Excerpt: Knights and Casters

It was by sheer coincidence that we happened to meet again. Casilde was feeling ill again and had sent me out into the village to get her more medicines. I rounded the corner and literally ran straight into the very last person I wanted to see: Eri. I immediately froze on the spot, even though I should have ducked my head and moved past, hiding my face and preventing the encounter from happening altogether. He froze too, at first, though it seemed as though he had been jarred from his thoughts more than anything. He then opened his mouth automatically in apology before actually noticing who I was. For what seemed a long time, he openly gaped at me and I ducked my head, suddenly feeling guilty.

It wasn't fair that I would feel this way. Eri had abandoned me and I wanted to see him hurt. I wanted him to feel just as awful as I did when he – my brother of all people – betrayed my trust. Seeing the unrestrained relief and happiness and hurt and sadness all rolled together in his expression made me feel ashamed of myself for leaving him. It hadn't been right when he left me to fight alone while he saved Samantha, but I hadn't been right in running away from the hospital either.

I was so consumed with my thoughts that I barely even noticed when it was that Eri had dropped to his knees and pulled me into a crushing hug. After not seeing him at all for months it all felt incredibly surreal. For the first time in a while...I was really, truly happy and even though he was the last person I wanted to see, I still wanted so badly to hug him back.

But I couldn't.

“I'm so sorry, Kiki,” he was muttering into my shoulder and I could hear how tightly constricted his throat was. Eri sounded like he was on the verge of tears, and I have never known my brother to cry. It would only make my next words all the more difficult to say.

Steeling my resolve and swallowing hard to keep my voice steady, I finally spoke. “I told you to leave me alone.” Both of us flinched at the harsh tone in my voice. Even so, I pulled up all the hatred and pain I could muster, remembering the awful bitterness I felt when I had first left Halcyon and all the promises my brother made that he'd broken in a single moment. I almost hated him again and was completely ready to unleash a torrent of horrible words that would make him leave me for good when he spoke again.

“Please, don't.” I immediately faltered and completely lost the momentum I had built up. The way Eri's voice caught in his throat, the quiet, sad tone of his voice tugged violently on my heart. I couldn't bear to say any more hurtful words, but if I didn't...

Eri would die.

Casilde's words returned and stabbed clean through me. My magic was born of monsters and it was slowly but surely tainting Eri. If I didn't stay away from him, he would eventually become a monster just like my father did. And, just like my father, I would have to kill him. If he stayed with Halcyon, he still would but at the very least it wouldn't be by my hand.

Maybe I was selfish not to tell him all of this. Maybe I believed I would never be rid of him if he knew the truth. Maybe I knew he wouldn't go back to Halcyon if I refused to return with him. Maybe a part of me was still resentful. No matter the case, I firmly shoved against Eri's chest and easily knocked him to the ground. A combination of training with Casilde and his weakened state allowed me to accomplish this and rather than waste more time with words he would not listen to, I ran. I yelled back at him not to follow, even though I had to have known it was pointless, and vanished into the crowd.

Eri gave chase as soon as he was back on his feet but my small size gave me an advantage for once. I could easily slip through the dense crowd and vanish from sight, whereas he had to push his way through. It wasn't long before I lost him completely and returned to the Inn where I was staying with Casilde, only to realize I had completely forgotten her medicine.