Excerpt: Belong

“The last thing I thought before I went unconscious was that I would have wanted to die in a place other than Zauire,” Cassidy said abruptly, her voice soft. Erika tilted her head slightly in her direction. It was the only movement that let Cassidy know that Erika was listening. She took a deep breath. She had started. Now she had to continue. “I was sacrificed here in the exact same city three years ago. When I opened my eyes and saw that I was in Laeslorde, you wouldn’t believe how overjoyed I was. I thought that I would have a chance to start over and be a different person. I wouldn’t have to remember that I had been sacrificed or that my father had been the one to offer me to the dwarves. Nobody knew me there. I could be a completely different person and they would never know.”

Cassidy blinked away tears. “It didn’t work. Every night I’d have the same dream over and over again. It was always my father telling me that I wasn’t good enough, even if I was better than him in magic. Then I’d see the knife.” She shuddered. “I’d be scared to go to sleep on some nights, not wanting to see my father again. I wanted to be a different person in Laeslorde, but I was forced to relive that night. I couldn’t let go of my past. Somehow, my father had followed me into the third world.”

“I have the same dreams,” Erika whispered. Cassidy was startled at the sound of her voice. “I always see the people that are close to me, telling me that I’m a godforsaken loser. I’m just a half-blood. I’ll never be truly an elf, but never completely human, either. At times I can hear my dad’s voice. He was an alcoholic. He beat me repeatedly until my back bled and I’d watch the blood go down the drain in the shower. I came to Laeslorde to forget about my past. It was hard for me to live with my abusive dad. I had found out that my mom was the sister of King Mærsen, and she had suggested Hazel, my best friend, to be sacrificed to Sgilvard.”

Her voice was bitter. Cassidy was stunned by how similar she and Erika were. They both had wanted to forget about their pasts by coming to Laeslorde, and they had endured terrible hardships.

“Sometimes I wonder if it was really worth it,” Erika mumbled. Cassidy strained to hear her. “Sometimes I think that maybe things would be easier if I had stayed in the mortal world. I just want a place where I can belong, somewhere I’m not different and people make fun of me.” She sighed. “For once I want to be normal. I’ve never had that opportunity, and maybe I never will.”

Cassidy hesitated before speaking. “You have…you have me. I’ll stay by your side.”

Erika laughed, but it wasn’t a true laugh. It was full of resentment and anger. “You? You’re Cassidy Lawes, the most popular girl in school. You have Amanda and Calvin and all those people who love you and simply want to talk to you. You’re the most powerful spellcaster in Laeslorde. Why would you stick by me?”

“Because I know how you feel.” Cassidy’s voice was earnest. “You heard my story. I know how it feels to be different. Don’t you understand that popularity isn’t all that fun? People always recognize you. I want to blend in, to be ordinary. Sometimes I want to hide in the crowds, not have people part for me. I want to belong just like you. We’re not all that different, you know.”

Erika stayed silent. Cassidy waited for a response, but after four minutes had passed, each second feeling like an hour, she almost thought Erika had fallen asleep. And then Erika spoke.

“I know.”