Excerpt: Hidden Agenda

Without him even touching me, I felt him making love to me with his eyes. Piercing the inner most parts of me. Physically I wanted him. Emotionally I wanted him. But I always stopped myself from fulfilling the desired that burned deep within. It was one thing to know what you want. And another thing to put the plans in motion to get what you deserve.
Jeff was a good man. The kind that put the woman he is with needs before his own. He had always given himself so selfishly. Which is more than I can say for some of the “boys” I dealt with in the past. He wasn't with me for cosmetic reasons. Jeff was a man of substance. His kisses made me thank God I was a woman. His touch caressed not only my body, but my soul. No matter how much I wanted him, my past wouldn't allow it. How could I ever tell him the real reason for the walls that surrounded the essence of me. How could I explain the dirty little secret that haunts my soul everyday of my life. It's hard to bring someone you love into your pain. At least for me it was.