Excerpt: Bittersweet

“This... isn’t what I expected.”

“Me neither,” Jake nodded.

They had put Ryan’s computer monitor on the ground and tossed in the DVD of Starsky and Hutch and were curled together on the bed to watch it. The blanket was still snug around them and Ryan wasn’t shaking anymore.

But maybe that was the can of beer they were sharing.

“So,” Ryan began quietly, “are you going to hate me in the morning for this?”

“Huh?”

“Jake,” he twisted to face him, turning his back on the antics of Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson. “We’re... snuggling in my bed.”

“Yeah.”

“And you’re... actually okay with that?”

“I think so,” he replied awkwardly. “I mean... it feels right, isn't that enough?”

“Yeah,” Ryan replied quickly, nodding.

Jake grinned and shifted them just slightly so that Ryan was on his back on the mattress and he was on his side and leaning over him slightly. He grinned at him, deciding he quite liked the sight.

“This,” Ryan smirked, relaxing a bit, “is what I was expecting.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jake grumbled, bracing himself over the other boy and brushing his lips against his. There were still no fireworks in the soft kiss. There might have been a bit of a spark though, something that made Jake’s heart speed up just a little bit.

“So...” Ryan began awkwardly, resting his hands on Jake’s shoulders.

“Yeah?”

“Is this going to be like... a regular thing?”

Jake paused, licking his lips. Ryan was lying calmly beneath him willing and talented and gorgeous. He slid his hand down his ribs again, fascinated by the sharp ridges beneath his fingers and the fabric. He smiled at him and proceeded to slip his hand quickly up his shirt, fingers splaying out over his narrow chest.

“Jake?”

“Well... I mean...”

He curled his fingers around Ryan’s sharp hips and then slid them down Ryan’s arms to his wrist, lifting it to his lips and pressing teasing kisses against his stars and scars.

“Jake?”

“...yeah.”

“Yeah?”

Jake nodded, leaning forward to press a firm, chaste kiss against Ryan’s lips, “I’d like that if you would. The regular thing, I mean.”

Ryan swallowed thickly, gazing rather dazedly up at him. He licked his lips, dark eyes a little bit brighter than normal.

“Are you feeling alright?”

“Yes,” Ryan replied quickly, gripping Jake’s jaw and tugging him down for a real kiss. He slid his tongue slowly against the other boy’s lips, excited and all but vibrating beneath him.

He grinned down at him, “so... so, what does this all mean, then?”

Ryan reddened a little.

“What?”

“I think...” he laughed softly, “I think we agreed to not be sluts anymore.”

Jake let out a quick rush of air, peering down at Ryan through his messy hair. To not be sluts anymore, that was a big step. It didn’t actually sound like a big step. But it was.

A few days ago I woke up in the middle of a threesome. Now I’m monogamous. With a guy.

“That alright?” Ryan asked casually, brushing his hair back and out of his face.

“Yes,” Jake stated firmly, surprising himself with his own answer.