collapsed against the front door, Mark pulling her into an endearing embrace trying to comfort her. I was a still photo, mounted in the halls of a museum. A sculpture of stone in a rose laced garden labyrinth. Despair hung in the air. My mother had escaped the scene but I could still hear her sobs from the other side of the shut door. In my head I was screaming, running after the armored cars that were tearing my family apart. In reality, the idea of crying or even reaching my hand to wipe a tear from my cheek was far too complex. It was impossible. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 20:14:40 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_414677 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_414677 Kaylyn This is my favorite paragraph from everything I've done so far. I dunno, it just came out really well, at least in comparison to the rest of the stuff I've done. "Where there once had been seeping, rotting wounds all over his torso, there were now completely healed scars, still caked in filth, but healed. As his bonds were released he sat up shakily, yet he felt stronger than he'd ever felt in his life. He also had the oddest sensation that he was somehow pulling on the men surrounding him, not physically, but as if something, some energy within him was inhaling and taking in the energy within the others. He had a sudden urge to lash out and pin down one of them, to drain them completely of their energy, but he fought to maintain control, certain that it would mean his death if he were to kill one of them. And he suddenly knew that if he were to do what he so desperately wanted to do, that it would most certainly result in his victim's death. And this both terrified him and excited him at the same time, and the urge to do just that continued to grow." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 20:25:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_415043 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_415043 Whitefairy24601 This is very good. I am quite impressed. Like button? We need a love button. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 20:32:07 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_415274 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_415274 nicknameminaj I love this line for some reason. Makes me think of Drunk History. Do not look it up. It will suck you in. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:01:47 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416231 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416231 Eleirah Hehe, this is my favourite line so far, for no particular reason... "The man known as Jormungandr, the World Serpent, the creature destined to help bring about the end of the world, made a faint noise that sounded almost like a whimper." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:08:15 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416456 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416456 IsLikeaSong "At the center of the playground was a rather unwieldy oak tree. The good people at the Darling Arboretum had proclaimed it to be one of the oldest trees in the town, and it was a source of great pride for the residents of Darling, who were, quite aptly, called Darlings. Age and prestige notwithstanding, it had long been a gathering place for the town's children. Generations of kids had longed to scale its branches and reach the highest of the branches that could, in theory, hold a person. But the fact remained that that highest point was a good forty-five feet off the ground, and even the bravest kid found this excessive height to be more than a little bit daunting, and more often than not the more courageous climbers would sell themselves short and stop almost as soon as they reached about twenty-five feet. The only person that Rita and Felicia knew who had surpassed that height was Sebastian Maduro—Rita's older brother, who had a reputation for being crazy enough to try anything that could possibly land him in the hospital at least once. He'd reached a branch that was, by their estimate, about thirty-two feet up, and had managed to climb all the way back down before one of the nosy Pod Mommies had the chance to whip out her cell phone and call Mrs. Maduro to inform her that her son was not just flirting with Death, but seriously trying to get up her skirt." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:23:54 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416925 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416925 taestyy "He looks down into the dark emptiness of the box and at the bottom, curled up in a pathetic little wet ball is what makes his heart waver and all the stone walls he’s put up come melting down. Without really thinking, Heechul reaches down into the box, his hands brushing against cold, wet skin as a weak cough shakes the frame of the small unconscious boy curled up on his side." I like the first sentence a lot --- may need to rewrite the second one &gt;&lt; Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:26:06 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416981 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_416981 monkeychild truly that paragraph is a thing of beauty. I would like to subscribe to your newsletter. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:46:36 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_417512 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_417512 dangerously_dru This is great! Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:47:17 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_417537 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_417537 monkeychild I am totally in the 'pro' camp on this one too. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:49:35 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_417607 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_417607 monkeychild that is wonderfully vivid, as well as being highly amusing. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:50:39 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_417641 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=2#forum_thread_comment_417641 TIgrisInvictus The bulk of my 3400 words so far is ball-busting between two of my main characters. "How goes the training?" Brand asked. "Boring as ever. Sometimes I wonder if I'll never know what it feels like to plunge this blade into my enemy's belly!" Zain replied, holding his spear up for a moment before letting it drop back into the bed of the wagon with a clatter. "Blade? Hardly. I've seen spoons sharper than that thing. And since when did you have enemies? Have you been hiding a malicious streak from me?" "Oh, you know what I mean. I have to be ready for ravening marauders, threatening us at our very doorstep!" Brand laughed. "You have to be kidding. You're kidding, right?" "I am not!" Zain said, suddenly indignant. "When I become a guardsman of the watch I'll be expected to lay down my life in the defense of this city in the event of invasion!" "Don't flatter yourself, Zain. You're going to be a gate guard like your father, and his father, and his father before him. You'll be a doorman, only you'll get to carry a nice pointy stick, and the door you'll be watching happens to be very big." And later, after a brief chat with one of the girls in town... "I'm going to dance with Dynaria in the square at the festival, and I'll bet you a drink she ends up in my bed tonight," Brand said. "I won't have it! You know I've been in love with her since I've been old enough to notice girls." "Zain, loving someone for two whole weeks just isn't enough to mean anything to me." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:54:46 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_417750 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_417750 monkeychild Here are a few I like so far: “You need to come say ‘hello’ and be pleasant.” She continued. “You can have one or the other, but not both.” I returned her glare. “Grandmother frisked me and took my flask, I’m becoming terrifyingly sober.” and: “I can’t let every crazed psychopath carrying odd weapons ruin my enjoyment of campy television, otherwise I would have had to give-up watching all the Dr. Who episodes that featured Daleks after that guy tried to rob that bookstore downtown with a trashcan and a toilet plunger. And I’m sorry but I am not giving up my David Tennant.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 21:59:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_417885 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_417885 mixolydian320 Jokingly said from one character to another after they first move in together and are discussing weird secrets the other doesn't know about: "Deal, as long as you promise to never look me up online," he said in all faux seriousness. "See, I'm actually an international super-spy turned porn star. It's all on my Facebook page, but I really don't want it to come between us." Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:05:55 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418038 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418038 TypoMania His eloquent expression of grief on my behalf was, “Balls, man.” Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:13:15 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418198 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418198 unashamed.love "That quirky Miss Olivia, she couldn’t sing, and she couldn’t dance, but she did anyway, and it was beautiful, in its own weird little way." It just perfectly describes Olivia. :D Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:14:24 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418232 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_418232 Seera [quote]"There you are little sis," a male voice said as Keturah felt a hand land on her shoulder. Keturah turned sharply to face who placed their hand on her and glared at her brother, "Silas! You just about gave me a heart attack!" Silas laughed and hugged his little sister, "Should I go find that chief trainer person and tell him you get heart attacks easily." "Ha ha, very funny," Keturah said, returning the hug, "I thought your ship wasn't supposed to get here until another thirty minutes or so?" "One of the stopping points was closed down. Apparently some contagious disease had become pandemic. Government officials are afraid that if they keep that port open, it will become an epidemic." "I hope you don't get sent off there then." "What's the fun in that, though?" "And what if father gets ill again? You won't be able to pay your final respects should the city still be quarantined." "And here I thought you didn't want me to get sick." Keturah glared at her brother, "Of course I don't." "Just teasing you, sis. Relax. Anyways, what did you decide to do about the proposition?"[/quote] Really love how it moved from the characters finding each other to discussing the plot point. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:19:15 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_418346 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_418346 supersinger473 “Oh please, if I knocked it would just give the precious baby a chance to jump out the window to avoid me.” “Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What are you talking about? Because I was talking about sex and I have it on good word from like seventy-six people that I rock at that.” “Mastication Corporation can smooch my bankrupt white ass you smelly, pirate, hooker!” “Weeeeeeee,” “That name is too long, but I need a name for you,” she said to her Impetus Science Incorporated Handheld Jump Increasing Device, “I think I’ll call you Chekhov, do you like that name Chekhov?” Chekhov did not respond because Chekhov is an inanimate object. Wed, 02 Nov 2011 23:32:30 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_419932 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_419932 FreakierThanThou "New car?" Kalina asked. Lacey opened the passenger-side door for her. "Yeah, my bosses gave it to me. Apparently my extraterrestrial guests I'll be having next month wouldn't be impressed with my normal one." "Oh, that's not fair," said Kalina. "How do they know that?" "I know, right?" "After all, maybe on their planet, dust and grime are sacred or something." Lacey hit her lightly on the arm. "Don't talk about my car that way." All this on the way to a funeral. I'm going to love writing these two. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 03:44:46 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_422958 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_422958 Driftwings I'm proud of this simply because it was the first bit of my story notes to carry over into the actual story. They're discussing a magical hour glass my MC was eyeing. It has the power to allow the user to return to any one moment in time. “I mean that even if you go back and stop your loved one from dying;” He continued, eyeing her all too knowingly, “It will not change the fact that they 'will' die. It may not happen right away but eventually Death will come and they will die. Those whose names are already written within the book of Souls can never truly return to the world of the living; not without Death himself striking their names from that book.” Thu, 03 Nov 2011 05:36:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_424488 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_424488 heather_rawriee Can I just say, speaking as a Heather, that the phone conversation is great? ;) Actually I love all your quotes, I'm really intrigued by your story now! Thu, 03 Nov 2011 05:54:00 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_424814 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_424814 StarFoxMcCloud [quote=] "You have no idea," he muttered. "You know, I used to complain about my boring life and now two bombshells in one day. Why me?” "Because not all of us have the privilege of being part of the chosen race," Christophe answered with a grin. "You're an angel," Mordecai responded sarcastically. About to respond, “it’s just what I do,” Christophe looked over and saw his friend’s concerned face. He hadn’t seen Mordecai with a look this serious, since… well… "Something happened," he declared. "That's not just Christophe Totally Owned Me With His Mad Wit face. That's Christophe Totally Owned Me with His Mad with plus Something Happened face." [/quote] There's something about the snark of best friendship that just GETS me. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 06:20:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_425327 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_425327 heather_rawriee My character found her personality! Oh happy days, she's no longer the more-boring-than-a-box-of-Bran-flakes-girl. "Valerie hadn’t responded. She didn’t want to start yet another argument about her choice of associates. It wasn’t so much that her mother was overprotective; she was more an anxious, insane control freak. Valerie shot a quick glance over towards her mother, who was watching the television with as much enjoyment as a 50 year old woman could get out of a cop film, before turning back to her book. She could understand it if she was like one of those girls in the magazines – the pretty, popular ones who always got invited to parties and had it off with a different, nameless guy every week. But no: her life was hardly a whirlwind of social gatherings, text messages and boyfriends. The most exciting her life ever got was the slightly creepy man who wandered into Darling Buds from time to time and tried to flirt with her. She sighed and turned the page, although she wasn’t really paying much attention to the words now. The shimmered and moved on the thin cream page and didn’t amount to anything logical at all. Valerie lived in her own world. That was the only way to describe it, she guessed. When your life doesn’t go anywhere further than the four walls of your house, the only place it can go is inside your mind." I know it's long but I love this entire section because I'm finally finding out who my character is :) Thu, 03 Nov 2011 06:47:04 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_425807 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_425807 heather_rawriee Gah. Now I spot mistakes. Fuck you, inner editor, I was proud of this a few moments ago! Thu, 03 Nov 2011 06:50:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_425870 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_425870 MoonPuppy1316 "You see, a secret proves a weakness, one that could kill you. If you admit to that weakness now you have a chance of being able to protect yourself efficiently, should you continue to try and ignore the truth, you put yourself at risk. If someone finds out without you wanting them to… It can be used against you. It could destroy you." -- "That’s the awesome thing about it being your story. You get to tell it any way you want,” Both sides of the coin from two completely opposite characters. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 08:23:07 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_428109 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_428109 Inganorway Briliant first line. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 08:52:34 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_428873 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_428873 monkeychild I want to read your novel so much I can taste it, it tastes like awesome with a hint of nutmeg. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 08:58:17 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_429022 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_429022 michaelmichael Dennis was a writer. It was the only thing he was qualified to do. That and drinking. Writing and drinking. He qualified the latter by citing Hemingway but never elaborated, mostly because he was drunk whenever the subject came up. People would ask him why he drank so much. He would reply, “Well, you know, Hemingway...” and leave it at that, sometimes physically, walking away to get another drink. No one was ever satisfied, up to and including Dennis, but he was drunk so he never noticed. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 09:56:57 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_430535 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_430535 Sinoda Kinda out of context....But here's a bit that keeps making me laugh when I read it. "Soon," I kept thinking, "It will be ME with the gigantic bathroom! Everyone will want to come over to my house, and see my bathroom. I'll make them wait in line, and pay admission! Just to see where I use the toilet!" Distracted by my fantasies of bathroom parties, I failed to pay attention to the road. I felt a loud *bump*. I slammed by brakes, and looked forward. There was a hooded man, lying on the street directly in front of my car. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 10:04:53 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_430753 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_430753 Driftwings O_o Now I want to know more! :D Thu, 03 Nov 2011 11:46:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_433529 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_433529 Labman I don't know why, but this is my favourite line in my novel so far: "The rebellion began the same way most rebellions do, with an oppressed party being pressed just a little too far." Thu, 03 Nov 2011 12:21:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_434497 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_434497 Mr. Z Umm... אדטו לקח נשימה עמוקה – הוא פשוט לא יכול היה להתנגד. חמישים קונונים לשבוע היה סכום הגון למדי. זה אומר מאתיים קונונים בחודש – וזו גבוהה מספיק כדי לפרנס משפחה שלמה, משפחה אמידה. "אתה יודע שאני רווק, נכון?" שאל אדטו, בלי לחשוב על כך אפילו. אקרנדה חזר למקומו וצחק. "שנינו לא עקביים במיוחד, לא? אנשים רציניים כל-כך, תוקעים בדיחות בכל מקום." "Adetto took a deep breath - he just couldn't resist. Fifty Conons a week was a fairly high number. It means two hundred Conons a month - and that's enough to support a whole family, a wealthy one. "You do know I'm single, right?" Adetto asked, without even thinking. "Aqarande returned to his seat and laughed heartily. "We both aren't very consistent, are we? Such serious men, joking whenever they can." Thu, 03 Nov 2011 13:14:34 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436186 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436186 Sidney Bristol The Rollers wore white, spandex uniforms consisting of a white tank top with silver lame accents over their shoulders and sides, and silver lame shorts that made each girl’s [censored] look like the ball hitch on a pickup truck. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 13:19:30 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436331 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436331 mutewitness This is stupid really, but here it is... "I don't think it's appropriate to be wearing a dress in the air!" Louisa yelled, trying to be heard over all the loud noises. "Then don't wear one!" Aleric responded. And this one: Aleric came up behind her, "Scared?" "I don't want to land in a pile of potatoes." Louisa said, looking at him. "I didn't land in potatoes, I landed in a pile of tomatoes. It was messier." Thu, 03 Nov 2011 13:21:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436382 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_436382 Zozz Oh, I really like that, it says a lot about the character in such few words :) Thu, 03 Nov 2011 14:11:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_438085 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_438085 Comma-Guitar-Pirate [quote]“What’re you doing with a horse?” “I caught him wild in Chloris and I’ve been trying to tame him for a few months.” “I see it’s going well, what with all his stampeding and knocking people into trees. You of course realize I’m going to murder you with that broken carrot you’re holding there? I don’t like people leaving my three-year-old son alone out in the woods.” Carnus frowned at the carrot still clutched in his hand, then at his younger brother. “What, this carrot? Forget the carrot, that’s just horse food,” he said, tossing it over his shoulder. “<em>I’ve</em> managed to catch a duck.” Ornos now saw his brother had a dead duck slung over his shoulder, as he held it up by its neck. “How am I supposed to kill you with a dead duck?” “It’s for cooking, not for murder.”[/quote] Or... [quote]“I’m home, loving family! And I brought the main course!” This exclamation was followed by the loud and angry honk of the goose Carnus was struggling to keep hold of, who obviously wanted nothing to do with being anyone’s main course. Already rather cross, Melia came storming out of the kitchen with her rolling pin held up, and rounded on Ornos, who struggled to keep a straight face. “I told you to tell him not to—” “I told him when I saw he had a dead duck. I guess he decided to go for a live one instead.” She turned to glare threateningly at Carnus, smacking her rolling pin against her palm in an equally imposing fashion; her target grinned even as his new feathery acquaintance was head-butting him in the jaw.[/quote] I've giggled through pretty much any scene I've written with Carnus and Ornos together. They're ridiculously fun. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 14:33:02 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_438873 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_438873 newtown11 "The Freedom Bus of Freedom begins to slow, then suddenly the wheels shriek as E hits the brakes. The sheer jankiness of the ride as a whole is raised to the fifthteenththousandth power (don't doubt me on this) as the van skips and breakdances over the curb into the E-Z Mart parking lot. E sighs, then “c'mon asshats, let's roll.” P, A, and H flip out quick, but I just drift out, unsure if I'm actually going out to get something edible or if I'm practicing the role of slovenly AP Studio Art student in a play about cocaine abuse." Describing bounce music in New Orleans: "We dropped ourselves right in the heart of the city, and as I could've expected, got greeted by 808 rolls, Triggerman loops, and chant after chant of BACK IT UP YALL GET BACK NOW CUT IT UP BACK BACK BACK ROLL WID IT WHERE DEY AT BACK WIT IT ROLL IT CUT IT GOTTA GET IT GET IT GET IT SHAKE IT LIKE SHAKE SHAKE IT LIKE SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE—hectic? Nah, this is grand." Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:06:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_440004 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_440004 Jraine “Oh crap yeah, I remember that! Let’s hope this party Is a little bit calmer this time, let’s just have fun for once!” Typical, when Adam and Reine were together things rarely went smoothly, but Adam smiled and lifted his bottle and in a toast to his friend “To a normal party then!” It wasn’t a normal party. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:38:35 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441119 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441119 voter_colonel My favourite novel quotes are all from the infrequent moments of obvious humour in my story, this being my favourite of the lot, after my characters run over an animal: Michaelduke leaned out of the window. "What did we hit?" "Some sort of animal," Terrell called back, "a flying one." "What species is it, do you know?" Terrell thought for a second, then answered, "A critter." "Can you be more specific?" Another pause from Terrell, then the reply, "A dead critter." Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:38:42 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441121 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441121 tinkerbinker For some reason people really like this line - "It was a bright and sunny day that Zeus granted one lone scholar the ability to travel through time. " But I personally like this one - “Well, darling Bion… I am loath to say it, but it looks to be more of the crumbling sculpture of a fool then the grand work of a lifetime.” Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:51:07 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441528 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441528 SwiftstarDawn “I said, I’m very proud of you for handling things the way you did,” my shrink repeats, another equally vapid—but unnervingly real—smile on his own face. He shivers in the cold and breathes into his hands, rubbing together like he’s trying to start a fire. “It was very mature of you to accept the consequences of your actions and step down the way you did. We’re all very proud.” By “we,” does he mean Niam? Mayrith? Ally? Or the city in general? If it’s the latter, I would imagine they’re less “proud” and more “grateful.” No more disastrous attempts at leadership from the child. Now we can have a leader who takes charge, a leader who knows what she’s doing. That's a little snip from my very first chapter :) Already over 8k! HOW AM I DOING THIS? Thu, 03 Nov 2011 15:58:46 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441768 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_441768 Whitefairy24601 We really ought to. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 16:19:58 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_442498 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_442498 BrBckRider This is my favorite so far, just because I had no idea I was writing it, until it was written. "I know about the folder hidden in your Expense Reports folder that doesn't contain expense reports." She paused for effect and plied him with her patented "Grandmother" expression. "Really, Nate. Dolphins?" After I wrote, I spent 10 minutes trying to figure out what could be on Nate's computer. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 17:59:22 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445560 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445560 BrBckRider Ha! I really like that. It made me literally LOL. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:00:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445588 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445588 abby-LOVE Carlsbad hardly ever comes to these gatherings. It's not really hard to understand why. I tend to ignore him for the most part, and he never gets to play any of our video games. I don't know what he does instead, but I imagine it's similar to whatever he does while I'm at school. He probably stays home and watches television or goes out in the woods and tortures small animals or something. He's pretty silent on the subject. ---- Ignore the awkward phrasing. I'm just very fascinated about what Carlsbad does in his free time. He's imaginary. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:02:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445671 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445671 Impignorate "Thirty-six days. That’s how long he had been in the lightless room, or so he guessed. He carefully brushed his fingers against the coarse wooden floor he sat on and counted each notch he’d carved. Thirty-seven he counted this time. He wasn’t entirely sure whether or not he was counting a notch of his own or a scratch that had been engraved there long before he had arrived. It was difficult to tell. With a sigh, he picked a splinter from under his fingernail and decided to leave it at thirty-six. If he dwelled on it for too long, he would lose his mind, and he couldn’t afford to lose the only thing that still belonged to him." This is my opening paragraph, and I'm ridiculously happy with it after my English Literature teacher (who's notorious for harsh criticism) said it was one of the best opening paragraphs she's read in a long while. Eeeee! Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:07:17 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445797 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445797 Impignorate Oh my God, that's brilliant. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:07:42 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445811 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=4#forum_thread_comment_445811 Supermatz I love this thread =DDD you guys are going so well!! keep up the funny stuff! I could give you a quotation of what one of my main characters thinks of geeks but that is a biiiit lengthy.. got carried away trololo =P g'night people!!! Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:23:09 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_446287 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_446287 R_C_LandPsMommy05 A funny one I just made up today when Caden was seeing his mom again. She's dead. “Oh god, I said. “You mean I can see dead people? Like that kid in the movie? Mom, please no.” Thu, 03 Nov 2011 18:58:51 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_447363 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_447363 youjerkmuffin. "I can’t believe math made me question the righteousness of my penis, oh my god." --the eloquent Conrad Rowan, everybody. Thu, 03 Nov 2011 21:13:21 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_451334 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_451334 Meowzbark He stared at her; his lips parted into a cold smile. “Ask your daughter, Mrs. Durant.” Thu, 03 Nov 2011 21:16:42 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_451436 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_451436 misszalicia my fav today: Her breathe left her in a quick huff as he picked her up and settled her on his shoulder, barbarian style. "I think I should tell you, I'm afraid of heights," she said in a low whisper as she closed her eyes to avoid seeing the great distance from where she was perched and the ground. "Love, that's the least of your concerns." Fri, 04 Nov 2011 09:12:59 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_462616 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_462616 R_C_LandPsMommy05 A big long one, but my favorite thing I wrote today: “Am I crazy for being able to see you?” I said. “Aren’t you dead?” “Yes, but since when has being dead made me not be able to be seen? Many people see dead people. They just don’t talk about it. They think it’s too strange. Your father sees me. He helps me. Soon I’m gonna go over the rainbow to the other side. Bur right now, I’m still here. Tell you what, man. Just because you can’t see me, doesn’t mean I’m not there,” said Justin that first day I admitted to seeing him. “Just because you can’t see something, doesn’t mean it’s not real, right?” “Right. What do I tell my sister, though? I don’t want her to grow up and put me in a place like this like Uncle Rob did.” “That’s what you tell her then. If you tell her at all. It’s perfectly fine to see me. People just think it’s weird because they can’t. Sure, there are bad dead people, and you’ll probably see them, but it doesn’t mean the guys like us aren’t there.” “Are you all in need of help? To get over the rainbow I mean?” “No,” said Justin. “Some people, their heaven is here, you know, in this world, so that’s where they stay. But God created a heaven for me somewhere else. Only I don’t know how to get there. I’m trying to figure it out.” Fri, 04 Nov 2011 09:34:37 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_463128 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_463128 Ellen G My current favorite: "I kissed her then, our bodies hovering almost a foot apart, so only our lips bridged the gap between us. When we broke apart, we were both smiling. It’s important to me, now, to remember that the smiles came first." Fri, 04 Nov 2011 09:53:40 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_463547 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_463547 G.B. Walker My first paragraph (see more in my excerpt): It was early morning and cold when I found him, seemingly dead, lying at an unnatural angle on a rotting log. His face and light hair stained red with blood that had flown from a gash on his forehead, he seemed almost like a fallen soldier from another era – what with his torn, muddy, black jeans and the frayed USMC camouflage jacket he wore over an army green T-shirt that said, in fading orange letters, “Hunting: An American Tradition.” On his feet, though, were only socks. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 10:24:47 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_464200 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_464200 G.B. Walker Um, you realize that Gaia is a major planet in Asimov's later Foundation novels. It is the one where all share a kind of consciousness, even the rocks. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 10:27:43 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_464278 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_464278 G.B. Walker I like that. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 11:26:35 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_465651 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_465651 G.B. Walker [quote=Kalyndie] Just wrote this one and I am immensely proud of it, although that might be the late hour talking. "His eyes were a little too cold, and something about the hand that he extended to her put her in mind of machinery, as if by reaching out and taking hold of it, she could feel the wires underneath his skin, pulsing like veins." [/quote] That is, I like this. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 11:27:18 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_465672 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_465672 Kyhaara Here are my two favourite passages: (Beginning) This morning, I discovered a dragon ― a living, breathing, honest-to-goodness dragon, peering at me from the inside of my sock drawer. (Near middle/end of first chapter) "Suddenly, the name of a course caught my eye: “Mythological Creature Studies - Introduction to Dragons.” I blinked, but the name remained unchanged. I checked the site inside and out to confirm that this was indeed the authentic university site. And it was, indeed, listing a course in a faculty that previously did not exist. I read the description, and with each sentence, my eyes widened. If this wasn't real, then I was either hallucinating or the victim of a practical joke. I couldn't discount this. After all, I now cared for an actual dragon, and if that wasn't strange, then nothing was. ---- This course provides background information on the magical, biological and psychological properties of dragons in Evionarian culture. The central topic is their empathic interaction with humans and the impact the two species have on each other. Having a dragon bond is not required for this course, although it is mandatory for future studies. ----- My finger hesitated over the ADD button, but my dragonet made the decision for me: from her perch on my shoulder, she lashed out with her tail and pressed down on the mouse, adding the course to the schedule." Fri, 04 Nov 2011 12:51:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_467852 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_467852 kat716 She could do this. She got over her phobia of guns, didn't she? This was only a shovel. Just a garden tool. It wasn't like it was the /same/ shovel, some sort of Travelling Shovel of Death that went around killing people. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 17:45:49 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_476144 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_476144 Skyuni123 Uh.. I just wrote this one.. (I'm not even sure how Luke turned out bixsexual. I intended for him to be straight... You start to worry about your sanity when your story begins to write itself.) -Ben stood as well. At 5'10, he loomed over Luke by at least an inch or two. "So, what you are trying to say is that you're gay then?" Luke sighed and hit the palm of his hand with his forehead. "There are more sexualities than just gay and straight, you ignorant man. I'm bloody bisexual!"- And another: - “So.. Erica... Why didn't your dad even acknowledge me?” Zackary asked, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice. “Oh, he's just very protective.” Erica said dismissively, already hard at work sifting through the dry soil. “So protective he's ignoring me?” Zackary asked. “Look, I don't know! I can't exactly put myself in the shoes of a forty one year old gay archeologist, you know!” Erica snarled. - :) Fri, 04 Nov 2011 18:55:38 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_477498 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_477498 SetsunaSakamoto The (short) extent of my epicness: “This is a special story,” her mother emphasised. “This story is one that should be learned from, one that you should examine for lessons and remember closely. This is the story of our greatest mistake.” Fri, 04 Nov 2011 20:11:07 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_479966 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_479966 midnightsunryze "Mardis began descending the mountain, hopping from rock to rock. She was furious and distraught. Galdur rose and leapt after her. He caught up to her quickly. Gripping onto a tall rock, he raised both legs in the air and sent his feet crashing into her back. She somersaulted down the cliff like a tumbleweed before landing at the bottom of a dark ravine. Galdur kicked some small rocks down the hole after her and spat. He would not be made a fool by his human loving mother and half-bred brother. He returned to the keep and promptly found a willing female to seed." I don't think it's my best writing, but it really captures the character of Galdur. What a tool, killing his own mother like that. I kind of hate that guy. Too bad he is really important later in my book, or I'd just off him and move on. :[ Fri, 04 Nov 2011 20:55:52 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481280 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481280 devynnebarret "Are you sure that’s a good idea? I know it’s your farm, and you will obviously make any last changes, but let’s be honest. You hired me because I was dumped unconscious into your pigs’ crap corner. " Fri, 04 Nov 2011 21:06:58 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481584 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481584 I_Just_Want_To_Fly This is a quote from a part where one of her only friends has nearly cracked his skull open. She's only known him for two months, and they're inseparable. They've saved each others' lives more than a thousand times already. They share a special connection that neither true love or siblinghood could give alone- incredible trust. Please, I thought desperately. Please, please, please, if there is a god out there, would you please listen to me? Do anything to me, or to the Captain or the Professor. But not Tintin or Delanie. They’re my first friends in this world, and the only people here who don’t give me weird looks. They’re the only mutants here besides me, and I don’t want them getting hurt. Amen. Fri, 04 Nov 2011 21:15:48 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_481836 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_481836 Sydaliance From Chapter 1: The first of appearance of Xi And she spoke. “Had a good run in the game of Life, didn’t you, Harold Seventer? Took lots of lives. Condemned lots to a life worse than hell. You probably have a list of accomplishments ten kilometers long, don’t you?” Harold attempted to reply, but she cut him off. “Well, that being the case and all, I figure you want your otherworldly rewards sooner rather than later, right? Good works and all that jazz, yeah? Well, have fun in Neverland, sweetie.” She pulled the trigger. _______ From Chapter 2: Xi's explanation of, well, everything... “Please. Me? Crazy? I will have you know I am the least crazy person in all of Altea! Well, at least less crazy than you normies, anyway. I supposed you couldn’t exactly count the Execs and AJAs as crazy, unless you also consider downright evil to be crazy as well, in which case they would be the craziest motherfuckers that have ever walked the surface of the Earth!” Her smiled stretched across her face. Same Chapter, next scene: Xi snorted. “They mean everything to you. But you mean nothing to them anymore, honey. And you won’t. Ever again. So the best thing to do is just to treat them the same. Move on. And if you have any sense of decency whatsoever, you’ll stop having little bitch fits and start contributing to something that will prevent others from becoming sad, forgotten little girls like you. I mean, unless you’re so crass as to think they deserve the same fate because you don’t deserve to be alone in your torment. In which case, you’re free to leave and get swiped up by the AJA, for all I care. However, in the case of former—that is, pulling your…as meager as it may be…weight around here—then there’s food in the fridge, a nice big oven and stove for you to cook some in and, of course, copious amounts of liquor.” _______ And I'll stop before I post TOO much and get in trouble. xD Fri, 04 Nov 2011 21:20:29 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481965 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_481965 I_Just_Want_To_Fly This is from the part where they just found out about the traitor. What I love about it is that there's a traitor and she's talking about it like it's daily business. “Tintin? Are you like, even awake?” Delanie asked. He sat up. “Yeah, I’m awake. What happened?” “Well, I followed Captain Kirk into a storage room, and then the lights went out. I panicked, falling off of a huge tower of crates I had made, and managed to land safely. There was a sickening thud, then people yelling. Who’s Wolf? Someone mentioned a dude named Wolf and I totally panicked and thought there were wolves. And then I heard a gunshot, and I ran towards it and landed bumped into a wall- hard. It hurt. I want a painkiller. And chocolate. And other random candy and a Sprite. But anyways. I felt around and found a pipe. I crawled through it and ended up in a cave. I was trying to make sure the wound on your head wasn’t fatal when someone picked me up and tried to kill me. So I kicked him where it counts, and he hit the wall. I found a gun, and someone else attacked me. The third person I attacked- they said there was a double agent working here. And then someone else knocked me out. What a bitch! I mean, they knocked me out! What kind of a- whatever, were you even listening to me?” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:00:05 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_494557 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_494557 Sea Dwweller oh m y G O D I LOVE YOU. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:25:26 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495171 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495171 Sea Dwweller “You can’t actually smell rape… right?” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:27:31 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495218 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495218 Lucy_Pryde These are all rather fantastic; you had me laughing and/or thoroughly entertained. Here's my favorite today: Two days later, Atticus used an expensive silver steak knife to pry a piece of gravel from between his two front teeth. Being chosen as King by his bowler hat had its advantages and drawbacks. While the steak knife was indeed a piece of art, he felt that being explosively ejected from a speeding boxcar had leaned towards the harsher side of “drawbacks.” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 11:39:00 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495482 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_495482 Whispy360 A few of my favorites: ... He turned and walked back into the cover of the trees. He was the sort of individual who ought to have slipped soundlessly everywhere, but he was reassuringly human - the leaves crunched loudly under his feet all the same. I had looked everywhere for the impressive, long coat that people always wore in movies, but I had never found one that suited me. I had found long, impressive black coats, but I preferred bright colors that seared your eyes. The coat I was wearing now was just an average length, and had no air of awesomeness to it at all. He stopped short just in the middle of what might have been a rather humorous story on his attempts to milk a cow. “I never realized just how angry cows could get when you mistake them for the wrong gender-" Sat, 05 Nov 2011 12:01:13 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_496052 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_496052 Britterscotch "Gaia" is the name for an ancient earth goddess. Greek I think. She pre-dated Asimov by centuries. If not millenniums. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 13:56:52 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_499105 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_499105 biki576 my MC describing his bedroom: My white walls were bare except for the one above my bed. There was a massive poster of Freddie Mercury there, all dressed up in his leather pants, orange tie, and lack of shirt. Maybe not the best snapshot to display over one’s bed, but Donna gave it to me. What can you do? Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:11:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_499484 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_499484 Calista.Artemis [quote] After a few more minutes, I started singing. “Another head hangs lowly, child is slowly taken. And the violence, cause of silence, who are we mistaken?….” Cobalt and Bismuth turned their heads slowly and looked at me as if I really were off my rocker. “Zombie,” I informed them, which I think confirmed their suspicion. “Uhm… What was that?” Bismuth asked me, looking genuinely afraid. “I was just singing.” I said, “Was it really that bad?” “What’s singing?” Cobalt asked me. “Quit acting dumb,” I told them, speeding up my pace. “No, I’m serious!” Cobalt rolled faster, trying to catch up with me, “What is singing? Was it what you were just doing?” I stopped in my tracks, “No Led, that’s what I was just doing!” “How do you do that?” Bismuth asked me, coming up to me and standing at my side, “That’s really cool!” I looked at them skeptically, “You both really don’t know?” They shook their heads. “Well, then. Singing is joining your words together in a rhythmic tune.” They looked at me as if I’d just told them the answer to life was 42. [/quote] Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:37:25 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_500314 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_500314 kat716 "Now Hibari, don't do anything you'll regret later." Hibari bared his teeth in what was definitely NOT a smile. "I won't." Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:38:39 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500357 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500357 Calista.Artemis I love that. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:43:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500494 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500494 Calista.Artemis I want to read your book. o_o Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:46:23 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_500591 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_500591 GotReins Here's a quote in my novel from a day when I was really tired: My mind was wandering. It was traveling across the seven continents in a sailboat made of cinnamon. Thoughts were occasionally passing through, little ones saying that maybe I shouldn’t have stayed up quite so late last night walking home from the stupid party. Just substitute "...maybe I shouldn't have stayed up quite so late last night trying to get past my daily word count goal," and it'd be a true statement :P Sat, 05 Nov 2011 14:47:42 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500626 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_500626 RothsChild So, our party is sitting down to eat at a diner, when Cackles, the Clown with attitude, inadvertently says some things that rub the others in the restaurant the wrong way. They get up, only to be surrounded and things get tense. “Anyone ever tell you?” He kept looking, raising his head to see over the crowd. “Tell me what!?” “Clowns ain't funny.” Cackles lowered his head and clenched his fists. At first I couldn't make out how these words affected him, but when he began raising his head back up I saw the brewing lava in his twitching eyes. Several families of veins protruded from his forehead and neck, pulsating like the magnet in a speaker playing speed metal music. His head snapped back when his head was halfway up. His eyes shot open, still twitching, giving the appearance that he was trying to force them from his socket purely by the power of his will. Hojo intently watched for his next move. With pauses between each word, and desperately trying to keep from exploding, he spoke, “Anyone ever tell you... not to f***... with a CLOWN!?” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 15:58:05 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_502660 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_502660 callmeIndigo [quote]The owner of the bookstore laughed. “Oh, it’s written all over you. Most people’s preferences are, if you know where to look. But the mysteries are over there, sweetie.” She pointed behind Rebecca, through a doorway marked by another brightly-coloured signpost. Rebecca began scanning the room beyond, then suddenly looked back at the signpost as something occurred to her. She frowned. “But the signs say that that room is all nonfiction.” “Of course they do, sweetie! They’re not supposed to tell you what’s really there. I keep them up for the ghosts. They get so set in their ways, the poor dears, they can’t quite understand that nothing is arranged how it used to be, so I make sure the rooms stay the way they were a hundred years ago on the spiritual plane. It’s the only way to avoid rumours of hauntings. You’ll get the hang of it, sweetie; you look like a smart girl.” And with that, the diminutive woman turned and walked off into another room, leaving Rebecca to stare after her for a few moments before shaking her head and making her way toward the mysteries.[/quote] I am in love with this exchange. It's one of the bits that I reread and think, "Wait, I wrote this?" in a good way. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 16:52:41 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_504225 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_504225 Universal Poseur Verity: "Yeah, well, this is Major Kusanagi to Ground Control, and that joke didn't make the grade the last dozen times and never will." Sat, 05 Nov 2011 17:18:58 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_504967 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_504967 jordan-leeann This is admittedly a bit overblown and takes a lot of liberties with the way people actually talk in real life, but I irrationally love it anyway. To give a bit of context, someone has just asked a police officer what it's like to deliver the news to parents that their kid has been killed in a car crash, and this is what he responds with. “It always is.” His voice was low and rough like the crunching of gravel underfoot. “Watching those parents, seeing what goes across their faces…there isn’t anything like it, and thank God there isn’t. They try hard to find a way for you to be wrong. You can see the denial written all over their faces. They want to think that you’re misinformed, you’ve got the wrong kid, that whoever’s dead must be someone else because it can’t be their child. They want to be the ones comforting someone else who’s lost their kid, so that when they’re done with that they can go home and hug their own son or daughter, and tell them how much they love them and make them swear never to do anything stupid like drive a Prius on an icy winding road. All the things they haven’t gotten around to doing yet because they figure there’ll always be time for that later. But it always hits them eventually that the only mistake made here was theirs, in thinking that we were wrong. And then it hits them that they can’t hug their kid, or say I love you, or tell them they aren’t invincible, because their kid’s already learned that lesson the hard way.” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 17:36:18 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_505467 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_505467 jordan-leeann I really hope the fact that there's a "publisher's excerpt" on your profile means that this is for sure going to be published. Because I would absolutely LOVE to read this novel. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 17:47:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_505710 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_505710 smashbro “But this is the best house for it. Face it; your house is irresistibly flammable!” Sat, 05 Nov 2011 18:29:10 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_506973 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_506973 alittlecrucio “Well, you met her. The girl is a walking fear factory. Not a lot of people have enough guts to actually go through with it, let alone someone who had to squeegee a fruit rollup before eating it.” Jessica shrugged. I love Jessica and her snark, she isn't my mc, but i need to give her more scenes. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 18:41:04 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507324 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507324 MynaOphelia I love that line, it's so quirky and original :D Sat, 05 Nov 2011 18:55:37 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_507757 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=3#forum_thread_comment_507757 MynaOphelia That one made me laugh. xD Sat, 05 Nov 2011 18:56:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507773 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507773 MynaOphelia That's a pretty clever way of describing another char xD Sat, 05 Nov 2011 18:57:03 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_507800 ohdeir "I didn’t eat lunch today. I just walked outside, tilted my head back, and looked up at the impossibly blue sky through frames of steel and glass. It made me feel important and insignificant at the same time. I’m trying to figure out how that could be." -pg 72 "We ran down the block, as though we were fleeing something. Well, we were fleeing responsibility, adulthood, expectations. We crashed through each other at the curb, nearly melted into the asphalt as we kissed at the corner. We were everlasting as traffic rushed by. Maybe others see us and think we’re foolish. Or maybe they look at us and see young, stupid love, the kind that may fizzle out tomorrow or last as long as the sun shines. I want to last into infinity, Gretchen. I want our love to be mapped out in the stars." -pg 56 Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:07:17 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_508097 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_508097 alittlecrucio Thank you! :) Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:35:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_508916 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_508916 candycornisdelicious Welp, this passage just turned this cynic into a blubbering fool :) Gah, sometimes I'm a sucker for cute things, that one certainly won. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:36:47 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_508964 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_508964 candycornisdelicious So a random character popped in my story during Write or Die to cause problems for my heroes. Here's some of the things he's said (that I've actually enjoyed). [quote]"Anyway, I was going to hang out with you guys, play some poker hitch a ride down to California, then commandeer your vessel and take you all hostage, but I guess this works too." Suddenly, he pulled out a sharp knife and pointed it at the person nearest to him, which happened to be Ophelia. She dropped her poker cards with a gasp. "I had two aces, okay! You win, you win!" she said in a panicked voice. "Oh, shut up. I'm taking this vehicle and all of you with it." Ace stepped forward. "Unhand the girl, you fiend! And get off of our trailer and out of our plot!"[/quote] Breaking the fourth wall too, wow! Also, did I mention his name is Ninja Tiger? Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:42:54 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509141 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509141 thatrandomwriter I might have a couple... "Parker was hidden behind a shelf, uncomfortably close to the wall and a porcelain figure with the most horrified and horrifying expression the boy had ever seen. This room was meant to be a storage room. It was ideal as a storage room. It was needed as a storage room considering the veritable mountains of used goods the antique shop was currently trying to sell, but Mr. Sevetter decided that it would be put to better use as a meeting place for his more unusual guests, and so here they were." Then, of course, there is the way one of my characters introduces herself to Parker... "'Hi, I'm Alice, and I like breaking people's things when I get angry at them!'" (It should be noted that this introduction takes place shortly after Alice drives her ex-boyfriend's motorcycle through the front door of the antique shop. I am going to have lots of fun with Alice.) Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:44:34 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509187 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509187 OceanWater "I wish I could still remember a time when we believed that all love needed was love." Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:45:02 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509199 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509199 Cydnorg This one's okay, I just wrote it. "Realizing he had won, he flipped me over and twisted my arms behind my back, then held them like that as he dragged me up and towards the basement door. He held on to my wrists unnecessarily tight, but I didn’t squirm. I felt bruised and battered enough. I followed his leading sharp tug down the peach coated stairs, back to the leash and the hook on the wall. I allowed him to imprison me and let me ponder my situation once more in the cold corner made my own, with comfort just out of reach and hope to be deposited and forgotten about." Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:52:52 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509414 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509414 Cydnorg Both of these are absolutely beautiful. I bet your novel is just as brilliant through and through. I'd love to read this! Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:54:32 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509452 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509452 Cydnorg This is brilliant. I pictured the dialog and the man who said it. Wow. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 19:56:05 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509490 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_509490 nyroeon "It had been a month since my parents' funeral. My life was returning to a practiced kind of normal, albeit slowly." I usually inject my stories with much humor, but this one has been SO bland so far, so this is the best line I can come up with. :( Sat, 05 Nov 2011 21:04:01 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_511450 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_511450 Telcontar I have a few decent ones from this year (like, when describing how my main characters, Muses, tell stories, I use the phrase "words worth a thousand pictures." That's probably my favorite so far). But just before November, I started rereading my NaNo 2010, and found that there were actually a LOT of quotes and phrases I liked... I made whole document of them! Most of them are too related to the plot to make sense out of context (i.e., when Lucas calls his meetings with Alan "a weekly event that I endured once every 77 days.") but I have always really liked it when Tasha mentions "all the infinite possibilities of the possibly infinite universes." Sat, 05 Nov 2011 21:53:09 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_512645 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_512645 Kikariki I just love this one. What is a writer if not the teller of other’s stories? Sat, 05 Nov 2011 22:27:53 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513430 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513430 Shinkoryu14 “My name?” The man chuckled. “My name isn’t important. Years from now, if there is something you should remember about this night, I would rather it were my songs than my name. I am but the conduit for my art, I have no need for identity.” He rose, ruffling her hair gently. “If you must have a word to identify me, then you may call me The Minstrel. That should suffice.” I kinda like this quote where one of the MC characters explains his reasoning for never introducing himself by his given name; it's actually a quirk that he is never called by a real name in the story due to his artistic eccentricities. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 22:33:47 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513548 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513548 Obscurite_Asile Some students enjoyed his lessons and saw him as the best teacher in the whole school. Others saw him as a complete twat that had to grow up. A good way to introduce my character. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 22:53:11 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513967 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_513967 tchaikovsky That awkward moment when your own story makes you cry: [quote]Not until the doors were fully shut did the King let down the mental walls he had placed around him. Merlin was in such a shock when a earsplitting grin broke out onto the King’s face, and the King rushed forward to envelope Merlin into a bonecrushing hug. “Merlin,” said the King, almost in a sob. “It has been years since you’ve last appeared with the Doctor. I was growing afraid I would never see you again. I thought—I had hoped—I’m sorry about our last conversation. I hope you can forgive me. I—I never met too—Oh, Merlin.” Merlin wanted to like to the hug. He did. But while this man was sighing into the crook of his neck as if he had several occasions before, to Merlin he was nothing more than a stranger. When the man had ceased speaking and instead hung onto Merlin, Merlin began to extract himself from the embrace, not meeting the man’s hurtful gaze when the man’s arms slipped away from Merlin’s shoulders and down to the man’s side. The King’s blue eyes looked so sad. “Merlin, what is the matter?” Looking anywhere but at the King, Merlin said, “I’m sorry, but I’ve never met you before once in my life. And my name is Remy. People seem to be confusing me for someone called Merlin. I’m sorry about the mistake.” “Your—your name is Remy?” said the King in a squeak. “Arthur,” called one of the men from the table. The men had risen and were walking over. Their faces were too sympathetic. Merlin did not understand. The King did not pay them any heed. “Doctor,” said the King, jerking his eyes toward the Doctor. “Doctor, I do not understand. Why doesn’t Merlin know me? Why doesn’t he know his name? Doesn’t he—” Suddenly the King fell very silent. Merlin looked away from the floor, and on the King’s face, he could see walls beginning to be built behind those sad blue eyes. “I’m sorry, Arthur,” said the Doctor, sounding truly apologetic, “but this is the first time we’ve met you, it seems.” [/quote] why am I messing with my OTP why why why i can't take this my heaaaaaaart Sat, 05 Nov 2011 23:02:14 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_514140 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_514140 quilled "Not as bad as I thought it'd be. Already did the two-a-days over the summer and all that so it was just a normal practice. Let us out early 'cause it's the first day and all." He continues to talk, but I zone out somewhere between making passes and planning out plays with the team. This conversation is so mundane that I'm tempted with the idea to go into the bathroom to see if I can rig myself a noose with tampon strings from the dispenser. Sat, 05 Nov 2011 23:17:19 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_514418 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_514418 Sforzie I was completely distracted by your Maple Story avatar... I've been trying to get my old F/P Mage to 120 and NaNo is getting in the way... Erm, on topic. It's not quite a quote, but I'm fond of the image: "For a moment, the fire god felt completely helpless. When the death god moved against him, it was like an avalanche being used to douse a campfire. " Sun, 06 Nov 2011 01:55:10 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516379 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_516379 ChoKiba <em>It was the world that we lived in. It was a gilded cage that we had built for ourselves out of dead bones that were growing brittle with each new one that we added to increase our holdings.</em> <em>As the king's caged beauty, she had the right to live forever, but the king had fallen along with all of his princes and nobles who had ever once touched the gilded cage that had been erected around the monarchs of France.</em> <em>I could not simply scratch away the gold paint and be content with the iron beneath.</em> Writing in first person is fun for reasons like that. And running metaphors are fun too because they help produce lines lie that as well. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 01:05:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_516469 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_516469 Mnemophage "As our imagination is limitless, so too are our capabilities." The Judge seems to get the most quotable lines. Comes with being Buddhist, I think. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 02:00:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517011 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517011 AdeusGoldsun "The coalescence of the structure was beautiful. Studying it for hours would leave you where you had begun. The truth is nothing more than a feeling proved true." -DBI This was how I ended up describing the structure of a strange and beautiful relationship between two of my characters. Describing the tale of the bumps and sudden turns they had gone through was too stretched out and seemed boring. So I have been working on my brevity in situations like these. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 02:24:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517221 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517221 Azzandra [quote] Oghren Tyrismel ripped the newspaper apart, shredding the pages over and over, then threw the pieces over the breakfast table like confetti. “That villain! I'll shred him to pieces, too!” the old man growled. His two apprentices continued eating their breakfast unfazed. This was not Tyrismel's worst display of anger they'd ever witnessed, and considering it wasn't aimed at them, they were not overly concerned about it. Lukara daintily sipped her tea, while Samraven picked out the paper that had fallen into his bowl and continued eating his oatmeal. [/quote] This is how my novel begins. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 03:02:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517562 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_517562 rainstorm. "We are the biggest idiots in the known universe!" "Maybe the unknown universe, too," said Cece. "But what exactly are you referring to?" Sun, 06 Nov 2011 05:04:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_518894 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_518894 rocknrolljunkie989 Mine so far: "Everybody's got their secrets. They make sense of the fucked-up habits that people have. You'll probably find out ours sooner or later. Then you'll understand us a little better." and "That's why I don't want to be a parent. I couldn't imagine having all that responsibility, y'know? Being able to have a life in your hands that's completely yours to mold into whatever shape you want it to be. It's terrifying." He looked out the window thoughtfully. "That, and I fuckin' hate kids." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 05:48:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_519602 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_519602 jordan-leeann That's beautiful. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 10:30:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_525244 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_525244 jordan-leeann :) Thank you! Sun, 06 Nov 2011 11:03:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_526089 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=6#forum_thread_comment_526089 HannaGrace "Her pale fair skin void of freckles, it looked so thin, I could almost see through her, see the tender places where she hurt, see the places underneath where there was room for caring, room for something almost like love, almost like acceptance." This spat itself out in the middle of a more physical scene. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 11:28:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_526759 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_526759 Caramella Barlow Icy; there was no other way to describe the chapped hands, the frozen body, the stunningly clear thinking, the dainty feeling inside him that bordered on reckless. David said, “You know what? I will check the calculations. But first, stay here while I go find a book to chuck at your head. WE DO NOT HAVE THE TIME!” Emily said, “Maybe… maybe we’re fighting the wrong enemy.” Sun, 06 Nov 2011 11:44:36 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_527219 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_527219 JStipe14 I developed a wicked headache behind my right eye that made it feel like some criminal mastermind and masochist had stabbed me with a black ball- point pen and was going to skewer my parietal lobe, temporal lobe, and my optic nerve as slowly and painfully as possible. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 12:17:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_528110 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_528110 Universal Poseur Marius: "You know, I once read the most fascinating essay comparing Princess Ozma to Saparmyrat Niyazov." John: "To begin with, they were both raised as boys." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:08:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_529546 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_529546 Supermatz hahahahah i love this topic!!! I have no ideas what to share with u guys but thanks so much this rtopic always cracks me up, i even lolled at your quore univesal poseur xD this is not good but random. i like having characters with random thought although im not too good at ggetting them across on paper... "We all think we are here for a reason, don’t we? This is probably good for the survival of our species. If we all thought we wouldn’t be special, we would just end up committing suicide. Everybody. Jumping in front of trains, taking loads of pills, drowning ourselves in the bathtub, jumping off the Eifel tower. All human beings. Killing themselves. That would make such a mess" Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:54:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530826 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530826 Supermatz geez i make so many spelling mistakes.. sorry guys.. i swear im not stupid.. ive just been writing too much today im exhausted! keep up the good work, good luck with your novels everyone! Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:57:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530922 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530922 Gracefully Awesome quotes everyone! My favorite line so far - I wrote it after a quick backtrack/drastic plot change. "Stinging cold tingles across spindly pine needles, sending shivers down the spines of the towering evergreens." And, about a hundred words later... "Morning does not break; she builds." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 13:58:10 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530937 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_530937 KedaseDerragar "Located as it was in an older part of the city, the mansions along Briar Street were as reserved as mansions can be, with relatively compact footprints, three floors at the most, and a notable lack of turrets." I think this is my favorite thing I've ever written. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 15:36:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_533613 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_533613 mjthinkpink I often play a game with the world. It’s a game I only know about though, so I think that makes me a cheater, or everyone else a liar. The game is: the minute they find out you’re unhappy, you lose. I lost, but the world cheated. Or I didn’t play right. “Thanks for having more clevage than brain cells." “Just because you do a lot of drugs doesn’t mean you’re fucking Bob Marley.” I like a lot of my MC's thoughts, but some of them are a little confusing, even to me xD Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:29:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_534987 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_534987 Britterscotch "So there he was, Taddeo, the man of the hour, unbeknownst to him: The aristocrats who flooded the banks of the lake picnic party were all excited to hear what news he had brought back from court, but he hadn't thought to bring any, the poor man." Word-padding aside....I'm completely in love with this. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:30:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_535022 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_535022 GallifreyGirl “Of course I'll believe you,” I said. “I've seen enough crazy things this week to convince me that anything is possible. Well, one crazy thing. And that was a swamp monster, which is practically multiple crazy things.” Sun, 06 Nov 2011 16:40:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_535311 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_535311 Zinerith "A murder a day keeps detectives astray" Alex said, grinning. Kicking her victims head into the corner. "Wait, what?" Mark exclaimed, "I thought you said you didn't like killing people!" "It's just something my dad told me when I was younger, that's all." She calmly walked over to the control panel and began to inspect it. Mark raised an eyebrow, at her. He wasn't going to ask. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:34:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_536802 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_536802 thomlina ''The girl being led on by Miss Yamagata was the one from her dreams. The one that she had thought she had imagined. But she hadn’t. No the beautiful girl was here, in pure flesh and blood. She was more scuffed up then from her dreams and she looked like she was about to collapse. But still as breathtaking as before. Then she saw something that broke her heart in two. A cool tear dripped slowly down her darkly toned cheek.'' I just really like this quote! Sun, 06 Nov 2011 17:54:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_537367 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_537367 TowerStanding "For a moment, she couldn’t find the motivation to move. Any move from here would only be another step into the dragon’s den. She used to fantasize about dueling dragons. She hoisted herself to her feet." I like this more than I ought to. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 18:10:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_537818 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=7#forum_thread_comment_537818 tsukkuyomi_kokuryuu Not sure how good it is but this is from a conversation between a woman named Mrs. Mitsui and my main character Tsukkuyomi: A voice cut into her thoughts though and she winced a bit before opening an eye to see it was the stern woman, still looking at her with disgust. Tsukkuyomi hid her own quite well, “What?” “Ha, how rude,” the woman said snobbishly, “I said, what is a young lady doing with something like that? Don’t tell me there’s a real sword inside.” “No, I keep a broom in here,” she said with just a tinge of sarcasm, “I like carrying it with me everywhere I go in case I meet a witch missing hers. You seem to fit the bill; want it?” (The last part is my favorite, one of the few times Tsukkuyomi actually uses noticeable sarcasm on someone in the story XD) Sun, 06 Nov 2011 19:53:03 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_540576 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_540576 R_C_LandPsMommy05 “Since when did looking like your father make you him?” The "fortune teller" when Caden asks her a question about his father. Sun, 06 Nov 2011 20:40:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_541677 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_541677 morrodin She abruptly reached up and shoved her hair aside to reveal the pointed tips of her ears. “This.” She pointed at her eyes, unnaturally blue, something a 12 year old would have been quick to notice when comparing with her peers. “This.” She opened her mouth wide, and pointed at her sharper than normal canine teeth. “This.” She glared at him, as if daring him to deny her next words. “I’m a freak.” Sun, 06 Nov 2011 21:46:57 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_543226 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_543226 booboobear She scanned the sheepy man. If this guy was what lawyering was all about, she was outtie five thousand. okay, so this is really tired early morning writing..... but points for you if you can pick the quote from a tv character who said 'outtie five thousand'..... Sun, 06 Nov 2011 22:40:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544115 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544115 Kate L "...So, they know what to expect of me and I of them. We know the dance steps already, and we're the ones stepping on your toes. We're getting upset at you for standing still in the middle of our carefully coordinated waltz." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 22:51:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544251 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544251 LadySerendip This made me giggle while I was writing it. It's a conversation between my MC, who works at the front desk in a college dormitory, and her friend Sascha, who is a Residential Advisor in the same dorm building (naughty language censored, just in case): "What's going on?" I asked. "One of the little idiots on my floor decided that it would be a good idea to sneak a bottle of vodka into his room." "Sad. It's only the first week. Usually they don't get desperate until at least midterms," I said. Sascha coughed out a short laugh, and I asked, "But how'd you find out? I know you're not the type to go prowling in people's rooms." "F***er dropped his bag in the hallway. The bottle shattered, and now everything smells like a cheap Russian whore up there. So I have to report him." Sun, 06 Nov 2011 23:15:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544491 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_544491 Timpeni Aaron sighed. “Physical hurt isn’t the worst she can do. Oh, no. Her forte is being so damn unbearable. She’s always looking for any opportunity to make fun of me. For example, once I revealed that I was gay, she used the ‘Gay men like sex too much’ stereotype. When I return home from grocery shopping, she goes ‘Did you sleep with the manager, Aaron? Did you sleep with the clerk, Aaron? Did you sleep with the bread, Aaron?’ HEY, DON’T LAUGH, I’M BEING SERIOUS!” Allison restrained her bout of laughter. “Well, I don’t blame you! The bread is sexy!” “Shut your sarcastic mouth,” Aaron hissed. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 00:12:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_545082 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_545082 The Noise In Space "Growing up has nothing to do with months or years. You think someone can turn from a baby into a child, or a child into an adult simply by waiting? How big or how grown up you are has much more to do with you as a person than the number of breaths you take." Mon, 07 Nov 2011 04:13:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547218 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547218 Sciolet ^Like. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 04:38:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547467 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547467 hknamida This one became my favourite after another thread made me realise that it's a haiku: Her lips formed a word, but her voice seemed suddenly too faint to be heard. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 04:57:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547684 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_547684 doseyclwn Wrote this in the wee hours of t he morning... "What?!? What are you all staring at? Haven't you ever seen a chicken before? Fuck!" Mon, 07 Nov 2011 05:17:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_547909 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_547909 dt93 It's also the last line/paragraph I wrote, but I thought it was fairly nice, haha. It describes the social interplay in my dystopian/SF novel pretty well. "Alliances here run like an imperceptible webwork of strings, and if one is snapped, who knows what its writhing corpse will tug at or latch on to. No one here has any illusions about breaking the cycle: it’s better to be poor and alive than poor and the alternative." Mon, 07 Nov 2011 05:52:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_548326 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_548326 CanvasNoMachi My favorite so far would have to be: "...enveloping her in its austere cocoon. So longingly does she stare at the fragments of sky visible through the stilled leaves... Basking in the pale limelight, her milky white skin radiates ever so brightly, pristine aura mingling with the blanket of rays. Her fragile arms are raised as such. Filtering through the spaces between her fingers, they cast its shadow upon her visage. Palms upward and turning them ever so slightly, she allows the light to refract, lazily arcing around her small hands. Her lips of alabaster form a slight smile, curving at the pristine ecstasy of the moment. Illuminated in the pale sunlight, glimmering dust dances across her frame, swirling about as if calling to her. They might be enticing her to join them in their choreographed performance of nature’s touch. Her crimson eyes gaze lovingly at the effect. Passion is kindled in them, flames of joy flickering about in steps matched to the alluring dance. They move in perfected harmony to a secret tune. Her vessel the chariot and her crimson eyes the columns of inferno, she might rise to the heavens, following the path laid by the fine streams of light." OR "Withdrawing her hands shyly, she looks away. The effect is so instantaneous. It is as if she is a blossom lost to misery, bleeding out the happiness. As if a withering spell were cast upon her, the light fades to a pinprick of a needle before disappearing. With it departs the angelic bliss, fading like the sunshine, as the shadows of the forest fall across her. The dreary transformation complete, she..." Mon, 07 Nov 2011 12:40:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_555461 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_555461 G.B. Walker Really? That's cool, I think. Obviously I am stuck in the 20th century. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:21:58 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_556505 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_556505 littlewisp "I swear by the Elden I will drag you by your rutting hair to Perce if you do that again. You want me to not touch you? Don't touch me!" This is after my FMC who is remembering how to interact with people kicked my MMC in the crotch because he wouldn't stop laughing at her, and it seemed the most effective way to shut him up. That, and a little of the follow up later: A rebellious shrug was her only reply. He sighed, and gingerly touched his scalp. "Hump it, my head is bleeding. Did you have to yank out half my hair?" Diampha smiled viciously down at her newly hairy palms. Rax breathed funny for a short span, and unclenched his jaw. "Right then. We were discussing the Elden. What do you know?" Mon, 07 Nov 2011 13:54:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_557392 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_557392 LordMoogi Here, my narrator takes a moment to justify himself to his audience: '“Oh my God, do you ever stop monologuing?” I shouted. Look, it had been a long night, and getting these Hannibal Lectures from a two-bit fantasy villain who wanted to be God when he grew up was really starting to grate on my fluffy little nerves. I feel fully justified in this. I mean, sweet zombie Jesus on a pogo stick, people, this psychotic bastard just needed to shut the hell up. I might have been a little on edge here.' Another scene, wherein we learn how difficult it is to be a character in an unwritten novel: '“Never mind,” Lance mumbled. “Just forget about-“ He was interrupted when Shackleton kicked him quite forcibly from under the table. “What in the hells did you do that for?” After a moment’s pause, Lance continued. “If I wasn’t currently engaged in a brutal regimen of Intense Alcohol-Induced Forced Epiphany Therapy, I would kick your ass for that. I mean, I was- am- the greatest swordsman in all of Thaita. I’ve led armies and conquered fucking gods, man.” His face fell. “Or I would have. I don’t know how I’m supposed to. Fuck, I’m supposed to be a godsdamn genius!” He grabbed his beer and started chugging it down, all while shouting, “Why can’t I be smart?” This led to no small amount of choking, and it frankly escalated the whole scene beyond tragedy and into pure farce. I didn’t laugh, though. Really. No one can prove that I did. Even if I thought it was hilarious.' Mon, 07 Nov 2011 14:36:48 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_558452 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_558452 Kaylyn "It's magic. Magic isn't real." He held her gaze, making sure she could see his face very clearly. The next words came, not from his mouth, but from his mind directly into hers. "Isn't it?" Mon, 07 Nov 2011 15:07:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_559185 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_559185 Supermatz Nice profile picture. Sorry for the lame comment =P I think your quotes are amazing, I keep coming here to find funny ones but some are actually really deep and clever and stuff. Now I can't sleep. You guysssss. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 16:36:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_585872 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_585872 Trisha Myers "Up and down disengaged as he tried to stand. He ended up belly down on the opposite side of the tree." I wouldn't call it amazing, but it makes me smile. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 19:34:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_589612 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_589612 CoriSeaSinger I added this as my excerpt because it makes me happy: “Why didn’t you save him?” Marvel knew that a human would be mad at this point, but she couldn’t afford anger. She was not going to be angry. “I’ve seen the future, remember? I’m trying to save everyone, not just you and your boyfriend.” “He was my partner.” Never mind, the anger was there. He saw it, too. “Shouldn’t you be controlling your temper? You’d hate to snap, wouldn’t you?” Marvel stared at him, her eyes fiery with desire, mouth hungry for blood, fingers itching for the feeling of flesh tearing and muscle shredding…she thought of the everyday fight for control and the pain, ripping and fresh, that she still felt whenever she thought of her partner being pulled away from her. “I really wouldn’t. Would anyone regret your death?” “Yes. Marvel, this is for the entire world.” “The world needs me to be a zombie?” “Yes.” Marvel groaned and grabbed him roughly. “I needed him!” “I’m sorry.” Marvel contemplated his apology, then leaned closer and breathed into his ear. “Can you see your future, you manipulative bastard?” He shuddered slightly, but his voice was calm and sad. “Yes.” “Me too.” Marvel ate him alive. She savored every crunch of bone and every shriek of pain. She made a leisurely meal of his intestines. While he lay there dying, Infected, she stood up, licked her fingers primly, and walked out the door. “Die of hunger and pain and desire. I’ll go save your precious world, and you will want nothing but its destruction.” Marvel then locked him in and left. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 21:11:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_591561 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_591561 Supermatz “Look at Svennsson”, he said, “looks like he made a new friend!” “Or enemy”, said Irene. Frenemy. The Finish guy that was sitting right in front of Sven had started with the anti-Swede jokes, apparently. They really were silly, such as “How do you sink a Swedish submarine? You knock on the door!” gosh. “We are not inviting him over to our place!” he mouthed at Lukas. Lukas seemed too high on whisky and happiness and life in general to notice. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 16:15:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607176 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607176 Lollia-Sicana “For a lady you have a filthy mouth.” “But that doesn’t affect it’s ability to speak the truth.” Wed, 09 Nov 2011 16:29:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607476 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607476 urbadave Honey, PTSD isn't a disease that you catch. It's more like a dislocated shoulder: if you just pop it back in and nothing else, it will stay weak and pop back out again. It needs painful therapy to really heal. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 16:35:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607608 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_607608 Alona Mitsnefes “Did that noisy maid say Uncle Oliver’s here?” asked Viola. “That’s right,” said Eva. “And don’t say unkind things about the maids.” “Not even if they’re true?” “Unfortunately, Viola, truth is a far smaller component of civil conversation than you’ve been led to believe.” “Does that mean civil conversation is evil?” “Go back to Shakespeare. We’ll talk about it when you’re older.” Wed, 09 Nov 2011 17:53:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_609102 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_609102 WileJ Just noticed some interplay between a couple of scenes: Nigel said to Penelope, 'Too bad Simon didn't come. He'd have slugged the ambassador and been thrown in jail by now.' By the time [Colonel John and Lord Bertrand] arrived back inside, a ruckus had broken out in the middle of the dancing. Lord Bertrand sighed then waded through the crowd. As he suspected, Eliza was a the center. He was not harsh when he whispered, 'we'll discuss this at home' in her ear as he led her away. Secretly he wanted to applaud his daughter. Given all the undue stress she was under, it was almost a miracle she had not slapped the ambassador earlier in the evening. In the morning the Spanish ambassador was sure to have a black eye he would remember. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 18:38:47 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_609991 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=8#forum_thread_comment_609991 I_Just_Want_To_Fly I don’t know how long I was out, but there were cup noodles when I woke. I groaned, sitting up and zombiewalking towards the smell. I located the cup, somehow managed to obtain a fork, and began shoveling noodles into my mouth, barely noticing I was holding the wrong end of the fork. Wed, 09 Nov 2011 19:58:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_611462 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_611462 Deps Me too! Wed, 09 Nov 2011 20:09:21 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_611692 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=5#forum_thread_comment_611692 Piper the Perfect "A few can scare you, a few more can kill you." Two thousand maybe four thousand? I can't remember, but four thousands words later and it's still my favorite single line. Thu, 10 Nov 2011 05:13:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_617084 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_617084 R_C_LandPsMommy05 They are more like excerpts, but whatever. I wrote these on my iPhone today, then pasted them over because I thought they were so awesome and I could make them fit into my story: Number 1: I see ghosts—well, Souls,” I told Scarlett, “and you see, well I am tired of seeing them. I don’t want to help them. I want to be a regular kid. It’s not like I’m trying to be mean, uh, Scarlett, but I’m just wanting to fit in.” I watched her face anxiously. I wondered what she thought of me now. Was I a coward for wanting to be normal instead of wanting to be a hero? “That’s why I think you can help me,” she said. “If you help me, maybe I’ll have hope. And then you won’t have to help anyone anymore.” “Promise?” I asked. “I Promise,” said Scarlett. She was looking prettier than ever. I couldn’t say no. “Deal.” I said and we shook on it. Number 2: “Caden, you need to quit thinking about what they want. What do you want? Do you want to keep on helping them? Go for it. Do you want to quit? Go for it. Just choose something! You can’t wait around all the time just thinking about what other people want you to do or ‘Would Mom be happy if I did this?’ Go with what you think and see how it turns out.” “b-buttttttt,” I sputtered. “But nothing. Just do it. “You’re bossy. “I know,” said Charley, “and you need to get more bossy. Tell Scarlett whatever you feel like and then do whatever you want with her and everyone else. Just do it.” She gave me a little push in the direction of Scarlett’s bathroom. Scarlett, you think you are the only person hurting around here? You think you are the only one who's ever thought about that stuff? Huh? Well, you aren't. You're bot alone and you need to stop acting so sorry for yourselfbecause you aren't the only obe and you are great. I know you dant just snap out of it, nobody can, but at least try! Try, Scar! Try to live, I cried. Number 3: Scarlett, I said desperately, "I love you. I loved uoo when I first saw you and I think you're beautiful. I know its sap and whatever, but I want to keep seeing you and I want to see the real you, not just a semi-Soul. You and I want to kiss you and I want to Hang out with you and I want to introduce you to my sister and my cousins and...Scar?" the machine beeped faster. Scarlett!" her eyes opened slowly. "Your back." okay, now I was kind of embarrassed I'd shared all of that stuff. Oh well. Maybe she didn't hear. Thu, 10 Nov 2011 22:09:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633914 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633914 R_C_LandPsMommy05 I need to spell check, I guess ^^ Thu, 10 Nov 2011 22:09:58 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633921 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633921 R_C_LandPsMommy05 Oh, and sorry, but number three has a bit of a spoiler in it...Dang, I can't erase it! :( Thu, 10 Nov 2011 22:11:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633937 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_633937 Dhalilhia "I can't believe you're able to live in such a scruffy rathole, Joshua." "At least, this rathole has a bed." "Bed are such overrated pieces of forniture, my dear brother." ---- "So you said you'll let his dead wife live again?" "Exactly." "And what will you do when he'll discover you can't really do it?" "Dunno. Maybe I'll kill him." "I thought you liked him." "I do. I really like him, he almost treats me like a normal person. For this, I think I'll keep his corpse." Fri, 11 Nov 2011 14:25:54 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_645718 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_645718 I_Just_Want_To_Fly Okay, I'm sorry. I JUST NEED TO POST MY QUOTE!!! So, Delanie overheard Helena telling Sphinx about time paradoxes and whatnot, and part of it was how she wasn't supposed to exist. Being a morpher, she morphs into something with electricity powers and tries to electrocute Helena with bolts of lightning, but in the panic, Helena, unknowing of her own power, telikinetically slams Delanie into the wall, killing her. She doesn't know what it is- yet. Delanie was collapsed by the wall, the back of her head bleeding from some incredible force. Her eyes were rolled back into her head. Her face was still half-adjusted from bloodlust to shock, in the sudden transition from shooting lightning to nearly dying. Something had slammed her into the wall. Suddenly I had an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. I was in my room, back at the Facility. Standing in front of me was Tintin, holding my iPod. I was yelling at him to give it back, when all of the sudden it just zoomed into my hand. Oh, god, it couldn’t be. ***LATER She goes down to get help. When she comes back, here's what happens. I felt her pulse, the adrenaline in my veins causing my own to skyrocket. I felt lightheaded and dizzy from fear, but I had to continue. I had to know. Where there should have been a pulse there was nothing. Her hand was still hot from the lightning, and her eyes, though rolled up, still held a sort of craziness. Though there was no life in them, there was energy, an energy so difficult to harness and control that when used for the first time... “Oh, Delanie,” I whispered, resting her hand on my forehead, feeling its warmth. The warmth of a life that had been taken so young. That I had taken so young. I had just killed Delanie Monroe, my second and best friend in a universe of enemies. Sat, 12 Nov 2011 19:32:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_668500 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_668500 SetsunaSakamoto This bit is from one of my married couples. The wife is 5'0" and the husband is somewhere around 6'6". “It really isn’t fair that you’re so much taller than me,” she pouted. “I don’t mind,” he teased. “After all, you’re the prime height for cleaning the underside of chairs.” Sun, 13 Nov 2011 18:43:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_684118 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_684118 Echokind "Holy. Crap. This guy was such a talker. Manners were probably a big aspect of the jack shit he forgot from his childhood. Learning to shut the hell up probably was, too." ...As one of my MC's mental responses to a talkative guy she just met. I just wrote this down a bit ago, and it amused me. ^^ Sun, 13 Nov 2011 20:27:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686040 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686040 Sarah Stardust This is more of a metaphor, but I just love it to bits "I think I’m like a tree in the rainforest, the ones wrapped in those vines. Sometimes tress get covered by these thick, interwoven vines called strangler vines. They’re called strangler vines because, well, that’s what they do. They grower bigger and bigger, and higher and higher up, and weave tighter and tighter around the tree, until all the water and nutrients that should be nourishing the tree are instead feeding these vines. And slowly but surely, the tree just dies. But even when it shrivels up, or falls over, or whatever is does exactly, you can’t tell. Because the strangler vines are there, as healthy as ever, exactly the shape the tree was before it died. They smother the life right out of it. I think maybe all my pretending smothered the life right out of me. One mask built up on top of another mask, in these endless layers of choking, superficial, personalities, all building on top of my real one. And all my energy went into keeping the masks alive, and I forgot that I was in there somewhere too. I think that maybe Phoebe Ackerman is dead, and I’m just the shell of her body walking around, no identity, no spirit, just a beating heart, breathing lungs, growing cells and rushing blood. " Sun, 13 Nov 2011 21:15:04 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686886 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686886 tsukkuyomi_kokuryuu I just don't want to put this one in context because either way it's funny (to me at least X3): “Because he last saw her?” asked Kiyoshi. “No because the butler usually does it,” Seimei chimed in with a chuckle. Sun, 13 Nov 2011 21:17:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686927 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_686927 ceciliaMasimo “Arsenio is quite the character but don’t be fooled with his sleeping cat trick. Many people from away have made the mistake of taking him for a fool and he’s all but eaten them alive.” “Does he actually eat them?” Tomi asked him half-serious. “Not at all child, he doesn’t like the taste of fools.” Tomi’s question lingered in the night air. And so what if that was true? I asked the sky. What would I do with that truth? As usual, the sky didn’t answer. -Two of my favourite quotes so far. The speaker in the first is Farris an uncle of my MMC. He makes me laugh whenever he's around. the Second is a musing from my FMC. Tomi seems to be everywhere in my writing =D Mon, 14 Nov 2011 09:07:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_692652 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_692652 Sunerun "I'm not used to this kind of thing," Nolan confided, "I'm a thinker, not a warrior." Caroline thought for a moment, then replied, "That's the best kind of warrior." Mon, 14 Nov 2011 10:16:27 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_693403 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_693403 Lokemele A listing of adult beverages created by my dry for too long Cretaceous colonists. The names of the contents were etched into the bottles themselves, or in the case of the jugs, fired on, and made for some interesting reading: Borisov’s Brain Killer, Joy Juice, Piss in Boots, Over the Moon, Soylent Green, Old Panther Piss (he was sure he’d seen that brand before somewhere, especially when he read the “Made in Montana by Panthers”), Potente Potion, Magic Jack, Nasty Shit, BNB’s Best, Home Made Hooch, and Mei’s Midnight Madness. Mon, 14 Nov 2011 10:20:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_693460 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_693460 english_petal "And then the screaming and magic happened." XD Mon, 14 Nov 2011 17:13:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_699819 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_699819 Quinzy The effects of the herb were insidious, causing those who breathed it in to become unconscious. Kicking open the carriage door, he tossed it outside carelessly, and said in a scornful tone, to nobody in particular, “Nice try, father.” Mon, 14 Nov 2011 17:42:14 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700203 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700203 A.Harper " My brain still felt like freeze-dried and freshly hammered feces, but I needed to get moving. " Mon, 14 Nov 2011 17:49:18 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700294 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700294 Russockshitha Even out of context this still makes me laugh. Where do I come up with this stuff? Anyway, here it is: "The toilet was also less magical, being only a pit that was dredged out every so often." Mon, 14 Nov 2011 18:00:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700453 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_700453 H Well, the absolute BEST piece of descriptive writing I've ever done came to me this year... Rain lashes the windows and roof with a violent but steady rhythm. Accompanying it is the shrill screech of the wind, powerful enough that it causes the house to creak along with it and the branches on the trees outside to crash together. The deep growl and rumble of the thunder provides a low sound underneath it. All together, it creates a dark, creepy kind of music. Like some sort of awful symphony orchestra is playing right outside the door. And then the best quote in the story to me (just to remind us it's a comedy story) is: "Can I come in? I just walked across town through your typical horror novel style dark and stormy night and I'm cold.” Mon, 14 Nov 2011 20:14:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_702756 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_702756 Solarstar Two personal favorites. It had begun. The attack of the spring break zombies. and the other one "Trust your coincidences" Tue, 15 Nov 2011 15:58:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_715749 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_715749 Ellyndia With this quote, I realised how I tied a few major images (a voice, darkness, acting versus waiting, etc) together. I also realised that my novel, despite all its bashing about religion, might end up being more positive than I hoped. --- There comes a time when you become aware of a presence in life. The power – the power not necessarily from above but from the outside – walks beside you. It is sometimes the only voice in the darkness. The voice can whisper in seductive tones to break the law, for instance. Or it can yell and push you to dive into murky cold waters to save someone. The voice that never leaves you can inspire courage, fear, sloth, gluttony – sin. Or the voice that never leaves you can inspire greatness, courage, compassion, generosity – virtue. The voice might change over the years but it is uniquely yours. The voice acts with great impetus and drive. It wants to be heard and acted upon. It speaks passionately, but only because it believes in its truth. Maturity, however, is not the mere recognition that there is a thing that speaks to you in your moments of doubt and pride. Maturity is practicing and acting to what one truly believes is right, despite what the voice might say. Maturity is defiance, but also acceptance. Maturity is practicing doubt but acting certain. Maturity is balance. We all have this voice. Tue, 15 Nov 2011 19:28:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_718259 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_718259 annafreakingmarie My two favorite lines so far, mostly because they're funny and sarcastic, moreso in the first one than the second: "...the bell rang overhead. I likened the sound to the final dying screams of the children being dragged unwillingly away from their summer vacation. Tragic." "I heard Trace mutter something under his breath that rhymed with “numb pass stitch”. If Mrs. Smythe heard him, she chose to ignore it." Tue, 15 Nov 2011 20:23:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_719272 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_719272 emberwing "Flint should have known it was going to be a bad day when his alarm clock took the form of his thin bedroom wall being knocked down." “You have the attention span of a goldfish with Alzheimer’s, you know that right?” “There is an old Earth saying, Captain,” Zach said. “A phrase of great power and wisdom and consolation to the soul in times of need.” “What’s that then?” said Mira skeptically. “AAAAAAAARG!” Zach screamed, charging forward and swinging his bat over his head. The sheer stupidity of this act caused the Deinonychus pack to pause, breaking formation as Zach charged through. (Doctor Who, get out of my novel) Tue, 15 Nov 2011 20:50:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_719705 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_719705 Yirggzmb "Knock knock!" she insisted. She took a step towards the nearest pirate, and he stumbled backwards. He glanced around at his companions, looking alarmed. "Who... who's there?" "NINJAS!" Chickik screamed the word, flapping her wings and her eyes suddenly glowing red. All around them shadowy figures popped into view. ---- I don't think I can explain this out of context. I'll just say that I've been working towards this ever since I thought of wonderfully insane use for my character who mostly just spews bad knock knock jokes. Tue, 15 Nov 2011 22:02:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_720696 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_720696 snowbug "What we need in these modern times is a man with a brain!" Min said. Then she looked thoughtful for a moment. "Preferably the brain should be inside their head and not kept in a glass jar. Just as a point of clarification." Wed, 16 Nov 2011 09:48:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_726175 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_726175 Tatooine92 I'm ripping this one from chapter three and sharing it here, because it includes the most ambiguous, subplot-inducing pronoun I've ever used, and I'm stoked. :3 <em>Those laughs made him think of his younger brother. God, how long had he been gone? Five years? Ten, maybe? It felt like an eternity sometimes.</em> Wed, 16 Nov 2011 11:20:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_727349 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_727349 Tatooine92 Haha! I love it! :D Wed, 16 Nov 2011 11:22:43 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_727384 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=9#forum_thread_comment_727384 numbing_gum Jayme laughed softly, before looking up. "Is it bad that I know wanting you is wrong, but yet I don't care." she told him, a small frown forming on her face.  "It's human," he replied, looking back down at the agent. "All anybody in this world wants is what is isn't right for them. We like pain because it makes us feel something, it makes the blood pump through our veins just that little bit faster... And we all just cant get enough of it." he explained, his eyes looked unfocused as he spoke but as soon as he finished speaking he looked back down to Jayme. Possibly one of my favourite lines that I've ever written. :) Wed, 16 Nov 2011 16:44:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_732198 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_732198 I_Just_Want_To_Fly I'm starting to love my MC. She's just brought her best friend back to life and this is her reaction: “Delanie!!” I shouted, hugging her. “You’re alive!!! CAPTAIN!!! PROFESSOR!!! WOLF!!! GET YOUR FAT OLD ASSES UP HERE BEFORE I KICK ‘EM BACK TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH!!!” Wed, 16 Nov 2011 20:11:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734892 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734892 I_Just_Want_To_Fly [quote=emberwing] “You have the attention span of a goldfish with Alzheimer’s, you know that right?” [/quote] Love that so much. xD Wed, 16 Nov 2011 20:13:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734927 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734927 I_Just_Want_To_Fly [quote=Ellyndia] It is sometimes the only voice in the darkness. [/quote] Beautiful. Wed, 16 Nov 2011 20:16:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734976 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_734976 Mowo64 “Alright, alright…” Spencer groaned in defeat. “Did you call to say anything helpful, then? Because so far, we’ve just been stumbling around in the dark since you got kidnapped. It’s going to take us forever just to find you—let alone rescue you.” Maidyne snorted. “Spencer, honestly, you’re exactly as dramatic as a whiney high school cheerleader..." This girl cracks me up so much. :) Oh, and one sweet one... “Oh, please…” Spencer sighed, looking away as he shoved his hands deeper in his pockets. “That was nothing but the fifth or sixth ‘Merry Christmas’ she’s heard today.” Maidyne sighed as well, smiling brightly as she gazed out into the falling snow. “But, who can say? That may very well be the first kind word she’s heard all month… perhaps she’ll think of it fondly as she sits beside the fire, watching the snow fall outside her window as she sips her coffee, and allow herself a gentle smile before heading back out to work…” Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:25:53 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747837 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747837 Pickwick12 Ha! Hahaha! Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:38:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747947 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747947 Pickwick12 "But The Woman was inside. Walls separated them, but not purpose. She had agreed, and Sherlock had seen the resolve twisted inside her anger. She would play her part, and she would play it well. She was no brother, but she was enough." Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:39:59 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747961 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747961 awesome-me94 This paragraph shows my MC in a truly vulnerable moment while she is being relentlessly stalked by a vampire: "She walked quickly, hoping no one was watching her but still unable to shake the almost violated feeling of being constantly stared at. It made her feel sick that no matter what, she'd never feel fully free. She was almost overcome with sickening fear and dread of going into her apartment. But she had no choice. Swallowing thickly, she fumbled with the doorknob and stumbled into the dark emptiness that was her apartment. She tried unsucessfully to slow her breathing as she stood there in the middle of the living room with the lights still off. Her knees were shaking and she was very close to breaking down into chest-wracking sobs. The phone rang again, reminding her of her innermost fears." Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:43:31 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747995 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_747995 A.Harper One of my mother's rules -She didn't have many, so they were easy to remember- was that it was an unforgivable sin to press fast-forward on The Beatles. Ignoring the Holy Writ of Lennon was a transgression equal to murder, rape, or holding a conversation during a movie. Thu, 17 Nov 2011 21:49:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750074 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750074 TeaLights Despite the fact that I'm not sure what she says at the beginning means what I want it to, I still really like the rest of this. “Come on. We should go bait ourselves better,” I stand, pulling myself from his hands and refusing to let him say any more. He tries to speak again but I turn and start to stride out of the room, “South! You're not in love with me, you were brainwashed when we thought we were the last two people on earth.” I turn when I get to the doorway, widen my eyes, raise my eyebrows and try to give a joking smirk. I force my teasing words to have a light, airy tone, “It's easy when there's only one choice, isn't there?” His smile fades and his eyes dull in disbelief, but I force a giggle and make sure to keep my face from growing dark until I am down the hall and I am sure he can't see me. It takes everything I have not to go back to him. Thu, 17 Nov 2011 23:08:42 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750604 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750604 TeaLights * Isn't it? ...not 'isn't there?' lol Thu, 17 Nov 2011 23:09:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750609 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750609 FireflyArtist “You know, Kenny from the show South Park actually holds the record for most deaths,” Callum replied, finishing his peppermint hot chocolate. (Not much, but I love it.) Thu, 17 Nov 2011 23:34:13 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750747 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_750747 Mowo64 This one made me laugh. :) I love it so much. Fri, 18 Nov 2011 07:04:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_753136 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_753136 elwrites Like this. Not sure why. Think I must have accidentally plagiarised something but have no idea what. "My limit was cash. If cash was involved, my conscience was wiped clean. Whoever paid me, the death was on them, not me. I was just the tool; I was the gun that fired, not the fat fingers that held it." Fri, 18 Nov 2011 07:20:41 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_753264 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_753264 awesome-me94 "Allison, breathe, you're okay!" Dylan tried to reassure her, but everything began to spin away, gaining distance and surrealism as time went by. Air was her enemy as a total freakout mode took over her mind. It was always just out of her reach. She sucked in a deep breath, but too late, because she was lost in dark shadows that lurked behind her eyelids, teasing her and taking on the shapes of her worst nightmares. Sat, 19 Nov 2011 18:39:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_773385 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_773385 Mowo64 "'...And, once you convinced yourself that this answer was the correct one, I’m sure you went through and came up with a plan to complete this little mission, and have the details ironed out to the usual ridiculous point that you know at what minute the doctor will walk back into the room and know exactly what he’s going to say to us.'” Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:09:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_786934 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_786934 Enna-Isilee These are a couple of my favorites: Miry was glad it was dark, because the thought of Jem's underwear produced vivid mental visuals that made her blush so brightly she could have lit a fire a foot away. This one's kind of long, but... : The door opened. Miry whirled around to see Isaac standing in the doorway. "I-I-sorry," he stammered, red-faced. Despite the apology, he didn't move. He gawked at Miry, who was clad in only a bra and underwear. She put her hands on her hips and faced him. "Have you gotten a long enough look?" she asked. "Get out, perv," Isi translated. Another face appeared in the doorway. "What's going on-" Jem's jaw dropped. His eyes grew so wide that they were in danger of falling right out of his head. "If I'm putting on a show, I ought to get paid," Miry said complained. Jem grabbed Isaac by the back of his shirt and dragged him away. "I wonder if he'll hit him," Isi said thoughtfully. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 19:59:37 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_787610 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_787610 Enna-Isilee *complained. Miry complained. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:00:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_787618 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_787618 Smackdreezy Mine is a conversation between my MC and her little friend. ---- "It's something you need to accept, Seeker. I won't be around forever, one day I WILL die." Her tone was far more fierce in her reiteration of the frightening point, the point that Seeker would not absorb, no matter how much she drilled it in. "Don't you think I know that?!" Seeker suddenly erupted, digging his nails into her flesh, but she didn't flinch of retaliate. "Of course you're going to die someday! I know that better than anyone! Why...why do you think I'm so afraid whenever you take on a search?! I hate it when you run off into battle like some kind of crazy person...you talk and act like dying is no big deal, but it is! It's a HUGE deal to me!" Ace pursed her lips, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she allowed the child to have his moment. But she could feel the heat rising in her gut, her heart pounding furiously and her fingers began to twitch. She wasn't sure how much longer she could take it. "But it's not even dying that scares me the most..." He paused, swallowing the painful lump in his throat, "What scares me is that...you think your life means so little, that you wouldn't mind dying!" Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:42:28 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_788128 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_788128 DarkCoffeeJazz “Cheer up, Jace!” Ross enthusiastically told him. “Before you know it, we'll be in Westcoast Haven, catching the next barge to Amra, city of the Om'Shan!” “O-whatty what?” Jace replied, blinking. “The elite battlemages he's been prattling on about for the better part of the day,” Conrad sharply replied. “And would you quiet down back there! I'll turn this sorry excuse for a wooden contraption around if I have to!” “He'll do it, too,” Aidan quietly added, his eyes glued to the pages of his book, but otherwise expressionless. Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:43:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_788139 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_788139 alphawolf144 (In description of a joke shop) The place smelled like bubblegum and bodily functions. Various paintings of expressive clowns hung on the red and yellow pinstriped walls. This, coupled with little Margarette Baldwin claiming that one of them was breathing towards her in ‘95, meant the majority of customers were boys. The kaleidoscope colors were washed out in the dim lighting. It was dizzying and electrifying, like the feeling one might get if they had actually reached the end of a rainbow. Tue, 22 Nov 2011 19:42:30 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_812365 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_812365 TwilightSparkle “Am I a horrible person for giving Colonel Oscar Boris Herbert Lisbon, Jr., up as man bait?” I ask him miserably. “No, you aren’t a horrible person. I was about to shove the man at them myself. Like I said before, he drinks all my beer.” Goodwin shrugs. It’s everyone’s very favorite red head who wants to kill you in your sleep with a thumbtack. Yep, Houston. "The only way you are going to get better is if you tear down those walls around your heart, babe. You put them up to keep others from breaking your heart, but if you don’t tear them down, you’ll break your own heart, and that’s even worse." She advises me. "Cyrus, it's not a free fall. It's a set of stairs that are steep. No matter how hard it is to descend them, there will always be solid ground to hold you up." Houston says. “Well I’m sick and TIRED of practicality! I want to be supported in what I’m doing with my life! Yes, okay? I slept with the enemy! I’m pregnant with his kid! But I’m not letting my mistakes keep me from letting someone else have a chance at life! I don’t want to be practical! Screw practicality, I’m having a frigging baby!” I yell at him. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 08:39:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_818416 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_818416 Teide 'He simply slammed the phone down, fuming, and stormed outside. A second later he realised that it was a mobile so would not turn off when it was slammed down so he went and hung up, possibly even more furious than before.' I wasn't sure whether to put this on here or NaNoWriMo Ate My Soul. Thought I'd be optimistic and laugh at it instead! Some of these quotes are brilliant by the way! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 09:56:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_819195 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_819195 KatieDovel Sort of long, but I'm pretty proud of this exerpt/quote thing: He ran to catch the small girl before she collapsed on the ground, ignoring the threat of death all around him. The blast had caked her bloody face with mud. He cleared her melted mess of hair out of the way. Half of her face had been blown apart, and was melted to her flesh. There was still one big, green eye staring up at him, almost kindly. Her mess of lips moved, but no sound came out. “You’ll be okay. Just wait!” Tears ran down his cheeks, and he begged the sky, the ground, Mariana, anything he could see. “Please, just hang on, our safehouse is just across the street. It will be okay. Just like Parias, when everything was good, and kind. Before we came here!” He almost forgot she had lived in the City her entire life. Her half-lips moved again, and he leaned over. She smelled metallic and earthy. “It’s all been so ugly lately. Tell me something…beautiful.” Blood bubbled across her lips, and what skin was stilli intact on her face turned a sickly pale. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 10:08:27 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_819319 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_819319 KatieDovel *inspired!* This is really awesome:) Just sayin' Wed, 23 Nov 2011 10:10:19 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_819334 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=10#forum_thread_comment_819334 Serendipitist “The revolution?” She said with a sneer. “You’ve probably never heard of it. It’s so underground.” Oh hipster rebels, how I have come to love you. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 11:07:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_820012 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_820012 thomlina 'Yes, brother.' She nodded and stood to leave. But as she neared the door she turned and looked back at him. 'If she doesn’t give an heir, what will you do to her?' He smirked. 'There would be no place for her here. I’m afraid that your companion would be out in the gutter just like Jun.' Wed, 23 Nov 2011 16:18:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_823697 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_823697 robertsloan2 [quote=flamento] My favourite so far has to be the first line. "This is the tale of that secret, and how it effected the lives of eight men, one woman, a child, and a very nice piano." At once and the same time, it explains everything and nothing. [/quote] Nice. I love that kind of teaser. Typo though, of that wicked kind that spell checks never catch. It should be "affected" rather than "effected" - do NOT worry about fixing this or anything till the end. I just naturally proofread when I read anything. Hope this helps on December 1st! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:35:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824518 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824518 robertsloan2 [quote=crazygirl9310] [quote]Not commit suicide?” Chris offered helpfully. “Ngh.” Of course that’d be the only thing his parents approved of. [/quote] hehe, my favorite part of today's writing. [/quote] I love this! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:36:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824536 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824536 robertsloan2 [quote=ShonnaRose] '“Ha! You really want to help those pathetic humans!” the demon exclaimed, his voice shaking the earth around them. “You are a much higher creature than that! Would you really lower yourself to help them!” “Of course,” the dragon replied, it’s voice as gentle as the rain around them. “Humans may be foolish and pathetic, but that is how they are supposed to be. Humans become greedy and allow hatred into their hearts, because they don’t know any better. All they can think about is how to do things easier and faster. We should pity them and help them whenever we can. It’s our duty as surperior beings to do so. That’s our purpose in this world.” “That’s a load of crap, and you know it,” the demon replied, it’s red eyes glowing bright. “Helping humans is useless, because they’ll never change. Once you save these, they will just go back to being the same greedy creatures they have always been! What a foolish waste of time! You are just like them! Soft and weak! What a pathetic creature you have become, my friend!” “Humans can change,” the dragon replied. “They have that ability to change their lives around in an instant. They also have something you will never have! A heart!” The dragon snarled, bearing its fangs at the demon. The time for talk was over, and it had done no good. This demon had himself snared into a deep hatred that he will never escape from. Not even death would save his soul now. His death, however, would save the lives of the humans, who were watching this exchange with eyes wide in wondermeant.' This is my favorite part of the story right here so far. It's a little rough right now, but it is just the first draft. It'll probably be a whole lot better when I go back to edit it. [/quote] Cool! I like the dragon, when I run into dragons in novels I prefer sympathetic ones. This one's great. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:38:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824568 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824568 robertsloan2 [quote=ijorissen] "Some people are born awesome, and I'm obviously not one of them. So I'll just go sit in the corner over there, with my dunce cap on, and you can go cure cancer and solve world hunger. Come find me later, when you're not busy running a half marathon, and do me the favor of explaining your accomplishments in great detail, because even though I'm not your unemployed mother, I'd like to live vicariously through you, too. I want to call you an asshole, but that would make me a goddamn liar, because you're so fucking considerate. " [/quote] Love it! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:38:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824575 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824575 robertsloan2 [quote=Ryan Lohner] "The emperor’s palace dwarfs all around it, with a sparkling façade of white marble, and is the product of decades of labor. It was commissioned by Emperor Job I, who saw the building as the legacy he would leave behind as his family continued to rule forever. The result was horrific labors by uncountable slaves, and many deaths from disease and starvation as Job insisted on putting as much money as possible into the palace. The day it was completed, he proudly walked up the stairs and into the main front door to observe the fruits of others’ labor, where he was promptly killed by a loose ceiling tile. That night, the emperor’s family were all murdered as they slept, and their bodies displayed so many wounds from such a large array of implements that there was no way to tell what had actually killed them. No arrests were ever made, and the throne passed to a new family who had been waiting for just such an opportunity." This is just the second paragraph, by the way. If a story's going to be dark, you'd best get people prepared soon. [/quote] FUN! Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:39:34 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824579 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_824579 robertsloan2 I'm reposting this from my excerpts because I'm ludicrously proud of it. I don't expect great prose during Nanowrimo. I expect good plot, written fast with a thousand errors, and characters who come to life immediately to contradict anything I want them to and hand me a better story. This book is no exception. It is my first Horror novel. It wrung me out writing it and these are the last few sentences of it. ****** These are the Dark Ones. They take the shapes we give them. They live in the places between stories and the pounding blood of our nightmares. They appear where the shadows of your laundry and the stuff piled up on the floor move in the light from outside the curtains. Sometimes they come when they’re called. Wed, 23 Nov 2011 17:41:02 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_824604 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_824604 superwhoshertrekkiknight Pretty much everything I've been writing is logorrhific crap, but I have to say I'm pretty proud of this. "There was a sign on the computer. Or, rather, there was a piece of old fashioned printer paper sloppily affixed to the top of the bulky computer monitor with grubby masking tape. The clumsy black Sharpie writing read, “PUBLIC ACCESS COMPUTER.” Some punk had endeavored to cross out the L, before undoubtedly realizing that crossing out something in Sharpie would do absolutely no good whatsoever." Wed, 23 Nov 2011 20:32:27 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_826443 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_826443 Walt3rd I wrote this one during a confrontation between the MC and a minor villain. I originally wanted the MC to say he had just begun to fight, but something else came to mind instead. - “Why’d you do that to Peter for, you bastard.” Neal licked his lips pondering his move. George was next to the bathroom door. Door to the hallway behind him. All that was behind him was the camera and a window. “Tell you what. You let me go out that door and we call it quits, right” George actually laughed. “Call it quits? Ever hear of John Paul Jones?” Behind Neal, George could see Genevieve struggling with the ropes tying her hands to the bed. She seemed to be working the rope from under the bed around to the back. That would give her some movement. The question threw Neal for a moment, who warily watched George while thinking of an answer. “Yeah. He’s the guy that does the Darth Vader voice in Star Wars, right?” Wed, 23 Nov 2011 23:48:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_828072 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_828072 thesunscreen "My name is Justice, but for the last moments of your life you can think of me as the curse of the Thorns." Thu, 24 Nov 2011 03:46:49 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_828956 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_828956 jblanc Just wanted to say this truly made me laugh. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 18:20:25 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_835310 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_835310 Prinkes I would buy this book. Just because of that paragraph. Hell, because of that first line. Thu, 24 Nov 2011 19:40:39 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_836091 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_836091 TewiInaba “I can't sleep! Not now!” She whispered to herself, trying to protect the one small whole piece of herself that was left. She whimpered as her mind turned on itself, overcoming her efforts to protect the final shard of Altantsetseg, and it started menacingly approaching the final piece, attacking that directly. Tears flowed down her face as she cried out for help that she, deep down inside her, knew would never come, and she finally succumbed to the attack that her sister gave her, collapsing into a crying heap on the floor. She lay there for what seemed to her like an eternity, her stomach growling being the least of her worries as she tried to recover from the mental assult. The room's bone-chilling temperature and silence did little to calm her, and in fact kept giving her the feeling that yes, she was alone, and truly, she could not do anything to help. All she was good at was raising hopes and then quickly dashing them to the jagged rocks of reality. -- “His eyes are a different color, and he has several scars upon his body.” The Nightmare Empress' light voice rang out defeat to Kaze's ears. "Go fetch the man for me, so that I may show him something that will ring in his soul for all eternity, tormenting him with enough pain so as to fulfill his penance. He shall know the true meaning of fear and suffering, and only through that shall he be redeemed." Thu, 24 Nov 2011 21:22:50 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_837070 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_837070 thomlina 'An heir is needed for my company to continue since my young bride was unable to give me one. I must count on this girl.' He rubbed his chin. 'The only reason that she didn’t is because you never gave her the chance to.' Emi stated. You tossed that poor girl and her baby out in the cold!' 'It was spring.' Fri, 25 Nov 2011 07:46:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_840219 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_840219 Cephalopodesque Super long, I'm sorry, but it's pretty much the only serious part so far and I'm actually quite proud of it. For background, Moriah is an extremely religious city, and Rebecca is a citizen of it, while the narrator is not. “Then I’m even more sorry.” She actually looked like it, too. “I wish you could stay in Moriah.” And just like that, I desperately wanted to believe everything that the Morians did. That some higher power had some big plan. That even if we all got wiped out by the Trinity, we’d all meet again in the next life. That things happened for a reason, and not just because people were evil or stupid or, worst of all, because that was just the way it was. I felt like Rebecca existed in a different universe from me, one where the air was a little warmer and the out-of-bounds lines were clearly drawn, while I lived in a cold one with no boundaries and nothing at my back, where absolutely anything could lunge out of the nothingness and rip me to shreds, and it just wouldn’t matter. And they thought *they* experienced temptation. “I’d never fit in,” I mumbled. “You could,” she said earnestly. I shook my head even though I knew she was almost right. I had no doubt that Mirande would be delighted my soul had been saved and would have no problem with letting me live here. Rebecca and I could be best friends, and maybe after a while there would actually be some more people who might cry if I died. I’d never have to touch the gun Mom’s husband gave me again. I wouldn’t have to watch my back anymore. I could give up muggings for hymns and asphalt for cobblestone. I’d be safe and happy and loved, and it would all depend on my ability to keep up an act. I must have looked like I needed a hug, because Rebecca walked over and gave me one. “Go to sleep, okay?” she sighed. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 19:46:26 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_846967 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_846967 Echokind "Now, I know it all do not really look like much when ya' first see it, but that's the thing, boy. Nothing is what it seems at a first glance. You have always gotta dig a little deeper and look a little closer to find the good stuff." I do not know why I like this quote so much, but I do. :B Man, I really love this character, though. I am starting to feel a bit guilty for making him an antagonist in disguise. Fri, 25 Nov 2011 21:05:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_847854 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_847854 J.A. Kosse Most of the weird crap comes from the chapter where my MC is going insane. "I turned back to Michael, who was staring at me like I’d just flushed myself in the toilet. Which I’d tried before." Sat, 26 Nov 2011 03:31:29 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_850211 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_850211 ZoraSkywalker Ditto, I would totally read that novel!!! It sounds awesome!!! (And Prinkes I love your avatar) Sat, 26 Nov 2011 10:23:33 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_852637 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_852637 ZoraSkywalker Gorgeous, in a morbid kinda way! I love this quote so much! Sat, 26 Nov 2011 10:26:06 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_852657 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_852657 Mowo64 Spencer nodded slowly. Something was starting to knot up in his stomach. “…she yelled at your parents… were they talking about the asylum? Sending you away?” X nodded. “Did she yell when they sent Z away?” He asked next. Z stared at the floor, giving a small sigh. All of the sudden, he seemed darkly serious. “…no…” he said at last. “…Krissy just… cried… hugged Z some… but mainly cried…” There was silence for a moment. Krissy—whoever she was—was obviously the closest of the family to her brothers. She had stood up for them, defended their sanity, and done all she could to rescue them from this fate. And now, ten years later, all X and Z’s combined memories could recall of her was that she yelled when they were home and cried when they were gone. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 17:40:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_880978 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_880978 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames “Alright,” said a voice from the other side. “I was a bit worried about you in there. I heard a noise and thought”—THUD! He had opened the door, so I hit him on the head with the empty chamber pot. Now we were free. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:24:57 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881535 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881535 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames I might have wanted to explain that. My MCs are escaping from a dungeon, and their only weapons are a knife and an empty chamber pot. Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:26:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881550 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881550 everyoneelsehasthoughtofmyothernames I wish there was a button for correcting posts. It should say "opened the door TO THE CELL" Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:27:07 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881566 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881566 Calista.Artemis Nice. =P Mon, 28 Nov 2011 18:34:20 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881661 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_881661 pinkrobot I wrote this line today and I'm pretty sure it's one of the best in my novel: "Just a week before, I asked Fern how we knew for sure anything was real and she said, ‘Ruby, that’s what I like to call a bottom-of-the-ocean thought. I don’t like to think about anything deeper than a rain puddle.’" Mon, 28 Nov 2011 19:00:58 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_882009 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_882009 Cephalopodesque Ooh, I do like that one. So much character development in so few words, and it's funny, too. Tue, 29 Nov 2011 16:39:00 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_892657 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_892657 PastExploits Now, I don't think it's the best thing in the whole story, but it is my favorite. This paragraph is the culmination of everything I worked toward this month. It's the end (well, there's an epilogue after) and it's the scene I had in my head since I started this story. I feel like in showing this, I'm baring some hidden part of me. But here it goes: It was moments before she made a sound or moved at all. Father Juan and Gabriel stared at the crumpled girl with bated breath. And then all at once, with a chorus of screams and growls, she yelled, “Priest! I fear that you may all ready know my name. You see, I am that Wicked One, the Serpent of Old, the Father of Lies and the King of Babylon. The Angel of Light.” She rose on broken legs, and Father Juan and Gabriel could hear the snapping and shattering of bones, like twigs under a child’s steps. “I am Satan, Himself, the Devil made flesh.” Wed, 30 Nov 2011 12:41:11 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_903702 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_903702 miss_technicality I laughed SO hard at this. It reminded me of one of my characters (from a few novels ago) who also would totally do that. I should write another story about her. Sat, 03 Dec 2011 01:07:45 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_926965 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_926965 miss_technicality Just stumbled across this while skimming through it again... (Background: MC is a cop whose wife has recently been kidnapped. He's looking through photo albums of her.) Good thing he was married to her or else he would have to arrest himself for stalking. ...Yeah. It was late. Sat, 03 Dec 2011 01:22:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_926982 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_926982 EQPlayer "Her eyes were green fire at a low simmer." Sun, 04 Dec 2011 14:45:38 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_933382 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_933382 PadawanBlaine [quote]"Perhaps for them it’s nothing -- they’ve seen so many Apocalypses it’s like Sunday school. Annoying, but there, at the end of a completely normal week full of deaths and destruction. Nothing important."[/quote] And this one, though an older one still good enough for me; it encapsulates, mostly, the whole essence of the book until a certain point.. [quote]“We’re so weird.” Lancelot sits up straight, rubbing his head. His words are thick with the foreign English accent, but he knows Mark can understand them perfectly. “I can’t believe this.” He looks down at Mark, who’s still lying on the bed, scoffing at the ceiling. “I know,” says the ghost on a low tone, seeming annoyed--but his eyes are still shining and bright. “We’re the weirdos. I’m a ghost.” “I’m Death’s son,” snaps Lancelot. Surprised at his own words, he rubs his face. He’s really tired. Everything in front of him seems to shake when he opens his eyes again, so he leans forward, elbows on knees, and buries his face in his hands. Careful, though, not to press down his bruise. “How’s that for a weird thing?”[/quote] Mon, 05 Dec 2011 08:39:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_936725 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_936725 FenixPheonix I like some of the poetry I've done for this one. I start and end each chapter with a short poem. This is one towards the end of the book: And I shall stand as a firebrand, Not for what is or what has been, But as a symbol for what should be. Another one shortly thereafter: Do not be proud of what you are. Rather, strive to become that which You will be proud of being. Strive to build that which You wish to be remembered for. And strive to destroy only that which You wish to be known for erasing. But I must say, my favorite line is the last 77 words of my story: The sun will rise and set on this planet, this scorched land of death. Over and over, it shall come and go, overlooking an empty world, one without change. And then, one day, long after the events that ended the epoch, a flower will grow, once more opening its petals to the bright sun overhead, spreading its leaves in the light, bringing hope again to this barren wasteland. And god will smile, and say, “It is good.” Tue, 06 Dec 2011 00:27:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_940940 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_940940 Angryman "You don't understand how things work, do you boy? Live, die, it's all a matter of luck and willpower. I should be dead a hundred times over, yet here I am." -Hood Adams the Volcano Mon, 12 Dec 2011 00:44:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_965034 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_965034 Obscurite_Asile 'Can I just say, I’m aware of the fact my definition of Goth makes it look like I’m a pretentious asshole but you try thinking of a brilliant opening line.' My mc is writing the story. Mon, 26 Dec 2011 22:10:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1003096 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1003096 aliaswriter haha; yes, John Paul Jones is Luke's father. Tue, 27 Dec 2011 17:09:12 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_1005059 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=11#forum_thread_comment_1005059 murphyslawyer Oh that is too cute. XD Thu, 05 Jan 2012 23:43:44 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1035878 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=1#forum_thread_comment_1035878 murphyslawyer My kelpie just said this in the coffeehouse, referring to his seven-year-old daughter: [quote]I've yet to find the person she can't charm. Gets it from her mother, I swear. The ability to inspire sheer bloody terror? That's from me.[/quote] I don't know why I love it this much, I just do. Thu, 05 Jan 2012 23:58:40 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1035897 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1035897 murphyslawyer XD My brooding Great Famine-era Irishman contemplating politics over his pint... I enjoy this a lot. [quote]Sulky now, Thomas raised his hand to motion for another pint. The publican, well aware that when Thomas Finnegan decided to tie one on it was best to let him do the tying and untangle the knots later, offered the pint without comment. Thomas pulled it towards himself and brooded into it for a long moment, his fondness for the drink making him of the opinion that all of Ireland’s problems could be fixed if they simply had a sit down with Lord Russell and Trevelyan and had a few pints of Guinness together. [/quote] Fri, 06 Jan 2012 02:49:51 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1036022 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1036022 I_Just_Want_To_Fly I turned around, holograms flickering behind me, Supermassive Black Hole playing from my iPod, and extended my wings. "Do I look like a supergenius mutant freak to you?" I love that so much. She actually is a supergenius mutant from the future and she's invented holograms. The thing is, she's fallen into the year 1956 so she's going insane... No internet, gonna miss the Muse album that's coming out in October, etc... Sat, 07 Jan 2012 09:39:22 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1039150 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1039150 I_Just_Want_To_Fly Sheer bloody terror... I like that kid already :D Sat, 07 Jan 2012 09:42:56 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1039154 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1039154 aliaswriter I'm not very good at deep, philosophical thoughts, so this is, sadly, the best I have so far: He looked out in the distance, seeing nothing in particular, except maybe the past. Mon, 09 Jan 2012 23:41:55 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1046534 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1046534 I_Just_Want_To_Fly "The door creaked open. The classroom looked pretty normal, if a little dusty. Chairs were stacked on desks, chairs that hadn’t been used for a few years now. Whoever was in here last hadn’t turned out the lights, and a single flourescent bulb flickered above. The ground was covered in dust, and in that dust were footprints, some looking more recent than others, as if they had developed over a long period of time. On the tables sat pages of outdated textbooks, torn from their bindings and scattered around the room. The heater still blew air, but it was no longer warm. On the desk was a dusty laptop, an empty hampster cage, and a dead rose, a long lost memory of an old teacher’s lover." Sat, 11 Feb 2012 16:08:09 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1132244 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1132244 Obscurite_Asile “Such a peculiar first date.” Agnes smiled and rested her head on Ambroses shoulder, looking at nothing. “But I wouldn’t have it any other way.” This would be a pathetically cheesy send of to the next chapter but of course Ambrose had to respond with what we were all thinking. He turned his gaze to Agnes, who did not move. “Seriously? There is nothing you would have preferred to do than see my father murdered? Are you sadistic or something?” Agnes showed no acknowledgement to these questions until she replied in her dream like voice, “Shut up.” ....It makes me laugh. Tue, 14 Feb 2012 22:40:16 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1141183 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1141183 MurillionBlue A variety of quotes from my novel, ranging from kinda funny to kinda depressing to one's I'm quite proud of coming up with. FMC: “Didn’t your mother ever teach you not to hit girls?” MMC: “She did. I don’t see how that applies here.” Never attack a mind reader. They’re always expecting it. [about the MMC's motivations for comforting the FMC] Not all motivations are pure. [about an army of clones of one of the main characters, who has disappeared into their ranks] “Didn’t you ever realise they’d all think differently?” villain: "Ideas can't die." main character: "But they can be forgotten." [after the character has just broken down again; part of said character's justification for drowning its sorrows] "I just wanna forget everything, 'cause you can't miss what you can't remember." Fri, 24 Feb 2012 10:30:05 -0800 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1167248 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1167248 ChoKiba <em>Female Villain</em>: You are no mere instrument. You are far more. And anyone who might tell you otherwise only seeks to blind you to the truth. <em>MMC 3</em>: Than I shall choose to blind myself. <em>MMC 2</em>: You know a lesser man might think that you just tried to insult my intelligence. <em>MMC 1</em>: A lesser man would be right. <em>MMC 1</em>: You know, we won't let them kill you. <em>FMC 1</em>: Let is a pretty convenient excuse Tue, 24 Apr 2012 11:25:37 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1316636 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1316636 Words Against the Silence "You and your husband are both thrill seeking art thieves. I expect you not to listen. But that doesn't mean that I have to like the fact that you refuse to leave my door locked." "He stepped out into the hallway and allowed himself a brief smile. It was nice to know that he could still tell the truth and make someone think something entirely different." "She had never liked stillness, she admitted ruefully in a quiet corner of her mind. Even when she was calm, she was always moving somehow, luxuriating in the freedom to do so after having to train herself to be almost perfectly still on the streets. And before... Before, it had simply been anathema to the girl Lise had once been, the one who had always been more willing to kick someone's ass for hurting her big brother than allow him to smooth over the problem with diplomatic words." "Peter bowed his head. “I love you,” he told her across the dead line. Then he calmly set the phone down and punched straight through the wall behind Lise’s desk." Wed, 25 Apr 2012 18:09:18 -0700 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1320168 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/17798?page=12#forum_thread_comment_1320168