Don't Be A Hero
an excerpt

"Hey there, sweetcheeks. Is that a laser cannon in your spandex or are you just happy to see me?" Ferris asked.

Raymie clung tightly to Ferris because, well, zipline, tall buildings, concrete below, but that didn't mean he wasn't angry with Ferris. "You left me!" he accused loudly.

Ferris shrugged. "Kind of had to. I got kidnapped by a supervillain and was forced to be his evil protoge for a bit. You're a superhero, you know how the gig goes."

"Well, I've never participated in that particular 'gig'," Raymie replied, still sounding a bit miffed. "Seriously? He wanted you to be his evil protoge? What happened? Did he hurt you?"

"Yeah, he did. It was the mind games that really fucked me up, though. Seriously, that guy is twisted."

"Who was it?" Raymie demanded angrily. "The YHU will--"

"Fail," Ferris finished. "It was Close Quarters. Your ex-teammates might be oblivious idiots, but you know better. The YHU doesn't stand a chance against him."

Raymie didn't bother arguing with that, since it was what he'd been saying all along. The YHU was too disorganized and lacked the strategy and the firepower to go up against a villain like Quarters. "How you'd get away?" he asked finally.

Ferris was quiet. "Uh, I didn't," he admitted finally. "I decided to go ahead and do the evil apprentice thing. It's not like I really stood a chance against him and it's not that bad, I guess..."

Raymie held his breath, his brain running through various comic book scenarios. What did former not-quite-heroes do to former superhero friends when they went over to the supervillain side? Well, normally they either ignored them completely, which Ferris was most definitely not doing, judging by the way he'd scooped Raymie up out of the middle of a gang fight and was now carrying him away via zipline to some unknown location... or they developed some kind of sick fascination with killing them.

Raymie figured it was best to just be out with it. "Are you planning on killing me?" he asked.

Ferris didn't reply, vocally at least. Instead, he dropped him. Raymie found himself hurtling towards the street, dozens of stories below him. Raymie ran through possible scenarios of how he could use his powers to stop himself from falling, but he couldn't create dupes like this and there was no speed movement that would make connecting with the ground hurt any less...

But then Ferris caught him wordlessly, "I'm not going to kill you, even though I could," he said. He was fighting to keep a blank, expressionless tone. Raymie could tell it was fake. The jerk was laughing at him! He thought it was funny, dropping Raymie from ridiculous heights when he knew -- he had to know, it was Ferris -- that Raymie's powers wouldn't work right unless he had something vaguely semi-solid under his feet. If Ferris hadn't been such a jerk before, Raymie would have thought this was his supervillain-ness showing through.

"F-fine." Raymie was embarrassed to hear a stutter in his voice. "Then why are you kidnapping me?"

"To keep you safe," Ferris said, "Quarters is interested in you. He isn't going to touch you, though. He can't. You need to stay away from him."

"Well I wasn't planning on seeking him out," Raymie retorted.

"Not seeking him out isn't good enough. You need protection." That was when Raymie realized where they were heading.

"No!" he whined loudly. "Ferris! I just quit the YHU two weeks ago! I can't go crawling back to them, asking for protection now! I'll leave town. I'll go back to Jack's if I have to. Don't make me go to the YHU!"

"You're acting like a two year old," Ferris snorted as they finally landed at the entrance to the YHU Underground. "You know the HU is busy with other stuff, so lame as they are, the YHU is your best choice."

Ferris knocked on the door loudly. "Hey, open up! I have a present for you!"

Raymie glared. "Present?" he demanded.

Ferris shrugged, hints of a teasing smirk edging along his mouth.

Kid opened the door. Raymie could see the rest of the team slightly behind him. "What do you -- Q!" He stumbled forward and wrapped Raymie in a hug. "Where have you been? The team hasn't been the same without you! Even MB missed you a little."

"I did not," MB sneered. "I just happened to mention that Q's powers would be useful when we were fighting The Stopwatch."

Kid finished hugging Raymie, but didn't quite let go of him, keeping one arm wrapped around his shoulders in a surprisingly tight hold, like he was worried Raymie would throw another temper tantrum and race off if Kid didn't hold on tight enough. With Raymie secure in his grasp, Kid looked up at Ferris gaurdedly. "Done trying corrupt our teammate, Ferris Wheel?"

Ferris looked as if he didn't really believe Kid had just called him Ferris Wheel. "...Right. Look, apparently you're all giddy and excited to have Raymie back --"

"Speak for yourself," MB mumbled.

Ferris glared at him briefly before continuing. "But I didn't bring him back so that he could rejoin your team. Close Quarters is on the hunt for Raymie. I'm bringing him to you for protection."

"Explain," Kid said instantly.

"Ooh! Who's the cutie?" Lane demanded, practically bouncing out of the HQ. Raymie started visibly. It still unnerved him seeing Lane with full control over his age-shifting powers. Seeing the former toddler prance around hitting on Ferris of all people was downright alarming.

"Ferris, necromancer. They call me VooDoo. Or," he added with an amused smirk in Kid's direction, "some of the wittier among us like to call me Ferris Wheel."

"Huh," Lane said, frowning a bit and circling around Ferris to get an all-angles view. "You look a lot like Raymie. But with hair gel and a creepy mask."

"He doesn't look a thing like Raymie!" Kid said instantly. "Lane, he's evil! Or something close to it."

"No, I'm properly evil now," Ferris corrected cheerily. His watch buzzed loudly. "Speaking of which, I've got to run. Could you guys make sure that Raymie doesn't get hurt or run off or whatever? My boss is demanding my presence and I figure I'd better make at least make an appearance before running off to do less-evil-than-he'd-really-prefer deeds."