Excerpt: Moving Forward

“Dr. House,” Williams said, announcing her arrival in House’s office.
“My god, woman,” House said. “Did Cuddy specifically tell you to stalk me? Because you’re doing an excellent job at that.”
“You just draw a lot of attention to yourself,” she said. “I came here to remind you that you have clinic hours to fulfill that you’ve been falling behind on. And I added a few more.”
“Is that for a particular reason or just on general principle?”
“For not getting out of the MRI when I told you to scram. Dr. Wilson’s been penalized as well,” Williams said.
“Very good,” House said. “Except for that part where I don’t show up for my hours.”
Williams placed her hands on her hips and smiled in self-satisfaction. “I saw that you’ve just handed off your case to Dr. Wilson, so that means you’re free tomorrow for clinic. All day. In fact, I’ve revoked your authorization for anything that doesn’t have to do with the clinic for the next few days.”
“That’s going to suck for the patients who come with mysterious, incurable illnesses.”
“The one patient,” Williams corrected. “And I’m not stupid. If something comes up, I’ll let you handle a case — after I’ve reviewed it to make sure you’re not making it up. Having administrative powers has its perks.”
House looked at with some amusement. “You’re very frustrating.”
“That’s my job,” Williams said. She began to leave.
“You’re gunning to be Cuddy’s successor, aren’t you?” House asked.
“Do you have a point?”
“Just that you’re making a lot of assumptions in your otherwise extremely careful calculations,” House said. “What makes you think Cuddy’s going to be leaving any time soon? Because I somehow doubt you intend to wait around for too long.”
“It’s not definite, no,” Williams said. “But she’s having a baby and she’s going to want to spend time with it.”
“If I’m not mistaken, you have a few kids yourself. What makes you special?”
“I had mine years ago,” she said. “And they have a great stay-at-home dad. I’m in the perfect position for the job.” It was creepy; Williams reminded House a bit of Amber, especially just now. “I’d appreciate if you didn’t try sabotage me. Or Cuddy.”
“Why would I ever do such a thing?” House asked.
“Clinic. All day tomorrow,” Williams said, and she left.
Williams reminded House quite a bit of Amber. Is this what she would have been like in ten years’ time? Married, with kids, head of a department and working her way towards running an entire hospital? And Wilson a stay-at-home dad. House couldn’t help but be amused by the image, although there was plenty of truth to it. Wilson with a kid. That’s probably what the man needed, a miniature version of himself built expressly for being needy.
Not that that would be happening any time soon. Or ever, really. If he hadn’t managed to knock up one of the multitude of women he’s been involved with over the years, then he’s probably shooting blanks.
“I don’t know why it’s any of your concern.”
“Here we go again,” House said.
“I mean,” Amber said, plopping down in the seat across from House, “you didn’t want Wilson to date me. You don’t want Wilson to date anyone. And now you’re thinking about his sperm count. Did you ever consider that maybe the way you act isn’t exactly normal for a friendship?”
“I am not going to dignify your questions with a response, because you’re not really Amber,” House said. “Just my very confused subconscious.”
“Are you really?”
“What?”
“Confused,” Amber said. “And you just answered one of my questions.”
“This would be slightly less annoying if you were naked, at least.”
Amber got up and started pacing around House’s office a bit. Then she spoke again, “Don’t you think it’s interesting that your subconscious is asking these questions? They seem pretty legitimate to me.”
“There is no you!” House said. “You’re me.”
“So you agree, the questions are legitimate?”
“I just decided that I don’t like me very much,” House said.
“And yet Wilson loves every fiber of your annoying ass,” Amber said. “That has to count as one of the seven wonders of the world.”
“Well, that’s something we can agree on,” House said.
“And me being you, I know you love him just as much,” Amber said. “The next step is obvious. I’d think you two idiots wouldn’t dance around it so much.”
“Is everything about sex with you people?”
“In your mind, yes,” Amber said, nodding. “As proven by you immediately jumping to ‘sex’ when I never said such a thing.”
“But that’s what you were implying.”
“Was I?” Amber asked. She leaned on House’s desk. “Here’s another important question: why is your subconscious so concerned about having sex with Wilson?”
When House woke up, he pulled out the prescription Wilson gave him and decided to make a trip to the pharmacy.