Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
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Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
My MC is a 13-year-old girl who has just discovered that the mean girls at her school have created a hate blog in her honor. Now for the plot doctoring part: I need some flavor text for the blog posts! I've been trying to come up with some of the blog comments on my own, but I could sure use some help getting the sound of it right, and getting the variety you only get with lots of people "posting".
If you can channel your inner troll, I'd very much appreciate it if you could write a brief bit trashing this girl, in your poorest internet-13-year-old grammar. The website is called Whale Watching (because my MC is obese) and the comments can insult her for any reason you'd like. The mean girls have given my MC the nickname "Orca" for the blog and do not use any of their "real" names.
Thanks in advance for your help and attention!
Re: Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
Maybe you could actually read some teen blogs. A few of our youth keep them on Xanga. You'd have to sort through to find the mean ones, but I am sure they're there.
Re: Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
Thanks, I'll check that out if I need some more flavor text. I was able to get some help on the Plot Doctoring forum as well, so I think I'm good to go.
If I've learned anything, it's that it's remarkably hard to write trollish text deliberately - probably was the hardest part of my novel to write so far!
Re: Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
Maybe you could get some inspiration for "Yo mama so fat" jokes. Just replace "yo mama" with "Orca" such as
Orca is so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"
Maybe include a Moby Dick reference and "man the harpoons".
Wow, being mean in harder than I thought
Re: Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
Read the book "Blubber" by Judy Blume, one of my personal favourites growing up, for good ideas. They actual reference a fat character as a whale frequently (hence the name Blubber, as in 'Whale Blubber'). Also, it's a really good read. My friend who is repulsed by the idea of touching books loved it and re-read it heaps.
Aside from that, I can offer one:
"Orca's so fat, I heard they had to stitch x number of tops together to fit her size!"
Re: Hate Mail for a Hateful Blog
If the hate mail blog about me hadn't been shut down and deleted by its creators, I would have linked you to that :P. The only comment that I really remember was something about it Goldie Hawn, Danny DeVito got together and had a kid, it'd be me, 'cause I'm short, kinda chubby, blonde at the time and, apparently, ugly.
How about this? Orca's so fat that when her cell goes off, people think she's backing up.