Adopt-a-Line

Awesome! Good idea for a thread.

Lines:

"You are too," he said, walking down the cold sand.
"Am what?" she asked, rubbing her arms.
"Beautiful. Like the Mona Lisa. Perfect, you know? Just lovely."

"Hey! He looks like that guy from 'Early Edition'!"

That night was strange and mucus-filled.

Lines:

And then, just as she reached out for my hand, I burped and killed the moment.

"We are the ones who keep doing exactly what we're supposed to be doing, living life in a circle. We are the ones who paint the roses red."

When the blood dried, it looked like paint that stained to carpet with the most alluringly deep crimson color.

I'd really love to be able to use both of these, but right now I can't foresee any scene in my NaNo where they would be plausible:

"I am extremely wary of anyone with religious statuary on their front lawn."

"I know violence isn't the answer. I got it wrong on purpose."

This could be dangerous as well as fun.

"No. Just the tea."

"You know, 'Frosty the Snowman' might be a serial killer. He goes on an 'icicle spree' and runs into town with a broomstick in his hand."
"Merry Christmas to you too."

"How did it go?"
"Horrible. I felt like a kid who didn't do her homework."
"You went to make a hair appointment, right?"
"Yeah."

"God! That's disgusting! Taste it!"

"It was a horrible case of game rage."
"But you were playing Monopoly!"
"You weren't there."

"Not just screwed. Hyper-spherically screwed."

Most of those are from real life. Four were inspired by today's happenings.

"If you ever hold a knife like that to me again, I´ll kill you. No matter how much i love you."

"If it hadn't been for the midget, Brian just might have escaped.'

" 'Well, I work as the guy who makes up those vaguely Zen-sounding mottoes in fortune cookies.' "

"I know violence isn't the answer. I got it wrong on purpose."

I'm taking this line if you don't mind.

And to add to the pool myself

"Has the world gone mad?"
"Short answer: yes"

"and here I thought I was the only one who worked this late"

"I know I can't save everyone, so why do I feel like I must?"

"It's either my way or the highway."
"Woohoo! Road trip!"

Discarded from a first draft -- the genre is anthrofiction. Woman speaking to her fiancé.

“How do you know so much about her? Are you going to run off with her and live in the woods? Maybe the four of you can live in a cave together. You and your crazy sister can live like animals with your half-human, chicken-stealing lovers and wear sticks in your hair.”

Gawd I loved that line, but it (and other things) made the character seem a little too bipolar. Out it went!

Scotty

Oh, that line is wonderful! Made me laugh out loud =)

I'm not sure if I can use it, but I'm going to do my best to work it in.

I like the second one! Might adopt it

Might adopt the frosty one too! That's great!

"Yeah? Well you don't have an invisible avatar of death sitting on your desk singing the numa numa song in your ear!"

Taking many, and leaving you this!

Annoyed, she slammed her door and immediately plunged her hand into the ‘Fuck It’ Bucket. With a slight smirk, she re-read the sign—‘When life gives you shit, just say ‘Fuck it!’ and have yourself some candy!’—and muttered “Fuck it!” through a mouthful of fun-sized 3 Musketeers bars. She was running low on candy again; she’d have to get some more soon. Either life was on laxatives, or her sweet tooth was extending its roots to her brain, but she seemed to be eating from the ‘Fuck It’ Bucket at least twice a day.
She sighed as she pulled a Tootsie Pop out of the bucket. Maybe it was a combination of the two.

" I was no good at angst, so I contented myself with stress, overwork, and an early death. Yep, that was a superb substitute for angst. "

" Across me, a young mother nursed her child. "

It was supposed to be "across from me..." but I think this is much more amusing. XD

He would have liked to answer her, but it is widely known that in order to respond, you must first listen.

The woman stared at me like I was the answer to all of life's problems. I smiled, got down on my knees and began to fix the plumbing.

"What's up with her?"
"Dragons."

I have a huge collection of these. None of them are mine, and all are properly attributed. (I also can't find the thread I ganked these from originally, so if anyone can help there?)

"There is no way that should have worked" (Twilight Muse)

"Unfortunately, I didn't even have 'It seemed like a good idea at the time' as an excuse this time around."

"So tell me, just how did you manage to make it snow in biology class?"

"I bet I can vapourise this pencil using only a shot of vodka and some kitchen roll." (Dragon-Mage)

"It was a cold and rainy day when I died the first time" (SilverCluto)

"What you are about to read really happened; I did not just rip this off from some anime." (5thWall)

- Most boys wanted to grow up gay. I was different.
- He was drowning in a sea of science.
- If these are the best years of my life, just kill me now. (D L Dzioba)

- "It's not like he felt it; he was already dead."
- "Have you been dead long?" (gloomyglee)

"Whoops."
"That didn't sound good. Something wrong?"
"No, nothing wrong, that's just the problem. It worked."
"Huh?"
"It wasn't supposed to work, it was supposed to break." (TechGnome)

- This story is about as funny as a dead rabbit - meaning that at least a few of you will be in stitches. (eye.of.the.dragonfly)

-"The last time you said 'hmm', we got arrested, so I think I reserve the right to know why you're going 'hmm'." (Willocwen)

On Channel 6 Eyewitness News, everyone bleeds in technicolor. (An_D)

For every generation there is an event or a day whose details will be forever ingrained on our collective consciences: Kennedy’s assassination, Princess Diana’s death, and 9-11, for example. For my generation that day was November 21, 2043. (Piyer)

"That can't be right, because if it was right, I'd be wrong, and we definitely, DEFINITELY, cannot have that." (theclass)

"It's funny how my life didn't really start until the world ended." (shroomlet)

The following events are not sensible, but then again, what is? (theclass)

I had wanted him dead for so long that when he was finally gone, I missed him. (yasjay)

The moon rose, red and deadly, on the night of the twenty-first of October -- a night I will never forget. (racheldenham)

This is a story about my penis. (Willocwen)

"If good is evil, and evil is good, then what's the point?" (HarpieSiren)

This is a story about why a person should never divide by zero. (SekaiRin)

-I have horrible luck. It's the last hand of a poker game to decide my continued health and I got a 3, 2 jokers, a rules card, and a Circle of Protection:Blue. (Zombiehead1)

- "If you're going to kill yourself, you should at least make it as inconvienent as possible for everyone else."

- "Close the window, will you? They're shooting people down at the church again."

- Ever have that feeling? You know, when you wake up, hit your alarm, and realize that the second you open your front door, your life would never be the same?

- "Well then, perhaps you don't deserve to breathe at all. Scalpel." (roefactor)

I squeezed the trigger but the chamber was empty, and in that single act realized it was all over.

The police lights began filling my vision, the woman beside me crying for me to keep breathing, but the sound was fading and raindrops started collecting on my face.

"Yes," I remember telling him with firm conviction, "given the chance I would do it all over again. I wouldn't change a thing." (Tom Martin)

"I will be buried with my marionettes." (Ditzaphrenic)

- "You violated the policy, sir - I must ask that you return your Frequent Killer card at once." (roefactor)

It was clear they were in trouble.

Life deals some really funny hands sometimes, doesn't it? (ghostrose)

It was nine in the morning. It was way too early for man-slaughter. (There's Your Preppy)

-When (insert character) answered the door, he didn't know what he expected, a dripping wet fourteen-year-old was not one of them. Funny thing was... It hadn't been raining. (KisekiShojo)

He awoke to a warm, fuzzy world. Unfortunately, this was due not to a benevolent change in world policy, but rather to the high doses of morphine administered for his crippling injuries.

If I'd only brought a clean hankerchief that morning, I wouldn't be spending the evening lying in the middle of a circle of chanting Satanists with a dark shape materialising behind me.

I've always believed in the one, two, three rule: one horrific life-threatening accident is an accident; two are a coincidence; and three means you really need to consider another line of work.

After that Sunday, I decided that anyone saying 'Don't worry, nothing could possibly go wrong' was really asking for a punch in the jaw. (Eilisanne)

+ It was one of those mornings when I really wished I hadn't quit drinking.

+ Well, I'll be damned. You aren't even safe under the covers anymore! (tmtCatalyst)

Of all the ideas I've had over the years, this was the one that bore fruit?

She doesn't know what I tuck beneath my pillow every night.

She pulled the heavy white door closed with a shut and locked it; the thin wisp of a scream squeezed its way through the narrow crack between door and wall. (puellanerdii)

Johnny Benson was my first everything -- my first friend, my first love and my first victim.

Paul never understood the value of freedom until he had taken someone else’s.

Death came when I stopped finding pleasure in life.

I hope by revealing the details of what happened I will be found guilty and sentenced to death. (yasjay)

He counted on winning, or at least, getting out with his body in one piece. (fifthline)

-I've got 6 slugs in me. Two are lead, the rest are bourbon. (Zombiehead)

It's been three months and I'm still having trouble getting used to not seeing the sun rise in the morning.

There's a reason why men don't go to the bathroom in groups. (roefactor)

She wasn't sure if he was dead or not, but didn't have anything long enough to poke him with from a safe distance. (Joneko)

"Some days, you just know it's a bad time to be anaemic."

"I can't seem to find my intellect. I think I left it at home...wait. Where's home again?" (Chiaroscuro)

It was cold the day I murdered them.

Sometimes there are days that change the course of history. Last Saturday was one of those days.

You will recognize me from the posters. (carriesflame)

In the neighborhood where I walk at night, you can smell a hundred different dinners cooking -- curry, pasta, grilling meat -- but never taste one bite: this is my whole life. (oryx)

"When you cut my hair, your arm brushed against my ear. It was the first time I'd ever touched a woman." (Spider from Mars)

I'm adopting "Unfortunately, I didn't even have 'It seemed like a good idea at the time' as an excuse this time around."
thanks
:)

Here's some lines I wrote for a play for English class. I have a very dry sense of humor, some, or probably all of you, may not see anything humourous in these lines:

Hua: We believe we know the location of the beast.

Young: What must be done?

Hua: You must travel to the site of its layer and slay it.

And some from other various works:

“Hey, buddy. Why are you still awake?”
“I couldn’t sleep.”

“What kind of robbers knock down the door with an explosion? What ever happened to stealth?”

And, some lines from a pesky nine-year-old I created for my NaNo:

“I don’t want to die!”

“What’s a gas chamber?”

“What is ‘extreme shorthand’?”

“What’s a concentration camp?”

(After hearing a response to that question:)

“But,” Broderick began. “We aren’t criminals.”

“What’s ‘branded’?”

(Response)

“That sounds like it would hurt a lot.”

(In response to being told "It's going to be OK:")

“Why do you keep saying that?” Broderick asked. “We both know that it is not going to be ok.”

(Later)

“I’m scared,” Broderick said. “And don’t you dare tell me it’s going to be ok.”

Yes, that character was EXCELLENT for getting my word count up, and yes, he did get "It's going to be OK," as a response to that last statement. :P

They stared into each others eyes, the same time they grinned the same grin and they both knew.

The moon stared down at him as he cried in his 3rd story office, the same moon that stood by as his wife died, the same moon that shone while he sought out the killer, and the same moon that helped him see himself in the dirty reflection.

She dropped the book and as it fell from her hands the last six words of the page floated before her eyes, condemning her as she breathed. The lamp cast a gloom around the room and it became cold and reality had found her in her weakest state imaginable and tears poured down her face. "I will not falter I will not fear. I will not falter ne'er shall I shed idle tear", she whispered to herself many times as she stood and faced her doom that would come when the grandfather clock struck twelve.

Thankies for this! I'm adopting a few of these!
Some to add...

Guy: You need to tell me what you want for your birthday!
Girl1: I told you, you don't need to get anything for me!
Girl2: Or you could just do what I did, wrap up five boxes in duct tape and leave a sticky note in the last box.

Guy: Long names confuse me when I'm reading. When I read (insert book), I was held up by the long names in it so I got an audio tape to listen to.
Girl: Did listening help at all?
Guy. ...well, no.

Teacher: (insert name here), which amendment do you think is the most important?
Girl/Guy: The 19th. I thought it was essential to our country because now no one can be denied the right to vote on account of sex.
Girl/Guy2: Wait, why would you not be allowed to vote because of that?

All of these were real events...the last one is from my history class. Strange things happen there. Our history teacher was telling us about this, and someone still didn't get it...my teacher had to clarify that the 19th amendment referred to gender.

And just because ... this actually comes from a friend of mine. You know how there's always SOMETHING someone will do that you just can't believe they did? His response:

"Have you MET him?" (her/them/me/whatever)

I happen to love this line, and it comes in so handy some days

I love the "Have you MET him?" line. I once said "Have you MET my dad?" when some cheeky guy asked me why I knew all the dirty jokes he was telling.

So, here's one (a cliche one, but whatever, I feel guilty) in case your character is a writer -
"If it wasn't happening to me, it'd be great fodder for my story."

"But that doesn't explain your lack of pants."

"Yes, because I'm clearly going to be able to hijack a plane with a safety pin."

"At least you didn't forget that magic isn''t real when you got three hours of sleep this time."

"God! That's disgusting! Taste it!"

Quite possibly the best line in the history of man.

"I'm your mother, if I don't scar you for life then who will?"

"Mexican orphans need to sell guns too!"

"It’s raining the ice cream of the future!"

"Those are my co-workers pants… the fact that I have a picture of them has an entirely un-creepy explanation… but I’m not going to tell you it because I like creeping people out."

"Eggs should come in better packages than their shells."

"I'm basically a quiet person... I'd like to demonstrate that with about five minutes of awkward silence...."

"My favorite thing about myself is how humble I am. My humility puts others to shame."

"Just please leave that switch in the 'more magic' position."

Taking: "We are the ones who keep doing exactly what we're supposed to be doing, living life in a circle. We are the ones who paint the roses red."

In fact, took. I just used it. Thanks so much!

Leaving:
- "I think the best way to describe our relationship is that you're like the constant in a mathematical equation."
- "Don't you dare complain about how hard it is to get a date. At least there's a 90% chance that the people you ask out will be attracted to your gender."
- "I'll never have to work again!"
"You don't work."

Quite the interesting topic; there were many great lines above, so I'll try to add some more.

"It's not the shape of a person's soul, it's the way it feels."

Person 1: "Why does it seem like you keep popping out of no where?"
Person 2: "It doesn't just 'seem' like it."

"How do you live if you don't know how a can opener works?"

Two characters are together at Person A's house.
Person B: "Let me show you where I live."
Person A: "Okay, where is it?"
Person B: "Here."

Person 1: "Why me?"
Person 2: "It would take longer than your natural lifespan to explain."

"There's just something about the sound of bagpipes in the morning."

Honest to God plausible lines for my upcoming NaNo.

"Hey, if you're going to be an idiot, at least try not to be singing friggin' Red Jumpsuit Apparatus on me."

"Did I ever tell I killed JFK?"
"You've gotta be shitting me."
"Nah, I really did. Bugger Oswald - he couldn't hit a fly at six hundred meters. And bugger the knoll too; I couldn't see anything from there."
"So where did you shoot him from?"
"The bloody deposi-bleedin'-tory, of course, where else would I shoot the sodding President? If I'd had a choice about it I'd've walked up and put a bloody bullet right in his bleedin' head!"

Faughn thought about informing him of the burrock currently sliding its way to him, but decided it was better to do it herself and shot the invertebrate.

"I look friggin' stupid in this picture. Heck, I look friggin' stupid in every picture I've ever appeared in."

"Okay, what we've got to do is march through that ring into what looks like a giant, upright pool of water and really tick off the animal themed armies on the other side with cool slidy headed armor and snakes in their bellies that get into other people's heads, make their eyes glow and think that doing the whole Star League thing their way is a good idea, like fighting in a dueling style like retarded Kurita children, have waaaaaay superior technology and guys who jump up on our 'Mechs and rip off armor plating with their nearly bare hands and bits of fancy jewelry. But don't worry, we'll meet a dark, mysterious guy who's one of them but doesn't like being one of them and offers to become our bondsman in exchange for doing what he likes doing which revolves around revenge, honor, and freedom Mel Gibson style without the skirt."
(Long pause)
"Dude, whatever you're on, drugs, drink, women, standing too close to the heat sink vent ports on your 'Mech, I don't care, I just want some."

"He's going to be ticked about Richard, more annoyed about usurping the throne, and he's going to hate what I've done in the throne room itself, but I think if I get in a really great 'Yo Mama' line Kerensky will fold faster than a poker player with a pair of twos."

"'Yo mama's so dumb, if her brains were cash, she wouldn't have two cents?' WTF, Amaris? You think this is gonna get me to surrender? That does it - guys, load up! We're beating on this fat idiot's home nation!"

"I betcha the General tosses him a 'Yo Mama' response when we get to Terra."