Alright, so I am trying to stay in a very appropriate nature and language for my book. Unfortunately with one of the characters, I tried to find another way for him to say this line that would have the same passion and meaning, but I couldn't seem to get another word. So the thing in context is:
“God!” Caleb scoffed rolling his eyes and looking away from her. “What is God anyway? A self-righteous and egotistical bastard in my eyes. What right does he have to say what we should and shouldn’t do? What right does he have to offer salvation to some but snatch it away from others? What a God you serve.”
Does that sound okay? I don't feel comfortable having the word bastard in their, but at the same time, I can't find another word that is right. Help please?
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41,581 / 50,000
Nov 8, 2009 - 03 17
I think it depends on your target audience and possibly target publisher as some may simply want no swearing at all. You could try 'Self-righteous egomaniac' instead, which I think gets the same idea and feeling across while avoid the word bastard.
----------Yes the pic is a stavechurch, in case anyone wondered!
31,925 / 50,000
Nov 11, 2009 - 14 31
Well with that matter, I don't really have a target audience or publisher. I just write to write. And while egomaniac is a good word for an insult, it doesn't have the passion that is being portrayed by the character. And that's my problem. As much as I would love to simply exchange the word it doesn't feel right to take it out or to keep it. And so I don't know what to do.
From the perspective of fellow Christians, could some of you please give me your opinions on this?
----------40,308 / 50,000
Nov 11, 2009 - 14 50
Then just write. If it become an issue later, deal with it then.
----------2009 -- A Hero Over His Head
2008 -- {sat out}
2007 -- {sat out}
2006 -- Power in the Blood (won)
2005 -- CUL8R (lost)
2004 -- {sat out}
2003 -- Nowhere Man (won)
2002 -- Soulmates (won)