iamnoimpact
Synopsis
boy always in the way.
man never making the same mistake.
Excerpt
I hadn’t been soft and full of things to speak like many of the girls had always been. but I felt just like them. the way they didn’t want to touch and punish things put before them. I climbed too high on a piece of wooden playground once and got a splinter that stuck under my skin and shouted back at me with a dark black gaze. I never wanted that, never wanted what the boys wanted. height and power and whatever it is they were always charging for. I wanted to talk the way the girls did, about nothing, about home and people in their lives who weren’t terrifying. when I went and sat with them I didn’t say hello but I added what would seem like the kind of thing they would want to hear. at least the kind of things they’d been saying all along. with their three voices, they did something where it felt like they spoke for millions: “get away, you’re a boy” they razored. I felt bats flying everywhere and spiders in my lungs. I looked for someone to give me help and there was no one there.
