Excerpt: Broken Silence

“Get out of my life!”

As Kate bellowed into her phone, I curled up in a ball on my bed. Obviously, she was going to be awhile.

“I am so serious—you are pathetic. No. Absolutely not. I can’t believe you would say that to me!”

I sighed. Kate’s one-sided conversations often went like this. At least this time her victim was her on-again-off-again boyfriend, Brian. He deserved this chewing out.

Her voice bounced off my empty walls while I fingered the fringes on my bedspread.

Ten minutes later Kate snapped her phone shut. “I’m going out with Brian.” I raised my eyebrow at her announcement.

“Really.”

Kate was used to my “speak no more words than necessary” policy. “Yes, really. It’s not his fault.”

“Whatever.”

“Really, Brigitta, you could sound at least a little excited for me. Brian and I are back together!”

I watched her for a minute, then offered a small smile. “Have fun.”

Kate grinned and started toward the door. “Thanks, Bri, I’ll call you tomorrow!”

I rested my head on my pillow. Tiny tears leaked from my eyes.

It’s not fair. She always spends more time with dippy Brian than with me, her best friend!

As my fist pounded into my mattress a howl escaped. “What is so wrong with me?”

Five minutes of tossing and turning didn’t ease my thoughts.

Everyone leaves me. I’m worthless. No one really cares.

By the time these thoughts flooded my mind, I was crying uncontrollably.

“I…” hiccup, “hate…” hiccup, “my life!”

I felt my heart pounding and knew what was coming. There was only one way to ward off a panic attack.

I slid off the bed and stumbled to my dresser. Pulling open the bottom drawer, I slid my hand under my photo album and grasped the razor blade.

Immediately, I felt my breath loosen. Gripping the piece of silver I rolled up my sleeve and systematically dug the blade into my skin. It burned, then bled, and I knew everything would be okay. Well, that is--if I didn’t die first.