Excerpt: Don't Know Yet

Chapter 1:

That dream, was enough to make me resent the thought of suicide. Knowing how much pain it would cause the people around me. Leaving the world forever. My mother. Arron. Arron [the dog]. Cherri. Fiona. Felix. I could not, would not do that to them. Ever. I made a vow to myself that moment, that I would completely turn my life around. That I would never attempt to kill myself. I promised the world, that I would not cut my self ever again. I would never have to get stitches. Never have to switch hospitals. Go home and clean my knife of my own blood. Never again would I have to do horrid these things. I would clean out my life. I was going to start over.

Chapter 2:

He drank some of his coffee to, then put down the mug and looked at me. He just stared for a moment. I did not mind. I took the oppritunity to look into his amazing brown eyes. He seemed to be looking into my black ones, and it seemed as though we were sharing a very intimate moment. I felt as though he actually liked me. As hard as it was I tore myself away from his eyes. He seemed to notice the change.
“So Charlotte,” he said.
“Arron,” I replied dumbly.

Chapter 3:

The third week of November was probably the saddest week of November for me. That was the week I found out.
Since I started cutting my self, my mother decided it was best to go in for monthly check ups. Both of us. So as we went in for our monthly check up. I thought nothing of it. Just another borhing hour at the doctors office. I went into one room with my doctor, and my mother went into another room with her doctor.
When we come out of our rooms and meet again usually we smile and talk about how boring that was, and why do we always do that. Then I tell her and we decide to go get some ice cream. Well this month it was different. When I walked out of the doctors office, I was smiling. Totally happy and bored as usual, now. But then I saw my mother sitting in a chair, leaning over with her head in her hands. She looked as if she was crying. I walked up to her and asked her what was wrong. She somberly told me she had some bad news.
The doctor had told her she had cancer. It was somewhere around her leg now. They did not know how long it would take the cancer to get up to her lungs or heat, which ever it went to first. So they were running tests right now. The longest she would have was 10 years they said.