Troupe Cafe
an excerpt

Skylar ignored the nervous shaking of his fingers as he did up his buttons. Why did he even want to impress these people? They'd made a fool of him in front of their customers, and they'd somehow talked him into even trying something he had no interest in. Why was he so nervous that he would fail?
"You ready, Sky?" Sam asked through the door, her voice ripe with excitement.
"Almost." Skylar called back, stopping at the second button from the top and pulling up his jeans.
When Skylar left the dressing room and found himself nervously crossing the threshold into the main of the cafe, he noticed that the large crowd had disappeared from the last time he'd been there. The two albino girls, Nemo and the erastes, and the long haired man were standing there, but there were a few others. The other two girls with them looked like flappers, from the old 1920s movies. Another three men were standing with them. One of them wasn't very old at all. He looked to be even younger than the erastes. His eyes, however, did not look young at all. The other two men looked as though they would be best friends on the streets. They had business suits on, covering their figures, and tap shoes on their feet. Something about the two of them, standing arm in arm, was different from what Skylar had ever seen.
The two businessmen smiled and stepped forward, seating themselves at a table between Skylar and the rest of the group. They looked at him expectantly, one of them tapping his cigarette packet on the table.
"We want to see you work." Viktor said, his green eyes glittering like emeralds.
Skylar looked at the two business men and shuffled nervously from foot to foot. He'd never put himself on show like this before. Was he supposed to take their orders, like a regular waiter? Was he supposed to dance on their table like a stripper, or sit on their laps like a common harlot?
He could feel their impatience as he approached, his hands shaking terribly as he pulled the notepad from the pocket of his too tight jeans. "Can I take your order?" He asked.
Skylar heard a laugh and saw the youngest looking one smirking at him. He could feel his cheeks flush as he tried to pay attention to the two men he was supposed to be serving.
"Sure..." Said the man closest to him, "I'll take a clueless blond. On. My. Lap."
Before the words properly registered, Skylar found himself sitting on the other man's lap, facing him. His heart jumped into override as he panicked. He tried to jump up, but strong hands held him still.
"There." Viktor said, satisfied. "That's the blush."
The others made noises of awe as the hands released Skylar and he went flying out of the man's lap and onto the floor. He stood up, heat rising to his face in anger, ready to kill that arse, Viktor Nemo.
"We need to show you the ropes, though..." Viktor said, waving his hand to someone who was standing along the curtained wall to his left.
The curtains rose to reveal a neatly compact stage. When Viktor had called it a stage, he should have mentioned that they had one.
Skylar followed the group of them to the stage and followed Viktor alone onto the stage. Viktor turned to him and pulled him close. Skylar was getting really sick of being yanked and pulled around in that cafe.
"Can you dance or sing?" Viktor asked, his lips close to Skylar's.
Honestly, Skylar had never given it any thought. He'd never tried to dance or sing. They had just never been that important to him. Now, he wondered if it was a prerequisite to acting. He also wondered if this cafe was really set to be a musical.
"What song should we sing?" Viktor asked, smiling. "I'll let you pick, but make it well known. I'm not as learned in left of center."
Skylar blushed and tried to think of a fairly well known song he could sing. He had honestly never been so into music. What song could they possibly sing that they would both know?
"Nothing?" Viktor laughed, putting his hand on Skylar's waist. "Then I suppose we'll dance and you can sing whatever song you choose. I promise Michel can find it."
Skylar looked over and saw the man with the long hair standing by a large set of speakers with a very small mp3 player. The screen behind him was showing the list as he browsed through the available songs. Each one lighting up as the selection bar moved downward.
"I... I know Wicked..." Skylar said, blushing slightly. He saw a bit of spark appear in Viktor's eyes, but he was scared to think of what it could be.
He felt his heart jump as "As Long as You're Mine" began to play and they began to dance. Skylar was a step behind at first, but caught the rhythm fairly quickly. It took him much longer to stop watching where his feet were going and focus on the audience and the song he was supposed to sing. When he did start focusing on the music and the audience, the words and their magic came shooting from his lips.
His softer tones contrasted perfectly with Viktors tones, which were hard and raspy and perfect for that song. Skylar had listened to the song many times before, mostly with Sam, but he had never experienced it like this. He sighed and felt himself falling into the moment with the taller man, listening to the voice coming unbidden from his own lips and the voice powerfully expelled from deep within Viktor.
The others drank it in as if dying of thirst. When the song finished, they came to a stop and Skylar felt the hand on his waist curl further around him, holding him tightly. For a moment, he could have sworn he felt the hand shake.
After a moment of stunned silence, the group of them applauded, staring up at him. Skylar blushed, feeling the light chuckled air brush against his temple.
"Not bad at all..." Viktor said, silkily. "Train you up a bit, and you'll be just fine."
Skylar could have sworn he heard Sam express her glee from the audience. After such a performance, he couldn't help but be pleased himself. This might be a good thing, after all.
"Of course, there will be our own songs to sing..." Viktor said, taking Skylar by the hand and leading him from the stage.
"So you write music as well as smut?" Skylar asked, raising an eyebrow.
"God No!" Viktor gasped, curling his lip in a sneer, "That would be awful!"
The others laughed loudly, apparently imagining what it would be like for their leader to write music. The taller man with the long hair smirked and shook his head before turning back to his music player.
"Michel writes all the music. That's the part he plays in our group." Viktor explained with a smile. "And Frank, Jack, and Krill work in the kitchen."
"It's Kris." the shorter boy said, rolling his eyes at Viktor.
"Everyone makes their own magic here." Kitty said, smirking at the shortest member of the group, "And everyone is family."
Family sounded nice. Skylar hadn't gone to see his family in six months, hadn't spoken with them in two weeks. This family would be everyday. This family would be together. This family sounded really nice.
Sam made her way back to his side, bouncing on her heels. Skyler could only imagine the things his best friend would be telling people. Her roommate was working in the Cafe le Troupe, the unrequitted love of Viktor Nemo. He cringed to think of the things that would be said about him around town. Would this job be good enough to get him others, afterward? Would it hurt him in getting other jobs? Would everyone think of him as the character he would be playing here?
If they did always think of him like that, what about this job was really acting?
Sam's hand brushed his and he looked at her smiling face. He had to convince himself that it was worth it, somehow. Her happiness may not be enough right now, but maybe if he were happy too...
"Our next rehersal is saturday night, friend." Michel said, his voice deeper than Skylar had expected, "Right here. You'll learn your part, then."
Sam thanked them a million times more than Skylar did, as they made their way to the door. What was it about this place that made her so happy? What was it about him working there that would make her so happy?
"This is so great!" Sam cried as she hopped into the passenger seat. "I can't believe they're gonna let you in!"
Skylar looked over and saw the happy blush high up on her cheeks. He couldn't just tell her no after all the effort she'd put into this setup. He forced a smile and pulled out of the driveway, taking one last look at the building he would never see the same way again.
When they got back to the home they shared, Skylar feigned tiredness and retreated to his room as quickly as he could. He knew his lack of assurance would show at some point and he didn't want his Sam to be crushed when it did. He needed to think about this, but he doubted he would be able to think about it clearly, knowing how happy Sam would be with one posibility.
He sat down on the bed and let gravity take care of the rest. His shoes stayed on his feet, and his feet dangled off the bed, but the rest of him was relaxed and comfortable and, strangely, tired. Being wrapped around someone's finger all day was more tiring than it looked.
He sighed and opened his eyes, looking up at the textured ceiling. He'd experienced good things and bad things, but he couldn't remember any other experience that he couldn't place.
"Viktor Nemo..." He said, the name tasting sweet on his lips. Did it even matter what he thought of this opportunity? Did he really think he had any choice of whether or not to take it. If Sam didn't threaten him, Viktor, strangely controlling Viktor, would manipulate him into it.
His eyes drifted closed on thoughts of the green eyed menace. The choppy black hair, the eyes sparkling like jewels, the full lips he couldn't not want to nibble on. The perfectly raspy, deep voice that accompanied his own so well.
When he woke, he wished he hadn't fallen asleep on such thoughts. Memories of dreams remained, rough hands on his cheeks, vice-like grips on his hands, and impossibly full lips against his own. Skylar had never before felt so strongly against going in for an acting job. He laughed at himself and rolled out of bed, dragging half the bedclothes with him.
He could smell the coffee brewing in the kitchen and the banging of pans as Sam dug through various cabinets. He took off the clothes and shoes he'd fallen asleep in and wrapped his robe around himself. If she saw him on his way to the shower, he didn't want her to see that he'd barely made it to the bed before passing out.
Skylar wondered if his dreams, his strange new thoughts of another man, were all planned by Viktor. Were they pushing him into his new role? Was he supposed to actually feel as confused as his character was? He certainly hoped not. He didn't think his state of mind could take that kind of personal influence on the role. After all, what would acting be if it affected real life?
He sighed and made his way into their bathroom in the hallway. The room smelled like the girl stuff Sam put on before any date. The special shampoo, body wash, perfume, lotion, and makeup were all strewn across the counters. Sam had definitely spent an hour making herself up that morning.
The shower taps were still warm when Skylar turned them on, releasing the already preheated water. He threw his robe on the floor and climbed into the shower, ready to wash away the evidence of one particular dream he'd had the night before.
When he'd washed up, he climbed out and threw his towel back around himself. He left the girl smells in his wake as he headed back to his bedroom. Any more time with the coating of perfume in that bathroom and he would surely have puked.
"When you're done getting ready, you need to eat!" Sam called, her voice strict. "You skipped out on dinner last night!"
Skylar quickly dressed and combed his unruly blonde hair, butterflies slowly hatching in his stomach as the clock ticked down to the next rehearsal, and the next time he would see Viktor Nemo.
When he finally left his room, he could hear Sam's impatient mumbling from the kitchen. This was nothing new, really, but for some reason it was putting him slightly on edge. He entered the kitchen cautiously and found her leaning against the table with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. Skylar tried to ignore her and reached for the cup of coffee on the table, sipping from it lightly.
"I heard you last night." Sam said, smirk widening, "So I made you a cake!"
The blue eyed menace stepped aside and showed a large cake the shape of a penis. Skylar stared at it in shock for a moment, his eyes moving of their own volition all the way along the word Congratulations written on the shaft and to the patch of chocolate shavings covering the icing of the round balls. The monster looked as though she had done everything imaginable to make it tempting despite its shape. White cake with a thin layer of buttercream icing, and, from what he could see at the circumsized tip, a creme filling.
"What the hell?" Skylar blurted, still staring at the phallic pastry. "Where did you get a Dick Mold!?"
"Had it for a while..." She said, leaning back. "Remember, three brothers?"
"That doesn't make it better!" He howled, agast. "Surely, your brothers wanted boob cakes!"
She laughed, shaking her head. "They got me the pan. At least it came in handy!"
Skylar sighed and took another drink of coffee, looking at the confection he was sure she would make him eat for breakfast.
Sam grabbed a banana from the fruit bowl next to her and pushed it into the cake, just under the balls, and the cream shot out of the tip enough to dribble off the plate and onto the table. Skylar let out a noise that was half between a gag and a laugh and turned away from the monstrosity to not shoot coffee from his nose.
"Mmmm Prostate!" She said, pulling the banana out and handing it to Skylar, bits of cream dripping from the tip.
Skylar took the banana and laughed, catching a dollop of icing in his palm. "Shouldn't you be off harassing old people?" He asked, smirking.
"Fine!" She said with a huff, "Eat up, buttercup! And give me that banana!"
Sam took the banana from him and happily began sucking cream from the tip on her way out of the kitchen. Skylar briefly pondered whether he would have found it hot or not if she had not previously shoved it inside a penis cake to make the cake come. His best friend was truly a sick person. And she was being trusted with old people.
Skylar laughed as he cut a piece of cake from the tip, plucking a few of the cadbury pubes from the oposite end. He put them on a plate and stole the rest of Sam's coffee to retreat back to his own room.
"We've got to get thicker walls!" He laughed, walking in and turning on his computer.
He sighed as he opened his email and saw one from his boss. He opened it and immediately got up to go to work a day early.

When his car pulled into the convenience store parking lot, he noticed two things. One, there were no cars. Two, the door was covered with a thick, putty-like substance.
"The hell?" He pulled himself out of his car and looked at the damage up close. The doors were completely covered and, from the crease in the middle, it had also leaked into the inside. He grumbled as he went around to the employee entrance and saw something even stranger. That door was covered in the same substance, just as thick and effective as on the front doors.
Skylar reached for his cell phone and called the one person he could think to talk to at the moment: Mr. Reily, his boss.
When the old man answered the phone, Skylar heard spa music going in the background, blowing bubbles in his gathering anger.
"Mr. Reily... Are you aware that there is no way into the building?" Skylar asked, his eye twitching slightly.
"Yes. That's why I called you to come to work." The old man said, sounding quite relaxed about the situation, "I knew if anyone could get into that building, it would be you."
Skylar stood with his jaw hanging for a good half minute. He took the phone away from his ear and shook his head, as though trying to rattle something into place.
"What, sir!?" He asked, shocked. Mr. Reily was supposed to work that morning, not him. Why was he the one there to get into the building and clean up the obvious vandalism?
"I had more pressing matters to attend to this morning," He groaned. Not a bad groan, either. "And I emailed you to see if you would come up and take care of the situation."
Your building is vandalized... Skylar thought in shock, trying to puzzle things together, More important matters...
"Sir." Skylar's mouth said, without much say from his brain, "I quit."
He heard the gasp on the other end before he closed his cell. Seemed like he had the day off as well.
Skylar drove home leisurely, cut himself another slice of dick and went back to his computer. It looked like a nice day of minesweeper and webcomics ahead of him. Furthermore, it looked like he had no choice on whether or not to take the acting job.
Yeah, money was important.
Skylar heard Sam come in and leaned back in his chair. The scrape of a knife on a plate told him that she was partaking of penis. He climbed out of his chair and headed to the kitchen, slightly cowed by the event with his dayjob.
"I see you weren't too squeamish to eat it." Sam said with a laugh, sticking a creme covered finger in her mouth.
"I'll be working in a Harem, soon..." Skylar replied with a shrug, "I hardly have right to be squeamish about anything."
Skylar watched as Sam took a large bite out of the penis cake, her eyes glazing over blissfully. "I thought you were gay..." He said, smirking at her as she choked on the creamy cock.
"I'll have you know I am bi!" She said, her mouth still full, "Everyone likes a good cock now and again!"
Skylar laughed and stole a finger full of butter creme icing as he leaned agaisnt the counter. "Love the pubes, by the way."
"Cadburry eggs!" she said after swallowing her bite of cake. "They're the best! I heart them!"
"Especially for shaving into pubic hair." Skylar said, plucking one from the icing, "Nothing curls quite as well as cadburry eggs."
"Hey! That's where the creme came from!" She admonished, whiping a bit off the edge of the plate and sticking it in her mouth.
"Yes, yes..." Skylar rolled his eyes at her, "The fat ladies should be calling any minute for the recipe."
Skylar cut himself another piece of cake, from the bottom this time. He looked inside and found two layers within. The outer layer was white like the rest, while the inner layer was a strange pale creme, and of a very different consistency.
"The testes are torte." Sam said with a grin, looking down at the denser cake within the external layer.
"You are a freaking wonder, Sam." Skylar said, taking a bit of the torte and sticking it experimentally in his mouth.
The torte was thick and moist, like he was sure Sam thought a bare testi should be. He laughed and cut a three layer slice from the cake and tried them together. The yellow torte, white cake, and butter creme icing tasted rather good together, but the texture together was quite odd. The texture of the torte dominated the rest, and the taste of the icing made it perfect.
"So you've decided to take the acting job?" Sam asked, sitting down in the wooden chair next to the table. "Have you talked to Mr... um..."
"Reily..." Skylar helped, moving the cake around on his plate, "And I quit."
"I saw the putty..." Sam said, looking at him suspiciously.
"The reason I quit." Skylar shrugged, a smile crossing his lips lightly, "Reily skipped out and left me to deal with that."
Sam surprised him by not blowing up at that. He looked down at her and saw the thoughtful expression on her face. Surely, she wasn't so suprised that Mr. Reily would skip out on his responsibilities. Skylar had been running that store for nearly a year.
"Who do you think would have done that?" Sam asked, looking up, "Even the employee entrance was gummed..."
Skylar bit his cheek to keep from laughing. Sam had gone to his job to see him? He shrugged his shoulders and took a bite of penis before heading back to his room. Something about Sam going to see him felt like a time bomb about to go off. He really didn't want to be in the room when it did.
"Don't forget to practice service!" She called after him, a pleasant smile on her face.
Skylar had forgotten that part completely. After how well the singing number had gone, he'd forgotten how bad the begining of his tryout had been.
"We may need to go up there tonight." Skylar said softly, "So I can observe..."