I'm Everything I Need
an excerpt

FATE. What is fate? Why is it so important? There’s no need to start with the question ‘is the idea of fate important?’ The concept of fate, or destiny, as it is more commonly referred to, is one that we as a group of people have talked about and written about for hundreds of years. Very little, if anything, lasts that long without being of some importance. Puzzles seem to slip through time, years become decades and centuries, but since they are never solved, they never die. And the idea of fate is nothing if not a puzzle.

In it’s simplest definition, fate (or destiny) is a predetermined course of events. People go on to make this idea applicable to everyday life. Things happened because they were supposed to happen. In a world of chaos there is a strict sense of order in a language that no one can really understand. Many people claim to. They’ll say it was written in the stars, it was meant to be, they always knew this would happen, all because they knew the future, there was no question about it. The signs were all there. You just had to pick them up and interpret them. But it’s not enough to say what those little things, little bits of colored glass, are just bits of glass, or tell you the current state of a person. No, people go on to predict what will happen in days, weeks, years to come, as though life is a path with a finite end. You were always expected to reach that point, that end. If someone who believes in fate is flexible enough, maybe they’ll say that the road can be deviated from every now and again, but the end result is still there, and that’s all that matters.

Why do people believe in fate? True, the ideas are probably forced upon some. Some societies and houses of belief leave no negotiation on the subject. But what of those who voluntarily believe in the idea of fate? What is so endearing about the concept? What is so appealing about it? Is it comforting to know that there is some greater plan, that if you fail it’s not your fault, because you were doomed to fail from the very beginning? Does it give people an excuse to withhold action, to see where the wind takes them? Is it reassuring to believe that there is some force beyond all of us, a being that knows all and is working behind the scenes? To believe in fate, one would have to believe in someone to create that fate, that sort of destiny, that pot of gold at the end of a very long windy rainbow (in addition to the rainbow itself). Everything happens for a reason. It was meant to be that way.

That’s why religions and groups of people create deities, in my opinion. There are natural forces all around them, and it’s only human for us to want to personify them in some way. To say there is a god or God in control of it all. Because you can’t control the weather, and the idea of not having control over something that has such sway in your life can be terrifying. It’s comforting to know that there’s someone out there who knows what he’s doing, who knows the master plan even when you don’t. If you think things are meant to be a certain way, then it’s not your fault if they don’t turn out. You certainly didn’t have control over it. It’s not your failure. You were working against a god or God, someone who can change the world with one single word. He has set a path out for you, so take comfort in that fact, because you’ll get along. You won’t have to worry about it.

This sort of thing takes different forms. Not just in the form of deities. To say “I knew this person would become this way, or marry this kind of person, or take this job” is all well and good. But how certain can one really be? Why are we so unwilling to believe that there is something going on that isn’t dictated by some higher power? A boy grows up to have a healthy sense of self-esteem. Maybe it wasn’t his fate. Maybe it was because he came from a supportive family. Maybe a child’s surname defines what he will become when he grows up, what skills he’ll be taught. Maybe he will become part of a self-fulfilling prophecy. He will be motivated to work hard on accepting his fate, because what else can you do? He was meant to do this work and become this sort of man.

To believe in a deity doesn’t necessarily mean you have to accept the idea of fate so easily. Some people believe that the world was created out of chaos and allowed to exist on its own, like a little wind-up toy that’s allowed to wander until the mechanics fall motionless. You can actually control your own god, in a way. You can give Him as much control as you want, or as little. But the idea remains: if you don’t believe in fate, does that mean it doesn’t exist? You can choose not to believe in it. But if fate truly exists, believing in it or not shouldn’t matter. It’s just there, unable to be touched or manipulated by us.

But what happens to one when she refuses to believe in it, for the sake of principle or otherwise? Should she give up in the face of unmistakable evidence or ‘proof?’ Or will she be considered stubborn for pressing on? Will she grow to accept what’s in front of her, or will she eventually change in such a way that she creates a third option?