Excerpt: Harvard Bound

"Rejection?" Henry asked.

Mark skimmed the letter briefly and then let his arm drop to his side, his hand crumpling the paper slightly, trying and failing to be casual about it.

Mark stared over his buddy's shoulder, his voice flat. "Acceptance."

"Well, that's good," Heny replied weakly. He knew where Mark's lack of enthusiasm came from. Being accepted into college did not mean Mark would be able to go to college. He got the peanut butter out of the cupboard over the dishwasher and then turned and got out two plates from the next cupboard, laying out the items on the island countertop for both boys' use. "Still no scholarship, then? Keep reading. Maybe they mention wor study further down or something."

"Ineligible," Mark countered, waving the acceptance letter in Henry's general direction in a manner that did not make it possible for Henry to read it himself and confirm the claim. "I am ineligible for a Pell grant, work study, scholarship by need, and scholarship by merit. I can take out a big ass loan if I want! I'm quite free to owe a hundred thousand dollars by the time I graduate, if I can convince Sallie Mae I'm good for it."

"At least you'd get a degree that way," Henry pointed out. The toaster oven finished its cycle with a cheerful ding, and Henry opened the door and gingerly retrieved four bagel halves with his fingertips, sliding them onto the countertop, blowing at his fingers, and then carefully flipping two halves onto each waiting plate. He got two knives out of the silverware drawer and handed one to Mark.

"I don't want peanut butter, thanks," Mark said. "Got any butter?"

"Uh, yeah. There's margarine in the fridge. You've been here often enough. Help yourself already."

"I feel funny opening somebody else's fridge," Mark sighed, probably for the thousandth time.

"This isn't someone else's house. Ih'h hine," Henry admonished his friend, interrupting himself with a big bite of bagel and peanut butter.

"Well," said Mark, "I'm not you. Maybe you haven't noticed that yet, but oddly enough, I'm a completely different person. God, I wish I were you. I'd go to Harvard on a full scholarship in an instant."

"And I'd go to college on nothing but loans and a night job," Henry retorted. "Why won't you consider this one?"

Because," said Mark dramatically, pinching the letter at the top with with both hands and displaying it so that Henry could read the letterhead, "it's Liberty University!"

"Yeesh," Henry said sympathetically. After another bite of bagel and peanut butter, he asked, "Wait, what's wrong with Liberty U again?"

Mark grabbed his bagel and knife and spread himself a gob of peanut butter. "Well, let's see. In biology class you learn that the earth is 6000 years old. In anthropology class you learn that African culture began with the arrival of Christian missionaries. In economics you learn that Jesus rewards capitalists with yachts and BMWs and a fourth home on the French Riviera."

Henry shrugged. "So, just skip the most ridiculous courses."

"Then what am I paying a hundred thousand dollars for?! A degree in automotive repair? Or maybe I'll major in agriculture. Then I'll only have to endure a million references to bountiful harvests and shepherding my flock. And the occasional reminder that livestock breeding is NOT evolution."

"Why'd you apply in the first place?" Henry asked. He knew the answer to this question already.