Excerpt: Blind Devotion

“Well this girl Lucy is kind of a bitch. For some reason she gets the greatest joy of out telling this kid Charlie Brown to come kick the football while she holds it. I can’t even understand why he’d want to do something like that in the first place, I guess it’s a kid thing. Anyway, he goes to kick it, she pulls it away and he falls in what sounds like a pretty dramatic way. But the thing is, he knew she was going to pull it away and yet she convinces him that she won’t so I think she’s done this before. Really it’s his fault by this point and why on earth would he fall in the first place? Wouldn’t he just kick air? Does his foot have to meet resistance to keep the rest of his body from taking flight? It makes no sense!”

Toki had never before heard someone dissect Charlie Brown, and he was equal parts amused and fascinated by it. “Well, I guess if he was expecting a ball to be there it could catch him off guard. Or maybe he just has poor coordination.”

“Poor planning is more like it. You know, if he had doubts that she’d actually hold the ball there he should have at least planned for it. It’s not like he was completely caught off guard, he was expecting it! What is wrong with this kid?”

“I think he has self esteem issues. I mean he’s practically bald and he’s like… eight years old. I imagine once he hits high school he’s never going to get a date. Or if he does it’ll probably be from that girl in class that no one else wants to date.”

“That’s assuming he doesn’t develop a better personality before high school. He could you know, especially since that seems to be his problem now. I mean nobody respects this kid, it’s really kind of tragic.”

Toki bit his lip to stop himself from laughing. Who got this passionate about Charlie Brown? “Well you know there’s always the possibility that by the time he’s in high school he’d be so far gone that he’d be the type to decide to steal one of his Grandpa’s guns and go on a shooting spree. These things do happen.”

“No, I don’t think so.” Edsel shook his head and looked thoughtful. “No, he’s not the type of kid. I know they say it’s always the ones you least expect, but he’s too hopelessly optimistic. I kind of like him even though you just know he’s destined to fail. He doesn’t seem miserable even though he probably should, you know?”

“It’s an admirable trait.”

“In a way. Though you could also look at it as incredible stupidity. “

“You’ve missed most of the show you know.” Finally Toki let himself laugh, though only a quiet chuckle. Edsel actually looked a little disappointed to realize that the show was almost over. “Have you really never seen it before?”

“No, I was never big on holiday shows. I liked it though, or what I saw of it. Why is it that people enjoy watching a show that is based around some eight year old’s pathetically sad life?”

“I have no idea, but don’t worry there are more of them. The Christmas special is a holiday classic and I think you’ll like that one better anyway.”

“Oh?” Edsel turned to face Toki, giving him a curious expression. “Why’s that?”

“Well if I told you then it’d give away the whole thing silly. You’ll just have to wait till next month. If you’ve never watched holiday specials before you are in for some sensory overload my friend. December is all about Christmas in this country.”