Confessions of Shameless Agitator
an excerpt

From all the reading I've done and the years I spent practicing yoga, I recognize that when I am most uncomfortable with a situation it means I am finally getting close to the heart of it. When you most want to run away is the time when you have to stand your ground and face your fears.

That can be hard to do. We humans are not programmed to to seek out discomfort. We want to go with the flow and not make a fuss. We want to be comfortable and well-fed. We don't want to face the issues and parts of our lives that make our stomachs turn, make our hearts race, make us want to run away. The problem is once you start running it is difficult to stop.

It seems much easier to deny the difficult emotions and stuff them away. Sublimation does not solve anything. Then you sit on the sofa, staring blankly at the television, eating food hand over fist, trying to fill that anxious void.

I know how hard it can be to turn and face something when you really want to run away. I had my own demons to face this summer. I know what can happen to a relationship when you let anger take over and when you stop communicating. I know how close I came to throwing it all away because it seemed easier to run from the problems rather than turn and face them. I had to remind myself of my tattoo and why I got it.

I learned what fearlessness really means when I was at the bottom with nowhere to go and I realized that if I ran away I would lose so therefore I had nothing left to lose by finally confronting the problems.