Excerpt: If This Be Treason

Mother sat with me working on some embroidery for a while this afternoon while Jonathan and Father were out. I did not wish to tell her Jonathan’s secret, but I did feel a need to talk to her.

“Mother,” I started, and immediately lost my breath. “Might I ask you something?”

“What is wrong, Rachel?” Mother seemed worried as she looked up. I felt guilty for making it sound like I might be in trouble, she has enough to worry about with Father and Jonathan already!

“Oh, it is nothing wrong with me, really,” I said quickly. She nodded and returned to her work. “Well, it is something that worries me, but… Mother, it’s about Father and Jonathan.”

Mother looked up from her embroidery sharply. “What is it about Joshua and Jonathan?”

Mother never calls Father by his name around Jonathan or I. Not unless she is upset.

“I wanted to know…What will happen between them. If independence…The two of them fight so viciously about the issue. I don’t understand. Why is Father so furious with Jonathan about it? Does he despise Jonathan’s view so much?”

Mother sighed. “Darling, it is not just a matter of loyalty. Your father very well has things to worry about in this situation. For instance, what is going to happen when we overthrow British control? Your father says anarchy, but it isn’t necessarily that. There are some bad men ruling locally here, true, but there are also some good men. What will happen without the government we already have, British or no, when it is gone? Who is to say the new government will just be another form of tyranny?”

“So you think that what is happening to the colonies is wrong as well?” I asked. If she did, I would feel so much more comfortable talking to her of this!

“I do not know. I never wanted anything to do with politics, and I never intend to,” she said flatly. “I am merely trying to rationalize the argument your Father shouts at Jonathan by acknowledging what Jonathan says is important.

“But it is more than what goes on about the government Father fears,” she continued. “Think of who your father works for, how we have become so prosperous here in the colonies. The East India Trading Company is not very popular right now, is it? If Patriots are already tarring and feathering tax collectors, what will they do to East India employees? They could attack our home, take our belongings, which your father has worked for, unpopular employer or not, even tar and feather your own father. Our family can suffer by the hands of the Patriots who do not see a bigger picture, and it is in many ways a miracle that hasn’t happened yet. Declaring independence will make it worse, and the chance that our family suffers far more likely.”

“Oh.” I hadn’t thought about that. Father wasn’t only being stuffy about the political end, was he? He fears the change because he is worried about all of us, stiff or no.

“Does this mean Father is a Loyalist because he loves us, and not because of the ideals?” I asked. If that was what he feared, he couldn’t possibly disagree if his family supported the Patriot cause. Jonathan knew the risks, and he was a Patriot after all.

“Oh, it is a major reason, don’t get me wrong darling,” Mother replied. “But he truly does believe in the Crown. Something like this has never happened before, and your father does not like sudden changes. We waited a long time before getting married for that reason. And for all the he wished to be with his family when they moved back to England, he chose to stay because to change where we lived seemed too huge for us. Though if the colonies are changing on him, he might want to go back. To the old ways, to the traditions, to the government he loves. He doesn’t see anything wrong with what the King has done and how he has handled the rebellious colonists. And he truly considers himself a citizen of England, no matter what the colonists say of being Americans more than British.”

Perhaps it is that in the past few years there has started to be this separation between Patriots and Loyalists, but I realized then that I always considered us the colonists and them the British. I gasped at the thought, and immediately pricked my finger badly. Smothering a word a lady should not say, I brought my finger to my mouth.

“So…He and Jonathan are never going to agree on this,” I said. I meant to phrase it as a question, but it really was to confirm what I had learned.

Mother looked sad as she met my eyes.

“No, darling, I don’t think they will.”

Hearing that angers me, and saddens me at the same time. I don’t understand why they must bicker so! Yet, at least now I know what to expect. Jonathan and Father will always disagree on this. And that means that within the next few months, Jonathan will probably leave to enlist. At least now I have time to prepare for that.