Excerpt: Cupid, Inc.

“There is a hidden world.”
He adjusted his robes about himself as if girding for the battle that was about to come. These were some hardhearted souls, but maybe he could reach a few of them. Maybe just one. One would count for something.
“A hidden world?” came a voice from the throng.
“Yes, there are things unseen, things that don’t fit the rules that I’m here to teach you about.”
“Cool, so we don’t have to learn any of this bullshit,” said a kid in the second row of the lecture hall.
“No, you still have to learn it, if for no other reason than to recognize the exceptions when they occur.”
“Balls,” said the kid and slumped down in his chair.
“But, professor,” said a girl in the second to last row of the lecture hall, “why learn a bunch of stuff that you’re telling us doesn’t matter?”
“Oh, I never said it didn’t matter. It’s just that, when you know the order of the world, the disorder is that much more…magical.”
“Magical?” snorted a guy in a letter jacket in the middle of the room, slouching with his knees spread wide apart, invading the space of the students on either side of him. “What kinda stuff did you smoke in the sixties?”
“Young man, you’re a junior, right?”
“Yeah,” he replied with a smirk and a self-satisfied glance at the students around him.
“Then why are you in ‘basic physics for non-scientists’? You’re aware this is a freshman level class and an elective at that, yes? It’s not a requirement for your degree in,” he shuffled through some papers on his desk, “fitness center management.”
“The coach told him it was one of the few classes he couldn’t screw up,” heckled another letter jacket from several rows behind the kid, who was now attempting to shrink into his chair as giggles erupted around him.
“Yes,” he said, “this is what is commonly referred to as a ‘blow-off class’. But I do expect you to pay attention. There will be quizzes and two tests, but no equations, calculations, or substantial memorization. In exchange for this…lax academic environment, I only ask that you keep an open mind about the things that I talk to you about. For instance, the topic of the ‘hidden world’.”
“You mean, like, secret places, hidden rewards, bonus experiences that are just out there to find?” asked a guy in an army jacket and Chuck Taylor hightops.
“Yes, something like that.”
“Wow, it’s just like playing Rune Avenger online.”
“Uh, yes, I suppose so.”
“Is it like, you know, finding a really cool sale at the mall?” asked a bouncy blonde girl in the second row with a too-tight sweater and moon boots.
“That would be another way to…uh…”
“So, why do you wear that robe and that hat?” asked a kid with greasy hair, who was slouching halfway out of his black trench coat.
“It serves to remind me who I am, where I come from.”
“You mean the Dark Ages?” whispered a girl sitting near the back door of the lecture hall.
The bell rang and conversation erupted in a deafening roar around the hall as streams of students flowed towards the exits.
“Read chapter one for the next class. There may be a quiz,” he shouted halfheartedly at the backs of the retreating students.
He took the back door out of the lecture hall and made his way back to his office. He was intercepted by the department chairman just as he reached his door. The man could have been the poster child for chronic indigestion.
“Hey Padraig, how’s it going?” asked the chairman with the barest attempt at a smile, an attempt he quickly abandoned in favor of his normal expression which was a mixture of three parts disdain and two parts constipation.
“Swimmingly,” Padraig replied, trying to open his door and slip through without further conversation.
“Uh, Padraig, could I have a word?”
“Sure,” he replied with a sigh of resignation.
“The, uh, curriculum committee is looking to cut some classes. I know your ‘basic’ class is one of the most popular in the school, but I think we all know why. I just thought you should hear it from me before you hear it around the water cooler. It’s a strong possibility that we’re going to have to cut it from the schedule.”
“Well, thanks for the heads up,” he said wearily.
“Mmm Hmm,” said the chairman and sauntered away.
Padraig keyed his way into his office. He went straight to the window and opened one side of the double pane just a crack. He took off his cap and brushed his hair back between his horns. He undid the buttons on the robe and hung it on the coat rack. A sigh of relief came from his mouth as he was finally able to raise his tail from between his hairy legs. He stomped his hooves on the carpet, shaking loose the fur on his legs.
“Like a really cool sale at the mall,” he sighed heavily. “What fools these mortals be.”
He collapsed into a point of light and streaked out the open window to ride the sunlight above the crosstown traffic.