Back to Beyond
an excerpt

Nick was watching Phiil with some concern … she just wasn’t acting like the straight-laced woman he knew. True, she was a lot more fun in this state, with the way she pressed herself against him as they walked, her breast pressing softly into his arm as she held on. He knew it was for support, but it almost felt like she was purposefully trying to be near him, to touch him. She was allowing him to see her very funny side too … she had a warm natural laugh that was tinkling out over the forest every few minutes as they trekked, but she just wasn’t being her usual bluff self and it was beginning to bother him. For instance she kept calling him Foamy and admiring his pelt. He was aware that he had nice hair … women had often told him so, but he had never ever thought of it, or heard it described, as a pelt before. He thought he might have noticed if he had suddenly grown enough body hair to be stroked and cooed over in the way she was doing now. Not that the stroking itself was bothering him … it was more the dramatic shift in attitude. Nick stopped in the middle of the path and turned to face Phil. For the first time he noticed that her blue eyes were glazed and she had now begun to slur her words somewhat. A very nasty idea suddenly occurred to him … Hone had been always very into the more dodgy aspects of country living. And Hone had been the one who had collected the mushrooms that morning. Not only that but he had been fairly insistent about which mushrooms were the most delicious and which would make Phil more likely to appreciate a delicacy she didn’t usually eat. It didn’t take much to realise what had happened. And now it was also obvious why Hone hadn’t wanted to come with them this morning. He knew Nick would have been furious with him for playing this idiotic prank on Phil. But now was not the time for recriminations against the absent Hone, now was the time to get Phil a little help. He sat her down on a nearby log and knelt in front of her with concern etched all over his face. Phil was still pretty happy in her drugged state but he knew it was only a matter of time before she had a massive come down.

Phil wondered why Foamy had stopped walking but smiled happily as she realised that he had brought her to a pizza joint. They went in and she sat down in a red-vinyl booth. Strangely enough it looked exactly like the ones from old movies and TV shows like Happy Days. Placidly Phil sat there while Foamy knelt on the floor in front of her and asked her what type of pizza she wanted.
‘Yes peperoni with extra cheese thanks Foam’ she giggled happily
But for some reason Foamy refused to get up and go get the pizza. He seemed to think she should have rhubarb flavoured pizza instead. Phil sniggered into her glass of soda … she couldn’t remember getting herself a glass but she figured Foamy must have ordered it ahead of time. What a great guy he was … or great squirrel she sniggered happily to herself. As she thought that she collapsed again into helpless giggles, snorting unbecomingly over the now not-so pristine table before her. Foamy leapt backwards as she snorted out her drink and looked a bit anxious.
‘It’s OK Foamy … I like rhubarb heaps, just not as a pizza topping’ she said pompously … now go and get me my peperoni so I don’t starve to death out here’
Foamy chittered angrily for a minute and then rushed off … he came back remarkably quickly with another glass of drink.
‘Here’ he said ‘… try this nectar, it will make you strong enough to face the rhubarb pizza and go on as one of the greatest pizza eaters of our time’
Phil accepted the glass and drank then spat it out.
‘Foamy’ she said angrily ‘you tricked me … this is just water’

Nick heaved a sigh of relief. If Phil was realising that this was indeed just water, then she was definitely starting to come out of it. He looked at the ground distastefully … and the vomit that had barely missed his shoes as he leapt away had most likely gotten most it out of her system. Now it was just a matter of waiting out her final hallucinations before they began the trek back. Nick was livid with Hone … they had lost an entire day because of this idiotic prank, and most likely the fragile trust he and Phil had built up. He pushed away the realisation that he was more annoyed about the lost trust than the wasted day.