In other words, my life has been an absolute rut for years, and I must get out of it. In many ways, I have no choice; my roomate's moving out, so I'll have to find a new one or a new place or something. And work is slowly driving me mad; I have concluded that I can no longer follow the process made up to this date on this subject. In other words, it's new job time. And between the two, my goal is to find some semblance of a romantic life, or at least a sense of new friendship and community. That's a tall order, but I have a year, and isn't that the point?
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56,442 / 50,000
Dec 31, 2007 - 22 54
I wish you luck. That's what I feel like doing sometimes, just starting over somewhere. Ruts are rather annoying, and you need motivation to get out of them. And motivation is what I lack when I'm in a rut lol.
I know you can do it though :) A year is a long time if you spend it right.
50,372 / 50,000
Jan 1, 2008 - 14 27
good luck, i really hope you have good luck with that.
4,468 / 50,000
Jan 2, 2008 - 04 27
Instead of "This Must End," how about ... "This Must Begin"?
51,609 / 50,000
Jan 2, 2008 - 12 52
Yeah, I think I've got similar issues to yours here...
50,244 / 50,000
Jan 2, 2008 - 13 22
I wish you the best of luck. I'm trying to get out of rut too - mine just involves getting over fear and learning to stand on my own feet and grow up.
58,019 / 50,000
Jan 4, 2008 - 22 28
Seth--I'm there now, doing that, and trying to exchange the t-shirt for something I really want. ( :
Had a chat with a minister, with whom I discussed my own frustration, and she said that in her experience, that most of the changes she has seen people make have been precipitated by their frustration level just getting too much to handle. In other words, sometimes, it's just gotta hurt this bad to get you to do something. I agree, because I know that's been true for me.
But, don't despair. It might help you, as it's helped me, to remember that the things on your list are eminently do-able, that, in fact, tons of people are doing these things every day. It's also helped me, too, to examine my thinking, and to begin to root out the naysaying-type ideas that don't serve my goals. I'm surprised by the number of times in a day I've found myself thinking "I can't do that, because..." I haven't been able to change this thinking overnight, but it's been interesting to see how my mindset might be getting in the way of what I really want.
Good luck, and I hope you keep us all posted as to how you are doing.
Katherine
a/k/a Hollywood Kate
50,150 / 50,000
Jan 7, 2008 - 09 45
I'm probably the "old person" responding to this thread, but I too feel completely mired in a rut. I have always given my job 110%. But I want to be more than my job. And my friends -- most of whom I've known for 20+ years -- seem to be adding to my restlessness. I feel as though we are all bogged down with life's trivialities. Too much criticizing, gossiping, second-guessing. I've set several goals for myself, including 1) spending time with those people who make me feel better, not worse; and 2) doing things that make ME happy, instead of just going with the flow all the time. Finishing the NaNoWriMo challenge was a start. All goals are doable if we stay focused. Good luck to you. If you're like me, just having a plan for change makes you feel better already.
1,097 / 50,000
Jan 7, 2008 - 18 35
you can do it. i know because i did it last year. i had a job that had transformed from a dream job to a nightmare, a house i loved but with a mortgage payment that was killing me, and was so stressed out i actually wound up in the hospital for a week and out of work for a month. talk about a wakeup call. during those weeks off i realized that something had to give. in my case, it was the job and the house. june 1 i started looking for a job, october 9 i put the house on the market (i had a lot of staging and small improvements to do). it was unbelievably stressful and hard, but i started my new job on october 28 and moved into my much more sensible apartment christmas week. the house closed officially on friday and i am finally free. i managed to do it all in 6 months (and in sketchy health), so imagine what you can accomplish in 12!
21,051 / 50,000
Jan 7, 2008 - 18 56
Have you heard the old saying...
The only difference between a rut and a grave... is in their dimensions.
Make an action plan. Write down exactly what you need to do to move toward your goal. Don't just say "Find Romance." Say exactly what you are going to do to get yourself out there meeting people. Don't say "Get a New Job." Say exactly what steps are need to begin the search and land the new position.
Exciting times lie ahead, my friend. Good luck!