cstephen
Synopsis
This memoir attempts to provide a glimpse into life as a color blind individual. My goal is to be all-encompassing by describing perceptions, feelings, struggles, workarounds, and even touching on social and philosophical issues from time to time.
Excerpt
"What colors can't you see?" It's a question I am often asked, and as straightforward as it sounds, I find it nearly impossible to give a truthful answer. Most of the time I reflexively answer with just "purple". This invariably leads to more questions like "But aren't you red/green color blind?" or worse yet, the person with whom I'm talking will get a twinkle in their eye, scan the room for a few seconds, point to something that appears blue, and ask "What color is that?" It's the same old routine. Some questions are more thoughtful than others, but they are all based on the same basic misconception - that my vision is essentially the same as theirs, sans a color or two. My flippant "purple" remark feeds their myth with fresh fodder for the sake of brevity, then we joke about it for a bit and go on our separate ways feeling as though the matter has been resolved. If you could surgically remove purple from normal vision, that's what I see. Somehow my answer seems more misleading than the question itself. I know there's more to it than that, but it would take far too long to explain.
When asked "What color is that?" seconds after admitting I'm unable to see the color purple, my response is typically along the lines of "That's purple." Their next question, as if reading from the same tired script, is "But I thought you couldn't see purple?" Let's take a moment to pause and reflect. What is it that I'm being asked exactly? They've obviously searched the room for something that's purple. They always do this. It's not hard to guess what they're up to. Even if I hadn't noticed the mischievous look sweep their face, and even if I hadn't been through this drill a million times before, I'm still left knowing what I would do if I were in their shoes. I would do exactly what they are doing. I have trouble seeing certain colors, but it doesn't mean I've lost the power of reason. I'm still a person after all.
I can't hold it against them. They are people too, just expressing their curiosity with the first thoughts that come to mind. I enjoy it when people take a genuine interest in color blindness. It's not that they're trying to be rude. I wish more people were this curious. But it seems like everyone has a color blind father, uncle, or grandfather. Roughly 10% of American males are said to be afflicted, and we all know someone. Between the colorful stories about their uncle's mixups or cousin's faux pas, maybe there's little left for people to be curious about. Everybody is an expert by now. Meanwhile, with 28 years of color blind experience under my belt, my curiosity could not be greater. It may have all started with silly stories of weird childhood artwork or a failure to match clothes properly, but now that I'm 28 years in, my condition has taken on dimensions I never would have imagined.
