Excerpt: Mastery at Nightfall part 3: The Celestial Pull

1.
Have you ever just wanted to run....no place in specific, just wanted to get away? Everything in me is begging to be unleashed so that I can escape from this outer shell, my environment, and just be free. I felt like a hurricane had hit my mind, a tornado had ravished my soul, and awakened something in me that realized that there has to be something better than this.
The moment came crashing down on me, and hard, when my old flame entered at stage left and walked steadily in my direction. Dimitri Moreau. We had the sort of relationship that no one envied. The kind where we met up, partook in mind blowing sex, and then disappeared on one another for the next three to four months. Why we continued this shameful self depreciating spiral, I cannot say. Was the sex really that good when it came down to it? Or did we really just hate ourselves that much?
The worst thing about Moreau and I is that we constantly fall into this crippling, unhealthy belief that we are somehow in love with one another. Which just can’t be the case and only causes further damage to my psyche.
You see, Moreau is a womanizing bad boy. The kind whiney pop girls sing about taking home to their parents because they crave that chewy rule breaking center he possesses. And me? Well, I’m a conundrum all my own. A scholar who runs a small town bar, is best friends with her older brother, and has too many daddy issues to speak of.
The point is, people who are in love do not hurt each other. Not on purpose anyway. And not more then once. Moreau and I had bounced the relationship ball back and forth like a beach ball at a rock concert. It wasn’t landing anywhere permanent. Both of us knew it, but we couldn’t stay away from it. Something primal happened to us when we were in each others vicinity. Something ancient and smarter then us. Something that might eventually kill us. A pull that neither be defined or reasoned with.
I would have bolted for the nearest door if Dimitri had not just walked into my place of work. I was the boss here at the Burgess and so, I had to remain professional. Most people knew him anyway. They had seen us together on plenty of occasions. I had to stick to the smiles and winks that they were used to. For appearances sake. In reality, Dimitri had been the latest cause of my emotional baggage that weighted every romantic decision that I made so I was more then a bit testy with him. He pulled me in with promises of forever and then crushed me like a hopeless little bug. He was not to be trusted.
What royally sucked was that he was still so attractive. His lean body held just the right amount of sculpted muscle, his lightly sun dusted skin gleamed even in the dim lit bar. He had let his dark shaggy hair grow out and secured it in a ponytail at his nape. It didn’t look greasy or unkempt, but freshly cleaned and straight. His face held stubble, a look that he’d been favoring lately. It made him look dangerous. However Moreau had these soulful tawny eyes that pierced right through my heart whenever I looked into them. He was painfully good looking. Just my type. Taller then me. A pick me up and throw me down kind of guy.
I hated him all the more for it.
“Sarai.” He greeted me as he sat at the bar. The leather jacket he wore wafted and I could smell his dark and sexy scent. Spicy and delicious. I managed not to lick my chops though I was hard pressed not to.
“Hey handsome.” I did not look at him or smile, only continued to wipe down the corner of counter I was currently at. “What’ll it be?”
“Some alone time.”
I raised my eyes to his, letting him see my impatience. “As I’ve told you every other time you’ve waltzed into my bar: after hours.” I rose my brows at him. It wasn’t like he didn’t know I was annoyed with him.
“Sarai. Stop avoiding me.”
No can do, Sherriff. You see, even though I had plenty of people to pick up my slack I was not ready to talk to him about our latest tiff. We’d gotten into it and then he’d left for four weeks on some other business. Granted, it was important. Something that concerned not only me, not only him, but all of our kind. And knowing him he could have been gone for a lot longer, so four weeks was more like a record for him. Still I remained unimpressed. And I was not about to let him back into my life so easily. He’d casually heel toed through my bedroom on too many occasions, and I had allowed it. We’d been on the same page. Sex and friendship and nothing more. All of that changed when he attempted to make us exclusive. That had lasted all of what, four days?
We don’t do well together. I’m sure you could have guessed as much.
“In the alley. Now.”
Moreau also had a jackass way of making everything an order with me. He was used to getting his way. The stupid thing was I had indulged him far too many times to change up on him randomly. Even when I really, really wanted to.
I watched him walk behind the counter and pass me to the back rooms which held my office and storage. He did not glance behind to see if I was coming. Somehow he was counting on my obedience.
I would have loved to prove him wrong and would have if I really wanted to. On the other hand what he had to say just might be serious, and considering my latest run in with danger and my yearly close call with death I was nervous enough to oblige him.
Waving at my coworker Don to let him know I was off, I followed Moreau out. My office led to an alley way which had our dumpster and nothing more. Well, that and a small curb I sat on once and a while when I wanted some air. Either way, the entirety of the action was in the front of the building, not behind it. It was ideal for secluded conversation. Or for changing into my wolf form and darting off into the distance unseen.
Yes, I am a werewolf. If you haven’t heard. This days, I’m surprised to meet people who have no idea of my furry status.
Moreau leaned against a far wall and slipped his jacket off of his shoulders. This only succeeded in revealing his sumptuously tight white shirt that molded to his heavy muscles, like nothing but pure power held it there instead of seams.
I put on a bored posture and sat on the curb, keeping my distance from him.
“How was Iowa?” I asked blithely.
“Uneventful.” Moreau dusted his fingers off on the rim of his shirt. “Nobel wanted to do an entire perimeter check, but hesitated on unfamiliar ground. We stayed a while and tried to get a feel, or a vibe, but to no avail. We are going to need a lot more then eyes and ears on this one.”
Recently, our kind had been majorly attacked by wolf hunters. They had been creeping up on us repeatedly for years now and seemed nigh relentless. Though their latest mission failed, we were too on our guard to let them alone for too long in order to recuperate. The bastards had created more then one science facility dedicated to destroying werewolves, and in their stride were killing actual wolves as well. Now they had retreated to some backwater country land in Iowa, where no were’s lived. None. This is strange to my pack, as it should be. Was there some reason wolves were no where around this particular state? Was it a supernatural reason? Were they being killed off? We had no contacts with anyone in the state at all. And so in waltzes our faction of super heroes, what we call the Stand for Wolf Allegiance (or SWA…or Martyrs…), rushing in at the speed of light to check it out.
Moreau had recently decided to make his allegiance with the martyrs known, and joined in their stalwart efforts to keep wolves all over safe. Its not that I am against this, in fact I had done my part more then once in helping the SWA, but this is not the kind of man that Dimitri is.
He has also been using his job as an excuse to either elude me or to stalk me. Both things that he does naturally anyway, so what’s with the fancy new title?
“There are really no wolves there?” I was skeptical.
“Not a one that we can see or get in contact with. The hunters have chosen good stomping grounds.”
“Anything else you want to tell me?” I couldn’t help myself.
“Like what exactly, Sarai?”
I just looked up at him. I was not sure what my gaze revealed, or what it didn’t, but I knew that Dimitri could sense my unease. When last we argued, we’d had an actual breakup. Which says something when you are not really dating to begin with.
“Never mind. How long are you back in town for?”
Dimitri was not ready to change the subject. “You are the one who told me to leave, Sarai, so I did. I left. Are you still not happy?”
I wasn’t. Because he knew that I did not actually mean my hasty. But even I was tired of these endless games that the two of us played with one another. I wanted out.
“So you are still under orders to be my bodyguard?” I asked him.
“Nobel seems to think the threat that you pose is minimal.”
My head jerked up at that. “The threat that I pose?” I repeated the last word louder then the rest, as if that were the part that had offended me. When in reality, it was the sentence as a whole.
Moreau blinked slowly. “Did it never occur to you that you can use your powers for evil in the stead of good?”
I growled evilly at him. The sound bounced around the ally walls and carried into the night, effecting the wind around us. He could not hide his disdain for my newly acquired abilities.
I had just discovered that I was a wolf messenger, one day to become a spirit that guides my pack along behind the scenes. It was so much more intense then being a martyr. I had actual powers and shit.
But the development of my powers were slow, and I was not entirely sure when the rest of them would manifest. Or how. Or why. All I knew was that I was a child of destiny. It wasn’t something that I wanted, or even understood, but I had another wolf spirit guiding me through it all. That spirit, surprisingly enough, was Moreau’s mother. Nayami.
He seemed amused by my irritation. As he always did. “I think if you were a baddie, you would have shown your true colors by now. To me, at the very least. Its not like Nobel was too worried. If you turned out to be evil, your father could always end you on our behalf. He is the head of the pack after all. If he could not protect the family from little old you then what good is he for?”
“Thanks for the faith.” I clenched my teeth one last time before forcing myself into relaxing.
Moreau shrugged. “The truth can hurt.”
Say it isn’t so. He had given me that lesson first hand since I was a stumbling, lovelorn teenager.
“So when did you decide that Nobel and his group of goody two shoes were right up your alley?” I was genuinely curious about it. For all intents and purposes, I did not know that much about the man I slept with. Oops, check that. I mean used to sleep with.
“I still have not decided,” he admitted, looking upward without purpose. “I’ve helped them out on occasion, and lately its been more often than not, but this cannot be anything permanent. By your definition I should have hightailed it back to someplace exotic by now.”
“And what’s your definition of me?” It was torn from my throat. Some part of me must be stupid or something.
Moreau’s eyes slid back to me. “Precarious. It is only a matter of time before you relent to me once again.”
It was not the answer I wanted. “Why do you have to trivialize me like that?”
“Do not ask questions that you don’t want the answer to.”
Was it the answer? Me and Dimitri? Nayami told me constantly that the two of us would eventually come to terms with what it is we were. I thought that I had done that already years ago. But there must have been something more to the picture that I was too close to see.
“Face it, Sarai. You have already forgiven me.”
I did not want to admit to anything. So I didn’t.
“And I have already forgiven you,” he continued through my indecision. “Just as it always goes. Just as it always will go.”
“You think our problems so miniscule?”
“I would not even go as far as to call them problems.”
I tapped my foot erratically to the beat of my heart. “There is no way that you can pretend we belong together. Especially after all of this.” All of this being not only my discovery of power, but of his new status as a martyr. As well as him disapproving of my newly found friendship with Cillion, a half wolf half human who had been tortured for years by bloodthirsty hunters.
Dimitri worked a muscle in his jaw and was silent for a long moment. It was probably the first time he was not armed with a ready comeback due to something I had said. But eventually, he bounced back. “Maybe we do not belong together all of the time. But we do belong.”
“Cut the whimsical bullshit.” I stood up finally, having played nice long enough. “Why are you back here, Dimitri?”
“Despite what you think, I want you safe for my own reasons. You just found out I was involved with Nobel and his administration. Before that I was just as protective of you.”
“You know there is a distinct difference now.” Now he was cold and purposeful, not telling me where he was or what he was doing until I forced it out of him. Sure, there was a lot he was ready to share, but there was too much between us now to casually ignore it. “You have never been my body guard. My lover, maybe even my friend or protector. But never hired to take watch over me!”
“I am not getting paid to keep an eye on you-”
“Then what do you want from me?”
“I want you…” he stuttered to a halt, then rubbed his hands into his hair in frustration. “I want…you.”
That took me aback. I stepped back a little into the curb and had to catch myself from toppling over, then managed to do nothing but stare at him for more of his words.
It was the last thing he said to me before taking off down the alleyway with a speed that should only be used by those being chased by man eaters. Dumbfounded, I watched him leave. Whatever was going on with Dimitri and I, it was not to be figured out in one conversation. Had the answer not evaded us for all of this time? Why would it interchange itself to be understood now, when we obviously so badly needed it to run its long and drawn out course?