Inspector Kaye And The Klein Bottle In Apartment Five
an excerpt

Williamsburg, Virginia, Summer, 1967

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." Sean said as he strode out into the cleared half-circle of meadow. The evening sun illuminated his features, casting a faint golden sheen on the white stage makeup he wore. "Tonight, as the sun sets on another fine summer's day, I shall show you the secrets of the stars, those mysteries that have been revealed to me and me alone. I shall delight you with illusions, confuddle you with connundrums, and shock you with feats of daring that the faint of heart might fall aswoon upon the witnessing."

He paced over to the left 'wing' of the audience, stopping to loom over an elderly woman. "You, ma'am. What is your name?" he asked, voice resonant.

"Gertrude," the matron said in a thick Southern accent, smiling at the young man. "And you don't have to talk loud on my behalf. My eyesight and my knees may be bad, but my hearing is excellent."

Sean beamed. "Well that's wonderful, Madam Gertrude. I have in my repertoire, as Magister Magestrix, a surefire cureall for aching knees. But I suspect your insurance won't cover my procedure." That got him a few scattered laughs from the audience, and he raised a white-gloved hand to quiet them.

"I believe, good worthies, that this feat of legendermain and physical transcendance is best done on my lovely assistant. May I introduce to you, one and all, the Effervescent Evelyn!"

Evelyn stepped out from behind the flimsy screen hiding the steamer trunk full of magic props, feeling anything but effervescent while dragging the olive-green folding card table from Uncle Jed's garage. It certainly didn't match her pale green dress, which was supposed to be a dryad's costume, but she felt horribly underdressed and hot and stuffy at the same time; there was also a construction-paper autumn leaf out of place behind her neck, and it kept itching at her. But she curtseyed when she reached the marked line in the grass, and gave the parents and friends in their Sunday best her brightest smile.

As she and Sean had practiced, she managed to unfold the legs with some semblance of a flourish, and with a graceful spin, she set the table down on the ground, and whipped off her flower-patterned cloak and spread it over the top of the table with the distinctive 'snap' of plastic sheeting. She pirouetted back to the screen, the ballet lessons she'd taken when she was six coming in handy, and she reversed the movement bearing a short stool, which she placed behind the table and covering tablecloth, straightening back up a moment later with arms held high. The audience applauded for her again.

"Evelyn and I shall demonstrate that the legbone is not always connected to the hipbone. For the best way to stop feeling those arthritic pains, as you know, is to cut off the pain at the source...."