[Untitled]
an excerpt

Allan sat back in his chair, taking his glasses off and rubbing the bridge of his nose. The two races sounded quite nice, but what about the rest, the ones on the outer rim? Also, what about the unpopulated planet between Ryushia and Trinia? What was that one like? Sliding his glasses back onto his nose, he opened up the file on the third, unnamed planet. It was just like the primary probe had said, the atmosphere was exactly the same as Earth's, nitrogen, oxygen, argon, carbon dioxide and the rest. The percentages were a tiny bit different than the ones on Earth, but they were so marginal it wasn't worth taking into account. The surface of the planet was 80% water, which was divided into 45% salt water oceans and lakes, and 35% freshwater lakes. The 20% of landmass was made up of 4 large continents, one that was green, lush and filled with rainforests, another that was purely ice, located at the bottom of the planet, a third that was always closest to the sun, it was a desert land with a little green and the fourth was mountainous, mainly brush and scrub land. Despite all of this vegetation, water and landmass, there appeared to be no sign of humanoid or alien life on the entire planet. Obviously, there were the animal life signs, mainly your basic four legged variety and aquatic creatures. But no humans? This was slightly disconcerting, considering that there were clearly ruined buildings in the pictures that Two-Two had brought back for him. He wondered if there was any information from Trinia or Ryushia about it. Searching the files, he couldn't find anything, no history of the unnamed planet, no information on any species that may have come from there and migrated to the other surrounding planets. He looked up to Two-Two who was dozing on his head, still leaning against his shoulders. He jiggled his shoulders up slightly, dislodging her and waking her up quickly.

"Two-Two, what about this planet? The one that is in between Ryushia and Trinia? Why isn't there any information about what species live there? Are there any species down there? If not, why not, what happened to them?"

Two-Two straightened herself up, looking at the screen and thinking for a few seconds. Then a look of recognition dawned across her face.

"Ohhhh! I remember this place. Such a beautiful place, the central continent is the best, it has a rather nice volcano in the middle...The fish are quite big as well. I found one that took a bit of a shine to me. Big as you are Allan. Called him Elvis, seemed like an appropriate name for a big dumb fish."

Allan wasn't listening too closely as Two-Two waxed lyrical about the wonders of this uninhabited planet. He was busy scanning the files a little closer, trying to find anything about the history of this planet.

"A whole population can't just leave no trace...If it was something major these other two planets would know about it..."

"...But the mountains were quite interesting, not composed of basic rock, more like metal, I think the rocks are made up of more naturally occurring metals than the ones on Earth..."

"There has to be something in these reports, why can't I find anything? This is too suspicious to ignore, people will start asking questions, complicated questions I can't answer.."

"The wildlife on the different continents is pretty much the same as here. Few weird and wonderful looking creatures, like the giraffe like one, I think I took a picture of that. It had the long neck of a giraffe but it was covered in purple fur, had this huge head with humongous black velvety antlers. It was so freaky, yet so beautiful at the same time..."

Allan turned around quickly, trying to contain his anger, as Two-Two continued on about the lion-esque creatures that were actually the size of horses with light blue fur, asking her through gritted teeth as calmly as he could about the people of that planet and what had happened to them. Sensing his anger, Two-Two promptly shut up about the wildlife of the planet, and racked her brain for anything that she may had been told by the Ryushians or the Trinians. Then there it was, hidden in one of her back files marked "Tell To Allan As Soon As You Get Back." She wondered why she hadn't moved that forward, and promptly blamed it on one of her processors. Opening the file, the information seemed to flow in front of her eyes, she began to speak as the words appeared, her voice incredibly robotic as if it were a pre-recording.

"That planet has been uninhabited for the past one hundred and seventy six years. The inhabitants were the third of the three humanoid creatures that live in the Elmacres solar system. They were called the Paragins, the planet being called Paragon. Basically human if you cut them open, but they looked remarkably different- no pictures sadly- but that wasn't the problem. They were a trickster race, not to be trusted, they'd been in many wars with the Trinians and in particular the Ryushians..."

She stopped, letting Allan taking all of this information in. When he was done, he nodded, silently, and she continued.

"In what both planets hoped would form a truce, if not long lasting peace, one of the Paragin prince's was engaged to be married to a Ryushian princess. I wasn't given either of their names. The princess went to Paragon to see her betrothed, and what was recorded as an "altercation" took place. The princess was murdered by the Paragin prince, quite horrifically I was told. The Ryushians saw this as the last straw, they had been done over by the Paragins too many times."

She paused, slightly, as the information switched files, the words once again flowing in front of her eyes.

"The Ryushian council met with the Trinians, who served as a sort of peace keeping society at the time. They wanted justice, and the Trinians agreed with them. Then the war started. It was bloody and destructive, with many many losses on either side. Towards the end of it all though, the Ryushians had decided that enough was enough and used their most destructive weapon. It was a biological weapon, attuned to the DNA of the Paragins exactly. When they released it, the Paragins were wiped out. Entirely and totally. Neither the Ryushians or Trinians sent anyone to repopulate the planet. It's been empty ever since."

She finished, blinking slightly as the files went back to where they were stored, looking over to Allan. Allan was sat, his mouth slightly agape, looking a little shell shocked. After a few moments when he realised that Two-Two had finished speaking, he shook his head, pulling himself together.

"They...they just obliterated an entire civilization? Because of a murdered princess? I...Jeez...The Paragins must have been a real race of bastards to end up with that kind of punishment..."

He stared at Two-Two who resolutely and obediently stared back at him. Thinking everything over, he came up with the most logical answer to the astounding, life changing information that he'd just been given.

"Right. I think I'll go for a pint..."

Ch. 3

Allan's favourite watering hole was located, conveniently, seven doors down from his office. It was a small, cosy little place, reminiscent of the old country pubs that seemed to grow out of the ground naturally in rural Neo Britannia. There was a hologrammatic pool table against the back wall, most bars had them now, meant that people couldn't rip the felt or break windows when the cue ball decided it didn't like the table anymore. They also had a hologrammatic darts board, but it was currently out of order- a glitch in the programming caused one of the darts to fly around the bar and refuse to come down.
The bar itself was manned by two people, the owner and his son, and an old, sarcastic robot by the name of Genoox, it came from his serial number GN-X. Genoox hated everything about human life, but had the most extensive knowledge of drinks, which was all he was employed for really. If someone came to the bar asking for a "Random Lightning Float" over ice, it would be Genoox who would mix it expertly, remembering that a proper RLF was made with Abyssinian Quicksilver Rum and not with Albanian Fools Rum, a very common mistake amongst human bartenders. So for this reason, Genoox's rude comments were tolerated with a smile from most of the patrons, knowing that for all the abuse, at least they were getting a decent drink for their dollar.

Allan knew the owner of this place, which was called "The Alchemists Cup", usually affectionately referred to by regulars as "The Cup." He was an old man by the name of Mitchell. His family had been some of the original settlers on the moon, and his brothers were still in the science business, but Mitchell had had no head for that sort of thing, and had opened a pub where the scientists could come and kick back without having to venture to the entertainment district up on Sector Three, thus leaving themselves open for vicious verbal attacks from people enquiring about why, if they were so brilliant, hadn't they invented any number of different devices to make their lives easier? Mitchell's pub was also well known and liked since he served traditional Neo Britannia pub food, albeit sometimes with a twist. Today's special happened to be a Ploughman's Lunch with Martian Cheddar and pickles grown on the dark side of the moon. Entering the pub, Allan and Two-Two made their way over to the bar, Two-Two's hologram was being sustained thanks to a watch that Allan was wearing, and sat down next to one of Allan's fellow EuSep scientists, whose name was Charlie.

"Hey Charlie, hows everything going on your end?"

Charlie looked over to him, away from her drink. She was one of the older scientists at the age of 43, her red hair starting to streak with grey at the temples, her blue eyes hidden away behind a pair of glasses that would have made a jam jar jealous. She shrugged slightly, still wearing her lab coat and a pair of blue denim jeans, picking her drink up that was the tell tale marbled pink and red of a "Deathly Strawberry Dream," a potent, yet surprisingly girly drink.

"Ahhh, s'not much going on down in the Teleport department Allan, we haven't had any major accidents since that bus load of tourists collided with three caravans on Teleport Highway 8 on it's way into Wales last month. It's just been general maintenance, nothing really interesting going on yet." She stopped, taking a mouthful of the sickly sweet alcoholic drink that had been decorated with a little paper umbrella and a cocktail cherry on a stick. "Anyway, hows everything on your end? I see your probe has made it back in one piece, thought I heard something about that on the security radio..." She raised her glass to Two-Two, who smiled back at her. "We going to be shipping people out to the new planet or what?"

Allan looked to Charlie as well as trying, in vain, to get Genoox's attention so he could order a drink. Genoox wasn't paying any attention to him, when Allan and Two-Two had walked in, he'd suddenly become interested with a dripping optic of Albanian Fools Rum. Allan sighed, turning his full attention to Charlie.

"Yes, I got the information about the planet from Two-Two, but, with all respect Charlie, I'm not going to say anything yet. I've got to run it all past council, then I'll make a public address. Last thing we need is unsourced rumours floating around and getting back down to Earth and creating some kind of riotous frenzy. So yes, I have information, and I'll let everyone know soon enough."

He helped himself to a Twiglet from the bowl on the bar and looked over to Genoox again, clearing his throat to get the robots attention. Genoox looked up and directly over to Allan, who opened his mouth to order, just to see Genoox turn his attention back to the rum optic after a few seconds. Snapping a random Twiglet out of frustration, he cleared his throat once again, beginning to yell, as calmly as he could, at the ignorant robot.

"Genoox, I am quite clearly a paying customer who is worth at least twenty seconds of your attention so I can order my drink, receive said drink, pay for said drink, then bloody well drink said drink! Now if you are quite finished observing that dripping optic, which I am sure is quite entertaining for you, I would like to order an alcoholic beverage!!"

Genoox looked over to him, observing him with disinterest, as if he hadn't just dressed him down in front of a room full of scientists. It didn't particularly bother Genoox, he was always being spoken to like that. He made his way over to where Allan, Charlie and Two-Two were sat, stopping in front of Allan and looked at him with uninterested blue LED eyes.

"What drink can I get you, sir?" He asked, mustering the most sarcastic tone he could to his voice, as Allan perused the optics at the back of the bar and the taps at the front. If Genoox could have rolled his eyes as Allan umm'd and ahh'd over the drinks, he would have. Bloody humans and their indecisiveness, it was very irritating. Sighing, he tapped one foot, looking over at Allan.

"I'm sorry, I was assuming, sir, that since you called me you had made a final drinks selection, but now I see I was mistaken. But never fear, sir, I shall waste my precious time, standing here and doing absolutely nothing until you have settled your mind on which drink you would like to consume tonight..."

Allan looked over to Genoox, wishing that he had that robot's sarcasm chip so he could come up with some kind of witty and biting response to the barrage of sarcasm. But sadly, he didn't and all his replied with was "a pint of Dark Ale, a holo grape and nectarine juice and a packet of salted peanuts please..." Which, all things considered, was a reasonable answer, albeit not a witty one. Genoox listened to the order and made his way up to the end of the bar, starting to pour the pint of ale and programming the pub's computer to make up a hologrammatic drink. Allan settled on his stool as a small packet of salted peanuts shot across the bar at high speed, smacking Allan on the side of the head. He almost lost his balance, if it hadn't been for Charlie grabbing his sleeve, he would have ended up on the floor. Reaching down for the peanuts, he righted himself as Genoox brought his drink over, Two-Two's drink materializing in front of her at the same time. Genoox's tone was slightly happier as he asked for the sixteen dollars from Allan, who was muttering under his breath about certain sarcastic bar tending robots who shall remain nameless. After taking the money, Genoox made his way back to the other end of the bar and stayed there, which Allan was glad about, for the time being at least.
There are plenty of things to do in a pub or bar if you happen to find yourself in one. You can talk to your friends about their jobs, who respond in the usual way of complaining about the job and their co-workers/bosses/robots, as well as the lack of parking in Lunar Prime. During this conversation, it is usually considered polite to nod and make noises that sound like you are agreeing with them. The second most popular thing to do in a pub is watch whatever happens to be on the TV at the time, usually either the news or some popular sporting event. On this particular occasion, it was the news, and Allan was rather interested in that. He turned on his stool, leaning his back against the bar, listening into the news cast. It was one coming from Earth, the news reader was stunningly beautiful, her skin made up perfectly and not one hair out of place. The picture next to her head was one of the sun, with what looked like a long red whip coming off of it. Solar flare activity, thought Allan. He was glad that Two-Two had gotten back today, solar flares tended to screw up her guidance system. The last time there had been one and she was coming back from a job he'd sent her on, the flare had knocked the guidance system for six and she'd ended up on the dark side of the moon, embedded in some poor buggers hovercar, that he'd left parked outside of his dome. Not only had Two-Two hurt herself rather badly, Allan had ended up forking out a rather large amount to repair the hovercar as well. He tended to plan he journeys around the solar flare times, making sure she left before one, and that she was due to arrive back either before or after one, so he didn't have to fork out for anymore hovercar repairs.
Putting his attention back on the news, he listened as the news reader spoke about a meeting of the UN. This attracted his attention more so than the solar flare report, and he yelled over his shoulder to Genoox.

"Here, turn the TV up would you, I need to hear this..."

Genoox looked up from his copy of the Lunar Today newspaper, looking to Allan then the TV. He reached underneath the counter he was leaning on and pulled out a small black remote, pointing it at the television. Allan looked rather happy, but then realised the volume was decreasing, the head of the UN on the screen now mouthing words that Allan couldn't hear at all. Growling he looked over to Genoox.

"I said up you simple minded android! I want to listen to the news repor...." He looked back to the screen, the report was over now. "...Oh well thank you Genoox, thank you very much(!)"

Genoox put the volume back to its normal level and returned the remote back to its hole underneath the bar. If he could have smiled smugly at Allan he would have at this point.

"Not a problem sir, I aim to please..."

Raising his finger and opening his mouth to say something amazingly offensive and destructive to the robot, possibly involving his mother, he couldn't seem to make the words form a coherent sentence, so he settle for merely pointing at Genoox, who had turned back to the newspaper, and made some random frustrated noises. Two-Two laughed into her holo juice, shaking her head. She rested a hand on Allan's shoulder.

"Leave it Allan, he's just trying to wind you up, and succeeding brilliantly. If there was anything in the report about EuSep, you'll get a letter soon enough..."