NaNoisms Part 3

And Mr. Murphy had a secret.

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http://swdooley.blogspot.com

NaNo 08 -- LIVVIE OWEN LIVED HERE (Feiwel and Friends, 2010)
NaNo 07 -- JOY, HOPE, AND OTHER LOST CAUSES (in revision)

Hey... Why is there a comment here?

Sorry. I don't know what happened.

The princess looked sick now – sick with worry. The Guard Master Jana just looked confused. In explanation, the Atheist Priestess said worriedly, “He blames me for my mother's murder.

Yes, we get it, Rachida, you're worried. Thank you for that totally unneeded clarification. Could you call the Department of Redundancy Department? They would like to meet with you in a meeting.

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Audrey freezed? Really? Really? She freezed?

I AM A FAILURE.

I believe Audrey FROZE.

"She took the yogurt and the white PLASTER spoon that came with it."

I also have a problem with writing the lyrics to music I'm listening to - "She almost had control over the problem of SICK MUSE."
You know what "sick muse" was supposed to be? Too bad, I shall tell you - "spontaneous combustion." Because the two are so related.

"Three mintues."
- Well, I'm not exactly sure what 'mintues' are, but there are three of them.

"...at least until it was called forth again twenty or so mintues from now."
- Clearly I don't like the word 'minutes.'

"...pen slowly making progress across each line of the pager."
- Hmm...I didn't think pagers worked that way. And since when do they have lines on them? I do believe you were writing on your PAPER, yes?

Permanent permissions. :)

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"Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart." - William Wordsworth

'She looked into his gay eyes.'

Huh. Never knew eyes could be gay. I thought his were gray. Guess you showed me, story.

Permapersimmons or whatever it is now.

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-Kate
i'm not broke but you can see the cracks
you can make me perfect again.

when i was all messed up and i heard opera in my head
your love was a lightbulb hanging over my head.

Noooo! I was doing so well until I hit this chapter and asked Write or Die to help...

DoRD, I submit my application. Though admittedly, talked should be walked.

Really? Shin guards? They're really called greaves, dear Artemis, for protecting your legs, and they are what you were mistakenly strapping on to your arms earlier... FACEPALM

face...palm. Eris, you aren't that superficial! Please tell me you kept your sister busty too!

Purrrmapersimions

Really, using the bride to cross a stream? How horrible XD
I mean BRIDGE owo;;

Here's what I just typed out:

You can tell I've done a lot of name research in this story

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I will not put The Shovel of Death in my story.

I will not put The Shovel of Death in my story.

Maybe if I say it enough, it'll come true.

"Aww, he's eating a nap,"
really? eating a nap?

I came up with this lovely bit of fourth wall breakage a few days ago:

That was on the first page. About 200 words in. I am terrified for the rest of my novel. >_<

Also: permapermissions. Or permapsniooons, as my fingers originally wanted to say.

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“Now, now, Skye, that’s just human nature. I could be bought, for the right amount of money. So could you. Everyone has a price."

I am tired and writing. Never a good thing.

He's....what?

Yes, Johnathan, why it does me perfect sense.

Because that sentence alone was not enough to perplex them.

No one does?

Oh, of course not. Don't know why I didn't think of that.

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2005 NaNo: Become So Numb
2006 NaNo: Anover
2007 NaNo: All the Common
2008 NaNo: Looking Glass
2009 NaNo: The Great Train Underground Railroad...Robbery

So in my novel, there is a blond guy with a mo-hawk. And it was important that you knew he had a mo-hawk. Unfortunately it wasn't working. My thinking went as thus:
"I threw myself at the blond"

"I threw myself at the blond mo-hawk"

...."I threw myself at the blond guy with the mohwak"?

"I threw myself at the blond mo-hawk guy"....?

"I threw myself at the blond, who happened to have a mo-hawk"

Eventually I decided on: "Without a moment's pause, I threw myself at the blond; his wo-hawk self stood no chance against my fury"

[That's right. Screw the mo-hawk. He doesn't even need it. Not when he can have a wo-hawk.]

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When everything in your novel goes to shit, just add a sassy black woman and she'll solve all your story problems.

First nanoism proper of the year, I'm so proud!

Um.
First of all, this is written in first-person past tense. Second of all, I'm not very good at describing detective hyper-awareness, am I? Third of all, WHAT.
I have no idea what that last bit could possibly mean. I suspect it was one of those cases where your mind's asleep and your fingers just keep on typing despite lack of sensical input.

(Also perma-persimmons, if any more should come up.)

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This is the song written for the train chase.
This is the chase, Rocky and Ken!
He tried to kill me with a forklift…
Olé!

In the last five minutes, I've typed "parents" as "apent," "disappointed" as "disapoointed," and "English" as "Egnlish."

Clearly I'm fluent in Egnlish.

(permapermissions...since I'm sure I'll have more in the future)

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Classes missed due to oversleeping caused by writing until late at night: 4
Poorly-written sex scenes: 2

2009--Fallen Petals--won on 11/16

That would be a slave woman, fingers.

This has got to be my most inspired sentence ever:

And that's on page nine.

A couple of pages later, she's reading the evacuation instructions for the city of New York.

Inspired. Looks like I was in a big hurry to get the juicy stuff, where I actually did know what was happening.

I love this thread! Permed Prometheus, if you like.

...no. No, Edani, sweetie, the ears did not pass without a word. Years. The years did. *facepalm*
Perma-permissimons and all that jazz.

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I'm not gullible. I'm just open minded.

Failure?! The dress looks failure? Familiar, Tristan. Familiar, brain. Familiar, keyboard. The dress looks familiar!

Way to impress the ladies with that one. >_>

"My hair does not need more body."

was just now written as "My body does not need more hair."

-head desk-

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When everything in your novel goes to shit, just add a sassy black woman and she'll solve all your story problems.

hee, I have a few, but this is my favorite one.

Nice. Doctors wear scrubs, brain. Just thought you should know.

And I'm apparently stuck on the word 'white', since I used it three times in two sentences.

Oh, yes, and perma-persimissionals all around.

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2006 - The Sandcastle (died at 20k) - Fail!
2007 - Snapshots From the Ashes (54K) - Win!
2008 - Untitled Ghost Story (50K) - Win!
2009 - (Stopped for good at 18673. Next year will be better.)

New? No one NEW? Oh dear god. *facepalm*
disppearance. disppearance?

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I'm not gullible. I'm just open minded.

Part THREE? Wow, that's a lot of NaNoisms.

Okay, I corrected this in my draft before I even typed it, but I almost put:

Wait, so now I have two Stratospheres, and while one is female, the other is somehow male?! Holy crap, no wonder I've been confused.

Also, I accidentally told the site that I had about 87 MILLION words. WHOOPS. Corrected that one ASAP.

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2006: Emryana (Success! 58000)
2007: Sayonara, Sanity! (Epic, imploding fail. 25000)
2008: Voice of the Voiceless (Hijacked, but 50000. Success?)
2009: Stratosphere White

Zoe couldn’t hold stop the tears this time, and collapsed against Trish’s shoulder, sobbing.

Somehow a cross between "hold back" and "stop". My brain obviously hasn't decided which yet. XD

Permapermish and all that.

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"You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club." - Jack London

~Brittany

Sotalia, you could easily fix your overuse of 'white' since scrubs are usually not white (green is the color I've usually seen--my wife is a MD). Unless you're thinking of the coats doctors often wear, which are not scrubs but are often white. Anyway, happy writing!

I have, at long last, received that fated call from the Department of Redundancy Department!

And better yet:

And maybe a little bizarre, or perhaps in the vein of cloning:

-
AND YET MORE.

But he has such beautiful hair!!! DDDD:

Nip those back wars in the bud, that's it! Don't let them get going! Trip them up!

Um, tigers have wings now? That's news to me, and I'm writing this universe!

P.S. Persimmons all around!

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There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein. -Red Smith

"Right now I'm learning how to nail jello to a wall. How is that NOT better than calculus?"

....*headdesk* Seriously? Really, Edani? You were lost for words until you spoke? I hadn't thought that could happen.

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I'm not gullible. I'm just open minded.

NaNo seems to have caused my ability to spell (which is usually quite good) to disappear at odd moments. I'm now quite fond of using halfhaserdly for haphazardly, unphased for unfazed, akword for awkward, and my MMC really doesn't appreciate me making him sound feminine by changing him from Jerel to Jerelle. A lot. Also, I really like the rarer typos like hunzbang for husband, screwming for screaming, gappoling for galloping, relazyed for relaxed, and AlthAt for...I have no idea.

In other news:

Amara raised an eyebrow. “Yes, I believe we must since you are a city boy with a comfortably dull existence and I’m far more complicated than you can handle. Omg this sentence sucks. I still have some places and things I must attend to.”
Attend to those things without breaking the fourth wall, plzkthx.

“Jerel Vere, I believe I told you to leave me alone,” she scooled him...
Oh yeah, he's been schooled. Or scolded, whichever works.

“You know, you could help with this, you know. You know how, don’t you?”
You know, I think you like to say you know a lot, you know? *headdesk* That was handwritten, too, and it still ended up typed without me noticing.

...in the near complete darkness of a cloudy sky because the sun er moon rose earlier but now it’s gone...
Setting fail. I'd just talked about the moon at the beginning of the paragraph. And a couple sentences later I had the MMC looking up at the stars. Clearly he can see through clouds. Mad skillz, Jerel.

From a handwritten thing that just made me stare:
“I know exactly what you mean. Such a crazy coincidence,” he said with a grin. Then everyone started talking like Dr. Seuss.
...Oh really? WHAT. The only thing I remember about writing that is a really strong urge to channel Dr. Horrible and make that 'what a crazy random happenstance', which does not equal Dr. Seuss. In any universe.