Heartfelt
an excerpt

“Have you ever wanted to fly?” The leaves crunched underfoot as she left the schoolyard with Lisa and Jane.

“Sure…” Lisa’s dark hair stirred in the breeze.

“Really? I thought I was the only one.” Longing and hope bloomed in her chest.

“I’ve always wanted to go up and see what’s above the clouds. Mom and Dad says that airplanes are dangerous though, Katherine. I’d be terrified!” Lisa shivered. Katherine lowered her eyes.

“Oh…no, that’s not what I meant. Not in an airplane”

“You mean like Superman?” Jane’s face lit up and she fingered the Superman keychain on her backpack. She sighed. “I’ve always wanted to be Lois Lane!”

“No, not fly like Superman. I mean with wings of your own.” Lisa and Jane looked at each other and giggled.

“You mean like birds….or angels?” Lisa bumped Katherine’s shoulder. Katherine stopped and turned. She straightened her back and glared at Lisa.

“You, Lisa Jensen, have no right to laugh at me. Your parents are paranoid. I am a Windsor.” Katherine stalked off, brushing the tears from her eyes. She walked as quickly as she could, but even the stamping of her feet did not stop her from hearing the muttered comments.

“She thinks she’s such a princess.”

“I know, don’t worry about it. I mean, have you seen how they treat her? Jenny is the star of that family. Easy.”

Katherine wiped her eyes. “Lisa! Jane. Hurry up!” She heard footsteps as the girls caught up. “Jane your mother knows we’re coming right?”

“Of course, Katherine, and she promised to have cookies when we get there.”

“Good, the last time we came over, she said she was too tired after working all day. I mean really. What does she do?”

Jane stared at her feet. “She’s an E.R. nurse, Katherine.”

“Well, my mother is always ready for us when we get back.”

With their warmth on either side of her, Katherine walked around the corner. Jane gasped. “Well look here. If it isn’t Jolly James. Been wallowing, James? It’s all you pigs do these days isn’t it?”

Katherine met Jane’s grinning eyes before she looked past her and saw James Peterson. His round face was covered in chocolate again. His hands and knees were covered in mud. James jumped and twisted, his grubby hands going to cover his backside. However, that action only brought attention to the flesh squeezing out of the split seat of his pants. Books and papers had been scattered through the mud of the park.

Katherine stared at the boy’s round eyes as Jane and Lisa snickered. James backed away from them and shoving things into his backpack. “Oh look, he can’t even keep things clean. He’s just a dirty, smelly pig. Jane, Katherine…Let’s go! We’ve got homework and I don’t want to be stuck doing it all night.”

Katherine slowed her steps as they turned up the Jane’s street. She looked behind her again. “Hey, guys. I forgot my science book. I’m just going to run back to school and get it.”

Lisa shook her head. Jane stopped and looked from Lisa to Katherine and back again. “Do you want us to take your stuff?”

Katherine smiled. At least she still had one friend. “No, I’ll just be a minute. I’m fastest in track. I’ll catch up.”

Jane frowned, but she shrugged and trudged after Lisa. Katherine took three deep breaths before turning around. Turning the corner, she could still see James, but he had stopped. He was sitting in the mud with his head down. His muffled sobs were just audible above the wind. Luckily, the wind was blowing towards James so Katherine couldn’t smell him and change her mind. She dropped into a crouch and picked up a few slimy papers…science homework. James already had it done. Katherine sighed.

“James?”

“Wha…What are you doing here?” he demanded, scrubbing his hand over his face. It left streaks of mud that did little to improve his looks.

“Where are you going? I thought you lived in the country. Let me help you pick this stuff up.”

James backed away, contorting his face. “You were with those girls. They pick on me all the time. I can’t help it!” He sat down, hard, and sighed. The earth made a noise like air being let out of a tire. “Tommy and Jesse thought it would be funny to pick on me. They took my backpack and dumped it. If you are offering, I’ll take the help. The wind picks up my papers just as I reach them. It’s like the breeze hates me too!”

“Here,” Katherine left her bag and books on the bench and took his backpack from his trembling hands. “Let’s sort this out first, and then we can fit everything in it.” Katherine flipped through the papers. “Math, Science, English. You already have all the homework done?”

“When you have no friends, you use the time in class to finish your assignments.”

“What do you do at home then?” Katherine handed him a book.

“I read a lot. I’ve started exercising. It’s not easy being a teenager and looking like this. It’s in my genes. My mom is like this, my dad, my gram, my brothers, everyone in my family is big. I used to gain weight every year. Since I started, I’ve lost a little weight. Mom doesn’t think it’s healthy though. She doesn’t understand.” James looked at Katherine again. “You definitely wouldn’t understand either. You’re thinner than a deer in hunting season, my gram would say.”

Katherine smiled and shook her head. He gave her a small smile back. “I don’t understand being heavy, you’re right. But I understand fighting for respect and working hard.”

“What would you know about that?”

“At my old school, I was considered a freak.” James raised his eyebrow. Katherine sighed.

"If you tell anyone, I’ll pound you. Do you understand?” When his head bobbed up and down, his chins followed. Even when he stopped, the kept moving. Katherine chewed her lip. “Would you believe that I’m eleven years old?”

"But…but you look like a junior. I don’t know any middle schoolers who look like you!”

“My sister is ten. Mom says that they had trouble having a baby. When they had me, they were overjoyed. I was still a baby when they had Jenny. They call her their miracle baby. Jenny is a normal fifth-grader. No smarter and no bigger. Me, I’m a freak. I’m doing algebra and chemistry while most kids my age are learning multiplication and grammar. It’s not fair. I went through puberty at eight years old for crying out loud! Mom said I can’t tell anyone. I did at the old school and they all made fun of me.”

“But I’m safe,” James spat. “Nobody would believe me. Or care if they did. You’re pretty and smart. I’m fat and smelly.”

“Why do you smell so bad? Don’t you take showers?”

“Of course! But we, uhh, don’t have a lot of money.” He shrugged and pulled his backpack to his chest. “I should get going.”

“Where are you going? I thought you lived in the country someplace.”

“I live in the trailer park in Centre Hall. Mom works long hours at the bakery, so we go to Gram’s after school. Dad will pick me and my brothers up after his shift at Wal-Mart. He’s a manager, you know.”

“Will you be all right?”

“Yeah, you got me straightened out. Gram will fix my pants. Thanks…” he frowned. “You’re new. I don’t know your name.”

“I’m Katherine. Katherine Windsor. Don’t tell anyone that I helped you and don’t repeat what I told you. Do you promise?”

“Promise. Thanks, Katherine. I been picked on my whole life. You’d never know how rare a kind word is when you’re fat.”

Katherine nodded and glanced at the ground. “I have to go. Lisa and Jane will be waiting for me.”

“Don’t hang around them too long or you’ll turn out like them. You’ll be popular, but you won’t be nice anymore.”

“Thanks for the advice.” Katherine stopped at the bench. “I’ll see you around, James.”

Deep in thought, Katherine walked to Jane’s house. Her mind wasn’t on the science homework or the dinner. When her mother picked her up at eight, she was still distracted.

“Mom, why am I so different?”

“Giant Kathy, smart Kathy. Why are you weird?” The snide voice of her little sister sang out from the back seat. Katherine whipped around.

“Shut it, stupid! I wasn’t asking you, and don’t call me Kathy! My name is Katherine!”

“Katherine, be nice to your sister.”

“Mom! She called me stupid!”

“Katherine, don’t call your sister stupid.” A few sullen moments passed as Jenny hummed, off-key, in the back seat and they left town for the country.

“Mom, why am I different? I’m eleven years old! Why am I a junior in high school? Nobody can tell the difference either! If I were a child prodigy, all right. I’d be little and I’d be the smart kid. But I’m eleven! Everybody things I’m seventeen! How does that work?” Katherine tugged a lock of wavy brown hair out of her ponytail.

“Katherine, everybody develops at their own rate. Yours is just faster than everyone else.” Katherine watched the windshield wipers cross the glass.

“Mom, that’s boring. Nobody cares why the freak is different. I want to sing. Turn the radio up!”

“Yes, darling.” Their mother turned the dial as they pulled into their long winding driveway. Katherine ground her teeth as her sister started screeching. She crossed her arms and fumed. “Katherine, don’t frown. You’ll get wrinkles.”

“Daddy’s home!” Jenny shrieked and Katherine looked out the window. Their father stood at the front door, shifting his weight from foot to foot. As his wife parked the car, he dashed across the gravel into the garage.

“Isabel! Where have you been? I expected you home hours ago. There’s news!” He glanced at Katherine.

“Michael? What is it? What are you doing home? You were in New York for a meeting. What’s going on?”

“I…uh…we need to talk.” He kept his gray eyes on Katherine as he steered his wife into the kitchen. The girls followed. “Don’t you girls have homework to do?”

“I did it at Jane’s house. I’m all done.” Katherine dropped her bag into a chair. Jenny only smiled.

“Fine, Katherine, get your sister a snack. I need to talk to your mother.” He yanked Isabel into the living room.

“That was strange.” Jenny tiptoed to the doorway. “Don’t you want to hear? They’re talking about you.”

“What?” Katherine stood beside her sister.

“Keep it down, I’m trying to listen!” They crouched down and Katherine held her breath.

“They’ve found us. Don’t you understand?

“How could they have found us, Michael? It doesn’t make sense.”

“We have to get Katherine out of here. We’ve kept her for eleven years! We never would have kept her if we knew you were pregnant. Now, she might get us all killed. We have to get her out of here!”

“She thinks she’s our daughter. We can’t just dump her on the street.”

“I always knew you were too weird to be a Windsor!”

“Shut up, Jenny!” Katherine pushed the girl. Jenny pushed back and Katherine tumbled into the living room. She looked up at her parents.

“Katherine! What are you doing?”

“I could ask the same thing, Mom. We heard you in the kitchen. What’s going on? All this time?” Katherine’s voice rose as she stood to face them. “I’m not a Windsor. If you ‘kept’ me, then where did you get me? I don’t understand.”

“Keep quiet, Katherine. This is no concern of yours.”

“No concern of mine? I’m not your daughter. You’ve lied to me all my life. Now you just want to drop me on the side of the road? Who am I, Mom? What am I?”

“I know who you are.”

“Mom!” Jenny dashed into the room. The man who followed Jenny into the room, made Katherine’s stomach tighten. His eyes were intense, staring into her soul.

“I know what you are, Kethry. We’ve been looking for you for eleven years.”

“Who are you? What do you want with me?” He wasn’t that much taller than her. She would just fit under his chin. No, stay focused.

“I’m Jestin Kaber. I was a year old when you were born. You were only a month old when they appointed me your guardian. The best day of my life was followed by the worst day of my life. It was only a few hours after the ceremony binding us together that it happened. Your mother went to check on you before retiring for the night. You weren’t in your…room.” He shook his head. Jenny cowered on the sofa with her mother and father. Katherine looked from Jestin to them and then back again.

“I don’t understand.”

He smiled at her and reached his hand out to her. “You’re going to have to trust me. There’s not a lot of time left. We found you which means that they’ll find you too.”

“They’ve already found her. They’re in town, but they don’t know where the house is quite yet. It won’t take long. She has to leave…tonight.”

“Daddy? Do you know him?” Katherine stepped towards her father.

“Of course not, the man who brought you when you were a baby was old. He wore a black cape. Very strange man. He said that he found you on his doorstep. We were desperate for a child. A few weeks later, we found out that Jenny was coming and just after that, the man returned. We would have let him just have you back, but he was muttering about ‘there can’t be any witnesses’ and he came at Isabel with a long knife.” He shook his head. “I had to protect my baby. I had to! We moved shortly after that. Every few years, they catch up to us and try to kill us. They’ve all failed. This new one…he’s good.”

“What was I then? I was your miracle, but you shoved me aside when you found out you had a real Windsor baby? Why didn’t you just drop me off at the closest orphanage as you rode out of town.”

“Kethry, I know you want answers, but if they’re that close…we just don’t have the time.” He reached out his hand for her. “Please, come with me. Your family will be safe once they realize that you’re not here, but I need to get you to safety.”

“My name is Katherine,” she protested. She stared long into his eyes before turning back to the Windsors. “They’re not my family. A family would have loved me, no matter whose blood was in my veins. They wouldn’t have cared that I was a little different and they wouldn’t have rubbed it into my face. No…I have no family here.”

The Windsors didn’t even flinch as Katherine turned her back on them and took Jestin’s hand. His grin, and dimple, was all the reward she needed. “It’s a long trip, but I’ll take care of everything. I’ll explain everything when we get home. It will be better, you’ll see. Trust me.”

“I trust you, Jestin. I have no idea why, but I trust you.” Katherine followed him out of the house and on to her new…or back to her old life.