My character is too boring...

Anyone....?

I think the second option might give you more things to explore. Maybe have the quirky uncle give him tips that would mess his game up even more LOL

I think it really depends on the tone you want the book to have and so on.

What's flat about the character?

- Have him lie to himself (I’m writing first person), about not needing friends, then let it shine through that this is what he’s desperate for?
- Have him try to gain friends, but really mess up for himself by being just too eager?

Depends on what you're shooting for. Option 1 seems like it could lend itself to a sadder revelation. To get whacked over the head with the idea of "No Man's An Island".

Option 2 seems like there's alot of humorous situations that can be created. Ever seen "I Love You, Man"? Guy tries to make friends and hilarity ensues? Yeah, like that, only different.

You can also give him a quirk or two, but I think that as you go on with your story, he'll come into his own person. Just keep breathing life into your story.

Actually, your character sounds very realistic and has a lot of potential for growth. Give him experiences, and maybe he will become fuller as he moves through the story. I think option 2 sounds like it would be a really fun story... and there is an option of course, though he "messes up by being too eager" at first, you might find a way for him to actually succeed in the end...

I have a really boring character in my novel too. He's a fat, balding accountant in a clock shop who has no family and no hobbies... I am using him to bring forth back-story, since he's been around for a long time, but I continue to maintain my sanity by having other characters who are important to the story too. And I'm going to throw him into something bizarre and outside of his comfort zone and hope that he changes and grows into someone I can be proud of.

Believe in your character, as though he were a real person, and believe in yourself as a writer, and you'll figure it all out.

Isn't it amazing, how whole worlds just grow out of nothing?

I'm horrible, I'd have his father come back into the story and kill him. Then make the rest of the story following the father. I dunno, seems like either you should suck it up or change it up.

Just wanted to say thanks, to all of you.
Still think my character is a little flat, but all of your advice has been taken to heart (including the last one: I won't bring back/kill the father, but you reminded me to start thinking afresh again), and I feel he's gotten more character with every word now.

Why does everyone who has a character who is outside of the social boundaries make them feel sorry for themselves. Why not have him embrace his solitude and grow with it. It is a wonderful thing and can allow you to discover all sorts of things about yourself. This also opens up what other characters say about the MC, creating all sorts of assumptions that simply aren't true. Give the character a life and let him expand it himself. You are the author, but think of the character as an individual. Not everyone, given an abusive, dead, alcoholic, whatever father becomes morose with a chip on his shoulder moaning away because he has it so bad. Do something different than every other author has done.

I disagree with having someone in that situation enjoy their solitude.

I would almost go as far and claim that barely anyone enjoys solitude regardless of their background. The solitary people I have met in my life have all have grown accustomed to it and they might not have problems, but none of them consciously sought it out. Or if they did so, it was more of a turning their back on the being with people rather than embracing being alone.
Especially someone who solitude has been "forced" on, would not enjoy it imo.

That being said I think your character will go through different stages while having social issues.

He will lie to himself and blame those who are not his friends.
He will blame himself.
He will blame his family.
He will blame life and the universe and everything for being so unfair.
He will try to make friends and mess up in process.
I don't think though that he will be eager. It is very hard for people to come out of their shell once they have been reclusive.
A survival mechanism in this situation is to convince yourself that you are better than others and that you can do fine without them and it is hard to shake that. It will come back to him. I'd say that he will be judgmental of others rather than too forgiving.
He will have trust issues and take things personal. And rather than alientating them, he will give up on the friendship altogether because he deems it too bothersome and not worth it (that is not contradictory to wanting friends...he will feel like the universe/people have once again let him down and then drop them). He might feel awkward and weird in social situations. He will feel like everyone is part of an in-crowd an he is not.
He might find a friend/partner and then put all of his social needs in them, while forcing them to some exent to also be reclusive with him.

I think your character can learn through his experiences with other people and realize how he is behaving and what he is doing, but it is definitely a process. The points I mentioned above are definitley not things the character would be aware of. It might take his life to change.

The discussion above is good. Maybe give your brain a different way to approach the issue - go to the Experty Goodness thread under Character and Plot Realism Q&A and get ideas on what hobbies, talents, interests etc the character could have. The lists might spur or spawn ideas that develop into character traits and themes.