Excerpt:

Reality is overrated. That's why the critics hate us, we're too real. Except for old man Montague over there. He's holographic. See? You can pass your hand right – ha! Gotcha! Compliments of the critics on that one. He's believably fake, apparent enough that you don't. Have a seat, have a seat. Right here is fine, but if you need a chair, there's a few over there next to the curtain. Just be careful, Ophelia is changing into her rusalka costume, you might get wet.