Excerpt: The Tale

After arriving in Gale's Town, the three current heroes need horses. . . .

At the end of the road was a large horse paddock and stable. A sign overhead declared “Honest Joe Statler – Horses Bought, Sold, and Traded.” The trio watched the scene for a moment. Inside the paddock were a few men exercising some horses, while another man in a top hat and a rather dusty (and rather garish) red suit looked on. “Easy with that mare, boys!” the suited man called. “We mustn’t overstress the poor creature! Otherwise we won’t get a good price!”

“Guess he’s the guy we want to talk to,” Marty said, and headed for the entrance to the paddock. “Uh, excuse me! Hi! We need some horses?”

The suited man promptly spun around. “Customers!” He dashed up to Marty, plastering a large grin across his face. “Well now, son, you’ve come to the best darn horse dealer in all of the kingdom. Name’s Statler, Joe Statler, Honest Joe Statler.” He grabbed Marty’s hand and pumped it up and down. “What can I do you for, boy?”

“We need three horses,” Marty said, pulling his hand free and shaking it – Statler had squeezed his fingers a little too tight. “Three strong, fast horses. The best you’ve got.”

“Oh, that’s easy! We’ll fix you right up! Tony! Bring that mare over here!” Statler beamed at Marty as Tony brought over a young, chestnut-colored horse. “Now, this here mare is the sweetest-tempered young thing to ever be known as a horse.” The mare whinnied and shook her head. “Quiet rider, goes for long distances, previously owned by a little old lady who only rode her to and from church every Sunday.”

Marty eyed the horse. “Riiight. . . .”

The mare suddenly reared, kicking the air with her front hooves. Tony struggled to bring her down. “Here now, calm down, you fool beast!”

Statler’s smile didn’t even waver. “She’s just excited to know you,” he said to Marty. “And I can let you have her for the low low price of – say – ten silver coins?”

“Uh, I don’t know if I have any silver. . . .”

“That’s two hundred copper, if that’s all you have.”

“Actually--”

“Or here! You could have that lovely roan gelding over there!” Statler said, grabbing Marty’s arm and steering him toward another horse. “Quiet as a church mouse, could jump a decent-sized river, and owned by an old man who only took him out to mow the lawn.”

“Mow the lawn?”

“Well, yes, horses need to eat, you know. Only seven silver – that’s one hundred forty copper.”

“Yeah, but the thing is--”

“I know what you need!” Statler cut him off again. “You need a nice, big--”

He abruptly cut off, staring over the fence. Marty followed his line of site to see he was staring at Alice, who was leaning on the top post, watching the proceedings with interest. Victor was next to her, frowning as he looked at the horses, then at his own long legs. “That’s Red Riding Hood,” Statler mumbled, his smile finally fading. “What’s she doing here?”

“Oh, she’s with me,” Marty said.

Statler turned to stare at him. “What?”

“Yeah, we’re traveling together. Me, her, and Victor there. That’s why we need the horses.”

“You’re honestly traveling with her?”

“Yeah? So?”

Statler turned back to look at Alice. She smiled at him, looking just a touch too friendly. “Did I say seven silver before?” he blurted, quickly facing Marty again with an embarrassed grin. “I meant one, nobody pays more than two or three for a horse, and that roan’s seen better days.”