"Something About Never Letting Go..."
an excerpt

“Hi Mary.”
She froze. Rory Gilmore would know that voice anywhere...she just couldn't force her body to move, to turn, and actually see his face after all these years.
He watched her body sift through the varying emotions. First the shock, then she relaxed as she realized she recognized the voice. Her body became tense once again when fear rushed through her as she came to the realization he was there, right there in the same moment and time with her. Tristan knew without a doubt what she was feeling because they were the exact same emotions rushing through his own body.
“Mary” he whispered this time, taking a couple steps closer. Far enough away but close enough he swore to actually feel the heat radiating from her skin.
“Tr...” her voice failed her the way her body had seconds before and she tried again to utter his name after a deep breath. “Tristan” she whispered while slowly turning to face the man from her past now standing in front of her. He looked exactly the same as he had years ago at Chilton. Except for the fact of course his hair was shorter, and he had a bit of a five o'clock shadow a couple of hours too early in the day. He seemed a little taller, he was definitely more muscular and it was in that moment she realized she'd seen him before...recently. “You. It was you on the patio.”
“Huh? Patio?” He tried his best at playing dumb but he could not quite pull it off as the years went by but he still tried nonetheless.
She stepped closer and stopped just shy of too close to be able to breathe and focus completely on her words so that they would in fact make sense even if nothing else seemed to make sense to either of them in that moment. “You were at my grandparents' house a couple weeks ago. You were on their patio with that teacher and Jason and Max Medina. You were the younger man I wasn't supposed to see.”
He tilted his head and a sparkle appeared in his eyes. “You have got to be kidding me. You actually were in the woods even after Max said it could not possibly be the two of you. You and your mother were the noise I heard in the trees and you, Rory Gilmore were the blurry figure I saw rushing across the patio after Mrs. Gilmore rushed us inside.” He paused and grinned. “Rory, you were spying and not very well I might add.”
“Me? You were at my grandparents' house hiding from my mother...from me. Why were you even there?” She hoped he would tell her but she knew before he said a word he wouldn't betray the elder Gilmore's confidences.
“I can't. If your grandparents didn't tell you anything more than the fact we were there for tea that's all they want you to know for now.” He took one more step closer and reached out for her hand. Gently, he held her hand in his own and everything around them disappeared completely. He smiled. “Mary.”
She blushed and felt the heat from her cheeks course through her entire body knowing it was because of his touch. “You can't call me Mary anymore Tristan. I am not exactly innocent at my age.”
“Don't you know you'll always be Mary to me? Virgin Mary...Mary Magdalen...Mary, Mary quite contrary...whichever Mary you choose, it is going to be Mary.” Tristan was not going to budge no matter what attempts she made to try and change his mind.
She closed her eyes a moment and shook her head. “No, no more Mary. I am Rory.” She stated as she opened her eyes and found him staring into them making her knees weak, not to mention stealing her breath away.
“I missed you Rory” Tristan stated simply, however Rory felt more from that one simple and to the point statement than in anything her ex-fiance ever said, not to mention any other man in her life. He could see by the look on her face that he should not have said something like that so soon. “Sorry, you haven't had a very good month and that just isn't something you need to hear.”
“How do you know I haven't?” Rory questioned him, although knowing herself what the answer must be.
“Your Grandfather. Uh, we've spoken over the years.” He waited making sure he was certain he wanted to tell her. “And when I was at their house, that night you turned into Encyclopedia Brown, your grandfather and I had a conversation about you and it may have been mentioned that you had a tough month with everything. We only speak every once in a while because he knew my grandfather so well and it isn't like we talk every day or even every week for that matter.” Tristan realized he was rambling and decided to stop before he said something he would regret.
“Oh god. That is just fantastic.” She let out a heavy sigh.
“Trust me, the way my life has been since we met at Chilton, you have nothing to worry about at all. Anything your grandfather may have told me weeks ago is child's play compared to my screw-ups in life.” Tristan continued to hold her hand. He did not want to let her go again and he didn't want to tempt fate in any way knowing fate, kismet, destiny, or whatever word people used these days was in fact what brought her to him.
Rory chuckled. “The more recent stuff is probably me at my absolute worst. I had it all...and it all came crashing down around me.”
“Can I ask you a question and will you answer me honestly?”
“Of course” she answered with no hesitation at all.
Tristan smiled at her and she had forgotten just how easily she could get completely lost in that grin...those dimples...the jawline. “Okay.” He thought a moment in an attempt to prepare his words carefully, not knowing why he was about to be so bold and ask the question he knew came out of nowhere and probably not the sort of question a man that hadn't seen the particular woman in fifteen years or more should ever dream of asking right off the bat. “Were you happier before with him and whatever issues the two of you had that caused you to end the relationship or are you more content right now in your life alone and free no matter the uncertainties that lie ahead for you?”
Rory contemplated the question and came to a realization she didn't even know if Tristan had made. “You could have worded that question in a much simpler way you know.”
“How's that?” He suddenly seemed nervous.
“Him or you?” She said bluntly.
Laughing he spoke, “I guess that is in fact one way you could put it if you so choose. Although what makes you think I would be available for that question to be an appropriate question? I could be married with kids and just wondering if you are okay and have done well for yourself over the years since we last saw one another.” He tilted his head just a little and waited for her response.
She looked down at their hands and grinned. Gazing back a the man standing directly in front of her and still holding her hand in his she simply answered “Tristan Dugrey, you are still holding my hand and there is no ring on your finger. Well, no ring on your left ring finger anyway. If you were married, I think you would be the type of man that would wear his ring proudly and also if you were married, I would hope you would not be standing here with me, this close, and holding my hand the way you are. Correct?”
“Probably” he answered reluctantly.
She shook her head. “You are unbelievable.”
“And you Mary are avoiding answering my question at all cost aren't you?”
“Avoiding at all cost? Really Tristan, so dramatic.” Rory was in fact avoiding the question because she truly had no idea how she might answer. Yes she was certain she should be happier now that she is in fact free but she wasn't sure she was ready to take a leap and say she could end up happy with a man she hadn't seen in years and can't remember being all that fond of him when they met knowing that was part of his question.
“You are going through our history in your mind right now aren't you?”
“What?”
“You are. I know you are. I can see it in your eyes.” All she could see were his beautiful blue eyes dancing and laughing at her expense.
“How do you possibly know what my eyes can say to you or to anyone else?”
Again with the grin. “See, I was right.”
“You are still as frustrating as you ever were.” She did not want to budge.
“Answer my question Mary.” He held on to a dramatic pause. “Please?” he added with the puppy dog eyes.
“What question did you ask me Tristan?” It was Rory's turn to attempt playing dumb and it did not work any better for her than it did for Tristan.
Tristan laughed. “You don't want to answer. Lets see, why would Mary not want to answer my question.” Cocking his head to the right, he squinted his eyes halfway shut and mumbled 'hmmm' before letting out an “ah hah!”
“I'm waiting. Seems you have me all figured out so shoot. Go ahead, let me have it. Tell me all about Rory Gilmore and why she does the things she does” Rory dared.
“You are still afraid to fall for me Rory Gilmore. No I am not married, almost took the plunge but it simply did not work out and she dumped me. There is nothing holding me back from dating you Mary. You know, it seems as though I said that once before to you, many years ago and you turned me down then as well. Yes, that seems to be a theme with you and I don't think I like that part of you. I like the optimistic hopeful Mary.” He smiled and finally let go of her hand. “Would you care to sit down? We've been standing a while and although I can handle it, I wonder if you might like a rest.”
Her hand was cold and she did not like that one tiny bit. There was also absolutely no way she would dare to ask him to hold her hand again much less grab his hand to hold. “Sure, we can sit down.” She looked around and asked him, “uh, where do we do this sitting down thing?”
He chuckled, placed his hand on the small of her back, and led her around the corner to a row of benches facing out toward the ocean. “Here is where we do this sitting down thing.” He held out his arm, pointing to the bench and allowing her to sit down first.
The two sat on a bench and looked out at the ocean. Neither spoke, afraid they would break the comfortable silence they shared. Finally Rory softly spoke. “Oh my goodness this view is absolutely beautiful Tristan.”
“Yes it is” he replied although he was not looking at the view of the ocean. He could not stop looking at the woman sitting beside him. He was finally sitting down with her again on a bench and he felt transported back to Chilton, wishing he could take so much back that he said and then wishing he had the courage to say so much more. She thought he should be with Paris and all he could think about was how she kept describing herself when she was trying to convince him to date another type of girl. It was never Paris he wanted to date. It had always been Rory. She glanced over at him and saw him sitting beside her staring directly at her and ignoring the beautiful scene in front of them. She laughed and he swore he saw her eyes twinkle when she did. “What's so funny Mary?”
“I do really wish you would stop calling me Mary. Aren't we old enough to use our actual names?”
“We? Oh, so you had a nickname for me as well?” He was now rather curious.
“Well, no, not technically I suppose. Jerk, Ass, or even Idiot sometimes...things like that I would use in reference to you back then but I don't think there was an actual name such as Mary. Although whenever Dean brought you up in conversation I don't think I used your name. Maybe just 'him' or that guy. He did call you Dristan...wasn't sure if you had remembered that or not” she added with a wicked grin and this time he was positive her eyes were twinkling.
“Yes Mary, I remember the Dristan comment. He was brilliant that one.” Tristan shook his head. “I never really understood what you saw in him back then Rory. I figured he just must have been really nice to you because so many times I was not very nice.” He took her hand in his once again and stroked the back of it with his other hand. Her hand was so soft and he had to stop his mind from wandering to places to soon to go. It was not time for any of that and he wanted to play it smart this time now that she was back in his life. There were so many things he had to tell her and he simply needed to find the right time to do it. But he knew for certain now was not the right time at all. She had been on his mind off and on over the years but she was not ready to hear any of that
Rory felt the goosebumps pop up on her arms as he stroked her hand in his own. She had always liked his hands but now she caught herself wondering what those hands might feel like on her skin...skin other than that belonging to her hand. She wanted to shake her head to help her lose the thoughts floating around in her mind but Rory was certain Tristan would ask what she was doing and she knew she had no answer other than the truth to give to him and that simply was not an option. She instead closed her eyes and willed the thoughts away into some tiny box she would open up later when he wouldn't pick on her about having them like she was certain he would do.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure you're okay?”
“Yes, I am positive” she replied while opening her eyes and gazing right into his beautiful blue eyes with the tiny flecks of brown in them that she had never noticed before.
“What?”
“Huh?”
Tristan laughed. “You are sitting there staring at me. Something wrong? Chocolate on my face?”
“Oh, no, I just noticed something I never had before.”
“Uh oh, what's that Mary?”
“Again with the Mary.” She shook her head. “I thought your eyes were just blue but they have flecks of brown around the pupils.”
“Yes.” His brows furrowed and he focused on the woman sitting next to him. “Your eyes are just blue.”
“I know.”
“Yep. The same beautiful blue I remember.”
She blushed.
“There she is. There's that shy Mary I remember.”
“Stop. I was never really shy...I talked all the time.”
“No, you didn't. Not really anyway. Not to me at first. And when you did talk to me you would argue with me more than anything. Well, until...” he knew he didn't need to finish the last statement. Tristan knew with the utmost confidence that Rory understood exactly what he meant.