Childhod Teddy Bear
an excerpt

Three weeks after George found his childhood teddy bear in the attic, he realized it could talk to him. It took awhile to realize this, because he never did much activity in his room, where the bear was kept on top of the dresser Whenever he made his bed, changed his clothes or even went to sleep, the teddy bear would make a comment. George always assumed the noise was something around the house or simply his imagination, due to the fact the bear’s voice never emanated from the bear itself, but somewhere between his ears. He didn’t know how to explain it, nor did he think he wanted to.

George realized this odd ability of his teddy bear when he was working in his room on some drawings. He started it at work during the lunch break, and wanted to finish it at home on the couch, his favorite resting area. Upon returning home, it was occupied by his mother who was watching a movie, and the second favorite resting place, the recliner, was taken by his brother, also watching the movie. Granted, he could have sat at the other end of the couch and finished his drawing...but they were watching a movie, and besides being annoying in itself, his mother and brother had a habit of watching the television with loud volume.

So his room was George’s last option for the night. He set up on the floor on the side of his bed, and after a few minutes he heard the sound, the same one he had mistaken for something else around the house. It didn’t sound like any one thing, but more like a combination of things. He could make out the sound of bubbling syrup, the croaking of toads, and belching. That was as good as he could explain it, due to how unknown the sounds were. After the sounds became more frequents, he listened closer, to try and decipher them.

As he listened the the sounds, he began to realize they were words, and as strange as it sounded, English. It still sounded like a bubbling croak, but for some reason it sounded like English to him. IT was also disjointed english, with “What fish am were art you me” being one of the sentences. It was beginning to freak George out to hear English in incomprehensible sounds, which also seemed to come from nowhere. He continued to listen to the sounds, however, which may as well be called a voice now. Curiosity to who could be in his room was too great.

After a few minutes of random outbursts, the voice said, “Hey? Can you hear me?”

George’s eyes widened in surprise, not expecting to be addressed by the voice. He looked around his room quickly to see if there was anyone or anything which could be making the noise. A man hiding in the small corner, or a tape player or similar device. Anything which could be making the noise.

“Your heard me, didn’t you?” continued the voice. “You’re trying to find me, aren’t you?”

“Where are you?” George asked in a scared voice.

“Glad to hear you finally responding. I’ve been trying to speak with you for weeks, but you kept ignoring me.”

“Stop messing with me. Who and where are you?”

“I’m up here.”

“Up where? In the attic?”

“No, dip-shit,” said the voice angrily. “Up here on the dresser. Where else would I be?”

“On the dresser?” George said as he stood up, panic giving way to confusion. All that was on top of his dresser was some papers, toothbrush, toothpaste, other assorted items and his teddy bear. He continued to look around the dresser for some source of the voice, when it said, “Are you going to continue staring at me, or are you going to say something?”

“Look at you?” said George. “I don’t even know what I’m supposed to be looking for. Where is your voice coming from?”

“My voice is coming from my mouth, and you are looking at me, the black and furry animal sitting on its ass.”

“Your voice is in my teddy bear?”

“No, I am the teddy bear. Are you dense or something?”

“Stop fucking with me. Who are you?”

George heard the voice sigh, the say, “Come closer to the dresser.”

Feeling irritated by not knowing what was going on, he walked closer as the voice asked. He continued to search the top of the dresser with his eyes, not believing the voice came from the bear, or that the bear was the source as the voice claimed.

“My voice is louder now, right?” asked the voice, whose volume was indeed higher.

“So your voice is coming from the dresser,” said George, relieved at finding the source of the disturbance.

“Well, seeing as I’m sitting on the dresser, that would technically be right.”

“Shut up. You are not my teddy bear. That’s impossible. How are you speaking to me?”

“With my mouth.”

“Stop that! Tell me the truth.”

“Honey?” said George’s mother from downstairs. “ Are you all right?”

“Yes, mom,” George said with a little panic. “I’m all right.”

“You might want to be careful,” laughed the voice. “You don’t want you mom catching you talking to a teddy bear.”

“I’m not talking to a teddy bear,” George whispered angrily to the voice.

“What’s going on up there, George?” continued his mother.

“Nothing, mom,” said George, trying to control his temper over the voice’s assertions. “Just talking to myself.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say that,” said the voice, sounding a little hurt. George turned to look at the teddy bear, despite the fact he refused to believe the voice was coming from it.

“Okay, hon,” said George’s mother. “Be sure to let me know if you need anything,” and he heard her go back down the stairs to her movie.

Breathing a sigh of relief, George said, “Alright, so you say your voice is coming from the teddy bear.”

“I just told you,” aid the voice with exasperation. “It’s coming from my mouth, and I AM the teddy bear.”

“Whatever,” said George as he picked up the teddy bear and began squeezing its body.

“What are you doing?” asked the voice.

“Finding the device your voice is coming from.”

“What, like a voice box? You know I don’t have one. Fee free to check if you want to though. Just don’t put your hands over my nether regions too much, or I’ll start to wonder about your sexuality.”

Ignoring the voice, George continued to squeeze his hands around the teddy be, hoping to find something hard within the stuffing. He even checked around the mouth where the voice said it was speaking from. yet he could not find a single indication of an electrical device. Just the proof of a fuzzy and soft teddy bear.

Disgusted with no results, he tossed the teddy bear aside and began searching the top of the dresser extensively, saying, “All right, for real this time. Where is your voice coming from?”

“I believe we already covered that,” said the voice. “and it’s rude to talk to someone and not face them...and toss that said someone to the ground.”

“You are not the teddy bear,” said George, closing his eyes and rubbing his forehead with his fingers. “That’s impossible.”

“Really? Then how is it we are talking with each other?”

“either you have some speaker hidden in this dresser, or...”

“Or what?”

“Or I’m imagining the whole thing. Your voice would be a figment of my imagination.”

There was a slight pause, and the voice said, “Well, both of those theories are wrong, because there’s no vice box in me or in the dresser, and you certainly aren’t imagining this conversation. I don’t think you’re that bored.”

“Teddy bears don’t talk.”

“Is it that hard to believe?”

“Yeah,” George said as he sat down on his bed, trying hard not to stare at the bear. “It’s very hard.”

“Well, would it help if I could prove I really am who I claim I am?”

“I don’t see how you can do that.”

“Very well then. Let’s see...your mother was in your room here while you were gone, dropping off the clean laundry for you. While here she thought she could be helpful and put them away fro you, and in the process rearranged all your clothes in the drawer.”

“Yeah right. She knows how much I hate it when she goes through my clothes like that.”

“I know she knows, but she did it all the same. Was muttering something about how you never organize anything right.”

“It doesn’t matter what you say,” said George forcefully, despite the fact he knew that was how his mother would put it if he saw his clothes drawer. “She knows very well to stay away from my stuff.”

“Really?” said the voice thoughtfully. “Why don’t you have a look and see for yourself. The proof is right there.”

Feeling strong in his feelings for his mother, George stood up and opened the pants drawer of dresser, and was immediately taken aback. To the casual observer, it was just a simple drawer with pants inside, but to the keen eye of George, he could tell the pants had been rearranged. His dress pants were placed in his “new” section, denim pants in one stack, and the black pair of khakis he was going to wear tomorrow at the very bottom of a stack of pants. George looked through one drawer after another, and was greeted with the same surprised of finding the system of his clothes set up all in disarray, in a style not his own. Someone had been through his things.

“Was I right?” asked the voice, sounding very pleased with itself.

“You did this, didn’t you?” said George.

“If I could move and pick up things heavier than myself, do you think I would remain on your dresser?”

“Shut up. You are not a teddy bear, whoever you are. You came into the room and rearranged my things. What else did you do.”

“You would rather think that than believe your mom messed with your things?

“Even if she did do that, it doesn’t prove you’re my teddy bear. Far as I know you have cameras and speakers all over my room. What else did you do?”

“Now this is just getting silly,” said the voice, which was beginning to sound annoyed. “Why in the world would I do that? Come into your room, place cameras and speakers in hidden locations, and rearrange your laundry? Does that sound smart to you?”

“Well,” said George, his conviction crumbling, “It’s certainly more believable than a talking teddy bear.”

“Grow up,” said the voice angrily. “You think someone has something against you? You of all people? George Summers, who barely graduated two years ago from high school? Living with his parents and working because he didn’t have the money or smarts to get into college? Had to give up your dreams in order to pay his due back to parents and society?”

“Shut up,” whispered George, not expecting to be attacked like this.

“You have any enemies who think you are worth the effort to make you think a teddy bear is talking to you? Any friends for that manner? Last I heard, all you do these days is work and sit about, moaning and groaning about how you have nothing to do and no one to go to.”

“Shut up,” George said, closing his eyes and covering his ears in an effort to block out the words, but it was impossible. The voice was coming from somewhere between his ears, which he could not touch.

“In fact,” said the voice, speaking louder, “when was the last time you had a girl? Ever been kissed, George? Has a girl even looked at you without disgust? When was the last time you were even in the presence of a woman who didn’t make you sick? Or are you too busy working yourself over on the toilet bowl?”

“Shut up!” cried out George, hands clenched at his sides and eyes wide open and staring at the teddy bear on the floor. It was laying on top of its head and turned away, legs supported against the wall. In panic, George realized he cried out loud enough to have even people in the basement hear him. He looked at the closed door of his room, fully expecting to hear his mother come rushing up the stairs, and demand to know what was really long this time. For a full minute, however, George heard no such rush, and knew that his mother, for whatever reason, wasn’t coming up.

Sighing with relief, George rubbed his sweating face, his hands shaking from the rage and fear. He never felt so helpless.

“Got you pretty good, didn’t I?” said the voice in a reassuring tone.

“Shut up,” sobbed George, doing his best not to cry.

“I only did it because you refuse to accept the truth. This isn’t some technological invasion of your privacy, or someone getting back at you. It’s just a talking teddy bear who happened to see something happen while you were away.”

“Whatever.”

“Honestly. You think I want to piss you off and have you ignore me all over again? I’ve been dealing with that for weeks. You have any idea how annoying that is? You know how it feels to have no one pay attention to you, right?”

After a short pause, George said, “Yeah, I do.”

“Of course you do,” said the voice with a matter-of-fact tone, “and that’s all I’m looking for. Just some company while I sit my ass on that dresser. Gets a little lonely up there if you know what I mean.”

George was beginning to calm down, though still felt sick about the situation. He was being asked to believe his teddy bear, an inanimate object, was alive, something he didn’t want to believe. There was no other reasoning behind it though. As the voice said, he was essentially a nobody, with a no nothing life, job and living. No logical reasoning to anything which was going on. And yet hear was this voice he could hear.

“As soon as you are ready,” said the voice, interrupting his thoughts. “Would you mind picking my up and place me back on the dresser? Being on my face doesn’t feel very comfortable.”

“Sure,” said George, who walked over to the teddy bear and picked it up. Looking at its face, he noticed the face got a little dirty from being on the floor, and brushed everything off.

“While you didn’t need to do that,” said the voice. “that was a nice thing to do.”

“Your welcome,” said George, and placed the teddy bear back on top of the dresser where it belonged. He walked back to his bed and sat down, taking a glance at his unfinished drawing on the floor, no longer caring to finish it. After a few more moments of silence, George said to the teddy bear, “Has my mom or anyone else been doing anything else in my room?”

“Not really,” said the voice, which George finally believed was the teddy bear’s. “Not much ever happens in here.”