Excerpt: Three Dollars

Note to self, do not shop on the day before a major religious holiday... people have a tendency to behave in a less than christian manner.

On Saturday afternoon I made the mistake of heading out to the grocery store to pick up supplies for dinner on Sunday, like the fifty-thousand other people all fighting for parking spaces. As I meandered up and down the rows hoping for a spot within a one mile radius, I diligently used my turn signals and obeyed traffic laws and common courtesy both. As I was at the end of a one way row waiting to turn left across two-way traffic I was abruptly passed on my left by a blue RAV 4, I was startled and I honked (something I NEVER do). Much to my surprise the driver stopped his car in the middle of the street and proceeded to GET OUT and stomp toward me cursing and waving his hands. I rolled my window down and asked what the point of his passing me was when we were headed the same direction, but abruptly stopped talking when he POUNDED both fists on my hood and called me a stupid bitch. I, and everyone around me, was completely shocked. Hello? I honked my horn. The man had passed me on a one lane, one way parking lot row by cutting through the handicapped parking space and then he acted like I had rear ended him or something.

I should have realized at that moment it was time to go home and have a frozen pizza for dinner. But no! I persevered. I went in with my handy dandy list and headed through the produce section picking up miscellaneous items (none of which were actually on my list of course) and then made my way to the sea food counter as I had a whim for crab legs. Being the polite person I am, I parked my cart in front of a potato display behind me while I left the aisle in front of the seafood counter clear for others to shop. I waited my turn and made my order from the nice boy behind the counter and after he handed me the first of my neatly wrapped packages I turned to place it in my cart, WHICH WAS GONE! Someone had stolen my partly filled basket AND my shopping list which I had left on the child seat. Thank goodness I had been smart enough to put my purse on my shoulder.