Right then. The challenge for the Week 1 meeting (on friday 6th, at The George).
The challenge is this: to include somewhere in you writings a bodily fluid of some kind. This could be anything from tears or sweat, to the erm... other stuff. Just work it into your novel somehow!
You have until 11am on friday 6th to post your excerpt on this thread- and rememebr it can be anything from a sentence to a paragraph... but no longer please, my attention span it not that... ooh, squirrel!
This is just a bit of fun, and there will be a prize of course, but please don't let this get you off-track if you're on a roll. It's just meant to liven things up for those that are getting stuck, or just want a bit of silliness.
Love you all,
MB
PS. please remember that this is a kids-friendly forum, so if you're writing dirty stuff, please send it to me by NaNo message thingy instead of posting it up here! You could seriously dammage some of our more sensitive members.. by which I mean SheBit. She's so lame...
----------
37,841 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 05 32
Hi MooseBiscuit,
sorry I won't be there for the meeting, but thought I might add my scribble to the challenge- hope you'll like it. (The rest of the prolog is on my NoIn site)
With wordy greetings
Susanne
"...for her there would never be anything normal, anything usual or ordinary, not here.
Nevertheless Bre trudged through the sodden undergrowth. Only a short while later she reached the clearing, panting with exhaustion, but relieved. Cracks from the heavy laden branches let her spin around in terror, but she couldn't see anyone, no movement behind the stumps of fallen giants or thinning shrubs. She turned back, just in time to evade a meter of rotten branch-wood hitting her squarely on the head. The dull thud emanating from her shoulder resonated into every tip of her hair and she felt her arms and hands going numb. Together with herself Bre felt her baby sliding to the ground, the rain falling on her face and neck. Tears blurred her vision as she observed a shrouded figure releasing herself from a tree trunk from across the clearing, slowly walking towards Bre and her daughter."
34,131 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 06 50
By a fairly amazing coincidence, I had written this excerpt a scant minute before reading about this challenge. It is only a peripheral reference to a body fluid, but I believe that it qualifies. I'm only sorry that the excerpt's only distinguishing feature is it's dullness, but it is designed to introduce the reader to the character's family in short order. There are/will be better bits in my novel. Almost certainly.
Cathy
“How are the boys?”
“Oh, fine, fine. Tommy’s always getting into trouble at school for daydreaming, Lee’s going to be a professional footballer but without all the hugging and spitting because apparently both are gross. Tea?“ she asked, holding up a fat brown teapot with a chipped spout. Alice nodded.
38,059 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 11 53
Ah... loving it all! Two very different styles. Any more out there?
Oh, and did we mention that the prizes will be relevant to the challenges?
Still sure you want to win?
Teehee...
MB
35,451 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 13 36
My protagonist was just in the right mood for crying anyhow, although I'm slightly concerned at her mood swings from angry to self-pitying, but hey...
Sorry if it is a little bit long. I'm not sure how much sense it'll make either without the rest of the background, but then, you don't know what happened twelve years ago in my story anyway at this point. I'm sure you coud sort of guess.
No more waffling on though, I need to get back to writing, seeing as I'm behind already. Oh, and she is talking about the trees in the forest she is in at night time at the beginning, if you were wondering.
'They spooked me too. I may have been passionate, I may have been wronged, I may have been headstrong, I may have been a widow, but I was still a seventeen year old girl, who found herself in the cold and the dark, with no-one to hug her and tell her it was going to be alright. I had just lost the only person who had ever been there to hug me since I was five. Surely I couldn’t be blamed for letting a few tears leak through my eyelashes. I wanted my freedom, yes, but more than anything, I wanted my life back, whole and un-broken. I wanted to be the little, innocent Adalet Tavor I had been twelve years ago, before any of this had happened. But she was gone and had been gone for a long time. '
----------Everyone has an inner geek. Mine is just a bit less 'inner'.
36,153 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 14 23
I have a lovely character, full of all manner of oozy bits, and I wrote this bit just for him!!
"There is nothing he can do. In two steps, he is in the cold embrace of the shadows, and the muzzle of my gun is pressed against his fore head. He gasps that rasping little gasp of his as his eyes shoot up, meeting mine and widening in terror. He goes cross eyed for a second, the watery pupils straining to open themselves up wide enough to focus on the shining barrel of the gun at his head. Then his focus shifts back to me. All this time, his chest has been heaving into gear to try and draw enough hoarse breath to scream, but I think he knows better. I move my hand up to cover his mouth just in case, but his eyes snap to the sudden movement, pupils still trying to deal with the sudden darkness and surge of chemicals in his body, and he gulps the cry back down. I smile coldly at him and lower my hand again. He winces, and quickly draws his hands up above his head. Sweat pours off his greasy fore head where the gun has been pressed against his pock marked skin and he moves his hand to wipe it out of his eyes. I jab him a little harder; the hand returns to the back of his head like a shot as he takes a sharp intake of breath."
I'm not sure if eye ball juice counts as a bodily fluid, i guess it must. any way, i thought it was disgusting enough to make it worth while ^.^
Also, sorry its quite so long. I know you said to keep it short, but my attention span wasn't long enough to edit ...ooh, squirrel!
----------If you travel faster than the speed of light, do you get where your going, and see your self comming?
44,607 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 15 40
So far I have blood, sweat, and tears (hey, I can make a band...) Three of my four main characters are bleeding somehow, and the one that isn't just got thrown out of a second storey window...
----------I pick... blood:
“Christ,” Valentine said, taking Bishop’s blood soaked hand away and tearing his shirt to look at the wound which continued to bleed a tiny waterfall of blood.
44,002 / 50,000
Nov 2, 2009 - 16 20
Its a bit of a case of 'blink and you miss it' but there is blood in here. Honest there is.
"A harsh boot to the side knocked whatever air remained out of his pierced lungs and forced him onto his back. His vision was beginning to cloud over but he could still make out the merrily burning lantern of the gatehouse only a few feet back from where he lay. He had been so close...The same boot that kicked him over rested on his chest, pinning him to the floor. Kit really didn’t consider it terribly necessary. He didn’t think he could have moved anyway. He didn’t have the strength left to keep his eyes open. The bloody sword appeared in his failing vision, point hovering higher up on his chest, where the stain had yet to spread. A thick red drop slid off to begin soaking into the fabric."
I don't think I'm going to be getting any body fluids in a more interesting fashion. The only other one I can think of that might show up are tears.
----------Compassion hinders my creativity.
32,134 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 03 35
This is a little inexplicable out of context. To be honest, it's inexplicable in context, the point is that my leading lady is a little bit...inexplicable. Still...you got a lot of words out of me, and apparently some bodily fluids.
And moose, knowing what you do for a living, I am genuinely worried about the prize now.
Here goes:
'Well, I wouldn't know about that.' Age was confused to say the least.
'But you're lettting him shit all over the place. Covering your institution in a thin layer of liquid excrement.' She pulled a pouch from her pocket and started to roll a cigarette. 'Along with the rest of the world.'
'Well.' Age looked hurt. And the woman's eyebrows furrowed.
'Don't get me wrong, you clearly run a very clean establishment; I was only talking about metaphorical slurry.' The words came out shyly mumbled, in contrast to the harsh clipped tones of her abstract feminist rant.
'I do try.' Age still felt a flush of pride through his bewilderment.
--------
This was unlike the story
it was written to be
I was riding its back
when it used to ride me
- Joanna Newsom - Peach, Plum, Pear
6,501 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 04 28
Short & sweet (kind of):
What? How the Hell should I know why that little cry-baby pussy chased me. I’m a glam rocker; I can barely remember what happened last week. Why don’t you go ask Sooki? She’s good with that sh*t. I need to take a leak, anyway. After last night I’m gonna be pissing Jack for a month.
23,279 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 04 50
Won't be there Friday either but here goes nothin!
The train hasn’t even reached St.Leonards – Warrior Square and I’ve started to go mad. Not mad, as in ranting and raving in a foul temper, but mad. I thought I was going insane or had somehow developed X-Ray vision. Now that could have benefits, I thought, but the people were developing the translucent look as fast as their clothing. I looked around the rest of the train, or what I could see of it from where I was sitting and it was all fine. The seats, walls, floor, emergency pull-cord, windows and everything else that belonged to the train were solid, full of colour and intact. It was the people that were phasing out, along with their clothing and anything else they were holding/eating/reading (delete where appropriate).
----------We were slowing down as we approached Warrior Square and I closed my eyes to think. I must be hallucinating. It’s the only explanation. The coffee! Yes, the coffee! I had a cup of Costa’s finest on the platform and someone has laced it with mushrooms. That has to be it. Probably accounts for the headache too. The words in my head accepted the explanation but I knew that it was an unlikely scenario. Anyone working in a branch of Costa Coffee in Hastings couldn’t afford the purchase of Magic Mushrooms and if they could, they wouldn’t give them away to a passing stranger. No, there had to be a better explanation. I opened my eyes again.
The people outside in the rain, waiting for the train to stop at Warrior Square were also shimmering into opacity. It also appeared that everything they were wearing or carrying was disappearing at a very slow and almost casual rate. Something had definitely disagreed with me from the previous night’s dinner party.
I concentrated my gaze back to the lady opposite and now the picture of Claudia Schiffer on the front cover of her magazine was mixed in with her own face and I could even see a rivulet of something dripping from her left nostril. I hoped it was an errant raindrop.
It's not the winning or losing...it's the taking apart that matters.
20,055 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 07 52
I realised out of context the first sentence sounded slightly unsavoury, but it is about someone who was ill and sweaty, not y'know.. and sweaty.
"He never ever thought of her in bed, pale and sweating and moaning, seeing her that once in her nightdress crawling on the landing, looking for something that wasn’t there. He had even almost forgotten her face when she was ill, just remembered that same time with her eyes glowing in the semi-darkness, big and wild like a fox’s. And then their mother, scooping her up like a featherless bird, all bones and skin and fluttering heart and putting her back in that room with that smell. "
Lucy
xxx
42,650 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 09 40
I looked down at my own plate, cleared and wiped with bread. I had a hearty appetite and the sea air and Dubonnet had enhanced it. My head started to swim and I leaned back onto the blanquettes where we were sitting. The mother and the man were also smoking Gauloise and pouring over a map, arguing with each other in clipped tones. The brother had gone to sleep on the aunt’s lap. Suddenly the man rose to his feet ‘Last Carsey for a while gang’ he announced. ‘I suggest we all make use of it’. He farted loudly and walked off through a small door at the back of the bar.
The mother looked at me levelly ‘It’ll be a croucher love’ she said ‘Brace yourself’. One by one we initiated ourselves into this new experience.
21,224 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 09 51
Are animals allowed? if so I had written this today before I read your challange:
A howl from the kitchen brought her head up. Pandora was angry. She’d forgotten to leave the window open in the kitchen this morning and the Siamese was letting her know that the pool of pee on the kitchen rug was Alana’s fault entirely.
----------“Oh, Pandy. I’m sorry”. Alana stroked the stiff back and ramrod tail as the cat made figures of eight around her legs.
2008 - The Good Girl
2009 - Cry Baby
32,228 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 14 34
Does vomit count?
If necessary, I can give one of my characters food poisoning... [evil grin]
----------"I never promised anybody a good time. I'm an artist, not a philanthropist." -- God.
5,163 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 01 12
Unintentionally done already a few times. I'll pick the safest one though:
"It was one of many small little insecurities she had to deal with ever since her dad left them. The idea of it not being his fault was something she tried to tell herself whenever she thought about it, but there was always that niggling little voice that said otherwise like that scab you can't help but pick even though it'll hurt you or that mouth ulcer you can't help but tongue at whenever even though it'll only lengthen the amount of time it'll take to heal. That idea that it was entirely his fault, that he made it happen and should be in hell burning for eternity for how they left Clare and her mother, let alone any other crimes against humanity he's committed. Clare rubbed her right eye a bit and made her way to her room with a drink, telling her mother she was revising. She couldn't bare to lie to her, but just chose to not say anything about why her eyes seemed a bit red or wet. It'd be best, probably, just to leave her out of any reminders of her ex-husband.
After what felt like two hours of crying, and five minutes of sleep (and was probably, in truth, the other way around), she settled down and begun to revise as hard as she could on English."
38,059 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 04 08
Vomit is fine.
Cats are fine.
Cat vomit is also fine.
Keep 'em coming!
What? No! Eww... that's not what I meant at all... horrid, dirt people.
MB
44,607 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 04 24
This is making me think of terrible, awful puns about "discharges"... Of which I am doing the hospital-paperwork sort at the moment... I want to say that the thought is all that's keeping me sane at the moment, but that would be lieing... It is just adding to the insanity :D
----------30,063 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 05 24
Just finished for today, ending with the first sex scene. Which concludes:
"and then we were all sweaty and done.
----------‘Shall we get you that cab, then?’ he asked."
www.helenjbeal.com
37,667 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 11 37
After you posted the challenge i found all my characters started bleeding all over the place. And we all know i'll be the one left to clean up the mess... tsk tsk.
Here's mine:
I wrenched the blade from her convulsing body and turned to the remaining three."
V
30,332 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 11 44
"His pristine white room was smeared all over with blood, his bed sheets too were stained with dried red puddles, and his sheet was thrown over a shape on the side of his bed. "
----------If a picture is worth 1000 words, would 50 pictures win NaNaWriMo?
38,146 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 16 09
Robin peered through the glass, using his hands to shield himself from the reflective glare on the windows. We all saw the blood on his hand.
“You alright?” Jay asked.
“Yeah, just looking for her bag,” Robin said.
“You’re bleeding.”
“Probably it’s blood, not mine.”
Dr. Dave looked closely “Some yes, but I can see a couple of gashes. You did just punch a dog in the mouth.”
42,650 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 01 58
I love that !!!
52,271 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 05 13
I've had my character kill several people with weapons but not gone into much detail about the... details. Well, unless you count an evil knight falling to the ground having been stabbed in the gut with a dagger and had his head caved in with a nunchaku.
She's going to kill someone else, soon, though, so I'll see what I can do for tomorrow.
----------Kung fu changed my life
25,001 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 05 56
Oh, come on, that was easy! Not that I'm complaining- as you can see, anything that ramps my wordcount up a bit at this point is a very good thing.
Mark looked up, and caught a cloud of smoke in the face. “I- jesus- I thought my problem was I was too slow.”
----------“You have a lot of problems, kid.”
“And you're not Humphrey Bogart.”
“Well, neither are you, shortarse. You're more the Peter Lorie type.” Rita stubbed out her cigarette on the head of a bronzed pigeon and spat, with deadeye aim, into the birdbath. “Cheer up. You can get another job. Ever thought about geology? Rocks don't care if their chips are cold.”
52,271 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 09 05
OK, this is gruesome even by my own standards. *ha-hem...*
Bodies lay everywhere, most covered in thick blood, some oozing from the throat still, others with blood trickling from their guts or severed legs and arms. It was a mess. As she picked her way through the carnage, carefully avoiding stepping on anyone, she could smell the unmistakable stench of death and she looked around the battlefield for anything that held any clues at all about what these men had been fighting over. It was not easy. All there seemed to be were things the men had carried on their persons: knives, daggers, gold rings, money bags. Mirror even found a false eye on the ground next to a body with a black, bloody socket where the eye once was.
She looked up at the brightening sky. Vultures circled high above, some coming down to settle on the bloody corpses and did not let Mirror’s presence distract them from their gruesome meal. As they tucked in heartily, the sounds of ripping flesh made Mirror’s skin crawl and she could not stay any longer. But as she looked up again, she saw there was a green tinge to the sky, not so very different from the green of the moon in her dream. Then she remembered another dream she had had. The figure standing next to a freshly dead corpse, looking towards the horizon. But that was not all. She remembered now something which had escaped her when she had first woken up from that dream: the figure standing next to the corpse had been holding something in his hand. It had dangled at his side, limp and lifeless. Lifeless? Mirror remembered what it was, then, and she ran over to a shallow stream, bent over and threw up.
----------Kung fu changed my life
42,313 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 09 34
So, I had a bodily fluids line on about the second page of my NaNo, but I've written another one since I hospitalised one of my characters, and managed to get in three-in-one...
He tested the samples of blood, urine and vomit carefully, ensuring that everything was done exactly right, and that all the equipment was functioning correctly. He tested the samples a second time, just to make sure. With the full set of print outs in his hand, the doctor was baffled.
2006 - Dance of the White Smoke: 51,191 words
2007 - The Wyching Hour: 50,100 words
2008 - Lost In Thought: 35,504 words
2009 - Queueing For Purgatory: ?
The Tsp as in teaspoon.
23,279 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 13 27
I've got a late one in from what I just writ! (yeah, loving my grammage) ;)
Sorry about the long one earlier but I didn;t read the rules regarding your short attention span....ohh, armadillo! Anyway, here it is (apologies for no gore so far):
The train stopped just a few minutes after Battle and any mistaken thoughts about me dreaming the whole story up and that I would awake in a short while, sweating Merlot, went out of the window as fast as a cat that had missed the litter tray.
Sorry I can't be there but transport from Hastings and cash flow from pocket can be a pain sometimes.
----------It's not the winning or losing...it's the taking apart that matters.
32,228 / 50,000
Nov 5, 2009 - 13 53
I really wanted to post the whole chapter... but given your one paragraph limit, here's my entry. (Ignore the first paragraph, the second paragraph is my entry. [Is that cheating? They are both short anyway, and the first is necessary context ;-) ]
“Sorry, got tied up,” Emma said. She had been hurrying, and was glowing a bit. “The clocktower? So we can catch the number 7 to Hove Station.”
Given all the gore, pus and excreta in the other entries, which I couldn't compete with, I thought I'd go for the "understated effusions" medal, rather than the main prize.
Chro.
----------"I never promised anybody a good time. I'm an artist, not a philanthropist." -- God.
38,059 / 50,000
Nov 6, 2009 - 05 15
Right then folks! The entries are in, they are printed, and they will be read!
See you tonight for prizes, another quiz, and some beer :D
xx MB
38,059 / 50,000
Nov 6, 2009 - 17 00
And the winner is... squidandkitten yaay!
We hope she likes her prize :D