Funniest line in your story http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283 AngelsFallFar Basically, comment with the best/funniest line of your Nano. It can be dialog or the way you worded a sentence. Mine would be: “How much did I drink last night?” Eric said hesitantly. “Well,” Derik leaned against the wall, “since you both have your pants on, not enough.” Mon, 07 Nov 2011 06:12:35 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_542452 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_542452 Kaydon_the_dinosaur I started a paragraph today with "By the light of Tommy's face..." Yeah, even with a phosphorescent face that still makes me giggle. Or maybe it's just because I've been writing since 7 pm. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 07:45:56 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544188 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_544188 bandgirlz Okay, so after my MC meets the top-secret organization, on the top-secret half floor of a rundown building, and basically gets held captive there for a while and threatened, the guy who's been threatening her turns to her and says, "Do you need parking validation?" Mon, 07 Nov 2011 09:57:25 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545520 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_545520 xxCoFxx [quote] “Absolutely not!” Kit roared. “That’s like trying to tell Doctor Cat he’s not a doctor! It can’t be done and furriness and cuteness will prevail!” [/quote] I just had to make a Doctor Cat reference somewhere...I love that comic haha Mon, 07 Nov 2011 19:28:11 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_552372 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_552372 quinsifer I wrote a scene in the first chapter about my main character, Junis, sneaking out of her bedroom window to take a spin on her flying whale, Oshen. A shadow passed in the corner of her eye and Junis quickly snapped her head in its direction. A large stingray was slowly descending. Its flat, grey body was angled down and the rolling fins fluttered along its sides. Junis hunched low in her saddle, whispering to Oshen, “Steady. An enemy is approaching.” Oshen indifferently flew on, and the stingray passed beside them with only the slightest acknowledgement. “Coward!" Junis called after it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 19:59:24 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553063 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553063 writingismydrug "What's worse than being in the middle of nowhere in Maine?!" "Being in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin?" "No, because in Wisconsin there's a beautful four laned road that will get you out of there! In the middle of nowhere Maine, it's a two laned road that takes you to the middle of nowhere New Hampshire!" Mon, 07 Nov 2011 20:01:07 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553109 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553109 Miikaan I have two. c: [quote]"You're not really the sharpest needle in the haystack, are you?" she stated.[/quote] Aha. Yes I am. [quote]Clara never figured out what irony really was, but knew there were moments where things seemed cynically funny, and guessed that that was what irony was. [/quote] The wording is terrible, but I'm not touching it until December. I need some comical relief come that time because I'm definitely going to be stressed. orz Mon, 07 Nov 2011 20:12:18 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553324 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_553324 xxCoFxx I found another one: [quote] They leaned in to read what he had written, excited…until they saw the first line. "And then, there were ferrets." [/quote] Mon, 07 Nov 2011 20:40:25 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554016 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_554016 Lydia_Ember Mine's a mixed fan fic on video games and original characters, so that's where the humor lies. [quote]"All of the-" "Is that truly essential, whomever you are?" asked Link. There was silence. "Thank you." He walked up to the fallen wizard but, before he could say anything, the mysterious voice said quickly, "All of the enemies have been defeated. Link relized the power of Nayru's Love Sigma." [/quote] He's really going to hate that line in my NaNo. That was only the third time I used it. Mon, 07 Nov 2011 23:31:36 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_558322 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_558322 aviopticus I'm partial to this from my story "Greenleaf, Vermont was founded in 1791 by settlers from Massachusetts who weren’t particularly good at naming towns." Tue, 08 Nov 2011 01:33:42 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_561171 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_561171 Talus Storm "Because I can." - the bad guy. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 02:28:11 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_562528 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_562528 One Piece Girl In reference to the MC (Bayard) who doesn't know how to use his one and only weapon: Daithi placed his tattooed hand over his face and sighed, “We’re doomed.” Tue, 08 Nov 2011 02:41:48 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_562864 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_562864 LenLuver This is right after Riley uses a super cheesy pick-up line on Tay, which, by the way, was "If you were an angle, you'd a acute." She promptly stomped on his foot. Riley winced and grimaced. "Dude! You're wearing heels!" "And you're wearing the delusion that one day I'll go out with you. So we're even." Tue, 08 Nov 2011 03:32:47 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564215 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564215 Dunmaglas nice. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 03:33:05 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564226 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564226 lenaih1 "Who called?" “Just the President. No biggie.” Tue, 08 Nov 2011 03:46:02 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564553 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_564553 Lightshow She could hardly believe what she was saying, but it turns being cursed by a man with giant wolves for pets really opens you up to the possibility of things like time travel. At that point, he could have said the rainbow really WAS made out of Skittles and she might have almost believed him. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 04:31:41 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_565763 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_565763 Geolie giggle Tue, 08 Nov 2011 04:37:15 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_565904 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_565904 Rithene Hmm...I'm not a good judge of my own comedic prowess, so I'll post a couple quotes and let y'all decide. Context: attempting to climb down from a tree. Everyone is laughing at the protagonist. "Well, she couldn’t help it if her wayward hair now had pine needles in it and she probably looked like an extremely hungover monkey!" Context: trying to convince a man that something odd is happening. Said man frequently doles out to teenagers his Glare of Unwarranted Suspicion. "'Coincidence,' Pumroy repeated, giving her the Glare of Possibly Slightly Warranted Suspicion." Context: unimportant. "'I’m thinking. Um—yeah, this will work.' Des said. She took a deep breath, then gripped her hair on both sides of her head and spoke in a despairing voice. 'This is awful! We’re stuck out here, we can’t see anything, we have no food or water or shelter, and every time we try to leave, we end up back in the same place! This couldn’t get any worse!' Instantly, it started to pour. Des stared up at the sky. 'No freakin’ way!' she shrieked in delight." Tue, 08 Nov 2011 05:02:42 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_566601 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_566601 LauraRiddle "And then there was her writing; for years she had written romance novels about living people. Now that she was dead (undead, actually), she’d have to completely change everything to meet the expectations of a reader base she had no idea about. Did dead people even read romances about other dead people? She covered her mouth with both her hands, sick at the idea of having to write a sizzling sexcapade of a skeleton and his rotting bride." I have a terribly dark sense of humor. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 06:12:02 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568043 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568043 nerrdygrrl15 "Sorry," April says, "But I've got to dash!" God, she thinks, what was that? Her first witty remark as an outlaw and it's 'sorry, I've got to dash'? Horrible form. She is least worried about Mae. Mae is quiet, Mae will not maim assorted small mammals. Lucinda is wary of March. She has freed both Mae and April from their prison, but the boy is still suspicious. Something about his bone structure, she decides. His femurs look particularly dubious, but Lucinda hesitatingly agrees to release him after his fifteenth request. I am partial to all three of these. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 06:17:25 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568144 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568144 Willow. Sorta long, but I just wrote it and fell in love with my characters, maybe it's just because I'm so tired. Cameron pushed open the doors to the school kitchens. “They don’t lock the doors?” “False trust in their students, apparently,” Cameron said, smiling. “Leaves more opportunity for adventure.” “Adventure being messing around in the kitchen.” “You’ve got it! See, you’re starting to get the hang of my logic,” he tapped his temple twice before turning to call out for Lana and Gavin. “Where’d you guys go?” he asked the air. A cabinet burst open and Gavin came tumbling out onto the floor at the same time as Lana jumped out from behind a shelf of cooking pans. They both pointed sporks at us, Gavin after he sat up in a daze. “Expelliarmus!” Lana shouted before doubling over with laughter. “Of course Lana is the one to make the Harry Potter reference,” I said, grabbing a spork from the opened package on the counter nearest me. “That was a Harry Potter reference?” Gavin asked sounding rather confused. “Yes, Gavin,” Lana said crossing her arms. “How much you want to bet I’d win if we had a war right here, right now?” “A lot,” I answered, “considering you are the only one of the four of us that is capable of making Harry Potter spells and enchantments.” “You have a point there,” she put the tines of the spork between her teeth, crossing her ankles, swaying back and forth, and staring off into space, deep in thought. “As I always do,” I said haughtily. Cameron scoffed and I shoved him. He threw an apple at me under hand. I threw it back at him like a baseball with just as much force. It hit him in the back of a head with a thunk. “Ow. Hey! What was that for?” I stuck my tongue out at him. Lana giggled, “That was a hollow thunk.” “Well, everyone, you’re free to pick on me now,” Cameron pushed his glasses up on his face and swung his head Napoleon Dynamite style. “Gosh.” “Vote for Pedro,” Gavin said with an accent, climbing to his feet. “Harry Potter, Napoleon Dynamite, what next?” We all exchanged glances. “Hey you guys!” we all called in unison. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 06:48:38 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568709 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568709 Willow. lol the second one :D Tue, 08 Nov 2011 06:50:33 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568740 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_568740 Lokemele I think it might be cliche, but it's still funny. My MFC telling her husband, post-coitally, she's pregnant: “How did that happen?” he asked. She looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “You’re a doctor and a father of two, and you can ask me that after what we just did?” Tue, 08 Nov 2011 07:52:50 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_569632 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_569632 RamblingArtistNina Shirley nearly snorted as the trio continued to drag the young man away from the rest of the town. She full out burst into laughter when the blond decided he had enough and activated his eres, furiously trying to fly away with all three still attached to his limbs. "So… I just made up half of that stuff right now, but that was good enough, right?" "You what!?" It had to have been because she was so tired, but Norma had to struggle (in which she failed) to pry her eyes off of his toned chest and keep her mouth from drooling. Literally, her mouth was watering. She blinked hard, and forced herself to look away as her face grew red. Calm your ass down, Norma! It is perfectly normal for your roommate (very attractive roommate, her mind added) to take off his shirt in front of you. There is no need to stare so much at- Oh good gravy, it should be illegal to look that attractive! Tue, 08 Nov 2011 08:46:56 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_570198 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_570198 HecticZ "Great, Mr. I Pretend Dead While My Friends Are Worrying is now a perv. Did you catch a glimpse or are you actually honest and only interested in me? Because that would surprise me. In the past hour, you’ve shown us less honesty than a push up bra." Not the funniest, but one of my favourites. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 18:38:37 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_576852 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_576852 lifelessmind totally unrelated to the thread, but your avatar cracks me up..I have a similar photo of me crammed into a childs car! Tue, 08 Nov 2011 19:14:07 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_577522 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_577522 FairytaleHero “I’ll assume you’re dead if you’re not back by midnight, okay?” I rather liked that one. :-P I don't have many funny lines but I've got some planned for later on... I hope I remember them by the time I write those scenes. Tue, 08 Nov 2011 20:21:42 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_578852 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_578852 TwilightSparkle [quote] “Must’ve been traumatizing.” That’s what I say, but what I think is 'You witnessed a shark attack… I witnessed mass murder. Lucky.' [/quote] [quote] “Kill me.” Foghorn says, rubbing his temples. “Okay!” Houston says obliviously, turning to grope for a utensil on the kitchen counter. “He’s KIDDING, Houston.” I say, sighing. “Oh.” She says, frowning. “Darn.” “Is she crazy?” Foghorn whispers. “No. And she’s not deaf either.” Houston says helpfully. “Damn.” Foghorn mutters. “Heard that!” She giggles. [/quote] Thu, 17 Nov 2011 04:08:35 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_733996 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=1#forum_thread_comment_733996 belesaria Conversation between MC and a dragon: “If you aren't careful you shall give me a big head.” Magnus snuffled. “If I do, I could as easily deflate it for you. I have very sharp teeth.” Thu, 17 Nov 2011 05:48:52 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735423 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735423 ChoKiba In the middle of a serious bit between two other characters Ashley de Lauren breaks in with one line: <em>"Well damn," de Lauren murmured. "I was wondering what seemed so innocent about you."</em> Thu, 17 Nov 2011 06:09:53 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735684 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735684 Dhynamic I personally liked his bit: [quote]They needed cash. And here he was, finding deals what would take care of so many problems the crew of the cruiser had, only to have her say, 'We're not criminals, Rindall.' Of course not, he'd answered, because if we were you wouldn't be in debt up to your tits, and then latrine duty had happened. It wasn't bloody fair.[/quote] Thu, 17 Nov 2011 06:27:16 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735880 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_735880 Rydain Context: Huan wants to get in on an organized counterfeiting ring. * * * * * Jin shook his head, savored another sip of liquor. The initial bite burned long and clean, giving way to a nuanced finish. “You’re insane.” “So says the man drinking paint thinner.” “Not my fault you lack an appreciation for wuliangye.” “I’m telling you, cuz’.” Huan raised his drink, a radioactive green concoction containing three different novelty stir sticks and enough mixers to drown all distinction to be had from the original choice of alcohol. “Everything tastes better with an umbrella in it.” Jin’s gaze followed a passing waiter, trailing over his muscled shoulders and down to a firm rear view in fitted jeans. “I’ll file that for future reference.” “That wasn’t a guarantee, you know.” Thu, 17 Nov 2011 06:57:26 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_736168 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_736168 Burnt Sushi An unexpected character (who dies quite horribly within 2k words of her arrival) inspired this: Known by her colleagues as Bob, Bobbie MacRoberts was one of those unintentionally lovely women who try, but wouldn’t have to try so hard if they just stopped trying. At 23, she was socially awkward enough to be incapable of taking to a party, but just odd enough to make her adorable, in the kind of way that baby seals with a concussion are cute when they fall down. Sadly, she was devoured by her boss shortly after this. Thu, 17 Nov 2011 16:11:45 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_739722 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_739722 Geesafaire Context: Kat (a time traveler) wants to save the Hindenburg. Jack says: "You have less than twenty minutes to get onto a military base and convince them that the Hindenburg is about to be destroyed by fire. But since you don’t know exactly how it's going to happen, even if they believe you, they probably won't be able to stop it. Then they’ll likely take you into custody, as you were the only one who knew about the disaster beforehand. Keep in mind that you have no identification, and there is absolutely no documentation of your birth, as you won't be born for another eighty-some years. But by all means, go for it." Thu, 17 Nov 2011 17:49:23 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740684 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740684 imaginati I don't know if this is the funniest part of my story, but the visual I got when I wrote this makes me laugh to this day! "Well, I can't meet the Captain of the hell hounds dressed like this, now can I?" He went to his closet and reached in the back to pull out a dark purple robe with strange symbols stitched in gold. He shrugged it on and pulled a gold belt tight around his waist. Reaching into the closet again, he found a square purple hat with a golden tassel on top. Fixing it on his head, he turned to Miss Tia. "Do I look all right?" She just stared at him. "You look like a mental patient who's trying out for Fantasia on Ice." "Good enough. Let's go, young lady." Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:00:18 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740816 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740816 Glaedr A few moments later, they settled together into what appeared to be spongy loam, but which had felt far more to Lydia like solid rock upon landing. She took a deep, shuddering breath, her eyes still screwed shut. She moved her head experimentally, and her neck protested instantly, sending a dull throbbing pain down through her right shoulder. From somewhere off to the right (she thought) there came the faint rustling sounds of someone moving through the undergrowth. “Are you alright?” Luke asked, sounding very winded indeed. Her eyes opened straight away. Her head had come to rest on one of his shoulders. Not trusting herself to speak without swearing, she tried to nod instead, and her neck glowered at her again. She groaned. “If you ever do that again, I swear I'll beat you.” He laughed breathlessly, being cut off almost instantly by a harsh cry from the same direction that the rustling had come from. “BURRRRRRN!” It sounded suspiciously like Helena. They looked at each other, and then scrambled quickly to their feet, running into the trees to find her. Another set of footsteps behind them announced to them that Cormac had landed, and had also heard the shout. They sped together into a small clearing, in which Helena was standing over a small pile of smouldering ashes, her hair full of small leaves and smoking at the tips, and an expression of intense loathing plastered across her face. “Something wrong, dear?” Cormac said as he arrived behind them. He sounded like he was grinning again. “The nettles offended me.” She said darkly. “They have been annihilated. “You torched a plant for stinging you?” Cormac was scandalised. “It'd better have been a really bad set of stings.” “If you value your life,” Helena growled, hobbling forward, “You will never speak of it again.” Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:07:03 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740888 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_740888 heybluebird Basically Emily (age 16) is trying to convince her sister Erika (20) to let her tag along to a party (which is also a date for Erika...) Erika keeps telling her no, Emily keeps insisting. Finally, we get this exchange. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “No,” Erika replied simply. “For once, I think Mom would even agree with my decision. You cannot go to the party. You’re too young.” “I’m sixteen,” Emily insisted. “I turn seventeen in two months –“ “Can you vote?” Erika asked, interrupting her sister’s rant. “No. But I don’t see what that has to do with –“ “Can you join the military?” “No. What does that have to do –“ “Can you buy cigarettes?” “No. I don’t even –“ “Can you even go into an R rated movie without Mom?” “What is your point?” “You’re too young.” Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:39:51 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_742755 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_742755 stormkatz hmm, it's a cheap line, but it's got to be Jackdaww just after running into a brick wall XD 'That wall just ran right into me - you all saw it, right? It's a disgrace!' Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:45:01 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_742824 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_742824 XVisiEX Aria: You're talking about MY NAME? You aren't even named after anything that makes sense! Lincus! Lexus: My name is Lexus! Aria: I hope you were conceived in the back of one then! That dialogue probably Fri, 13 Jan 2012 06:58:42 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1055249 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1055249 larelmian "Look!" I yelled, pointing. "A diversion!" Sat, 14 Jan 2012 01:54:22 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1057407 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1057407 FreakierThanThou Context: Chloe is about to move across the country for college and is telling her sister about her decision. [quote]"After all," she told Annie, who was in eighth grade when Chloe graduated, "our identities are largely built on the context that we are raised in, and without that context, who are we? Who am I? I need to leave to understand that." Annie considered an argument about how the context of Chloe's experiences would always follow her in the form of her memories, but she was currently doing a social experiment on how people treated teenagers with different attitudes, so she settled on "Whatever". [/quote] Annie's my favorite. Sat, 14 Jan 2012 05:18:23 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1058111 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1058111 ElliMelody I have a lot of funny lines. 2 chapters and a very sarcastic MMC. Some of my favorite exchanges between him and my FMC: [quote]“You know, I could care less if you are training to land a job as a secret agent, but I’ll tell you now that if I were thinking of hiring you, I’d throw you on the streets and find someone else. You are absolutely horrible at following people around.” I say, scowling. “Maybe I’m going for a job as an assassin. Then the moment the person you are following sees you, all you have to do is shove a knife in their throat.”[/quote] This one mostly makes me laugh because every time I read it, I remember the typo for knives. Instead, i wrote "nice." [quote]“What happened to you. I’m not the only one hiding scars.” “Well, if you must know, when I was ten my dog dragged me out of a burning house and deposited me in the shed in our backyard for safekeeping." "Wow. That's pretty amazing." "Yeah.... Well, actually, the shed was also on fire, but I'm sure he meant well."[/quote] Note number 1: He really never has had a dog. this will be pointed out later on, when he brings up the fact that werewolves rarely kept pets because its weird when you start being able to communicate them. (Frankly, i would love to understand my pets, but then again, I don't think I really want to know what Willow thinks when she eats various parts of my body and inflicts pain on me) [quote]Ezra thrusts the curtains closed over what looks like the sun itself. [/quote] I don't know why, but thinking of windows as 'the sun itself' makes me giggle like a school girl. [quote]“Its only bright for the first few days. You get used to the increased vision after a couple of hours really, but it doesn’t seem normal for about a week.” He says. I want to punch him in the face. [/quote] A good example of my FMC's opinion on the MMC. [quote]“ The kidnapping thing? We didn't think you'd come willingly... Plus, Thistle wanted an excuse to use his ninja costume." “Very funny. I highly doubt this has anything to do with ninja suits, God forbid. Meanwhile, it would be nice if you informed me who this Whistle is. Or, I don’t know, what the hell I am doing here?” [/quote] Thistle is a very serious character, although as I posted this i suddenly realized Thistle is not currently around. He is currently with the antagonist, and everyone thinks he is dead...which brings a new degree of hilarity to this. [quote]“I’m not a dog!” “What would you rather be? Dog, or mouse? I like both, personally. Your tiny, and a-” “I swear, if you finish that sentence, I will stab you in the eye. With. Your. Spinal. Cord.” “You’re tied to the bed. Good luck with that.”[/quote] Thu, 16 Feb 2012 04:29:30 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1142988 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1142988 dancer_kirsten These two make me smile because they're cute, rather than possessed by razor sharp humour LOL (BTW, the names of the main characters are changed for copyright reasons. Don't want to get sued, you see). *** S lifts Julia out of the sink and starts to dry her off. Katherine watches the whole procedure carefully. Then she starts to giggle and turns to me. “Papa?” “Yes, darling?” She points at Julia. “Bee-bee bewwie-buddon!” I grin and S laughs softly as she puts Julia in a clean diaper and then her dress. “Yes, she has,” I say. “We all have belly-buttons.” Her eyes go wide again. “You too?” I laugh out loud now, I can’t help it. “Yes, sweetheart, I have a belly-button, too. And so does mama.” In that totally shameless way that only toddlers are allowed to have, Katherine promptly lifts up her dress to inspect her tummy. She comes up with a grin. “Ah bewwie-buddon, papa!” *** (...) we kiss some more, deeply and slowly this time. “Papa, ahm hungee,” I hear Katherine say and I reluctantly break our kiss. “Just a moment, Katherine, I’m not done kissing your mother,” I say as I lean in for another kiss and Katherine lets out a dramatic sigh, throwing her little hands in the air in an adorable show of desperation. “But you kiss hew all da time!” *** Mon, 20 Feb 2012 12:24:21 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1155706 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1155706 MurillionBlue I have a few I really like: [while two of the heroes, Rati (a male gryphon) and Elure (a female elf) are fighting] Elure :“Didn’t your mother ever teach you not to hit girls?” Rati: “She did. I don’t see how that applies here.” [and a whole scene; while the heroes are returning to the city where the whole mess - er... adventure - started] The sun was setting, once again causing the heroes to be blinded by the shininess of the Shining Citadel. Except Zane, of course. Because he doesn’t have a face. No face means no eyes. No eyes means no blindiness. Yes, that was a made up word. You wanna know what isn’t a made up word? Defenestration. Would you like the Narrator to demonstrate on you? No? Tough luck. The Narrator pulled out a sledgehammer. “What are you doing, Ryhuul?” Elure asked. “Breaking the fourth wall.” The Narrator swung the sledgehammer at the fourth wall. It shattered, making a sound like shattering glass. Because the fourth wall is made of glass. Or maybe paper, since this is a book, but that’s opaque, not transparent, so you can’t watch through it. So... glass. Even though it’s the wrong medium. And no, that’s not medium as in psychic. Or the size between small and large. It’s medium as in format. The Narrator then dropped the hammer and reached through the hole. It grabbed you (the Reader) by the neck. Well, maybe you. Unless it wasn’t. Which is more likely, so it probably wasn’t you. Unless it was. After choking you (Not you specifically. Unless it was.) half to death, the Narrator stepped through to your side of the fourth wall. “Oh yeah, forgot to demonstrate defenestration,” the Narrator muttered. “Now what would make a good demonstration?” It looked around. “That’ll do.” It picked up your bed and carried it over to the window. Then it threw it. Out the window. That’s what defenestration means. Throwing things out the window. It has nothing to do with... er... removing parts of the body, you dirty-minded individual. The Author would like to remind you that if you are still reading, this is not happening to you. It’s happening to someone else. And that that comment about being a dirty-minded individual was directed towards the dirty-minded individuals reading this, not the clean minded person who may or may not be you. Oh, and sorry if you just lost a bed. [and a line from another of my stories that I just had to reuse] Back to the thing mistakenly referred to as a plot. [...] Rati: "Why is there a sunroom in the middle of a building?" [while talking to a vampiric clothes dryer (yes, you read that right)] “How can you tell the difference between left socks and right socks?” Rati asked. “Left socks smell like caramel,” the clothes dryer explained. “And what do right socks smell like?” “Socks.” [after escaping a bright green ninja cow via teleporting; BTW, Rati and Elure are sharing a body] “Where are we?” Ralure asked, looking around. “Uh... in the sky?” the Narrator replied. In the sky _is_ a distant location, by the way. Just not for long. Ralure (both parts) started screaming as they fell towards the ground. Rati also subconsciously attempted to move muscles that Elure’s body did not actually have. The Narrator grabbed xir before xe fell too far and teleported to a less dangerous location. --- “That was terrifying,” Ralure muttered once they were back on solid ground. Well, maybe not ground. Something solid, anyway. “Now, where are we _this_ time?” xe asked. “What’s the name of the tallest structure in Bohr?” the Narrator replied. “Why?” “No reason,” the Narrator said, teleporting again. [late at night; by the way, Zane and the Narrator are able to read minds] ‘Yawn,’ Zane yawned redundantly. “You don’t need to say things like that, Zane,” the Narrator sighed. “Especially not when it sounds like it’s from the Department of Redundancy Department.” “What did he say?” Elure asked. “He said ‘yawn’. Ryhuul thinks he’s trying to drop hints.” “Why is that redundant?” “He was yawning at the time.” “How do you know?” “Ryhuul is a Narrator. Narrators can see how someone speaks.” Rati yawned. Elure yawned. The Narrator managed to resist the yawn. The Reader yawned. Probably you. Unless it wasn’t. The Narrator wondered how much longer the Fourth Wall would last. Elure yawned again. Zane yawned again. Without adding his own narration this time. “Can we go to bed now?” Rati said, yawning. “Fine.” "Trust me, I'm a prophet." [this one's more of a running gag] "There are no cows on this planet." [Elure talking to herself while Rati is flying around; just after they had a fight] “I wish I could join him. Wait, what am I saying? I wish he ends up being hit by an inexplicable shovel and falling to his death.” Fri, 24 Feb 2012 19:30:04 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1167247 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1167247 thedragongirl Probably not my best line but i thought it was funny. Probably makes more sense in the whole paragraph... So my mfc goes to this awesome cave with multicolored crystals on the ceiling shining down onto the cave and lake and as she is a very sarcastic individual sooo... "The waters sparkled with rainbow colors, making the cave a great prospect for a hippie commune or a skittles commercial." Sat, 25 Feb 2012 00:55:41 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1168061 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=2#forum_thread_comment_1168061 allwritemel Well this made it all the way to the publishers and 4 lots later nobody had alerted me! I don't know where my brain was when I wrote: "A mother goose and a load of stuffed feathers, who could be afraid of that?!" You, er, can't have stuffed feathers, they stuff things! I've got loads more because I'm having to write at a terrific speed but I'll come back and post some more later if that's OK. Sun, 11 Mar 2012 16:58:58 +0100 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1204956 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1204956 VGJekyll A fairy appears out of nowhere to pluck an elfcup (sort of moss growing on one of the main leads's arms as result of a curse). Tommy stared startled at it. 'What the fuck-?' The fairy stilled its movements and then very slowly moved its arms in a quasi-hypnotising way. 'I'm just a figment of your imagination,' it spoke in a sing-song voice. It then dissapeared with a soft plop. Tommy whirled around to face Eve. 'What the hell was that!" he asked her incredulous. Eve slowly shrugged. 'Don't ask me. It was a figment of your imagination, not mine.' Tue, 03 Apr 2012 16:07:59 +0200 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1258952 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1258952 Ell-chan "You talk in your sleep when you sleep on school books. You stopped when I removed the books from you face, though.." I don't even remember writing it... Wed, 18 Apr 2012 10:57:09 +0200 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1298681 http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums/this-is-going-better-than-i-d-hoped/threads/28283?page=3#forum_thread_comment_1298681