Alright, why do the parents, engaged people and married people have a thread here but not us awesomely unattached single people? :D And by single I don't mean "in a relationship but not engaged/married/etc" I mean like "I can pack a bag tonight, be in a wild city tomorrow, snog hotties at clubs and not leave behind any serious obligations/significant others". THAT single. Like not even close to being taken. Divorced and separated people are totally part of this thread too though.
Ever feel like EVERYONE your age is taken? Or at least the one you have a crush on? Or maybe you're really cool with being unattached and having one-night stands or something.
For me, I'd say it's a mixed blessing. On the one hand, I LOVE the freedom and feel like the world is my oyster. I love the psychological power of knowing that if life is too horrible in Rochester, I can just hitch-hike to somewhere else tomorrow and not leave any real obligations behind. Also, the random sex isn't bad. On the other hand, my last crush was a little intense and I think my subconscious is going mental over him still.
Who knows if it's a good thing or a bad thing, but us singles need a thread to not feel left out here! So tell me about your single-ness (and who knows, maybe some of us will get lucky because of this thread)
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4,255 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 04 37
Dude, yes! Singleness! Indeed, I do feel like everyone my age has somebody. Even some of my friends who are younger than me are engaged and married and have (multiple!) kids and I'm like, "WAAAAH stop growing up it's scaring me, guys." It's like I can't talk about my singleness with them because THEY ALL HAVE SOMEONE. It just doesn't work, because somehow, some way, they'll bring up their partner and I'm like, "Ugh, no, the point of the conversation is the awesomeness of the singleness."
But it's nice not having an obligation or an attachment for the time being. There's not that wandering in the back of my mind, "I wonder what such-and-such is up to and maybe I should call them." And apparently, the 20's are supposed to be about finding yourself, and I'm still not entirely sure who I am. Yay, adventure!
26,686 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 07 36
Yay singles!!
4,441 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 07 44
i totally agree, i've been single for almost a full year now and i've never been happier to have no strings attatched! aahh.. the single life.
----------雪が降る
静かな森に
叫び声。。。
～～～
リズより！＾３＾/～
40,282 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 07 50
I have to say that I am single and i go from being happy about it to really disliking it. I honestly couldn't just pack up if I wanted to anyway I have so much crap that I'm attached to right now.
Honestly though EVERYONE I'm friends with are in a relationship or really close to being in one. It is kinda frustrating because I can't have like single ladies night or anything.
65,661 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 09 29
I've been single all my life except for two months when I was 16, and even those two months were... well, not very impressive.
Everyone tells me there are lots of advantages to being single, but I have to say I'm growing kinda frustrated - I'd just like to know what it's like, being in a relationship, and sometimes I really wonder if I'll ever find out.
----------Those who want to make dreams come true must dream deeper and be wider awake than others.
-Karl Foerster
3,771 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 12 42
Haha I feel like everyone my age has somebody too and they are all growing up and leaving me behind. it's feels awkward! i've been single more often than not and definitely need more ppl to hang out with that are about the "awesomeness of the singleness" :)
41,619 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 14 11
I love being single. The lack of being so attached at this time in my life is so nice-not having to worry about a significant other.
36,041 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 17 07
This is a great thread! All the threads about people being much more grown-up than me were getting old.
I'm lucky that I've got a good mix of single and not-single friends, and even those in relationships are still cool to hang out with 99% of the time. Its been a long time since I've been in a serious relationship, but while I'm not averse to the idea its not a high priority right now. I'm pretty happy where I am right now.
Unfortunately I haven't got the total freedom to just up and move anywhere at the drop of a hat, but I like where I live so thats not really a problem either.
Best thing about being single in November though: no girlfriend wondering why I'm ignoring her to write 50,000 words!
5,661 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 18 27
Also single, for the past year and a half or so. Recently saw my ex on Crime Stoppers, apparently he's a wanted felon now. Yay? Makes me think I got out of that relationship in a timely manner...
Part of me enjoys being single (can flirt with whoever I want, no romantic obligations to anyone) but part of me is not a fan. I guess I'm at the point where if someone great comes along, I'm all for it, but I'm not going out looking for that person. My last relationship (which was also my first) really made me re-evaluate what I wanted out of my life and who I wanted to be. I realized that I'm not going to compromise anything about myself for anyone else, so right now I guess I'm at a point where I'm figuring out exactly who that uncompromised person is and where she's going.
I am now at the point though where my friends are all starting to get engaged/married/pregnant, and I'm like, "Wait a second, could you slow it down a little? Let me catch up!" Not that there's anything wrong with being single, but I just feel a little left in the dust when everyone else has their significant other and are living together and are having kids... you don't relate to those people the same way as you relate to other single people, I guess.
----------"I don't much care where--" said Alice.
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat.
"--so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.
"Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."
6,042 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 19 11
I too am single. And also feel like all my friends have someone. Because most of them pretty much do. It makes hanging out a little difficult, because they all always want to spend time with their significant others.
Thankfully none of my friends have made the jump of getting married, but a few of them are already talking about it, so it won't be too far down the line.
I have a love-hate relationship with being single. I enjoy the fact that I don't have to focus on anyone else other than myself, and that I'm figuring out who I am without the pressures of someone else (I feel like one of my friends has completely changed who she was since she's gotten into her current relationship. It makes me kind of sad.), so I feel like I'm getting to know who I am and what I want without someone else maybe messing with that. I'm a dreamer, I have lots of plans for what I want out of my life, so I'm glad that I have the freedom right now to be able to do what I want without someone else maybe holding me back (unless he wanted the same things then obviously there wouldn't be an holding back or whatnot).
But it does get a little lonely. Sometimes I just wish I had someone to cuddle with and just enjoy spending time with. Last relationship I had was prior to high school (and therefore I don't classify it as a real relationship). I've yet to have my first kiss. That to me is kind of depressing. XD
10,748 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 20 37
single. not sure if i'm loving it or not right now really. y'see i'm good. i don't even notice it at all most days but then...y'know that though pops into your head and you just picture that one person and your like. wow i would give up the singel life for them. yah. and then you realize that....you haven't met them yet or you just met them that day.
so eh i'm here
52,066 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 20 44
I've been single my entire life. I've never even had a girl friend, and it's actually starting to take it's toll. I feel like I'm slowly losing my mind. I see no advantages to being single at this point in my life though, as I'm too broke to do anything that would be easiest alone. I work for room and board and am happy with it, but it has it's own problems.
But yeah, it really does seem that everyone my age is taken, not my type, or too far away.
----------A Man Must Be Swift Of Blade, To Thrust Upon A Foe, And Sharp Of Tongue, For Not All Adversaries Are Of The Blade.
2,033 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 22 32
Oh ho! Barring the inclination for split second travel decisions, I'll submit my hand and relate (to the best of my ability) with the 'no strings attached' gathering we have here. While I admit being in the bachelorhood department is a rather swanky scene when seasoned with the right words, I confess to the freeloading loneliness that lounges indolently on my couch. I was always more of a romantic myself, and it's hard to have wild gallivanting passionate fantasies with the random one-night stands and odd flare of a relationship that seems to dot my recent past. Give me the ole 'settle down with a progeny and wife', life is a fun enough rollercoaster to dip and rise on...but hell if I want to be shaking my lonely ass around in some dump nightclub at the age of forty or higher. Not saying some people won't have a time and a half catching the bull by the horns and settling in for the long run, just saying those people aren't me.
Willing to admit one of my goals is to have a good family...cause if I want to leave a mark on the world....I'd like it if that mark could leave one of its own. Soon enough, I'll tag history from present day to 3012...provided 2012 doesn't kill us first.
Way I see it, if life is about experience...then we should all experience a long meaningful relationship at least once. Like skydiving or swimming with sharks. May be dangerous, but you won't regret it in the long run.
Don't quote me though...I've seen...things...and at the risk of debasing my entire tirade...some joinings should NOT have happened and leave scars wider then the Pacific Trenches.
So I say, So I say.
*Looks up*
...Odd isn't it? What caffeine and a sudden infuse of muse will do to a fellow's writing style.
11,111 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 22 39
I have been single way to long and i would like to know the feeling of not being single. I know someday I will but i have no idea when or where. Singleness kind of rocks sometimes but more often then not I hate it!
----------2009:The Powerful Six and The Tower of Death Doom and Stuff (I have no idea the name to me just like story did)
50,030 / 50,000
Nov 3, 2009 - 22 45
Been single for about two years now, and I waver back and forth on whether or not I like it. Living purely for oneself can be pretty sweet, but it's also pretty lonely and I don't have any prospects that I know of - everyone else in this city is locked into relationships, it seems.
27,526 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 00 15
Happily single.
----------Day #1 of 30 Days, 30 Covers
0 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 01 49
Word.
The question isn't so much "single or involved?" so much as "involved with whom?" Meaning, in my opinion, we're all involved with someone, be it your unrequited crush, the really-great-friend-you-can't-admit-you're-in-love-with, or the ex that you wish you could have back. Not having a relationship is simple, liberating and definitely beats having a crummy relationship. Then again, we all get lonely and find ourselves sacrificing that freedom in exchange for comfort...how else would we know what we're looking for if we didn't date and have relationships that fizzle, burn up or explode? How else would we appreciate our freedom?
I've been single much more often than I've been attached in my life, and though I enjoy it at this age, I don't want to stay this way forever. I doubt that anyone does. Not having to explain yourself when you come home after staying out all night is, however, absolutely priceless.
Good thread. Sexy single writers unite!
51,416 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 02 12
Been single for over a year. I'm also the only male in a work group of all females and while we're undergraduate medical students, it's allegedly relatively easy for girls to pick up dates but not so easy for guys, whereas once we enter the workforce, it's the other way around. So yes, I do feel that everyone my age is taken, because in my immediate circle, they are!
I'll also admit that I've had a number of involuntary crushes and they're also all taken. Not necessarily happily so but while classes and exams dominate our schedules in the critical final year, they're not going to change the status quo if they haven't broken up already.
And from that it should be fairly clear that I don't get out all that often, so I'm certainly not getting any! Nor, at this point, should I be, since I'm trying to cram NaNo into ten days so I can finish studying for my exams starting at the end of the month :P
In the bigger scheme of things, it seems very likely that I will remain date-less until the end of next year, when I graduate. Regardless of whether or not I'm happy about this, it's far more practical.
36,767 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 03 09
Hi!
Happy to join this thread of very recognisable posts... I've been single all my life and starting to get pretty annoyed by it I must say. Luckily I've got a group of friends who are also single, but every time one of them has a second date with someone I'm thinking: oh no...what if I'll be the only one left who is single?!
On the other hand I don't want to focus on it too much because that makes it rather difficult to have fun and relax, right?
But I have to say that I always wonder where people meet their other half. I don't seem to meet anyone who is even close to someone I could date... Problem is that I have a job and hobbies where I'm mostly working with an all female group of people so that doesn't help...
And here's another thing I wonder about: do you also have the feeling that you are so used tot living alone that if you do meet someone eventually it's gonna take an awful lot of work to adust yourself to living together?
But let's end with something happy: let's not focus on what we don't have but on what we do have. We can do whatever we want. If we want to write all day and not say one word to anyone because we don't want to mess up our inspirational energy, we can do that! :-)
Keep up the good spirits, singles out there!!
----------"A good novel tells us the truth about its hero, but a bad novel tells us the truth about it's author"
- G.K. Chesterton
Volg mijn nano-blog op www.schrijvenonline.org/nanowrimo
44,293 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 03 14
Singleness! I'm not really looking either. I guess that's a good thing?
59,913 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 04 04
Yay more single people!!! I agree with pretty much all the comments here - most of the time, being single in your 20s is pretty awesome. Of course there are days when it sucks majorly, but as far as I can see it's mostly a positive thing. And it's also good for NaNo progress, which is naturally the most important thing. ;-)
23,438 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 04 15
Personally I'm actually over being single.
I know I know. Your thinking "WHAT? HOW?" Well It's just boring. And since I'm being honest, I miss make up sex. Well not really but seriously it is nice to have someone to wrap ya arms around when ya watchn a movie or something just cause you can ya know. Can't really do that with a one night stand or a casual bedroom buddy.
Ah well. Not gonna fix it sitting on my ass here. But then again I could do some more writing...
----------"So why, I ask, it just doesn't make much sense
That a man of my stature should have to wear a dress
I mean what, may I inquire, were you thinking on that day
When you conjured up for a man like me a robe that looks so gay"
33,249 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 05 44
Yeah! Young, free and single! I'm not looking for anything eihter... I've got two kind of friends. The ones that are in a relationship and those who are single and cry about it all the time.
Get yourself a live and being single is great!
33,706 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 06 25
I'm all of the above! Young, free and single, and I'm ok with that!
----------The Paperbag Writer - www.thepaperbagwriter.wordpress.com
"You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star." -Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
35,532 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 07 02
Great idea for a thread! Yay!
I'm single and glad of it. For some reason, when you say that to people they always--or often--seem to assume that you're just covering or something, but I genuinely love being single. It's how I've spent most of my life so far. I don't mind having attachments, what gets me about relationships is the lack of free time. Or rather, the assumption/demand that you spend all your free time with your "other half".
The phrase "other half" also annoys me. I'm a whole person by myself!
I love having all this time to myself and not having to worry about someone else. Freedom ahoy! :D
----------NaNo 2008: Rogue Entanglements (51,026 words)
NaNo 2009: Der Drachenreiter
"Write who you are."
35,532 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 07 05
And yes... most of my friends seem to be either in a relationship/engaged/married or single and always crying about it. Very few people seem to see it the same way I do. I'm twenty-two, the thought of marriage or kids scares me. My last boyfriend brought it up a few times and my first response was always "Argh no run away!" because, I have so much other stuff to do first! I'm too young for commitment!
----------NaNo 2008: Rogue Entanglements (51,026 words)
NaNo 2009: Der Drachenreiter
"Write who you are."
38,020 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 07 10
I'm very happy to be single, but would quite like to go on some random dates with nice men without having to commit to them.
Is that really too much to ask? In London where there should be lots of young and willing men? Apparantly so! x
15,808 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 08 57
Wow, a place where it's 'okay' to be single without being questioned or looked strangely upon like your a spinster !! This could possibly be my most favouritest (yes I know it's not a word!) thread on the forums!
Big up for the Singles peeps. I lean more towards the 'seriously deliriously happy to be unattached and running on the singles circuit'. Even one off dates don't interest me, I just like me, myself and I though it gains me the nickname of spinster but hey, as long as I'm happy who cares about conforming to other peoples perceptions right?
The 'dating' side of me must live through my characters though because I always like them to be moderately happy in their relationships, heck yes I'm a 'happily ever after or for at least the next few years' kind of gal when it comes to writing, though I'm not writing a chick lit for Nano so who know what will happen with my character, she's sort of in the middle of relationships and discerning what she actually wants in life and relationships.
and now I'm rambling in my usual rambling way. All I wanted to say was
BIG UP THE SINGLE PEOPLE!
----------Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.
-Robert Frost
1,062 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 09 00
Single and just fine with it! Though I'd be just fine finding someone, too. I'm just not in the best place to find a relationship, though; it's a smallish, fairly religious town and I'm a lesbian, so it's not like I'd even have any place to start looking, and it's safer to just assume "straight until proven otherwise" around here to avoid flirting with the wrong person. No one's ever been violent about things that I know of, but I could do without the lectures and the giggles and the "ewwww"s, too.
/tangent BUT YES. I'm okay with being single, at this point! Eventually I'm gonna want to find some girl, maybe more than one (also making the idea of a relationship mildly difficult so far? being polyamorous), but I'm okay with that being a while from now. I have other stuff I can be doing, and it's all awesome anyway, because I rock all by myself. <3
1,227 / 50,000
Nov 4, 2009 - 15 43
lol. My NaNoWriMo is totally about a chick who is single in a sea of married/commited people. And she's that way because I'm that way. All my friends went and got hitched or are darn near it with their sig-os, and while I'm not ready for the ball and chain, I definately spend a lot of time as a third wheel. And I have gone and packed up and moved cross country because I had no significant ties to worry about. So I can relate to feeling like you can disappear when you want to. Feels good, but there comes a time when you want someone to come home to...