Excerpt:

Chapter 4 – The Gods in those First Moments

When the Hecathoncheires and Anemoi carefully let mankind down from the winds and dropped each individual in a separate strand, they returned to the heavens for a respite. The world now came under the watchful gaze of Shag who, for the next 18 years would have reign over the earth to do as he pleased.

What a conflict you had in the heavens! The gods had agreed to Shag’s reign, and he had agreed to certain conditions. For one, he would not kill anyone. If they died, being uncared for, as the infant had done in that first day, fine. However, Shag could not perform any act of destruction, as the God of Abraham did in destroying the whole earth with a flood, burning Soddom and Gomorrah, or any of his other violent acts toward mankind. A creator’s violence toward his own creation had not provided any purity or cleansing. It provided death. That’s it. For another, the gods agreed that mankind would be without elements of entertainment; not even a pen for scribbling would be provided them. In turn, Shag would put together an army of cleaning agents that would keep the strands sanitary. Each week these small insects would take over a strand for a matter of five minutes, a black out, where they moved in through microscopic holes, cleaned and disinfected everything and flowed back out. Shag would also provide food for these people. That food got delivered through a sealed hole in the ground. Each day three meals were delivered. And by each stove he had put a trash repository. If someone did not eat a meal, it was removed from the refrigerator at the beginning of each day. If man tried to keep it in his strand, outside the refrigerator, the cleaning agents would ingest the remains on their weekly visit.

In providing cleanliness and sustenance Shag met the minimal requirements that these gods had set down. And he in turn got to really stick in to the man by depriving them of any means of entertaining themselves, moving toward or touching each other or communicating.

In his beginnings as a god, Shag walked the earth a nameless and unrecognizable force, an astonishing observer of the ways of man and a champion of the idea that some day he could be made pure. So many attempts had been made to cleanse the souls of mankind of their vile nature, or their tendency to move toward and hurt each other, of their uncanny ability to misunderstand each other, and in misunderstanding take offense, and in taking offense, to react in a violent and unreasonable manner. He noticed how much the environment impacted a person’s livelihood. A child who grew up with an M-16 in his hands gave as much to violence as a child in a more developed part of the world might have given himself to piano, or something of beauty. He saw the dreams of people die in offices where small minded managers and short sighted directors took advantage of those who had more promise than themselves. And these dreams were crushed not only by people, but by systems developed by these people. The gods had conversation after conversation about how man had not been created for this type of environment. Shag could see this for himself in the broken hearts, worn out spirits, confused and beleaguered minds. Where he found resilience, kindness, warmth, compassion, love, full-hearted patience and charisma, he found the support and vibrancy of others. Even in these places, the best intentions went unnoticed, underappreciated, or could even be misread. And in these places, the best of intentions also got misinterpreted. Every now and then people would acknowledge each other and express love, but on a genuine scale, things did not look bright.

As he walked around the earth, getting to know mankind, he realized that if the spirit were to be cleansed, if the heart were to be made pure, something had to happen with the way things were. For ages the gods spent time focusing on mankind, bringing him messages, asking him to sacrifice his own desires, asking him to look toward heaven and not earth, where he lived. These gods sought the most outrageous commitments from people and yet left them just where they were with no more strength or capacity than what they had before. Some gods told man they lived inside him, would give him strength, help him resist temptation. Other gods scared the shit out of people, bringing all sorts of curses for this and that, warning man that getting out of line meant you were fucked, sometimes for good. These gods used everything from diplomacy to scare tactics, from promises of something wonderful beyond something cursed, and of transcendence. Shag thought wondered to himself how men had come to believe these messages. If the gods didn’t get it right the first time, if somehow they miscalculated what life would be like, why would they trust them with their souls after life!

Shag walked the earth for a number of years, going back and forth, listening silently and secretly to the thoughts of others. He observed wars, business operations, families, lovers, dictators, artists, manufacturing plants…he sat in on board meetings and watched men sleep with women other than their wives, he heard the whispers and lies of mankind to each other while they moved about trying to get what they wanted. He witnessed the ups and downs of human emotion, how fragile the heart and mind of people were. He stood by as men killed other men, mothers killed their children, strangers killed strangers. He put his finger on the pulse of neglected children, pondered the hatred in the hearts of bullies, the arrogance of men of repute, the deceitfulness of a woman who wants more than anything to be seen and admired. Not an hour would pass when he did not find himself totally confounded by the human race. The range of emotions and actions that passed every day utterly amazed him. No wonder the gods didn’t want to get involved on any deep level. It would be impossible. And you couldn’t promise anything – not safety, not long life, not even happiness. Too much lay in the hearts and minds of a person. Not even the god of Abraham could keep Jesus from the killers. And how they hated that man! For what? For a claim he made that contradicted a set of beliefs they held to be true!! Beliefs they grew up with and had not known anything different from.

His observations did enough to depress him. Where harrowing acts of courage and hope broke the norm, there were a hundred acts of hatred and foolishness. Now, if you got into the hearts and minds of these people, if you observed them inwardly and not just outwardly, then you had a true revelation. Shag began to follow certain people, began to listen to them when they spoke to themselves under their breath, got into their minds when they were dreaming, got into their eyes to see things the way they did, got into their marrow to feel the blows the way they felt them. Anyone who’d talked to Jesus in the heavens, any of the gods he held counsel with could have told you that this was a bad idea. Jesus probably grieved more than any of the gods had, more than even Vishnu who had reportedly incarnated himself nine times! As the story went, Jesus suffered at the hands of men. A god taking a beating from his own creation, can you believe that shit? You didn’t have a story like this anywhere in history.

What he got from his time on earth turned out to be two things. First, he saw man’s problem as not being an internal, but an external one. The insides got influenced by the outside. You might have a beautiful being in birth, but when that little piggy goes to market, watch out! From young people took on feelings and behaviors they couldn’t understand and before you knew it they had habits, and before they knew it, their habits were affecting others! The gods be damned for their shortsighted fooling about with man’s spirit. And how any of them planned to cleanse this sickly element before they let them into paradise blew Shag’s mind. Just ‘cause a man’s body is gone, doesn’t necessarily mean he gonna be clean. The second thing he realized in his observations, mankind does not believe in god.

So, when he went about devising his purification scheme, he took these two notes to the drawing board with him. You gotta remove external influence. And you gotta remove god. That’s how you cleanse a human being. Over the next several years, through countless deliberations with other gods, he set about devising this carpet scheme. Solitary confinement. It was perfect. You get a man outside of himself, with nothing but himself to deal with, you got a winner. Can’t nobody change his mind once he’s made it up. In all that loneliness, in those acute moments where they realize what they had and what they’ve lost, in the moments where they can’t understand why and realize they never will, realize that not even god himself is around to provide the answers, when they understand their own limitations and how vast creation really is or had been for them, that’s when you’re gonna hear a man really cry out for god, really confess his inadequacy. Not only this, he’s gonna search for himself in that silence and in that misery. He’s gonna wake up day after day and think about his life, a constant re-run. He’s gonna wonder about what he could have done differently, gonna think about the people he should ask forgiveness of if this confinement ever lets up, gonna think about how his life should change. And you know what, he’s gonna change too. No doubt. At least, this is how Shag reasoned.

Chapter 5 – Somewhere Else in the World

In Brazil, or where Brazil had been prior to the razing of the earth, a young man name Mohammad awoke in his strand, stunned. The first sound from his lips – Allah! And he saw something he’d never seen before, a naked woman. Right before him, also just waking up from sleep a beautiful Dominican woman, body like fucking Adriana Lima. This poor bastard just sat in bed slack-jawed. He didn’t even realize the nature of his surroundings, didn’t think about listening to any call for prayer, couldn’t feel the hunger pangs eating at his innards. Talk about amazing. And when she realized him looking at her, she tried to cover herself. No luck. The linen wrapped around the mattress completely. No getting that off. And there were no sheets. So, she curled up in the fetal position with her back turned to him, sending shame shooting right up his spine, changing the color of his face.

Here you had a young man, probably early twenties, who’d never lived a day without some rule being imposed on him. I mean, when you have to pray five times a day to be holy, that’s something. And when you can’t look at women, can’t forget to include the will of Allah in any future plans – Insha’Allah. Did god will this? Did he place a young Mohammad in probably the worst position he could have? Could this be a test from god meant to clearly understand his fitness for heaven? Or, had he died? And was this heaven? Mohammad could not be sure, but you bet your ass it took him a while to calm down and actually realize what happened.

Slowly coming to, he looked around and, wouldn’t you know it, there were other naked women around him! And they were beautiful too! He had died and gone to heaven!! Eight strands surrounding him housed all beautiful women, with exception of the late 40’s white man with a graying beard, short stylish hair and slender, muscular physique. Yet, even he was handsome! Mohammad marveled at the beauty of all this nakedness, immediately wondered what privilege he’d received and began to take on the mindset that, hey, he’d gotten into heaven.

Now imagine with me where this kid came from. Growing up in what you could call the middle class of Riyadh, he hadn’t exactly come to appreciate the beauty of a human body, at least not any but his own. Women were completely covered and separated from him most times, with exception of family. When he went to restaurants, the men were separated from the women. When he finally got his own apartment, the single women and families lived in one building, the single men lived in another. He grew up going to an all male school. So, what he knew of the female body he got from little trips he’d take to Dubai with his dad once he came of age. And those had opened his eyes to an entirely different world. But this, this was incredible! The women couldn’t cover themselves up if they wanted to! Of course, and we’ll get to this later in the story, some women from Riyadh and from those other god-fearing parts of the earth where a woman’s body was venerated almost collapsed and died from shame when they realized their conditions, especially with men staring at them!! If there were time, you can only imagine the scenarios…

So, Mohammad sat on his bed, taking it all in. His shame had receded for the moment as the woman he’d been looking at seemed to be asleep. However, he himself felt quite uncomfortable now because the middle-aged man seemed to be staring at him. What could he possibly want? When he saw the man approaching the glass, lightly tapping on it with his finger, he looked down. And what did he see? The man had an erection. Soon the man began stroking this erection and before Mohammad knew it, the man was lying on the floor, worked up and breathing hard, muscles of his stomach contracting, and before Mohammad could look away the man came. How was this? With all these women around and this guy is beating off to a just come of age a few years ago man? Mohammad did not know this, but he’d been in the strand of carpet now about three days. He slept through the first two. The man across from him, a sordid self-proclaimed atheist didn’t think twice about this confinement. He’d spent most of his life on his own because of his peculiar habits that didn’t find acceptance in the country he grew up in. And familiar with sci-fi and surreal type novels and stories, and actually believing them, he kind of reveled in his new found situation. For Mohammad, a naked woman had been a dream come true. For the gentlemen who just relieved himself, constant access to a beautiful naked young man, without fear of retribution or judgment, that had been his dream.

Remember now that Shag could see all of this. And as much as the scene above disgusted him, he also sincerely believed atrocities like this one, and like the baby who died would wash out and that mankind would come around to some sense. He felt the old man would tire of this fantasy, that a young man like Mohammad would realize that these beautiful women were more than bodies, and he would be able to tell by never having the access to touch them. So, Mohammad sat on his bed those first hours, enthralled by nakedness, appalled at this mans fascination with him and not even aware that his condition at the moment might last forever. He stared at the beautiful women for what seemed like days. And while the woman across from him slept, he noticed many of the other women mourning began to take in his surroundings and realized he was in some serious shit. What was worse? You couldn’t comfort anyone, couldn’t tell what their problems were, and couldn’t hear what they were thinking about. All you could do was see.

Mohammad walked down to the first floor and opened the refrigerator door. He finally came around to realizing his hunger and thanked Allah for the food before him. Taking out a package labeled lunch he then began to curse god. Where he’d wanted falafel and flat bread, he’d gotten a tuna sandwich with chips and an apple. Now Shag would change it up, but even bringing people out of their element in this way would teach them a lesson. We’ll leave it at that for the moment. As Mohammad proceeded to eat these things, he, like all others in the world at this point, began to notice what he did not have. What time was it? Not a clue, unless you correlated the green light, which he just not noticed, with the sun. Where had his family been taken? How long would this last? Who were the women around him? They certainly weren’t from the Middle East. And if Allah had a hand in this, what could he remember from his Qur’an recitations that would provide guidance? If Allah did not have a hand in it, then who? And what in the hell were the two contraptions on the first floor? One looked like a broad old-person’s walked with a big rubber band for a base. The other was just a steel tub with streaming water running in it. Not everyone in the world exercises, right? You could have written a comedy just about all the people unfamiliar with these apparatus trying to use them! Some people drown, other people broke ankles. Some out of sheer boredom triumphed over this exercise equipment and found they quite liked it. This happened only out of sheer boredom though.

Granted, Mohammad did not know a lot at the moment. With his stomach filled to satisfaction with tuna and potato and apple, he looked around for something to do. Nothing. So, he took a seat and began to watch the others around him, a practice it seemed they themselves had taken up. He noticed the middle-aged man showering, noticed that sleeping beauty still had her back turned to him, acknowledged with a nod one of the women looking at him and turned his attention to the exercise apparatus.

Chapter 6 – Somewhere Else in the World

Not even Shag could have anticipated the outpouring of human emotion that would accompany the first hours and days of this cleansing he was after. After the first few curiosity-laden days had past, the world began to wake up. There was no end in sight. People began to miss their loved ones and family. They began to get angry. And guess who they got angry with? You guessed it. God. Even those who claimed to be atheist started cursing the gods – you think you’ve heard somebody take Jesus’ name in vein before? You haven’t heard nothin’. Motherfucker! rang out like a bell all over the world, or variations of it. Whatever you put behind the emotion of that expression, in whatever language, that’s what you could hear a chorus of from almost everyone. Shag thought hey, unity! Who would have thought you could bring the world together so easily! All you had to do was separate them from each other. This got his wheels turning, but we’re not talking about him right now.

Let’s go to one more somewhere else in the world before we move on.

Now, what is gonna be described here was an accident. Some might say fate, but fate usually has to do with some expected or inevitable. What you’re going to hear now was neither of those. You had, within five strands of each other, in a small part of Scotland, a family. Grandma, mom, dad, baby sister and a cousin all within looking distance, all naked and all completely confounded. You wanna talk about perverted, talk about the internal happiness of this father when he finally got to see his blossoming daughter without clothes on! And talk about craziness? Talk about how this cousin, this young man got turned on by his aunt! No one could have foretold what open nakedness would do for the world, but it certainly turned on a lot of lights upstairs, and nine times out of ten those weren’t very bright. At least it’s not something you’d talk about today with pride anyhow.

But here’s this family. When they’re waking up to each other you have immediate clamoring. Mom’s trying to climb the inside walls of her strand of carpet, trying to dig out the floor, trying to battering-ram style throw herself against the walls, anything to get at her family, and all for nothing. She would come to find that out later. Take paternal love and a father’s attempt to protect and rescue his daughter. Take his being helpless when other men are ogling her because she’s full on naked and you can’t do anything about it. Take it that these men don’t even know, wouldn’t even think that it was your daughter, think their sharing the same fantasy you are! You had your all white, pure bread American family all trapped together in this space. Take the daughter’s and the cousin’s general innocence in life, both under the age of 16, both still very curious and impressionable, both still very hopeful and both still completely dependent on others for how they think not only of themselves but of everything else.